Not sure how I feel about this one. Hoe well. Enjoy.

Em, KayNicole, 1 Crazy Brunette Goddess, StoryLover82, MissAmieB, and DeeMarie426 are all so lovely, and they leave me fabulous reviews!

2 weeks pass quickly and I stay on the road with the roster. Everyone could tell I was detached and unfocused. Word had gotten around that my mother was dying and I constantly got nice words from people I never even talked to.

My mom would call everyday around the same time to assure me she was alright. Every night I went to bed with a nagging feeling that I was not in the right place. Just the thought that my mother was miles away from me and dying was nerve wracking. I almost had panic attacks every time she called even a minute past her normal time.

Dean had been my rock for the past two weeks. Usually, I would get off the phone with my mother crying because I could hear how sick she was, Dean would immediately come over to me and hold me until my crying subsided. He knew how hard it was on me.

As much as I hated to admit it, it was affecting my work. Each night when I was supposed to be ring side and getting great pictures I was always getting distracted. Thankfully, Stephanie was aware of what was going on so she wasn't too hard on me. But I knew what I had to do.

"Dean." I say over dinner one night.

"Yeah?"

"I think I need to go home for a while." The thought had been on my mind for a while. It would give me time to spend with my mother.

"Do you think Stephanie would allow it?" He asks curiously.

"I don't know, I don't plan on just leaving work for a while. I would give the photographing job to someone else, and then I would just have them send the pictures to me so I could edit them. It would allow me to work from home, but still get paid."

Making sure I had enough money was going to be an issue. When the inevitable happened I would have to plan and pay for the funeral. Luckily, I got paid more than enough to handle the costs. I just wished I could've have used the money differently.

"I doubt she'd care." He says with a sad smile. I knew was he also preparing for the worst.

"I think I'm going to surprise my mom though."

"Sounds like a great idea. I'll make sure to visit you guys when we're close enough."

I smile at him once more. "Thanks so much for being so supportive, Dean. It means a lot to me."

"Don't mention it. You need all the support you get; I know this is hard on you."

I say nothing to him in return. I just go over to him and hug him.

~x~

The next afternoon, after a short meeting with Stephanie, I was boarding the next plane to Stamford, Connecticut.

Dean came to see me off. Even though many others had said goodbye to me before I left.

"I wish I could be there with you."

"I do too, but you have to work. I can understand that, my mother will too."

"Make sure to tell her, I'll visit."

"I will," I laugh "She really took a liking to you."

"Well, I mean who wouldn't?" He says shrugging his shoulders.

"You're such a goof."

"Maybe." He says smirking at me.

"I love you, Dean." I say wrapping my arms around his neck.

"Love you too, Sunshine." He says back.

We stood embracing each other for a while until my plane was called for boarding. Dean and I said our goodbyes and I left him to board the plane. The 6 hour flight was going to be lovely.

~x~

I arrive at my old house around 7 with dinner in my hands.

"Mom?" I call opening the door with the house key that I luckily still had.

"Eleanor? What are you doing here?" My eyes widen as I take in her appearance. She was still skinny, but she was swollen in some places. She was also using a cane to support her when she walked.

"I thought it would be best to stay with you." I say with a sad smile placing the food on the coffee table in the living room.

"I appreciate that darling, I do, but what about work?"

"I have the job of editing every picture, so I can work from home." I say smiling. Why wasn't she happy?

"I don't want you to be here just because I'm dying, Eleanor." She says shaking her head.

"I thought…that you would be happy to see me." I say dejectedly.

"I am, but-"

"No, Mom, no buts. I'm here now, and I'm going to stay here. Just let me spend as much time as I can with you."

"…okay." She settles.

And the conversation is left at that.

~x~

2 months seem to pass in the blink of an eye. I spend all waking moments with my mother and I do anything and everything I can for her. It was a change of pace compared to when I wanted nothing to do with her.

In the past 2 months I had learned more about my mother than I did in the 26 years of my life. She also taught me a lot about my father. I learned that I had gotten my looks from my mother, but my personality and mannerisms were completely from my father.

She had also told me how they had met. It was the cutest thing I had ever heard. My dad was in a local rock band –I wasn't aware of that either- and my mom was an interviewer for a local music magazine. They met, bonded over music, and fell in love. I couldn't help but notice the similarities between their first meeting and how Dean and I met.

Dean was also a topic that came up daily with my mother. She never failed to tell me how much she loved him, and how happy she was that I was happy.

"You know there's only one thing I'm disappointed that I won't get to see." My mom said to me over her bowl of soup.

"Only one? What would that be?" I ask curiously. I would've thought she would've missed a lot more.

"Yeah, only one," She sighs before taking a sip of the broth left over from her soup "I won't get to see the children you and Dean make."

I almost spit my soup all over her. "What?" I sputter.

"You'd have beautiful children. His blue eyes and your hair and mouth. Cutest damn children ever." She states openly.

"Mom!"

"What darling? I'm just stating the truth." She says harmlessly.

