WARNING: THIS STORY IS A SPARIA STORY BUT IT DEALS WITH VERY SERIOUS ISSUES LIKE SELF-HARM AND EATING DISORDERS. IF YOU ARE EASILY TRIGGERED DON'T READ. I DO NOT OWN PLL BUT IF I DID SPARIA WOULD HAVE BEEN A COUPLE FROM DAY ONE. Okay so this is my first fanfic. Please give me feedback on whether you like this story or not and if it is well written or not. The first Chapter will revolve around Aria and her struggles. LAST WARNING: IF YOU EASILY TRIGGERED THEN PLEASE DO NOT READ.

Chapter one: Her Battle

Aria was sitting on her bed in her bedroom with the door wide open and blood trickling from her left wrist to the carpet. She knew that if she doesn't clean the blood soon, it will stain the carpet, but right now she just couldn't bring herself to care. Besides, her parents and Mike were out of town for the week because of a lacrosse tournament that Mike has. She's been doing this ever since she saw her dad making out with Meredith last year. Like always, it had started off with just one cut. But soon after, it became two then three then four until she'd lost count. She never really considered that her cuts were serious because they were always shallow. They were deep enough to feel pain but not deep enough to leave a scar.

Aria was definitely not the perfect typical Rosewood girl, and if anybody found out about her problems she would not be able to hear the end of it. She was already the "strange" girl of the town, she didn't need another label. As she was going to bring the blade over to another part of her wrist, her phone lit up. It was Spencer texting her that she was going to get Chinese food and come over in about half an hour. "Great", she thought. Aria wasn't upset that Spencer was coming over; in fact Aria had absolutely no problem with Spencer coming over. She actually wanted her to, needed her even. She doesn't know when she started crushing on one of her best friends, but she thinks it started when Spencer once begged her to come help her with something and when Aria was reluctant to, Spencer begged her by saying "Come on we`re Team Sparia!" Aria instantly fell in love with that name. Of course Spencer only meant for it to be their friendship name, but ever since then Aria has always thought about how cute they could be if they really became a couple. "Damn, Team Sparia... sounds sexy... Just like Spencer" she thought the first time she acknowledged her feelings towards the tall brunette. But what Aria was really upset about is the food part. Aria despised food. The very thought of food made her stomach churn and turn upside down. This has been going on for a while now too. She supposes that it started off after the Meredith and her dad scene, just like the cutting. It always went back to that afternoon. Again no one noticed that there was anything wrong with her. She decided that in order not let anyone suspect her habits, she told everyone that she decided to become a vegetarian. That way she avoided all the high calorie foods without raising any questions, and everyone bought that lie. Of course she's lost about twenty pounds since then, but everyone just thought it was because she has been on a very healthy diet. She's tried to recover, she really did. But the consuming thoughts were too much for her to handle so she gave up and went back into the arms of her inner demon. After all, Anorexia was a bitch. She'd love to say that she hated all of this, but she'd be lying. Sure these habits drained all her energy, but she felt in control and control is very valuable since everything else in her life lacked of it.

Since she was completely home alone this week, she decided to go on a liquid fast. Only water, zero calorie and low calorie drinks were allowed. But now Spencer was coming over with Chinese food. Her phone lit up again, and once again it was Spencer. the text said that Spencer got the food and was on her way over. She said she'll arrive in ten minutes. "OH CRAP, ten minutes, I gotta clean up!" Aria then ran to the bathroom, put her wrist under water and rinsed it while examining the cut. It was deep but not too deep. She then opened the bathroom cabinet and took out a big bandage from the bandages box that Mike keeps for when he cuts his knee or chin during his games. She bandaged her wrist, washed her blade then soaked a towel and went over to her bedroom to clean her carpet. After rubbing it for two minutes, it was clean enough for no one to notice what was stained on it. When she finished, she went over to her closet and opened it to find something cute to wear for Spencer and to cover up her wrist. She chose her favourite long sleeve checkered shirt and her cutest skinny jeans. She then went and fixed her hair and applied some makeup. Just as she finished, her door bell rang and her heart skipped a beat. "Spencer", she said. She ran down the stairs, and then paused halfway through the living room to calm her breathing. "I hate myself for falling for you" she muttered. "Okay time to get myself together and put on my most convincing smile!" she said to herself as she openned the door. Spencer looked so happy to see her at first but then something in her expression changed. Spencer looked like she just saw a ghost.