FanFiction Royal Rumble III
Summary: 80 men and women from TV, cartoons, games and all around the universe take part in the most popular event in wrestling history, the Fanfiction Royal Rumble! But this time, it's bigger, badder, crazier, meaner, nastier and more explosive than ever! Who will stand tall and claim victory?
Rated T for violence and language.
I do not own any of the characters used in this fanfiction. They belong to their rightful owners, from places such as Cartoon Network, World Wrestling Entertainment, Nickelodeon, Disney, Total Nonstop Action Wrestling, FOX, Adult Swim, and other companies and all the rest.
ForeverTheTorturedRebel is my partner in helping this third annual FFRR come to life, helping me with entrants and eliminations and rest of the bidness.
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The first FanFiction Royal Rumble was done on November 11, 2011, and the winner was Stone Cold Steve Austin. The second Royal Rumble happened in January 5, 2013, and we had a brand new winner: Total Drama's resident Eye Candy, Justin. But unlike the first two Rumbles, the winner will walk out of the Royal Rumble with a prize of... $10,000,000!
Interviews:
Josh Matthews, Matt Striker, Scott Stanford, TNA interviewer Jeremy Borash and legendary hall-of-famer Mean Gene Okerlund from WWE started sitting down with several participants who are were training and preparing to enter this Royal Rumble match for several words about tonight's event.
Wrestlers from the previous Rumble:
Dolph Ziggler's interview:
Matt Striker was standing alongside World Heavyweight Champion Dolph Ziggler who was with his girlfriend A.J. Lee and his backup, Big E. Langston in the interview area.
Matt Striker: Dolph Ziggler, this is gonna be your second time entering this Fanfiction Royal Rumble, but this time as the World Heavyweight Champion. Tell me, do you have any strategy going into this event?
Dolph Ziggler: Striker, you don't have to answer such foolish garbage. Why do you think I'm the World Heavyweight Champion in the first place? The only question you should ask me if why I'm sick of being so damn sick of hearing such garbage from somebody like you? I don't ask trash. I let all my skills do the talking for me. I let all my skills do my thinking. With my girl and Big E at my side, I'm gonna show the whole world that I'm just too damn good to be too damn good. Show... off.
Alberto Del Rio's interview:
Josh Matthews is with both Alberto Del Rio and Ricardo Rodriguez in his locker room.
Josh Matthews: Alberto Del Rio, you didn't get a chance to be in the second Fanfiction Royal Rumble, but what kind of gameplan do you have coming in this event in the third annual Royal Rumble?
Alberto Del Rio: I only have one, Josh. I'm gonna come out firing at all sides. I'm not gonna slouch around and wait for the other amigo to make his move. The only thing I plan to do is to fire each target back to back. You see Josh, it was my dream and my destiny to win a Royal Rumble, but now, this is different, por favor. I have to deal with contestants I've never seen before. Even if they seem to be real or unreal, my destiny is simple, and that's to win the Fanfiction Royal Rumble III. I'll do it for my people of Mexico and everyone in America, who was possible for everyone regardless of skin, age, color or nation to help give us the opportunity that we need to live out the American dream.
Ryback's interview:
Scott Stanford is now joined by Ryback in the same interview area. Unfortunately, Ryback didn't look too happy to begin with.
Scott Stanford: Ryback, you made a huge impression in the last Fanfiction Royal Rumble, mostly when you eliminated the King of Kings, Triple H. But unfortunately, you weren't able to get the job done as you got elimin-
Ryback: *stops Scott right there* 'Weren't able to get the job done'... I can't tell you how much everyone has said that to me. They always said that to me when I tried to take away the WWE title away from CM Punk. They all said that to me when I told them that I was gonna stop the Shield. They even said that to me when I tried to defeat Mark Henry at WrestleMania 29. And they said that when I sent John Cena into a hospital at Extreme Rules. They won't say that to me anymore once I finally win this Rumble once and for all. That way, I can finally get out of the bottom and finally go to the top. No more backing down. This Rumble, I plan to feast on everyone, and not one single bone will be left standing. *staring at Scott deathly* Ryback rules...
Shawn Michaels's interview:
Legendary interviewer "Mean" Gene Okerlund is with WWE hall-of-famer Shawn Michaels in his locker room.
