Chapter 9

"I'm moving out." The sudden silence that ensued at my out-of-the-blue announcement lasted mere seconds before two voices broke into a cacophonous machine gun of questioning. My eyes flicked from one face to another but it was on the stone face of Bella's father that they lingered.

"Edward, no," my mother lamented.

"What? Why?" Bella demanded.

But it was Charlie's silence accompanied by his narrowing eyes that held my attention. With not so much as a word, I could feel him grilling me.

"I kissed her. I kissed Bella."

His eyes turned to slits. My mother gasped and Bella's speech became stuttered and flustered. I forced myself to hold his gaze.

"She's not just a casual fu-" I pressed my lips together. "Not that we've . . . 'cause we didn't. I wouldn't, well, maybe. But we shouldn't, because she's not. I want to, but I want her. More. With her, I mean. Which is why I'm moving out."

To my left I heard Bella groan, "Oh God," with her face in her hands.

It wasn't exactly the eloquent speech I'd planned. Though I'd never intended on telling him the details, I needed to confess at least a little. I felt like I needed his absolution before I could honestly gain his permission, because I wanted his daughter – carnally, yes – but legitimately as well. I wanted her in every way, and I couldn't gain Charlie's permission, let alone his blessing, with so much hiding and sneaking and guilt.

In the darkness the night before, I'd done what I'd been dreaming of for so long. In the midst of my horror and shame, Bella had taken my hand and pulled me into her bed. We talked all night, me listening to her for a change. Every word from her mouth, whispered to me in the darkness, confirmed she was all that I'd never dared hope for.

And for once I got to watch her come. She whimpered into my neck as I coaxed her with my fingers and my words. "So beautiful, Bella. Waited so long. Wanted to see you. Come for me, baby. Let me watch." She bucked against me, grasped desperately at my shoulders, and writhed in my arms. When she'd finished, she lay sated and sweaty in the crook of my arm. When she shivered I covered us both, and we slept.

At the breakfast table this morning, after a few well timed texts, I was able to solidify my plans.

"Emmett's roommate is moving out. I'm moving in with him. Today."

"Edward, you don't have to do this."

"I do, Mom. But more than that, I want to. It's like what Charlie said." I glanced over at him. He still hadn't said a word. "He's got this, right? So I'm going to go do my thing, and I can't do that here."

Tears streaked down Bella's face. "Bella, you understand, don't you? Why I can't be here like that?" My eyebrows raised with meaning. The blush in her cheeks told me she understood what I wasn't saying. But, for all the world, her expression looked like I was abandoning her. She nodded minutely.

Charlie cleared his throat. "I'm off today. I'll help you move. We can use Bella's truck."

"Daddy! Dad, tell him he can stay." Her little girl pout didn't phase him. He wasn't falling for the whine when she said daddy, either.

"No," Charlie answered, his eyes never leaving mine. I cringed under his glare, dropped my gaze to my lap, hopeless in ever gaining back his respect. Surely he could see through all I had said to what I hadn't. "Edward. You're always welcome here." One of his eyebrows rose.

I could only nod at him, then stood, deposited my plate in the sink and went upstairs to pack. One box into it and I heard Bella standing in my doorway sniffling. "You know I can't stay here, baby. I couldn't stop myself before, and I wouldn't be able to stop myself now that you know." I rested my hands on her hips and leaned down to nuzzle her neck. There was no more desire in me to leave her than she had for me to go. Only the draw of having her for real, for keeps, could make me do what I was doing.

She sniffed and nodded against my chest. Her tears soaked through my t-shirt.

"Go out with me?" I asked.

"What? Like on a date?"

I chuckled at her. "Yes, on a date. You know, those things normal people do with their girlfriends – dinner, a movie, wondering if you'll let me kiss you on your doorstep when I drop you off. The whole shebang." Smiling, I brushed her cheek with the back of my fingers.

She swallowed and stuttered out, "G-girlfriend?"

I hesitated. "If you'll have me. That is, if you want me." Nerves overtook me. Maybe after all this she wouldn't.

"Well, I don't know. I told Jake I'd go down to LaPush for the bonfire this weekend . . ." Her coy smile did nothing to assuage my anger.

"I swear if you let the shoe-sniffing dog touch you, I'll break his hands."

"There's Mike to consider, too, of course. He seemed like he might be interested, maybe I could give him a call?"

"Bella," I growled and palmed her ass, bringing her flush against me. "You're ass is mine, do you hear me? Let another man touch you and I'll go all 'big brother' on him."

"Hmmm," she hummed and palmed my cock through my jeans. "Big brother, indeed. So tell me, Bro, on this date of ours, am I gonna get me a little brotherly love?"

"Absofuckinglutley," I said as I kissed her.