"Yeah, yeah I know."

"You can't honestly tell me you haven't thought of a future with Dean. He loves you a lot, and you love him. Don't let that go to waste. Your father and I got married as soon as possible. I never regretted it."

"I mean, yeah, I've thought about it." I say with a small shrug.

"Have you ever talked about it?"

"Not really, we talked about weddings once."

"oooh, explain." She says prying for details. I quickly explain to her the conversation we had at the bar all those months ago, and she listens on excitedly.

"Darling, whether you want a big wedding or not, you need to marry that piece of ass."

"Mom! Oh my god." My eyes widen, as I pick up our bowls and put them in the sink to hide my blushing face. Even sober my mother had no couth.

"What? I'm just being honest. The sex must-"

"Mom!" I yelp once again. This conversation needed to end.

"Oh, alright, Elly-Belly. I'll shut up. I'm tired anyway, I'm going to bed." She says with a smile before starting up the stairs.

"Love you, Mom!"

"Love you too, Darling."

I sigh softly to myself. Maybe I should've tried to reconnect with my mother before now. It was a shame that it took her impending death for me to make amends.

~x~

During the third month, I'm able to watch my mother get increasingly worse. Her lymph nodes were incredibly swollen, and she could hardly walk. I knew it wouldn't be too much longer.

I was proven correct when she demanded I take her to the hospital one morning. She wouldn't even let me call 911.

When we got finally got there, they immediately emitted her to the hospital, and they hooked her up to all kind of machines.

When her doctor had finally gotten to the hospital he explained what was going on. Fluid was filling my mother's legs and it was prohibiting her from being able to move. The chemotherapy she had, had pushed the cancer into her kidneys and they were shutting down. The doctor said if she happened to make it through the night they would put her on dialysis. In his eyes, I could tell that he didn't think it was going to happen.

The next few hours had passed, and I hadn't managed to call Dean and let him know about Mom being hospitalized. All I did was hold her hand and sit by her bed. She tried to keep up a normal conversation, but I could tell how much pain she was in. It broke my heart. She even had that particular sounding death rattle. I didn't think the tears welling in my eyes had fallen yet, I promised not to let them fall in front of her

"Mom," I say softly, I continue when she turns her head towards me in acknowledgement "I'm going to call Dean. I'll be back shortly." Being in a different room from her would also allow me to shed some tears.

She says nothing and only nods at me. It must've hurt to speak.

I dial Dean's number as soon as I'm out the door, and he picks up on the second ring.

"Hello?" He answers.

"Dean…" I respond shakily.

"Elle? What's going on? Are you alright?"

"It's Mom…I think this might be it." I say, feeling a few tears fall.

"I'm on my way." He says hurriedly. I didn't focus on how long it would take him to get to the hospital. I knew I had to get back in there with my mom. I make sure to wipe my tears before going back into the room; some of the nurses send me sympathetic looks. They knew this was it too.

"Eleanor?" My mother asks with a raspy voice after a few moments.

"Yeah, mom?"

"You forgive me for all those horrible things I did and said to you, don't you?"

"Yes, yes, of course I do." I say nodding frantically.

"I love you so much, darling."

"I love you too, Mom." I say, feeling tears start to fall. Was she saying goodbye?

"Don't forget me, Darling."

"Never, Mom." By this point I was sobbing silently, and shaking violently.

"Can you do one more thing for me, Elly-Belly?"

"Anything, Mom."

"Get yourself some help, please. I mean that in the nicest way. Don't let your anorexia rule you anymore. Become the confident, beautiful women I know you can be. Can you promise me that?"

"Yes, I promise." I say.

There's a long silence.

"Richard…" She mutters quietly.

"What?" I was more than confused by my mother muttering my father's name.

"I'm ready, Richard."

I stay silent until I feel her hand go limp in my own. I let a shrill scream out due the immediate feeling of my heart breaking. I watch as the nurses' rush in. I try to get my legs to move but they stay still. I knew this was going to happen, so why did it hurt so badly? I had a fleeting wish that I hadn't gotten closer with my mother so it would've softened the blow. I literally felt like someone had punched me in the gut several times. Is this how my mother had felt once my father passed away? The feeling had to go away.

My mother was pronounced dead at 6:09 PM on October 6th, 2013.

By 8:30, Dean had managed to make it to the hospital. I could see how heartbroken he was when he realized he was too late.

He had gotten to me to the house after finishing things at the hospital. My crying hadn't stopped yet, and I didn't think it ever would.

"Sunshine…" He coaxes "You want to go to bed or do you want to talk?"

"I rather sleep." I say quietly.

He nods at me, and helps me as I numbly climb up the stairs. I'm grateful when he helps me change into my pajamas; I was in too much of a daze to function. He even tucks me in like a child before laying behind me and wrapping his arms around my waist.

"It'll all be okay, Elle." He whispers into my ear.

"I hope so, Dean. I really do." I whisper back, before falling asleep.