To Die For

What does it mean when someone says 'I love you'? How far would you go for love, for control? What if you had everything you ever wanted taken from you in an instant? Would you break, or would you build yourself up again? Learn the meaning of the words 'to die for' in this story of love, lust, hope, family and betrayal.

This was originally planned as a one-shot, then it turned into a short story, now it's turned into a two/three arc drama. If all goes as planned, I will be able to give back to the community that gives me so much joy. A beta would be much appreciated, if anyone out there is up to it.

You know those stories where an Autobot and a Decepticon fall in love and it's all good? This isn't one of them. Don't expect a happy romance between Starscream and Arcee. Don't really expect a true romance at all. Maybe later on I could do something nice (and fluffy) between these two, but for this story they will not be on good terms, for soon to be obvious reasons. It's also extremely alternate universe/reality/timeline.

Disclaimer: Transformers belongs to Hasbro/Takara Tomy.

Warnings: Non-con merging. This will stand for many a chapter.

[~]

Tighten your tie, boy
You're something to die for
But don't hold your breath now
You're just killing time
Tonight you can dream, boy
Imagine a whisper
If you can keep secrets
Then I'll tell you mine

- "To Die For," The Birthday Massacre

[~]

Chapter I: Me and a Con

They had been on a scouting mission alone in the canyons of Sierra, Nevada. Just her and Bumblebee, patrolling the rocky landscape at five in the morning on a Friday. It was nothing special, nothing out of the ordinary. It had been done dozens of times before on many occasions.

Arcee moved the energon scanner away from a cleft in the rocks as they came to a fork in their route. She turned her head and smiled at the yellow mech. "What do you think, Bumblebee? I'll check out the left and you'll check out the right."

{Sure thing, Arcee.} he responded, and they departed into their respective directions. Out of the corner of each other's optics they saw the other disappear behind the sienna rock. It never once crossed their minds that this would be the last they would see of each other for a long time.

As Arcee walked she glided the tips of her fingers across the rough formation and smiled. Could it ever truly replace Cybertron? No, not really. Nothing ever could hope to replicate the sights of their home world. But she and the rest of her kind could adapt. This world held ancient secrets and unbound organic beauty. It was remarkable. Another quick flurry of fingers across the datapad and she continued on.

The scanner went haywire as she moved closer. Finally, some energon! From the way the device was acting, it looked as if they had more than enough for all five of them. It seemed too good to be true.

When she came upon the cache, her Spark skipped a few beats with joy. It was huge! Before her was an entire sea of energon just waiting to be harvested. Arcee knelt down to inspect it, to feel it in her hands. She placed the scanner close to her as she picked up a sizeable chunk of energon. The blue crystal was warm and heavy in her palm; familiar and so wonderful to behold. This was going to solve their fuel problem for quite some time.

Now, she thought half jokingly, how shall I cook you? Shall I make you into a soup? Or maybe I could turn you into a drink? Nah, I think you could make a nice set of ammunition.

Arcee stood, the crystal still in her hand as she began to look it over. It was perfect. Today was a very, very good day.

"Bumblebee, you won't believe the size of—"

She stopped cold as her optics caught something amongst the crystals, something that was purposefully placed in sight of the poor bot that happened to come upon it.

A high powered stunner!

With a small click it went off, sending wave after wave of disabling energy. The force of the stunner was incredible: the deafening high-pitched scream echoed in her mind and turned all thoughts into unintelligible mush. The world spun around her at a nauseating pace that was surely going to knock her off her pedes.

She opened her mouth in a futile attempt to call for help, only to have slurred, half-formed words and groans the only thing she could manage. Her knees finally gave out, and with a heavy thunk she collapsed painfully onto the hard, rocky ground.

The last thing Arcee saw before she slipped into oblivion—optics unfocused, mind a disorientated mess and limbs unresponsive—were five Eradicons steadily approaching her.

Oh, Primus…no….

Arcee regained consciousness slowly and painfully. She still felt the disorientating effects of the stunner buzzing in her neural network, making her vision blurry and her senses dulled. All she could see was grayish purple and all she could hear were the clinking of chains. Was she hallucinating? Maybe she was, but the sore feeling in her arms was very real. Probably from recharging on it wrong. A good stretch would pop the everything back into place and—

….wait…

She couldn't move her arms.

That horrifying fact made her lucid enough to realize where she was. No, she wasn't hallucinating. Both of her arms were tightly braided with chains that hung from the ceiling, suspending her some feet off the ground, and her legs were also bound with the same biting metal. All too quickly cold panic began to creep into her circuits and fear ran rampant in her Spark. A hundred horrible scenes flashed through her mind and nearly threw her into a panic.