Mean Gene: Shawn Michaels, you've done everything in your career including being the Grand Slam Champion, the 1995 and 1996 Royal Rumble winner, and not to mention you earned the title of "Mr. WrestleMania", due to all your accomplishments. What will this mean if you win the third annual Fanfiction Royal Rumble?
Shawn Michaels: Mean Gene, you're looking at the Main Event, The Showstopper, The Icon, and not to mention Mr. WrestleMania! I've been in matches like this and the only thing you gotta do is to keep your friends close and your enemies closer. And what you gotta do next is to dance all around 79 faces and you're good to go. I'm always a fighter and I'm ready for a fight in the Royal Rumble no matter what the odds are! So get ready, and get set, because The Heartbreak Kid's ready to dance!
The Rock's Interview:
Matt Striker was standing next to the People's Champion, The Rock, in his own dressing room. The Rock looked very pumped and energized.
Matt Striker: Rock, this is perhaps your biggest night you have ever faced in your entire life. You were in the final four in the second annual Fanfiction Royal Rumble, and yet the second time was not the charm. Do you think that you can finally achieve victory here tonight?
Rock was going to respond, but then he was stopped by his fans in the audience who started to chant "Rocky! Rocky! Rocky!", at a loud enough volume for him to hear. With the beat of his own drum, The Rock finally began to speak.
The Rock: *into the mic* Finally... The Rock... has come back to East Rutherford! Striker, when you were saying if the Rock can finally achieve victory in this Fanfiction Royal Rumble, then you can guara-damn-tee that The Rock is gonna do just that. But now, we got new faces that The Rock wants to meet one on one. So far, we got Bully Ray and the Seven Dwarfs, Fat Albert with a Grizzly Adams beard, a shoe salesman, a donkey wizard and her little lizard pet, an evil genius, a god of war, a couple of disinformed cats, a nerd with crotchless stretchpants and suspenders so tight, he has no nuts! But it doesn't matter what Rock goes up against in the Rumble. Two things are gonna be simple: The Rock's throwing everyone out and The Rock's gonna be the one left standing. And that's how the millions... and millions want it! If ya smell... what the Rock... is cookin. *gestures People's Eyebrow"
Bully Ray's interview:
Jeremy Borash was standing near the leader of Aces & Eights and current TNA Champion Bully Ray. He was also standing with his members, namely Devon, D.O.C., Mike Knox, Mr. Anderson, D'Lo Brown, Garett Bischoff, and Wes Brisco.
Jeremy Borash: Um, Bully Ray. Tonight's the Rumble. How will you fare?
Bully Ray: That's nothing for you to be concerned, Borash! I happen to be in the best damn shape of my life. So the only thing you can do is to shut the hell up and let us talk for once! *shoves Borash and takes the mic* Don't you know who I am? Don't you know who we are? We're the Aces & Eights! We do what we want. We take what we want. And we get what we want. And everyone of those 79 buttholes who are gonna be stepping in that ring, are gonna be roadkill in our road to victory! That's what we came to do and there's not a damn thing everyone of you ass-sniffers are gonna do about it! Because when you ride with the Aces & Eights, you never walk alone!
With Bully Ray's speech done, Devon took the mic from Bully Ray and looked straight at the camera.
Devon: Oh my brother... testify!
Other characters from the previous Rumble:
Angry Video Game Nerd's interview:
Josh Matthews is with internet sensation James Rolfe aka The Angry Video Game Nerd at the Nerd's locker room. It is full of video game posters and hot video game chicks. The Nerd of course also brought his signature Rolling Rock drink as well.
Josh Matthews: Nerd, you made history by being the longest-lasting superstar in Fanfiction Royal Rumble history. Of course the record is 68 minutes and 57 seconds. You think anyone has a chance of beating your record?
Angry Video Game Nerd: Josh, from where I come from, records are pointless! The only reason I came to this s**t fest was to win and not just to break any records in the Rumble. Now broken bones? I'm okay with that. But I came here for total f**king victory! I also came here to kick a little ass! That's what I was born to do! Why did you think I was called the Angry Video Game Nerd for nothing? My one and only goal was to take everyone back to the past so I can show my fans the s**tty games that suck ass! It's just like my theme song says! Now if you'll excuse me, I gotta go train, so do me a favor and piss off, you crap-eating gorilla!
Josh Matthews: *disturbed* If you say so.
Geoff and Bridgette's interview:
Matt Striker was with Total Drama's power couple Geoff and Bridgette who are standing near a Coke machine.
