They found their place.

I don't understand how it happened so suddenly. One was a king of Karasumori High. The others were bathed in their own glory by following the path of the so-called delinquents. But one day, it changed. And one by one they all left. I couldn't take it.

That's the thing, though. How is it that they could fall like that? Kiyama, Ryosuke, Wataru. I'd like to say I understand, but I don't think I ever really will. I want to call them weak, so I spit insults at them, and watch as they take it, all because of their precious Rhythmic Gymnastics Club. That fucking club. It's how it all started, isn't it?

Sometimes I wonder what it would've been like if that club had never even existed. Maybe they all would have drifted eventually, gotten caught up in something else, but I don't believe it. If that fucking club had never existed, it never would have come to this, me beating them down with my words, and my fists, and metal pipes. I wish it never existed. I wish it could go back to how it was before, when everything was so much simpler, back when I was content to simply live in Wataru's shadow, back when I could call them all friends.

And as much as I hate them, as much as I want to call them all spineless, pathetic, bitches, I can't make myself actually mean it. At the end of the day, at the end of the fight, they're all still a team. They have each other to depend on, and to celebrate with. And I have no one.

When I leave, and sink to my knees on the street at some odd hour, because I just couldn't stop running away from it all, I wonder what exactly drove me to do the things I did. I wanted to see them crumble so bad...I wanted them to know that I was the cause, the reason why their dreams could never come true. I wanted them to see me again. Because I don't have a place. And maybe I don't want to have a place, I don't know. Having a place seems like bullshit.

But when I see them smiling together, and working together, when I just want to rip it all apart, I know why I did what I did.

I was jealous of them.

Could anyone ever make such an evil character human? Am I attempting the impossible? I don't know, but I think Kiyama hit it on the head when he called Akabane jealous in episode 11. So...this was my result...

xDisgraceful Avengerx