This story came to me when I was sitting on a flight, a couple of weeks ago- it was long, and I had nothing much to do… plus, I've seen the new Almodovar film "Los amantes pasajeros" ("I'm so excited") the week before- it all clicked together.
Summary: Welcome aboard flight no. 4276 from London Heathrow to New York JFK- please take your seat in the first class and our accomplished cabin crew, led by Kurt and Santana will see to your every need. Have a pleasant flight, and remember- in case of an emergency, life jackets are located under your seats. AU.
I just can't get enough
(Title from the song- "I'm so excited" by the Pointer sisters)
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Kurt straightened his stripped tie, and buttoned up his blazer- soon the passengers were going to start boarding the aircraft and he had to make sure he looked presentable enough. Knocking on the bathroom's door he called out,
"San! Two minutes till boarding starts!" the bathroom door slid open and out stepped Santana, zipping her make-up bag shut,
"How do I look?" She asked, moving her head from side to side and sending Kurt a flirting look from under her too-long-in-his-opinion eyelashes, he matched her look with a raised eyebrow,
"Like you're trying too hard." Santana shrugged,
"Well, you never know who we might get onboard." Kurt shook his head; he didn't have the time or energy to have the 'will you stop having sex with passengers' argument again. The two positioned themselves by the door, smiling broadly as people began to board.
This was one of Kurt's favorite parts of the flight- he liked watching the people coming in, most of them he didn't know of course, but every now and again they got returning passengers like Miss Sylvester who was flying quite frequently with them on the New York-London line for business. She never divulged information about what sort of business, but coupled with her badass attitude Kurt and Santana firmly believed she was a hired assassin, and did their best to stay on her good side. But Kurt liked her despite the fact she could probably kill him without arousing anyone's suspicion or leaving any trace- she was smart and witty and oh so tall and seemed to like him quite a bit and Kurt knew that because she called him 'Porcelain' rather than 'Sandbags' as she called Santana. Usually Miss Sylvester would take her seat, ordered her gin and tonic with a lemon twist, pull a book and fade into the background for the rest of the flight, usually leaving Kurt and Santana to come up with wild theories about how she managed to get her weapons onboard.
Quite often they got celebrities on their flights, this was after all first class- Kurt didn't really like them, they tended to be high maintenance and got offended if you didn't know who they were, and Kurt and Santana loved gossip just as the next person but even they couldn't follow every reality-alumni D-level celebs that were passing through.
Today they had Will Schuster, who was the new teen heartthrob sensation around- even though he himself was nearing 30, teen girls just couldn't get enough of his sticky sweet songs. Kurt wondered how much trouble would the man be, because he kept a squeaky clean image and was considered such a nice guy in general Kurt knew it couldn't be real.
Behind him stepped a young couple that had 'Newlywed' written all over them, both smiling wide and holding hands. Kurt liked them immediately; happy couples made the best passengers- usually they were so absorbed in one another they left the cabin crew well alone.
The next one through the door was a young man, with a nonchalant air and a leather jacket that made him look like he was in a rock band. His hazel eyes locked on Kurt's immediately and Kurt felt his breath stop. A slow smirk spread on the man's face and Kurt just knew this will lead to trouble- but damn the man was gorgeous! Brushing past Kurt the man walked to his seat, just knowing that Kurt's eyes were glued to his ass the whole way and adding a little extra swing to his hips that caused Kurt to blush. A sharp elbow to his ribs brought Kurt painfully back to reality,
"Big Trouble!" Santana muttered under her breath, his smile fixed and the muscles of her jaw tight. Kurt looked over and groaned inwardly, oh gods, he was hoping for a quiet flight today… putting on a smile with effort both flight attendants greeted the petite woman who stepped in, Rachel Berry- a Broadway Diva who had earned every scrap of her bad reputation fair and square. Even if she hadn't flown with them before Kurt only had to look in the tabloids to know what a handful Diva Berry was. The fact that they knew firsthand what sort of nightmare she could be caused Kurt and Santana to dub her as "The BerryBitch"- strictly between them of course. Before she even reached her seat Rachel turned to Kurt and Santana,
"I want a glass of Champagne," she said with a condescending yet very fake smile, "And get me the good kind, not the cheap stuff." Kurt instinctively grabbed Santana's hand before she could lash out and smiled at Rachel,
"Of course, Miss." Leaving Santana to greet the rest of the passengers onboard Kurt started making a drinks round, mentally marking possible problematic passengers to share with Santana later.