Matt Striker: I'm here with both Geoff and Bridgette, who are perhaps warming up gearing up for the third annual Fanfiction Royal Rumble. Now, Geoff and Bridgette, you didn't get to compete in the second Rumble, due to the fact that the two of you were busy doing the Total Drama Aftermath shows. But now that you two are back, anything you like to discuss?
Geoff: I wish I had more to discuss dude, but I'm too busy making out with my girl to at least know what's going on. Trust me... I'll think of something from the Rumble. Just watch and see what me and Bridgette can do. *looks at Bridge* Right, babe?
Bridgette: *in a bit of baby talk* You got that right, my Geoffy-Weoffy.
Geoff: You're so frickin' hot! Let's make out without any interruptions whatsoever, babe!
And then, in an instant, both Geoff and Bridgette started to kiss and makeout heavily on front of the Coke Machine and Matt Striker, who was just about to leave.
Matt Striker: *as he headed out* Okay, thank you for your time... I guess...
Dan's interview:
Scott Stanford was in the locker room with the star of the Hub's 'Dan Vs.', Dan. Dan also seems to have trouble opening up a bag of Doritos to snack on.
Scott Stanford: Now, Dan... Got any strategy for the Royal Rumble?
Dan: Why does it matter to you? I hate everything! Everything makes me sick! Just like those contestants I have to face again. I do not deserve this kind of treatment. So it looks like I have no choice but to get revenge on all 79 who think they can mock me just for their amusement! I will be the winner of Fanfiction Royal Rumble III, and no one, and I do mean no one is gonna stop me! *struggling with the bag* Now if I can only get this bag of Doritos open, I can finally eat something!
Dan started to pull the bag even harder until it finally popped out. But due to his struggling, the rest of the Doritos fell to the floor. Dan saw this as his face started to turned red with so much anger built inside him. That was the moment that he snapped.
Dan: *screaming onto the sky* Doooooritoooooooooos!
Scott Stanford: *nervously* Oh-kay... I'll just leave you alone then...
It was from that moment that Scott ran out of the locker room, finding someone else to interview.
Muscle Man's interview:
Mean Gene Okerlund was with "Regular Show" hooligan Muscle Man, who was busy sitting in a chair somewhere around the backstage area.
Mene Gene Okerlund: Muscle Man, how does it feel to be back in the third annual Fanfiction Royal Rumble?
Muscle Man: WOOOOOOOOO! I feel great! I am just so psyched and red-hot for this event! It's better than the Super Bowl, World Series and Monster Truck Mayhem combined! And since my girl Starla is sitting at ringside waiting for me to unleash my muscular mass on everybody the minute I'm in the ring, I'm gonna dedicate this Rumble match to her! And this time, I will last longer than 15 seconds! You know who else lasts longer than 15 seconds? MY MOM!
Mean Gene: I'm certain you would say that. That joke was horrible...
Justin's interview:
Jeremy Borash was with Total Drama contestant and the winner of Fanfiction Royal Rumble II, Justin in the interview area.
Jeremy Borash: Now Justin, you might not be a contestant on the new season of "Total Drama All-Stars", but you proved everyone that you were a All-Star in the Fanfiction Royal Rumble when you tossed over "The Icon" Sting to win the event. Any idea on how what you'll do in the third Rumble?
Justin: Josh, what can I say? I'm so damned handsome, I'm beautiful, and even though I'm not as evil as Alejandro was, I proved to everyone out there that I belonged here with the legends and superstars who step into that ring every time. Now in the third Rumble, I don't need to prove anything. I'm gonna be like the storm. You may think I'm an ordinary guy who looks at his beautiful self in the mirror all say, but I'm the storm that's gonna devastate everything that rolls through the entire 79 contestants. No more mirrors and no more concerns. This is a time to fight, a time to win, and it's time for this storm to Rumble through the skies!
Newcomer wrestlers:
Mark Henry's interview:
Matt Striker now met up with Mark Henry in the backstage area.
Matt Striker: Mark Henry, this is your first Fanfiction Royal Rumble. Any thoughts?
Mark Henry: Yeah, try asking a better question. But since you really want to find out, I'll tell you anyway. I'm only bent on destruction. I'm only here to demolish, and I'm here for only one purpose: To send all of those 79 worthless bodies into my Hall of Pain. Because that's what I do.
