Last Stand

Post 'The Cricket Game'. The battle for Storybrooke has begun and the Evil Queen is staying out of it. Do the Charmings and their allies have any hope of defeating Cora? Will a certain little boy be able to convince his mom to join the fight? What will the true cost of victory be?

Disclaimer: I do not own.

A/N: This story was originally supposed to be a one-shot, and this part was the main idea of my initial inspiration. Somehow though, don't ask me how cuz I have no idea, it spiraled into a much longer piece that is going to be three parts. I have no idea how I feel about it now and I should really be working on S&W instead, but I just felt the need to post it-if only so that I'll stop obsessing over it.

Here's hoping it doesn't suck. ;)

-x-x-x-x-x-

Chapter One

An epic battle raged on all through the town; Good vs Evil. And for once Regina, former Evil Queen, former Mayor, had no part in it. She stood on the sidelines and watched. Watched as the town she had created was slowly destroyed, piece by piece. Watched as Snow White and her allies battled Cora and her army.

She looked out from her bedroom window, surveying the conflict.

So far the contest seemed fairly evenly matched. She watched everything that was happening with an unusual detachment. In fact, Regina had been numb for the last few weeks, ever since she'd absorbed the green lightning from the well. She couldn't find the energy to care about much of anything because once again she had saved someone's—two someones'—lives and where had it gotten her? Alone.

Perhaps she should be glad that alone was all she had gotten instead of the death of her love and a forced marriage. After the incident with Archie, she had retreated into hiding, and when her mother had come looking for her, Regina had sent her away. It had not taken long to conclude who could have set her up. She knew Cora expected her to give in like she always did, but Cora had failed to consider something. Regina was old.

Regina was so much older than the Queen that had sent Hook, than the young bride who had sent her through the mirror, than the girl who promised she would be good. Cora had been frozen for the last 28 years, so had almost everyone—except Regina. Regina remembered all those years. And there hadn't been that much to do besides think.

Regina had thought about her mother when she believed her deceased, because that freed her from some of the pain that came whenever she thought of her mother. Although even then she had still known it was likely Cora was still alive because this was her mother and she always won, always came back. Henry's words echoed in her head, "Good always wins". Is that why she had always lost to her mother? Because she had never been good? What was the outcome when both in the battle were evil?

Regardless, it was here, in this new world that she had slowly learned that most parents, most mothers, were very different for her own. She had noticed how most acted in public of course—how her own mother acted in public—but she had thought that in private they were all like her mother as well. She had been surprised that with Snow it wasn't like that but she assumed it was because Snow was a princess, was royalty.

However, she discovered that was not true. The idea that her mother had not just been a cruel person, but also a cruel mother, was something she had never fully let herself consider. She had had no idea what to do with that knowledge. She had always blamed herself for her struggles with her mother. She was a bad daughter, she didn't fully appreciate what her mother did for her, she was selfish for putting her strange, weak desires above her mother's plans—plans that were in fact in her own best interests.

This change in world view, that it might not have been her that was the problem, came on gradually as she took advantage of the truly astonishing amount of information available in this world. Despite the previous method of thinking embedded in her psyche, she was able to slowly let her obligation and need for her mother's approval, her desire to be a good daughter and love her mother, fall to the side. It was easier to tell herself that since her mother was gone it was safe to allow herself to think such things over.

Regina had discovered that she hated her mother. She hated what she had done to her, mentally, emotionally, physically. The things she would say haunted her to this day and often she could still feel the sting of the magic as Cora had wielded it against her young daughter, all in the name of her so called love. The way Cora had manipulated and used her to further her own ends, with no regard for Regina's own feelings and wishes.

Yet, even with all that, Regina still loved her mother too. She couldn't help it. It was confusing and tangled, as her emotions almost always were, and so she decided to put it such thoughts away, after all they shouldn't matter anymore. Here, in this new world without magic, she felt safe.

Then her son had awoken from his nightmare and she had found herself in her own. To hear him say that her mother was alive and Regina knew beyond a doubt that meant she was coming. Coming for her, coming to take away of everything she love—it was only a matter of time.

So all those half formed thoughts had come rushing back, demanding to be dealt with. How was she going to react when she came? Love? Hate? Acceptance? Refusal? Submission?

She hadn't really known herself until her mother had come knocking at her door and Regina could feel that love and that hate swirl together to make a sort of armor, covered with a sheen of numbness that she'd allowed to infect her.

She had stared blankly as her mother tried to apologize, tried to say she was sorry for what she had done. But she made a fatal mistake and apologized for the wrong thing. So Regina sent her away.

She knew Cora was waiting, figuring it was only a matter of time before Regina would come back to her.

She never would. Her mother died years ago.

Something from the present caught her attention, dragging her from her constantly circling thoughts of the past. She narrowed her eyes, magic enabling her see far more than a normal person could. Someone was coming up her road. The battle wasn't to her doorstep and yet someone was coming. Who could this scout be?