The newlywed couple, who enthusiastically introduced themselves and Tina and Mike, looked so grateful for the complimentary Champagne, Kurt almost laughed- first time passengers in first class were always a good entertainment. Plus, he may be a sap (as Santana frequently said) but he loved couples who were unashamedly in love, before routine and every day troubles wore them down.
Walking around he noticed that Will Schuster, instead of snapping his fingers for service was sprawled over in his seat, so deep in sleep even before they took off that Kurt knew it was medically aided, but that was just fine by Kurt. Next to Will sat the gorgeous man who didn't waste the opportunity to bestow another one of his sexy grins on Kurt, who felt himself blushing again, to his utter shame.
"What can I get you, sir?" He asked politely, hoping he didn't look too flushed,
"You got any corona beer?" The man asked, and Kurt mentally booed his choice,
"Of course, I'll bring you one right away." He said instead with a tight smile and walked to the crew area to get all the orders done.
Placing a Champagne flute in front of Rachel Berry he was rewarded with a bright theatrical smile that made Kurt skin crawl with disgust. Reaching for the napkin under the glass, Rachel pulled out a pen and quickly scribbled her autograph with a flourish,
"Here," She said sweetly, "A little memento from me." Kurt took the napkin, his jaw clenched tight,
"Thank you, Miss…" Kurt made a show of reading the name scrawled on the napkin, "Berry." Before Rachel could even narrow her eyes in contempt Kurt turned and walked back to the cabin area where Santana was waiting with a wide grin and a raised hand. Kurt high-fived her and then crumpled the offensive napkin and tossed it in the garbage. The nerve of some people!
"Good evening ladies and gentlemen and welcome aboard flight 2476 to New York JFK airport, this is your captain speaking. We will be taking off shortly; time of flight is estimated at about seven and a half hours, the skies are clear all the way to our destination, so seat back and enjoy your flight. Will the cabin crew please close the doors and proceed to their seats." The voice sounded around the plane, and Kurt walked over to the door to shut it before quickly running to coach to make sure they were all prepared for takeoff.
Soon enough the plane was in the air, and Kurt and Santana were milling about once again. They now had about seven and a half hours to pass in the air before they reached JFK airport, and Kurt just hoped they will pass quietly. Usually in those long flights, passengers tended to drop off towards the middle and leave the cabin crew relatively free- a time that Santana usually spent trying to coax attractive girls into the bathroom for a little 'Mile high' action, a behavior Kurt tried his best to dissuade but never actually reported, while he himself usually went to talk to Miss Sylvester or, if she wasn't flying with them that day, sit in the crew area and read a book until someone needed him.
"I'm going into the cockpit." He told Santana and walked over to knock on the cockpit door, waiting for the pilots to buzz him in. "What can I get you guys?" He asked with a cheerful voice,
"I could just kill for a glass of whisky." Said Sam, the co-pilot, giving Kurt a very hopeful smile. Kurt chuckled, patting Sam's shoulder sympathetically,
"That'll be water then. And for you, David?" Captain Karofsky started, his usual reaction when Kurt was around and he was caught gazing at him with longing eyes- luckily, so far Kurt hasn't noticed,
"Hum, same, yeah." Kurt smiled brightly and David felt his breath catching, looking at the cute flight attendant until the door closed behind his back. Sam watched his colleague and shook his head; this crush David had on Kurt was frankly embarrassing to watch.
"You're pathetic." He said but David simply waved his words aside with a grunt.