Chavo Guerrero and Hernandez's interview:
Jeremy Borash was with Chavo Guerrero and Hernandez in the interview area.
Jeremy Borash: Chavo and Hernandez, you two may be tag team partners and the current TNA World Tag Team Champions, but in the Rumble, it's every man for himself. What do you think about that situation?
Chavo Guerrero: To tell you the truth Borash, we're uncomfortable standing with that rule, but no matter what happens, me and my amigo Hernandez always got each other's backs no matter what happens. Right, Hernandez?
Hernandez: You got that right, hermano! Me and Chavo are inseparable, and I know that we may fight against each other, but if it comes down to the two of us, were gonna come out swinging! Chavo and SuperMex forever! Viva Mexico!
Jack Swagger's interview:
Josh Matthews was with a 'Real American' Jack Swagger and his manager Zeb Colter somewhere around the backstage area.
Josh Matthews: Jack Swagger, you have any plan of attack for the Rumble?
Before Jack Swagger could speak, Zeb Colter stepped in and spoke for Swagger.
Zeb Colter: Uh, that won't be necessary, Mr. Matthews. Before Mr. Swagger can speak, we have to say in our honor that this is a damn disappointment for America. And I say that on two occasions. One is the fact that we have to fight nothing but senseless cartoon characters, and on the account that number two, this is nothing but wrong. The cartoons, games and television that people play and watch are rotting the youth of America. Not to mention that immigrants, gay marriage, and perhaps violence is damaging the heart and soul of what is now a broken-down nation. We say no more. For here's a man who in one moment, his victory at this so-called Fanfiction Royal Rumble will be a stepping stone to recover what is a great nation. And Jack Swagger will be the man to do what's right for America.
And then, Jack stepped aside and said to Josh's face...
Jack Swagger: We... the people.
Josh Matthews: Thank you for your time, I guess...
Feeling uncomfortable of the look that Swagger was giving him, Josh managed to leave.
Hulk Hogan's interview:
"Mean" Gene Okerlund stood by with legendary wrestler/reality star Hulk Hogan in the Hulk's locker room.
Gene Okerlund: Hulk Hogan, the Fanfiction Royal Rumble is at hand. Any comments before going into the event?
Hulk Hogan: You bet your head I do, Mean Gene. This is a kind of Royal Rumble that the Hulkster has never face before. We got a lot more guys, gals, guns and everything that's gonna be shooting in between. This is a war. This isn't no high-school dance, no cup of tea whatsoever! This Rumble is about proving who's the big dog of them all and what it takes to survive in such a warzone like this! And with me and my Hulkamaniacs leading the charge, this is the kind of war that we're gonna win once and for all. And to all of the 79 men who are gonna step up, I only got one question for all of you: Whatcha gonna do when the largest arms in the world and Hulkmania rumble on through?!
Matt Hardy's Interview:
Scott Stanford was in the interview area with Cameron, North Carolina's own Matt Hardy.
Scott Stanford: Matt Hardy, you mark your return in the Royal Rumble, alongside your own brother, Jeff Hardy. Is there any thoughts you have leading up to the Rumble?
Matt Hardy: I do, Scott. All my life, me and Jeff have always stood close to one another. Sure we may have had our differences, but we always found a way to get back together, no matter how good and bad. This is a different battlefield than the ones I've been in. Me and my brother are gonna take everyone to the extreme here tonight. And whichever one of us stands tall by the time the Rumble ends, Team Xtreme will live on!
Newcomer non-wrestlers:
Al Bundy's interview:
Josh Matthews was in the locker room with "Married... With Children" fan favorite and shoe salesman, Al Bundy. He seems to be wearing his Polk High football jersey as his battle armor.
Josh Matthews: Now, Al Bundy, we all know that you used to be a famous high school football athlete. How do you think that your experience in the field will do with experience in the ring tonight?
Al Bundy: You see, Gene... I- you don't mind if I can call you 'Gene', right?
Josh Matthews: Um, actually my name is Josh.
Al Bundy: Well you see Gene, I been through all types of hell. Whether it has to do with women the size of hippos, the French, annoying neighbor women who look like little boys, shoes, or perhaps nagging wives with huge red hair, I've been through it all. But there's one thing I have learned from being in hell. You gotta fight your way out of it. And today in the Rumble, I'm fighting my way through hell! *nears his eyes* Let's rock...