No. Enough.

Arcee took a deep intake and exhaled. Panicking and struggling won't get her out of this scenario; she needed to stay calm. Best thing she can do is analyze the place and figure out where she is, try to .comm Ratchet or anyone else for assistance in get the frag out of here. There. Problem solved. Then they can laugh about it and kick more Decepticon aft.

She heard a door slide open with a hiss, and Arcee offlined her optics, going limp. Best to let them think she was still unconscious.

She heard the slow and calculated click-clack of sharp pedes against the floor with each step the Decepticon took, encircling her like a deranged predator. It walked around her twice before stopping dead in front of her. Two long fingers curled underneath Arcee's chin and turned her head to the side, examining her face. Gah, those fingertips were sharp! Why were Decepticons so infatuated with talons? As it turned her head one last time, she felt the Decepticon lean in so close she could smell the faint scent of polish.

A low voice whispered, "I know you are awake, Arcee."

Slowly she onlined her optics, coming face to face with—

"Starscream." she murmured. "What a surprise."

The Air Commander just smirked. "No, not when you really think about it." He slid his fingers away from her chin and rested a hand on her side. "I think this is long overdue, to be quite honest."

Long overdue? Arcee's eyes narrowed at him. "What are you talking about?"

"Oh, just talking aloud." He said, "but tell me, Arcee: did you like the little surprise I left for you?"

It was a trap this whole time. Damn it! I knew it…I knew it was too good.

"Such a nice supply of energon we laid out for you, don't you think? That's enough to fuel a few dozen soldiers for months. Honestly I never thought my plan would go as perfectly as I envisioned it, but the universe does favor those who persist."

"Where am I? And where is Bumblebee?"

He chuckled and stepped back to spread his arms in a show of mock hospitality, "Welcome back to the Nemesis, Arcee. More specifically, the brig. You remember it, don't you? I do hope you will enjoy your stay."

She snorted and rolled her eyes. "I plan not to."

"You don't have a choice. And you needn't worry about your young friend; I had and will continue to have no use for him. It's only you."

If the laws of nature shaped itself according to the whims of Arcee's thoughts, the chains would've magically disappeared right about then and she would've had the chance to slash that grin right off his face. Unfortunately for her, reality did not work that way; the chains remained and so did Starscream's loathsome arrogance. All the warrior could do was continue to hang there and size her captor up.

She couldn't help but notice that Starscream looked…better than he usually did, as if he was preparing to go to a gala. His body was shining in the dim lights, each and every part of him a near reflective surface. "I see you got yourself all buffed for the occasion. I don't know why though, since taking an Autobot prisoner hardly calls for it." I bet you do it to stroke your massive ego. You always have to look as magnificent as you think you feel.

Starscream looked himself over as if to confirm her words. "Do you like it, Arcee? You should be extremely flattered. I went through all the trouble of making myself presentable just for you."

"How nice." I don't like where this is going. "So what do you want? Co-ordinates? Plans? Location to the Autobot base? Interrogate me all you like, but I won't tell you a damn thing. You're wasting your time."

Starscream gave her a curious look, the kind one would give to an astoundingly silly question, and chuckled through a wide smile. The sound of his laughter send a chill though Arcee's Spark.

"I'm not here to interrogate you, femme." He purred smoothly. "I'm here to take."

In the blink of an eye his lips were upon hers, both hands possessively gripping her hips. Arcee's optics widened with shock, and for a moment her thoughts came to a screeching halt. The femme's Spark fluttered spastically when she felt Starscream's glossa wrap around her own. That was enough to jump kick her brain into action. She let out a furious growl and bit him. Hard.

The Decepticon barked in pain, stepping back and wiping energon from his lips. He stared at his indigo-stained fingertips and a wicked glint came into his eye. "You sure do know how to drive a mech wild, don't you?"

Arcee snarled, "Stay. Away. From me."

"Oh, but I have. For too long I have." He approached her again, dipping one long talon under her chin to force eye contact. Small rivulets of his blood trickled out as spoke, "You have been on my mind for quite some time, Arcee. You might even call it an obsession. I find you to be completely irresistible."

She looked at him in incredulously, "What?"

"You haven't noticed all your fetching qualities? Tenacity. Strength. Confidence. Independence. Beauty," his grin became lecherous as he continued. "And I cannot resist a pretty face for too long."