Then she got that familiar feeling and she knew. Henry.

-/-

She opened her front door just as he made his way up the path. "Henry. You should be someplace safe." Her voice was calm and steady, as if people weren't fighting in the streets.

Henry panted at the bottom of the steps, thrown off by the way she had just appeared—after weeks of not being able to seeing her—and the way she was acting as if he were merely home in the middle of the day when he should be in school, like everything was normal. She looked okay, like she always did, and yet… There was something missing in her eyes. He had a sinking feeling it was his fault. "I'm sorry," he blurted out.

Regina's eyebrows rose, "What for?"

"For Archie. For not visiting you even after you saved them. For not trying harder to find you when I found out the truth. For not believing in you," he listed, staring at the ground, ashamed.

Regina blinked at her son, suddenly hit by a memory of the same boy, four years old, earnestly apologizing for coloring on the wall. A wave of warmth pulsed out from her heart, sending a shockwave through the numbness that had become a part of her in the last couple of weeks. "That's alright, Henry. Anyone would have believed. Everyone did."

His head shot up, obviously not expecting that response. He frowned. "But…"

"Where are you supposed to be?" she interrupted as if he hadn't started to speak. "Surely, they must have put you in safe place." A hint of disapproval coming into her tone—the only inflection she'd had the entire conversation.

Still, it made Henry feel better because it made her sound more like his mom and not this blank stranger. "I'm supposed to be at Granny's, in the basement. But I wanted to help," he continued.

Regina almost shook her head, of course he did. Honestly, what were they thinking not locking the door? Another pulse shot through her. She frowned now, "Henry, you are only a boy."

"I know!" Henry said, stomping his foot. "But I can't just sit here! It's all my fault!"

That knocked out a good amount of the cotton that had been muffling her from everything. She crouched down, "What? No. I have no idea why you think that, but that is not true. At all." Her voice firm, leaving no room for argument.

Not that that stopped Henry. "But it is! If I hadn't tried to get Emma and break the curse, then none of this would be happening!"

"Oh, Henry," Regina said sadly. "You can't think like that. What about Gold bringing magic here? Or me for cursing everyone? No. This battle is the fault only of Cora and the ones with her who are attacking."

Henry couldn't help the relief that flooded through him at such a sure response to his fears. He hadn't told anyone else what he was thinking, and he still felt partly responsible, but having his mom tell him it wasn't his fault made him feel a whole lot better. "I just….I'm so worried someone's going to—to—to die!"

Regina didn't know how to respond because most likely someone was. This was war. People die in wars, she knew at least a few people had to have already. She had hoped her son would never know such things. This world was so much safer in that way. The sounds of the battle were growing closer, a loud roar making mother and son jump.

"What if something happens to Emma or Miss Blanchard or Gramps or Ruby or—" he cut himself off, nearly in tears. "I only just found them…" his voice was so quiet.

Regina wanted to reach out and touch him—give him a hug, fix his hair, put a hand on his shoulder, but she didn't think she was wanted and she didn't think she could take the rebuff she would surely receive without the blissful numbness. So she merely looked at him with sorrow in her eyes.

"Why are you here?" Regina asked softly. "Henry, why did you leave your safe place and come here?"

"I—" Henry looked a little guilty. "I wanted to see if you were helping your mom," he confessed. Regina automatically stiffened. She knew it wasn't intended as an accusation, but it felt like one. Some of the numbness crept back. "We hadn't been able to find you since you argued with Emma and her parents and then Cora was here and…I was worried that's why we couldn't find you."

Regina remembered standing in her foyer as her door bell rang. Mother and son at her door, both trying to talk to her. They'd come to the house a couple times this week and the one before, once they'd found Archie safe. She knew they were trying to apologize—she didn't even really blame them for believing—her mother had wanted them to and she always gets what she wants.

She'd held off the cursed dust, kept it small and contained. The effort had made her ache and messed with her sleep, but at that point she'd rather have physical side-effects than mental ones. But even with that in mind, the numbness that had begun creeping into her veins against her will, and when Emma and the two idiots had come to her home, accusing her… When she had thrown Emma across her yard and disappeared in a puff of magic, it finally took root. She'd stopped fighting it after that. Magical numbness was better than the stinging betrayal of what Emma had yelled and the sharp pain of watching her spread the lie to Henry. There was too much of it and perhaps the numbness would help when her mother finally came for her.

And so when they came she was numb enough, had just enough unjustified disappointment in both of them and hurt from both of their harsh words, to stay where she was. It didn't stop her from watching them leave though.

Emma had even come a couple of other times—without Henry. Sometimes she would bang loudly on the door and shout. Other times she had just sat on Regina's steps, drinking coffee and talking quietly—as if she knew Regina could hear her. Perhaps she did; maybe she too could tell when Regina was close the way the brunette could feel Emma. Just their magic interacting with each other, of course, she told herself.

