Revise edition of the story 'Imaginary'

"When she awoke, the world was on fire." ― Scott Westerfeld

Screaming.

It was a dark, an almost opaque morning. Faye O'Connor was walking carefully throughout the dense Beacon Hills Preserve, her bare feet padding quietly against the dirt and leaves. She could see tiny cuts littering her feet from stepping on thorns and other sharp objects in the woods, but she couldn't actually feel a thing. As she pushed herself through the densely packed shrubbery, she found herself in front of what looked to be an average suburban home. It was three stories high with a wrap around porch, a mansard roof and a balustrade. Flashes of children laughing and playing in the wide opened field in the front of the house flashed before Faye's eyes. Suddenly, she looked towards the front of the house sensing a presence; there in the doorway stood a young man. He was rather tall, Faye could tell, he stood at what she presumed to be 6' or 6'1; he was also relatively lean. A large smile encompassed his face, his pearly whites shinning against the darkness of the day. She could faintly see the glowing happiness in his almond shaped grey eyes, eyes that looked like wild storm clouds. Faye's body instantly relaxed when his eyes caught her emerald one's, they seemed to suck the tension right out of her bones. Yet, she was shocked when she watched him smile and come barreling towards her. And then unexpectedly, it was if she were a ghost and he ran straight through her into the arms of an older woman. She felt the familiar nauseous feeling in her stomach that signaled to her that where she was, was not reality.

"Derek!" She heard the older girl smile as she wrapped her arms around his broad shoulders.

"Hey Laura! We were wondering where you ran off to last night." He chuckled, causing the girl in front of him to roll her eyes.

"Just a late night run, you know how it goes. Are you ready?" She asked him curiously, looking around for any sign of his school bags and books.

"Yeah, let's go." Derek told her quickly as he ran back into his house and grabbed a large bag from beside the door.

Faye watched on curiously, she knew for a fact that dreams always had some revelance to her life, but she really had no idea what any of this meant. She had never met the boy and girl in question, and she had never before ever seen the house. Abruptly, it all stopped; she could no longer see the boy and the girl anymore. Everything had quieted down around her and it was as if the world were turning in slow motion, she watched as two men came up to the house and began to pour gasoline over any space they could find. All too quickly they had drenched the entire house of unsuspecting victims, and before she could try and stop them they had lit the match. In no more than ten seconds the entire house was engulfed in flames, and Faye stood stock-still with tears in her eyes. It was as if she could feel everything the innocents were feeling, she could feel the desperation, the pleading and begging for mercy. She could feel the hopelessness and pure terror they all felt. She clutched her body tight, trying to hold herself together as she continued to sob heavily. She was rocking back and forth, trying to control the pain, trying to control the emotions chorusing through her veins. As she tried to find anyway to control her tears, she was able to make out the silhouette of a young woman standing near the flames, a wicked smile held in place on her lips. She took one look towards Faye, almost as if she could truly see her. Faye wanted to wipe that look right off her face, the woman before her stared at her as if she were God and she had just made her final judgment. Faye continued to watch the girl as she walked closer to her, trying to make out any sort of familiarity about her, but she was at a loss. Suddenly something had gone terribly wrong, no longer was she invisible to the wild woman before her. No, Faye could see eaisly that the woman was quite apparent to her presence.

"We can't have any witnesses now, darling." The woman smiled as she carefully ran a delicate hand through Faye's long chestnut curls.

All too quickly Faye watched as the woman pulled out what looked to be a small revolver and aimed it directly between her eyes. With no warning what so ever and in the timeframe of a single bat of her lashes the woman pulled the trigger and Faye could no longer stop the screams that erupted from her lungs.

Greyson O'Connor had just arrived home, throwing his keys onto the large mantle beside the door; he shrugged out of his blazer and hung it up on the coat rack. He had just barely set foot into the kitchen, his hand reaching towards the fully stocked fridge when he heard the unmistakable screams coming from his younger sister Faye's bedroom. Running as fast as he could, he raced up the long winding staircase and stormed into her room; the sight before him breaking his heart. Faye lay out sprawled against the bed, her small hands clutching her sheets for dear life. Screams continued to burst from her lungs, and her body had begun to thrash around kicking and pushing. Jumping right into action, Greyson had managed to get on top of Faye's bed and hold her down, praying he had made it just in time so that she hadn't hurt herself. Faye continued to thrash against him, her eyes never opening once. No matter how hard Greyson tried to get her to calm down she wouldn't, and Greyson could feel his eyes begin to water with fear. He had no idea what was happening to his sister, and the fear that something might be incredibly wrong with her terrified him to his very core. Suddenly, and without any warning Faye managed to pull out of his grasp and she screamed out a single name.

"DEREK! DEREK HALE!" She shrieked before allowing herself to collapse back into the warm and safe arms of her brother.

Hi everyone, I had initially written this story under the name "Imaginary" except there was one small problem; I had begun to hate my characters and story line. I also realized I wasn't getting any reviews, and not that much positive feedback so I decided to revise it and not make it so predictable So, for the first few chapters it's a bit the same although I have added and subtracted many parts. I was really just trying to work on adding more depth to my characters and more action to the chapters to leave people wanting more. Anyway, now that I'm through talking, I would greatly appreciate your feedback. Please don't think you are bothering me, or any of the sort. Honestly any type of feedback is good feedback, if you love my story comment, if you hate it? Comment and let me know why you think that. Just please don't leave me hanging in the dark over here lol.