Kurt spent the next hour busy running between passengers who were demanding food and drinks and those who were having problems understanding how the entertainment system on the plane worked and Rachel Berry that the only thing she hasn't complained about so far was how high they were flying and that was probably only because she didn't know.
After yet another harrowing round of complaints, this time about the pillows Kurt was able to retreat to the relative safety to the crew area where Santana gave him a glass of juice, an Advil and a sympathetic smile,
"Damn it, if she says one more thing about the damn pillows," He complained to Santana, "I swear I'm going to choke her with one of them!"
"You know, there's a safer way to get her to shut up…" Kurt and Santana both looked sharply at the voice. The gorgeous guy was leaning against the wall, looking completely at ease with the fact he was caught eavesdropping on a private conversation,
"Who the hell are you?" Santana snapped at him, but he only smiled pleasantly, giving Kurt another sultry look,
"My name is Noah Puckerman, and the guy snoring in the seat next to me," He said, jerking his thumb back to indicate the sleeping Will Shuster, "Has these little pills he took right before we took off, he's got a bottle of them in his pocket, they seem to work real good." Santana and Kurt both craned their necks to look at the sleeping pop star before Santana gave Noah a little wink,
"Excuse me, gentlemen." She said and was off before Kurt could say a word. Kurt turned disbelieving eyes at Noah,
"I just can't… You just…" Noah shot him a happy smile, completely unashamed of his actions and quite enjoying seeing Kurt splattering with indignation. Before long Santana came back, looking utterly proud of herself, and holding a little pill bottle. Kurt sighed,
"Ok, let's not get carried away here, we're not going to drug Rachel Berry just because she annoys us, we don't even know what sort of pills these are!" He pointed out, taking the pill bottle from Santana, and turning it around- it had no label. Trust rich people to have access to illegal experimentally drugs…
"Kurt, I refuse to spend the next five hours listening to that garden gnome complaining about the sky being the wrong fucking shade of blue!" Santana said loudly as she snatched the bottle back from Kurt and quickly dissolved two pills in a flute of Champagne. Kurt was just about to open his mouth to argue when Brittany, one of the coach crew walked in with tears in her eyes,
"I just came to ask for more napkins and this woman called me a stupid blond bimbo when I told her we didn't have any other sort of pillows." She sniffed miserably, and Santana immediately wrapped her arms around her, giving Kurt a meaningful look over the upset girl's shoulder. Kurt squared his jaw, and snatched the spiked drink from the counter- it was one thing to hassle him and Santana about but making someone as sweet and gentle as Brittany cry was just too much!
Santana and Noah watched as Kurt coaxed Rachel into drinking the champagne and then Kurt came back, angrily pulling trays and food packages without looking over at the passengers.
"Get back to your seat, sir." Kurt nearly barked at Noah, who upon seeing the look on Kurt's face, raised his hands in submission and followed Kurt's orders without arguing. "I'm going to give David and Sam their meals." He snapped at Santana and proceeded to the cockpit without waiting for an answer. She waved to him away without taking her eyes off Rachel, waiting for the pills to kick in.
"Hey Kurt, what have you got for us?" Sam asked cheerfully, as Kurt handed over the trays,
"It's beef and mushrooms with a side of roast potatoes." Sam nodded as he took his tray, before looking at Kurt and bestowing his most charming smile at the other man,
"Can I have a coke with that?" Kurt crossed his arms over his chest and gave Sam a reproachful look,
"Sam, you know I can't give you that, your diabetes will go wild and frankly, we need you to fly this plane." Kurt said with a soft smile, he liked Sam, he really did and that's why he never caved in to his sugar craves, and unfortunately for Sam he's had years of training dealing with his dad dietary demands and sweet tooth. "Drink your water."
"Water is boring." Sam said petulantly, his tone of voice causing Kurt to burst out laughing. He looked sideways at David, who seemed engrossed in the machinery before him, completely ignoring the two other people in the cockpit. Kurt frowned a little but said nothing as he left the flying deck, not wanting to interrupt. Sam looked over at David and sighed, oh boy. "You know, I have the perfect solution for you." David looked up surprised, abandoning the pretence he was monitoring the aircraft's controls,
"I don't have a problem." He snapped at Sam, who rolled his eyes,
"You need to get laid," He said, pointing at David with his plastic fork, "And since you seem to like flight attendants, you should hook up with Jose."