Arcee scoffed, "Oh, please. There are plenty of mechs and femmes with those exact traits. Don't try and sweet talk me into telling you anything; I promise you it won't work."

He placed a greedy hand on her breastplate and whispered, "Well, I must then try harder, my darling."

Her head snapped back and her face contorted into an appalled grimace. Arcee gathered a ball of oral lubricant in her mouth and spat it squarely between his optics. He hissed in disgust and furiously wiped it away.

"I won't let you have me." It was an empty threat at most. She had nowhere to go and no way to fight back, but Arcee would be damned if she gave him any sort of satisfaction.

With a primal growl he gripped her neck and jammed some sort of torture device into it, the object sending a powerful electric shock through her systems; not enough to paralyze or do serious damage, but there was a sharp sensation that echoed though her body. Arcee winced, but did not utter a sound. He would have to do better than that.

Starscream asked mockingly, "Did that hurt?"

"What…was that for…?"

"Since I knew that I would have a hard time convincing you to open up willing, I took it upon myself to do us both a favor and loosened up your breastplate."

How dare you!

"Now…let u see what you've been hiding from me." Immediately his hands went to work, manually separating the plating that covered her Spark chamber. Arcee shrieked from the initial touch, but raw anger quickly replaced fright. No one touched her like this. She jerked about screaming, "NO! Stop! Get your filthy hands off of me! Get away from me, you creep!"

For a blessed moment he paused, if only to steady her – how could he work when his darling was wiggling about? "Awww, what's the matter, Arcee? Afraid that Starscream is going to hurt you? Terrified that I will find your precious bondmark and scratch it out to replace it with my own? Or…is there another reason?"

She stiffened at Starscream's words and her optics dimmed, but she spat out, "Or! It could be that I don't want your filthy servos on me."

"Is that all it is, Arcee?...Well? I can tell I hit a nerve. Answer me; I'm going to find out either way. Am I even going to find a bondmark?"

She spat out, "None of your business, 'con."

"It is my business now. If you have nothing to hide, why don't you just tell me?

The delicious realization struck him head on.

"Ohhh…I see…" He nuzzled the side of her helm and hissed into an audio, "You're untouched, aren't you?"

She didn't need to say anything; a small hiss in his direction and a turn of the head spoke for her. He cackled with twisted anticipation as he stroked his thumb across her quivering lip plates.

"You should be so honored to have me as your first." Oh, now this was a wonderful turn of events. Previously he was under the assumption that she had someone, and he had planned to take whoever that was out of the picture. But here she was: vestal and his for the taking. Perfect.

He separated one last plate and she was bare before him. Instinct demanded that she cross her arms over her chest in a form of modesty, but the tangled chains would not allow that luxury. His hungry optics shamelessly took in the view of her naked Spark chamber.

"Ahhh, there we go. How lovely." Starscream's mouth practically watered at the sight. Just as he suspected, there was no bondmark to be had—she looked far more attractive without one—and her Spark was a gorgeous light blue, the clear sign of an unbounded Cybrtronian. He grazed the razor-edge of his talon against the delicate Spark chamber and the wires therein. Such a breath-taking sight before him.

"Don't."

Starscream looked up, "What was that?"

"Please. Please don't." Arcee nearly sobbed the words out. She should be stronger than this, damn it! She shouldn't be reduced to pitifully begging for mercy, especially since she expected none. But the azure femme couldn't help herself. "Yo-you don't have to do this. You really don't. Please, for Primus' sake don't do this—" He suddenly gripped her chin by the thumb and forefinger and looked deeply into her optics, straight into her soul.

"But Arcee," his voice was eerily cloying. "Why would I not? I have wanted this for a very, very long time. I think that my patience should be rewarded a thousand-fold, don't you think?"

She shook her head slightly; whether it was at the question or in disbelief at her situation he did not know, but he couldn't deny how pretty she looked when fear danced upon her features.

"That's where you are wrong, darling: I deserve this."

He retracted his own chest plating to expose his beating Spark (blue, vibrant, ready) and stepped forward to claim what had always been rightfully his.

"N-no! No! NO! NO! NO!" She trashed in her bonds in a desperate attempt to try and weaken the strong chains that restrained her, though no amount of fighting could break them. His grin grew to be psychotic, his red-within-red eyes danced wildly. This…this was really happening. This monster was going to have his way with her, and there was nothing she could do to stop him…

During the days of the War Arcee had heard awful, disturbing stories of poor mechs and femmes who had been captured by the Decepticons and taken against their will. Many of those POWs were never seen again, either killed or truly bonded to their merciless captors. The few who managed to escape were never the same again, and she considered herself truly lucky that she had never been in that situation.

