Suddenly it seemed like summer was fading into fall and Alexis was six short weeks from her due date. It was the beginning of august and while she was happy that it was nice out she also felt like she could kill whoever invented hot weather. Sitting on her couch she had four fans pointed at her and she was still hot.

"Uh! I'm going to melt!" standing up she stretched her tank top over her belly and smiled…..

Kevin laughed as he and Devlin stepped off the elevator on their floor. They had spent a rare Saturday at the zoo. Kevin had played hooky from work, decided that it was time that he had a day out with his son. As he opened the front door he laughed at the scene in front of him. Alexis was standing in front of his freezer eating ice cream out of the carton and humming to herself.

"Hi bug!" she said as Devlin came racing up to her. She picked him up and set him on her hip like he weighed nothing, he still hadn't figured out how she did that at eight months pregnant.

"What are you doing here Lex, I know you have ice cream at your house" he said as he kissed her cheek and shut the freezer door.

"Ahhh but you have butter pecan and I really wanted some" Smiling she set Devlin down started digging into the ice cream again.

"I will never understand how pregnant women could want ice cream so much that they break and enter" he laughed as she smacked his arm. He leaned up against the counter next to her and smiled at her stomach. Her shirt had ridden up without her knowing, she was beautiful standing there her hair all up in a messy pony tail and ice cream on her nose. Reaching over he wiped it off and when she blushed he tried not to smile even more.

"Well now that I have raided your ice cream I am going to steal your son because I need help getting started on the baby's scrap book and I know how much he loves to …." He laughed lightly when they turned to look at his son, who was fast asleep on the couch.

"I don't think he is going anywhere" Ryan said and put an arm around her shoulders. "But I did have a question for you"

"Oh really and what can I help you with my dear neighbor"

"Javi set me up on a date for tomorrow night and I was wondering if you could watch Devlin" He could see the emotions on her face go from happy, to sad back to happy. He knew he was doing the right thing by going out with someone tomorrow, if only so that Alexis wouldn't start to feel the way he felt about her.

"Ohhhh and who is the lucky lady…. Do I need to grill her before you take her out?" she said faking enthusiasm.

"No you do not need to grill her" He laughed shortly. "Her name is Kelly and she works at the Funeral place over on 6th street. Laine knows her and insisted that he set us up"

"Well good" she said and started walking towards the door. "Just let me know what time tomorrow and I'll set something fun up for me and Dev to do."

"Lex…. You sure you don't want to stay for dinner? I was going to order a pizza" he said and he could see it in her face that she was upset.

"No, I'm kind of tired now. I think I am just going to go lay down" he stood there in the kitchen staring at the door long after she had left. This was the right thing to do… he knew it was.

Kevin had left three hours ago with his date and had promised not to be back to late. Alexis had told him not to worry that she and Devlin were going to stay up all night and watch movies. She'd gotten them all set up with popcorn and root beer floats. Devlin had fallen asleep an hour after Kevin left and suddenly she hated that he was on a date. It had bothered her a bit yesterday and it wasn't until about an hour ago that she realized why. She was jealous, she'd had Kevin and Delvin practically all to herself the last three months and she didn't want to share them with some woman.

Setting Devlin down on the small bed she'd gotten for him in the baby's room, she walked back into the living room and sighed. She hated feeling like there was nothing she could do. Alexis had known for a while she had feelings for Kevin, she'd always felt something for him, but she had always pushed it off as a sisterly affection, that was until she got pregnant and he had practically taken her in.

Hearing a key in the lock she got up and busied herself with cleaning up the mess in the living room. She would not let him see her upset. "How was your date?" she called over her shoulder as she walked into the kitchen.

"It was nice; Sharon is a very nice woman." She didn't want to turn and look at him, setting the popcorn bowl in the sink she turned on the faucet and started doing the dishes. "How was Devlin?"

She could hear him move closer, it was like she could almost feel him waiting for some kind of reaction from her. "He was wonderful as always, though he fell asleep in the middle of the first movie."

"Good. Good. How are you feeling? I know you've got to be tired, do you want me to take Devlin home?" Finally she turned to face him and suddenly she could feel her face grow hot. He was wearing a pair of tight fitting pants and a black Sabbath T-Shirt.

"No, he's asleep in the nursery." Looking down at her feet she picked at the hem of her shirt. "I think I am going to head to be now too. You're right I am pretty tired."

She went to walk past him and he grabbed her pulling her into one of his all-consuming hugs. She always felt so safe when he was holding her.

"I'm so sorry Lex." She just nodded into his shoulder and pulled back to look at him. She could see it in his face, the struggle to do what he wanted and what he thought was right.

"It's okay. Don't worry about it" pulling away she smiled at him. "Lock up behind you okay"

Turning she walked into the hallway and didn't look back.

She avoided him for the next few weeks. She slipped her rent under his door when she knew he was out and if she was watching Devlin she always acted like she was in a hurry so that he wouldn't try and talk to her. She didn't know how to react to Kevin dating someone; it was like her heart was broken all over again.

Sitting in her living room she stared at the latest sonogram of her little baby girl. Allana; she had decided for a name. She was ready to have her baby here with her and in a few short weeks she would be.