Surprisingly, it was those times, when the blonde was alone, that Regina most wanted to open the door. She didn't know what to do with that. Especially since by then the numbness completely pervaded her being. It was only those few times it receded slightly, like short breathes of air before she would plunge back under the ice. A lot of the time, she wouldn't even talk about anything particularly poignant, normally it was just about how Henry was, sometimes how her own day had gone or possible trouble stirred up by Cora.

When she was alone her thoughts took a very internal turn. They seemed to keep her locked in the past, reliving her life, affecting even her present life as she barely ate and slept far longer than she ever had in the past—perhaps because the numb kept away the nightmares more effectively than anything else had. Her interest in daily life faded as she spent her days alone in her house, staring into a fire in her study contemplating things like; why was she still even here?

Was she just a ghost like her mother—someone who should be dead?

Henry's voice jolted her back to the present, "Emma didn't think you were. She said you were just keeping to yourself, cuz you were angry and hurt." Regina stared at him, surprised not so much at Emma's understanding, but that she had told this to Henry. The idea of anyone talking her up to her son, or at least not disparaging her, giving an explanation for her behavior that wasn't 'because she's evil', was a shock. She supposed she wasn't surprised at the words themselves because, when they tried, the Evil Queen and the Savior had always understood each other more than anyone else. "I hoped she was right. I'm glad she was right." He said the last part resolutely and then gave her a hopeful smile, "Because if you're not on Cora's side then you must be on our side. And that means you can help fight her!"

Regina stared at him. So that's why he had come. To ask her to save his family, his real family. "I thought you didn't want me to use magic."

Henry shook his head, "Not if you use it for good. Like at the well. What could be more good than saving the town?" He faltered slightly, as if remembering the gravity of the situation, that this wasn't just a story. That this was real life. "Please, Mom?"

Her breath caught in her throat at the word. Did he know how much that word meant to her? Was he just trying to manipulate her? He was looking at her so earnestly, so full of hope, she knew what she was going to do. Anything that could make her son look at her like she was his hero again—that wasn't even a choice. Still, she needed to know, the numbness requesting this one question, how far should she go?

"Do you love me?" she asked, her voice steady and calm.

Henry pulled his head back at the unexpected question and he furrowed his brow. What did that have to do with anything? "Wha…?" Then a loud sound distracted him, the fighting was getting closer and he felt fear race through him. He turned back to his mom urgently.

She had a strange look on her face.

One of the arguments she had been caught between with regards to her mother, after she had gotten Henry, had been two conflicting absolute truths. One was that as a mother, she could never imagine doing to Henry what her mother had done to her—the very idea made her physically ill to even hypothetically contemplate such a thing. That meant her mother couldn't have loved her, because you can't do that to someone you love.

On the other hand, as a mother, she couldn't think of a single thing Henry could ever do that would make her stop loving him. That meant her mother had to love her.

And as she turned this over in her mind until she came to the inevitable conclusion, one that Henry had just unwittingly confirmed. It was her—she was unlovable.

It explained why her mother could never love her, despite being a mother herself and thinking it would be impossible not to love her child, and why Henry didn't love her, despite being a daughter and loving her own mother even with all she had done to me.

She nodded at that theory having been proven true. "That's alright. I expected as much." Henry's face scrunched up in confusion. She leaned forward and kissed him lightly on the forehead. He felt a strange warmth and a tingle as magic covered him in a protective shield. "I love you, Henry, no matter what you feel."

Henry stared at her in confusion, still surprised at the magic before his mind caught up with her words. Wait, no. She'd gotten it wrong. He opened his mouth to tell her so, but she stood up, her face going from a heartbroken mother to a Queen, ready to defend her kingdom. "That should protect you, but you should stay here until this is all over."

"No, wait—" he tried to tell her, but she held up a hand as she stood next to him.

"I need to concentrate, Henry." Regina closed her eyes and reached deep inside to find her magic. She'd hidden it, to resist the temptation to use it after that scene in her front yard. The cursed fairydust had curled around it, not able to destroy it, but drawn to it all the same.

Now she called it back to her. It had been waiting for her, growing—rejoicing in coming home to her after so long an absence. The power swirled together, numbness and rage mixing. When her eyes opened, one was purple and the other neon green. Henry gaped when she looked down at him. "Goodbye."

And Regina disappeared in crack of green lightning, purple smoke drifting aimlessly where she'd been. Henry stared at the spot in shock, before once more disregarding orders and taking off to find his mom.

-x-x-x-x-x-

A/N: Like I said, there will be 2 more chapters because it ended up like quadrupling in length and I don't know if I split it up well but I just don't know what to do with it anymore. I just hope it holds together.

Let me know what you think. Thanks for reading.