"Why do you think I need to get laid?" Sam raised an eyebrow and for a long moment the two were engaged in a staring contest until David averted his eyes and seemed to deflate, "Fine, who the hell is Jose?"
"He's working the South America lines mostly; he's very nice and quite gorgeous." Something in his tone cased David to stop in the middle of taking the lid off his lunch,
"Sam Evens!" He cried accusingly, "You've got a girlfriend!"
"I know! And I'm not cheating on Mercedes; it was before I met her!" Sam responded, before catching himself and adding, "Besides, it was only a blow job." David chuckled,
"Please tell me it was on land and not mid flight." Sam shrugged noncommittally and David let out a noise that sounded much like a disgusted gag, causing Sam to laugh.
"I think he'll be right up your alley," Sam said with a wide grin, "And then maybe you'll stop ogling…" A sharp knock on the door caused Sam to quiet down aided by the sharp look David sent his way before he buzzed Kurt in.
"Would you like some coffee or tea?" He asked pleasantly, and Sam nodded,
"Coffee please." Kurt turned to look at David expectantly and the captain swallowed hard,
"Um, do you still have that herbal tea?" He asked with a somewhat gruff voice,
"The one with the ginger and honey?" David nodded and Kurt smiled wide,
"Sure thing." He chirped and turned to the door, David's gaze glued to his back. Sam meanwhile was looking sadly at his desertless tray before turning greedy eyes towards David's, his hand reaching stealthily over to the chocolate cake. Without turning his head David sharply smacked the hand away from his cake, shaking his head at Sam who pouted in return.
"Down, at last!" Santana cried out triumphantly as Kurt closed the cockpit door behind him and he rushed over to look behind the curtain at Rachel Berry who was indeed, deep asleep. "Goddammit! That took forever, what the hell is she on? For a minute there I was afraid it won't work on her and we'd have to resort to the pillow throttling…" Santana complained loudly and Kurt chuckled despite of himself.
"Let's just forget about it." He told Santana meaningfully, and the Latina shrugged,
"Sure. Well then, if you don't mind, there's a very cute brunette in seat five that is just begging for some attention," Santana said with a sultry little smile, causing Kurt to mentally gag, "And now that the newlyweds have finally vacated the toilet, it's time." Before Kurt could stop her she quickly pulled her ponytail loose, letting the dark curls fall on her shoulders and stepped away from the shelter of the crew area marching towards the aforementioned seat number five.
"Ten bucks she won't get her in that bathroom." Kurt startled a little, cursing Noah's ability to sneak up on him so easily,
"Oh, you don't know Santana." He answered with a smirk, and sure enough, as they both watched the cute brunette from seat five got to her feet, brushed very suggestively against Santana and made her way towards the bathroom. Santana gave Kurt a triumphant smile and followed suit. Kurt rolled his eyes at Santana's behavior and held up his hand, palm up. Noah grunted a little as he dug out his wallet and slapped a ten dollar bill into Kurt's palm. Smiling sweetly as the man Kurt pocketed the money.
"You know, we could do the same…" Kurt felt his whole face going red in an instant hearing Noah's words, and he carefully did not look at the other man as he answered as primly as he could,
"There's hardly room in there for one person, let alone four. Plus, I'm not really into group sex!" Noah chuckled, the sound causing strange things to Kurt's stomach, "If you'll excuse me, I need to check everything is in order in coach." Before Noah could say a word Kurt practically fled to the relative safety of the economy class, sending Brittany over to the first class so that he could get his bearings together before returning.
Peaking around the separating curtain a little while later Kurt was glad to notice that everything in his class seemed in order; everyone was back in their seats, including the cute brunette who had a goofy smile, messy hair and a very satisfied expression on her face. Kurt walked over to where Miss Sylvester was seated, carefully sitting in the empty seat next to her- he wasn't really sure how she did it, but there was always an empty seat next to Miss Sylvester.