With this, Josh Matthews left the locker room.
Twilight Sparkle's interview:
Matt Striker stood by a nervous Twilight Sparkle at the interview area.
Matt Striker: Now, miss Sparkle, this is your first FanFiction Royal Rumble in the series, so a lot must be going through your mind.
Twilight Sparkle: Matt... I gotta tell you, I'm excited, but at the same time, I'm a little nervous too. I mean, I've seen how long my friend Rainbow Dash survived in the last Rumble, and I expected qutie a bit from her, considering her track record. I'm not as unfortunate; as a matter of fact, I might not last very long, but as long as Applejack and I try our best, and with the rest of our friends standing by in the audience, I'm set.
Dipper and Mabel Pines's interview:
Scott Stanford was at the interview area with twin brother and sister Dipper and Mabel Pines of "Gravity Falls" fame.
Scott Stanford: Now, Dipper and Mabel, what are your thoughts on being contestants of the biggest Royal Rumble ever?
Dipper Pines: Truth be told, Scott? I'm a little bit nervous. Sure, it's actually my first time being in a wrestling ring, but against a large group of people? That's gonna be tough. *toughens up* But I'm pretty sure I can get through it if I can try to outsmart Aces and Eights. They're nothing but cloned Robbies except much more meaner and nastier! But no matter, cause I can take care of myself. *to Mabel* Right, Mabel?
Mabel Pines: Absolutely! Me and my brother are here for one reason. And that's to win the Fanfiction Royal Rumble. I know there can only be one winner, but if it comes down to me and my brother, I just want to say that I'm gonna split the prize money with him! I always wanted a lifetime supply of Smile Dip!
Scott Stanford: *looking uncomfortable* Yeah, we might not wanna go there. I already tried that stuff and it fried my mind out, believe me. But thank you for your time.
Dr. Heinz Doofenshmirtz's interview:
Jeremy Borash was standing in the locker room with the evil genius Dr. Heinz Doofenshmirtz, who seemed to put on some sort of blue lab gloves.
Jeremy Borash: Dr, Heinz Doofenshmirtz, this is your first time competing in the Fanfiction Royal Rumble. What are your thoughts, despite wearing those weird blue gloves of yours?
Dr. Doofenshmirtz: You like? Well, these gloves here are just a part of my newest invention. I like to call this the Punch-inator! Sure, these may look like lab gloves to you, but they pack quite a punch. With one blow, they'll all be sent through the sky. I'm gonna test these out on all of the 79 fools who think twice before approaching me. With these gloves of mine, I'll be one step away from winning the Royal Rumble and ruling the whole Tri-State Area!
Jeremy Borash: *looking at Doof's gloves and trying not to snicker* Well... thanks anyway.
Borash, baffled by Dr. Doof "plans" to take over just a mere tiny bit of the world, left as he tried not to snicker about Doofenshmirtz's silly gloves.
Liu Kang's Interview:
"Mean" Gene Okerlund was standing with Mortal Kombat kombatant Liu Kang in the interview area as the shaolin monk was stretching.
Mean Gene: I am standing here with one of the contestants of the Fanfiction Royal Rumble, Liu Kang from Mortal Kombat. Now Liu Kang, you're a competitor that has been through it all in Mortal Kombat tournaments in the past. Tell me, how will your martial arts experience fare out in the Rumble?
Liu Kang: To tell you the truth, I think I'll fare just fine. I'm never afraid of anything. I'm doing this not just for myself, but I'm doing it for my family and my friends at Earthrealm. I'm also doing this for Kitana. I love her with all my heart and it'll be an interesting match-up if we're the only two left standing in the Rumble. But no matter what happens to either me and Kitana, I'm gonna give it all 100 percent, Mean Gene. And that's all I have to say.
Get ready, because all of these competitors and more will be in the third annual Fanfiction Royal Rumble, coming by tonight!
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That's all for the interviews then. My good friend ForeverTheTorturedRebel mostly made a good certain amount of these interviews and I of course had little to do with the help. There were a couple of more interviews that FTTR did, but I forgot where they went. When I find them, I'll just plop them in as a bonus chapter for a reason of some sort.
Next up, the promo for the third edition of the Fanfiction Royal Rumble is coming up soon. Yep, it's gonna be 'all about the numbers'! So, stay tuned and keep rockin'!