This was more than just a bitter quirk of fate.

She watched with horrified optics, her neural network howling, as their Sparks met, tendrils of light tangling themselves together in an ethereal waltz. Her own shriek was nearly drowned out by Starscream's loud moaning. In seconds Arcee felt every bit of him invade every bit of her, his Spark an overwhelming force that she had no defenses against. He wrapped those long, thin arms around her body and crushed her tightly to his chest.

Starscream's head tilted back with heady bliss. "I've missed this so much…!"

It has been far too long. He hasn't felt the sweet ecstasy of another's Spark near his for hundreds upon hundreds of years. This was like an injection of fresh energon into his system, a fresh intake of clean oxygen. Her Spark was pure and ripe for his taking; it was the ultimate expression of his claim on her. And oh, how she struggled. So much fight in such a small body! It both amused and aroused him to the point of near madness. and before surging against her and shuddered when her own Spark instinctively did the same.

The new, unfamiliar sensation, this unrelenting pleasure was being sent through her frame with each spark-to-spark caress. In one final futile attempt she gasped out, "Ge-get out of me! Let me go—" only to be silenced by a skilled lick of energy to a pleasure node.

"Never." He breathed. Never never never…

Oh, Primus…this was a nightmare. She couldn't believe it, even as it was happening to her. It was so surreal, almost lasting a horrid eternity

Heat soon built in her circuits and her Spark felt warmer and brighter; the tell-tale signs of an approaching overload. While her body was reacting well to this, her mind was thrashing, howling –No! No! Not this!

Don't give in!

"I…I won't!" Arcee whimpered, but deep down she knew that she was fighting a losing battle. No processor-over-matter techniques could save her from this. Her assailant gently bit down on her neck, glossa lapping at the black metal and the pounding veins.

"Oh, but you will." Starscream pressed himself deeper into her and relished in the scream that followed. "A great many times…you will."

Sweet Primus, how he loved that she tried to resist him. How he loved to feel her struggle. But all of that famed discipline would only serve to make him want her more; come the Pit or Unicron himself, this lovely blue femme will fall. In her defiance he saw her shake with same pleasure he was feeling. He could see it plain as day: her Spark was oh so welcoming and seemed to revel in being taken in such a manner. Starscream's breathing became labored with excitement as he felt his own climax approaching like an oncoming storm. She was close, and he fully intended to bring her over the edge.

Despite Arcee's best efforts, she could not completely retreat into her mind. She couldn't think of anything that would allow her to escape this disturbing reality. Think of something! Anything! Don't let him win! Don't let him get the best of you! Don't give him what he wants—

A deep guttural moan from Starscream wrenched her out of concentration. Her attacker was panting louder and louder with each passing moment. He threw his head back and let out a passionate bay of ecstasy as his overload rocked him.

And when his Spark washed over hers, drowning her essence and stimulating it just enough, the instinctual urge had completely overrode rational thought.

…No…

Arcee arched her body, and while she did not scream aloud, ever nerve in her body did. Her mind became an overwhelming and untellable tsunami, so much so that it shook her from the core to the tips of her extremities. Again the world spun, this time not from a stunner but from agonizing pleasure; there was so much so soon, everything a flurry of crashing emotions and senses, her systems couldn't take it…and for the second time that day, she fell unconscious.

Starscream felt the femme become limp, undoubtedly from the force of her overload and removed his arms, letting her hang pathetically. Poor thing, it was just too much for her. She will get used to it though, and soon she will crave his Spark. His optics now had a satisfied glaze to them, as they always did after a good frag. The afterglow was lazily settling in his circuits, already giving him the soft post-merge high that he had been so wrongly deprived of. He rubbed a heated wire near his Spark chamber and felt small stray bursts of electricity rush though him. How he was still standing was a mystery to him; for all intents and purposes the Seeker should've collapsed in a very satisfied heap.

Their merge had been a shallow one, but had given him what he wanted. Arcee's body and Spark were whole new words to explore and conquer, and he had all the time in the universe to discover every last inch. How wonderful it will be to hear her cry out his name, to have her writhe against him like the beautiful whore she was.

She will make such a lovely concubine. Starscream thought as he trailed a talon over the pink crest. With proper training she will learn her place; the crown gem of my empire. I have you now, my dearest pet. And I have no intentions of ever letting you go.