"So, Porcelain, why didn't you take that man on his offer?" She asked pleasantly, carefully marking the place in her book before turning to fix Kurt with her piercing blue eyes, causing Kurt to flush with embarrassment,
"For one thing, it's completely unprofessional." He muttered,
"Didn't seem to stop Sandbags over there." Sue pointed out and Kurt wanted to slap Santana.
"I'm not like Santana." He mumbled, somewhat petulantly- even though he knew Miss Sylvester was teasing him he really hated when people assumed that just because he was a flight attendant he was easy.
"Clearly." Miss Sylvester said, in her version of apology, "It was a very clever move you two pulled on the BerryBitch," She said with a smile that deepened into in a smirk when she saw Kurt's astonished expression. How the hell did she know about the 'BerryBitch'? and damn it, did the whole plane noticed they drugged her? "What sort of pills did you use?" Kurt tried to shrug,
"Dunno, why?" Sue Sylvester shrugged,
"Just for general knowledge." Was she trying to find new methods to improve her work? Miss Sylvester certainly didn't look like she needed to sedate her victims in order to shoot them. Kurt briefly wondered how much she charged for each job- it was probably quite a lot if she flew first class practically every other week, and why the hell did she go all the way to London, there were plenty of bad people to kill back home. And was maiming more or less expensive than killing? Kurt shook his head to regain his equilibrium and frantically searched for a safe topic that wouldn't incriminate either of them,
"So, how is your sister doing?" Sue let out a soft snort of laughter,
"You're a sly little minx Porcelain, changing the subject like that," Kurt gave a cute half shrug, to indicate he was flattered she noticed, "But since you asked, she's doing good- in fact, I'm heading over to see her as soon as we land." Kurt smiled,
"That's great." Talking about Miss Sylvester sister was always a safe topic, as she seemed so happy to talk about her. She was so proud of her and Kurt liked it. Before he could say something else one of the passengers raised his hand to press the call button, "Shit, I'm sorry, I've got to go." He apologized as he got up from his seat, but Miss Sylvester just waved him away gently.
Kurt managed to hold it together long enough to serve the man before he knocked on the cockpit door and then marched towards the little sofa in the back, slumping down with his head in his hands- he was a criminal, he drugged a passenger without her consent with something that was probably illegal and now Miss Sylvester also noticed! Would she report him? Won't she be putting herself in danger of being discovered as a hit woman as well? Damn you Santana anyway for putting ideas in his head!
"Is… everything alright, Kurt?" Sam's voice was a little worried, as if he wasn't sure it was wise to talk to Kurt in case he exploded, or worse, burst into tears. Kurt sighed and lowered his hands,
"I'm fine." He said gravely, and David and Sam exchanged a glance before David said gently,
"Um, you might want to head back, then, we start landing in about ten minutes." Kurt took a deep breath and nodded, standing up and straightening his uniform,
"Of course." He smiled at the pilots and made his way back out. Taking the receiver of the in-flight intercom he cleared his throat before pressing the button, "Good evening Ladies and Gentlemen, this is your crew manager speaking. We are about to begin landing proceedings shortly, therefore you are requested to return to your seats- strap on your safety belt and straighten your seat back. Please make sure the table in front of you in a closed position and that any bags are safely stowed either in the overhead compartments or under the seat in front of you. The toilets are no longer available for usage. Thank you." Turning around he replaced the receiver back in its place and lifted his eyes to Santana, who was glaring at him,
"Will you pull yourself together?" She snapped in a harsh whisper, Kurt took a deep breath and smiled, yes, he was fine, the flight was nearly over and he was fine! "Now let's go and wake those two up before landing." Marching over to the seat Will Shuster was still snoring in, Santana left Kurt to deal with Rachel Berry. Trying to wake the diva turned out to be quite a task and Kurt was starting to panic they might have overdosed her with whatever pills they slipped her, but eventually, after Santana came and slapped the girl, none too gently, she began to show signs of life. Kurt glanced towards Will Schuster, who seemed quite used to this sort of thing; if he's almost alert appearance was any indication. He handed Rachel a glass of juice before hurrying to take his seat for the landing.