No matter how much she tried to focus on getting ready for the baby she couldn't seem to stop thinking about Kevin. Javi had stopped by the day before and excitedly told her about how Kevin and Sharon seemed to be getting along really well and he could tell that maybe Kevin was falling for her. She had felt sick the rest of the day.

Kate had noticed the distance between them and had asked Alexis about it earlier that day.

"Lex are you sure you're okay? I noticed how withdrawn you have been since Kevin stopped hanging around so much."

"Yeah, I'm good I just don't have time to do anything what with the baby coming and everything. I just need to focus on Allana and I will be just fine" the last few words barely left her mouth and Kate was hugging her. She started crying all over her step mom and couldn't stop.

"It will be okay, it's normal to have feelings for someone you grew so close too"

"I know that, but why can't he just break the rules for once? Who cares if I am younger? I don't! And Dad doesn't care that your twelve years younger than he is!" She said and wiped her eyes.

"Things are different with your dad and me. I couldn't stand him in the beginning and then it was attraction from then on. You and Kevin well you acted like ….." She looked over at Kate when she stopped talking.

"We acted like what?"

Kate looked thoughtful for a moment "Well you have kind of always acted like a couple. Like an old married couple actually, even when he was with Jenny"

"How do you mean?" Alexis was confused,

"You've always done things with him, the little things like fixing his tie or eating off his plate when we went to dinner. I always thought that kind of peeved Jenny" Kate said and laughed.

"Oh it did. He used to text me the next day or call and say that I had to be good because Jenny was jealous about how good of friends we were" She sniffled and looked down at her hands. "I can't do this; I can't live this close to him anymore."

"Oh Lex" Kate said and hugged her again.

Pulling herself from the memory she put the picture of her baby into her purse and stood. Maybe Kevin was right, it was for the best. Walking over to the front door she grabbed her suit case and looked over her living room one last time. Her stuff was in boxes and her dad had promised to come get it all the next day. It was time to move on.

Kevin couldn't shake the feeling that something was off. Javi had been keeping him away from Castle and Beckett all day and when he stepped off the elevator on his floor he was suddenly feeling like something was missing. Knowing that Laine had Devlin for the night he walked up the hall to Alexis' apartment and unlocked the door, maybe he just needed to see her. He hadn't seen too much of her for a while and he missed her.

When he opened the door he almost dropped his keys. Her apartment was all packed up and her pictures were off the walls, calling out for her he went to the nursery to see that it too was packed up and the crib had already been taken apart. After searching the rest of the apartment he felt anger well up in him and disappointment that she felt she had to run away.

Slamming the front door shut he stormed down the hall and into the elevator. There was no way she got to just walk away without talking to him first.

Alexis was laying on the bed in her room when she heard a shouting match coming from down stairs. Getting up she winced a little and when it passed the walked down the stairs to see her dad and Kevin yelling at each other while Kate stood in the middle.

"What is going on" she asked holding her belly.

"This butt head thinks he can just barge in here and demand to talk to you" Her dad said jabbing a finger at Kevin.

"Lex, I just want to talk to you please" Kevin said and she could hear the pleading in his voice.

"We don't have anything to talk about. So if you're not here to talk about Devlin then I don't want to hear it." Turning she walked into the kitchen ignoring his footsteps behind her and the arguing between her dad and Kate.

"How come you get to just run away? Without even telling me you were moving out? Why don't you talk to me anymore?"

"Why should I have to tell you anything" she swung around and poked her finger into his chest. "We are not together, never have been never will be. You are with Sharon remembering? You didn't want me you wanted her!"

"Lex, you don't understand!"

"Oh I understand Detective Ryan! You can't possible fathom that we can be together because I am so much younger than you; you don't even take into account how I feel about that decision! I loved you so much it hurt and you just kept pushing me away, like I was some child."

"No Lex I don't think of you as a child at all…." He stepped back and rubbed his hand over his face "What you don't get is that even when I was married to Jenny…. You were always there, it was like as soon as you turned eighteen and went off to college we became such close friends and it was like you knew me better than my wife did. I didn't know how to handle it; I shoved it into the back of my mind. Then things with Jenny fell apart and suddenly you were back and pregnant and all I wanted to do was take care of you."

"I still don't get it, how come we can't get past how old I am? How come you just can't allow yourself to be happy with me?" she was crying now, and when he pulled her into a hug she let him tangle his fingers in her hair.

"Because I think I do love you and I …. I think I am just scared that it's going to end up like it did with Jenny." She looked up at him and saw a look of realization on his face "And I think maybe for a long time it's always been you, and I guess I feel guilty that I might have been that way even when I was married"

"Oh" she didn't know what to say, she pulled away from him and touched his face "Why didn't you say anything? I've been over eighteen for quite some time now"

"I just couldn't, and I know that doesn't sound right…." He took both her hands and smiled sadly at her. "Please just come home, I'll help you unpack your apartment and we can talk about this more"

She suddenly felt a hard pain in her gut, "I can't"

"Why not? Please Lex I need you to just come home"

"No I can't Kevin" She smiled at him and pointed to her feet, they were wet and her toes felt sticky, "My water broke"