The landing part was always the hardest part for him, not only because his ears usually blocked during the air pressure changes, but they usually popped open quite painfully just when he was greeting people off the aircraft. But still he stood there with his blazer re-worn and his smile re-polished and made sure everyone was off happily.
The newlyweds, Mike and Tina actually grabbed him and Santana in enthusiastic hugs and thanks on their way out causing both Kurt and Santana to exchange amused glances- who knew after seven hours people could still be so happy and full of life…
Next stepped out Will Schuster, pulling his jacket around him like armor and striding with an expression that suggested he was expecting hoards of fans to assault him at the end of the corridor. Kurt didn't even bother with an eye-roll.
He tried to avoid Miss Sylvester eye as she walked past, muttering,
"It's always a pleasure to have you onboard, Miss…" Above him Sue Sylvester snorted dismissively,
"Save it, Porcelain, we'll probably see each other again next week." Kurt bestowed a genuine smile at her and she winked and waved him goodbye. Say what you want, he liked that woman!
Rachel Berry drifted past him, hugging one of the airplane pillows to her chest. Her expression was dreamy and for once she actually looked like someone Kurt wouldn't mind spending time with,
"Can I keep this?" She chirped happily, nuzzling the pillow affectionately, "It's such a great pillow…" Next to him Kurt could feel Santana was shaking with suppressed laughter, and did his best not to crack,
"Um… yeah, sure, go ahead." He managed before Rachel continued her journey off the airplane, explaining to the man who stepped after her what a great pillow it was while Kurt and Santana were practically leaning against each other giggling like crazy.
More passengers were making their way out, eager to finally leave the confined area of the plane in favor of the relative expanses of the airport. The first class area was emptying quickly, and now the remaining passengers could be counted on one hand. The cute brunette from seat five walked towards Kurt and Santana and with a flirty smile slipped a piece of paper into Santana's cleavage, her hand actually caressing the Latina's boob on the way down. Kurt fixed his gaze straight ahead of him and prayed that Santana won't decide to drag the girl into another bathroom tumble right there and then.
"Do you even know her name?" He hissed at his slutty friend, who reached into her shirt and pulled out the note that was tucked there, reading it briefly she slipped it into her pocket and gave Kurt a blinding smile,
"I do now." Kurt sighed in registration, what was the point really; you just couldn't fight that sort of thing.
One of the last to walk through the door was Noah, wearing his most gorgeous grin as he approached Kurt. Kurt tightened his jaw, hoping he didn't look too flush and embarrass himself,
"I guess I'll… see you round, gorgeous." Noah practically purred and Kurt balled his fists trying to keep his composure. When Noah finally disappeared he felt Santana's hand on his back, rubbing his stiff muscles,
"So, do you even know his name?" She asked sarcastically but Kurt just rolled his eyes, and turned to get his bag, doing his best to ignore Santana's laughter behind him.
The crew, along with the pilots was finally able to get off the plane, each dragging the airline costume issued roll along behind them. Everyone chatted amicably, regaling stories of the flight and laughing. Kurt glanced at his watch, with a bit of luck from the Subway gods he'd be home in just under two hours, and he couldn't wait!
"Hey, Kurt, looks who's here!" Santana cried gleefully and Kurt looked up sharply, expecting to see airport security waiting for him accompanied by a furious Rachel Berry, but what he saw instead was Noah, leaning against a big column and waiting. Trying to calm the erratic beating of his heart he ran a hand through his hair and smiled briefly at his colleagues,
"If you will excuse me guys, I'll see you all in a couple of days." Santana burst out laughing,
"That is if you can still walk in two days!" She practically doubled over with laugher and Kurt bit his lip, trying to bite back a smile and raised his middle finger at her as a farewell before he turned and started making his way towards Noah.
David looked after Kurt, who might not be actually skipping but still looked very pleased to see that bastard waiting for him. Sometimes he wished he wasn't stuck in the cockpit the whole flight, so that he too could see what Kurt and Santana were up to during the flight, because it looked like he missed quite a bit. A little nudge at his arm caused him to look aside at Sam, who handed him a card with a sympathetic smile. David could see the name 'Jose Escada' printed on the card along with his digits. He took one last look at Kurt, who reached the other man, his eyes shining and his lips curved in a smile. With a deep sigh of regret he snatched the card from Sam's hand and marched forward, his gaze fixed straight ahead.
Kurt walked over to Noah, who pushed himself off the column and waited. When he reached over Noah held out his hand silently. Kurt looked at the outstretched hand for a moment, then sighed and reached for his pocket, pulling out a ring and putting it on Noah's palm, before he let his husband slip the ring on his finger. Noah took his time with the task, resting his own ring next to Kurt's for a second.
"I hate it when you take your ring off." He complained with a small pout that made Kurt want to kiss him,
"I just don't want it to get lost." He explained, and it was true, with all the hassle and bustle during the flight the last thing he needed was his ring slipping off and disappearing.
"Yeah, but it makes everyone around think they have a chance with you." Noah complained, he couldn't help it, Kurt was just too cute for his own good and Noah was jealous.
"Ohh," Kurt simpered as he wrapped his arms around Noah's neck, "It's so cute and delusional that you think that…" He said and planted a soft kiss on Noah's pouting lips, "But I don't care what they want, what I want it you." He assured his husband before sealing their lips together and kissing him deep and Noah was only too happy to reciprocate. "But!" Kurt said sharply when he broke the kiss, pushing Noah back a little to give the full benefit of his Look, "That was the last time I'm letting you fly with me!"
"Why?" Noah almost whined, "I behaved." Kurt gave him yet another one of his Looks, and damn but he was good at them!
"You offered to drug a passenger," He said solemnly, counting Noah's crimes on his fingers while his other arm was still wrapped around Noah's neck to make sure the man wasn't going anywhere until he finished his rant, "You tried to get me to have sex in the toilet, even though you know I don't do that sort of thing!" Noah grinned at that, completely unabashed, "And you were quite a nuisance in general!" Kurt concluded,
"Hey, I just did what any good husband would do when he sees the love of his life about to go down for smothering someone with a pillow!" Noah defended himself reasonably, before leaning to press his forehead against Kurt's, "And I will get you to have plane sex with me someday!"
"Dream on, babe." Kurt nipped at Noah's lip, ever since their marriage, Noah's been obsessed with the idea of getting Kurt to join the 'Mile high club' despite Kurt's objections. There was just something so hot in the idea of having Kurt to fuck on the clock, it was better than photocopying your butt in the office Christmas party!
"Oh, come on, everyone else on that flight was doing it." He pointed out to Kurt, who looked far from being impressed,
"So, not only do you find this hideous shoebox romantic you also want us to have sex on surfaces that at least two other couples soiled and polluted with their bodily fluids?" Noah could see his argument running away, but he gave it one last valiant effort,
"Where's your sense of adventure?"
"Beaten to a pulp by my sense of personal hygiene and my airplane bathroom claustrophobia." Kurt replied dryly, dragging a surprised laugh from his husband.
"Gods, I missed you." He practically growled, pulling the grinning Kurt into another soul stealing kiss, and it was a real shame that Kurt wasn't open to the idea of bathroom sex in general, because there was one not very far and damn that was going to be one hell of a long ride home!
"Missed you too, babe." Kurt panted as they surfaced back for air. Sliding his hand to tangle their fingers together he started pulling Noah behind him, suddenly all the more eager to get out of there and get Noah to their bed!
..oo00oo.. ..oo00oo.. ...oo00oo.. ..oo00oo...
THE END
A/N: Thanks for reading, hope you liked it. I'd love to hear from you.