"Peter. You won't forget me, will you?" Wendy whispered.
"Me? Forget? Never!" he replied confidently. Peter was confident in everything he did, Wendy knew that. He peered down at her, his crooked cocky grin on his lips, his chest puffed out, his hands on his hips. He looked triumphant.
"Will you ever come back?" The words escaped Wendy's lips, vocalizing her desperate wish for this not to be over. She could not bear to think of a life without this magical, clever boy in it.
"To hear stories," he said slowly, "about me."
Wendy smiled as Peter leapt into the air, twisting and tumbling, and dancing around like the child he was. He laughed that special laugh that only he could laugh, and he launched himself out of the window. From outside the window, he spun around to face her. He hovered in mid air and he peered quizzically at her. For one mystical moment, he stared at her, a completely serious expression on his face. His brow furrowed as he studied her. Almost as suddenly, that cocky grin was back on his face. So fleeting was this one glimpse of a somber Peter that Wendy almost didn't believe it had ever happened.
Wendy waved sadly at Peter, and Peter responded with a proud salute. A second later he was dashing off again, Tink struggling to keep up. Wendy continued to watch as the boy became less and less visible. When he became so small that he was just a shooting star racing through the sky, Wendy whispered after him, "Peter, you are the greatest there ever was."
X.X
Peter went back to Neverland, as he said he would, and he did everything that he did before Wendy had come, as he said he would. He still danced with the Indians, and passed the pipe around with Tiger Lily and her father. He continued to swim around with the mermaids, and he continued to hunt the wild beasts.
At first he thought he was happy, but soon he realized he no longer was interested in his usual pursuits. Nothing had changed, but everything had changed. He felt Wendy's absence everywhere. He could not remember how he had ever survived without Wendy. He went home expecting to find her tidying the underground house, ready to force that cursed medicine down his throat, but as he slid down through his opening, he found he was alone.
One day, as he hunted a beast, the wild animal struck out, giving Peter a horrible scratch just over his eye. He flew home quick as a flash, thinking Wendy would be there ready to bandage it and make everything better but he was greeted with the sad realization that he was alone. Peter let the wound scab over, and then picked at it constantly, for Wendy was not there to stop him. Soon enough he was sporting an impressive scar.
In every way, Neverland pleased Peter less and less. He found no amusement in hunting the animals, and soon they stopped running from him. Whenever he danced with Tiger Lily he found himself comparing her to Wendy, and the comparisons only made dancing with Tiger Lily unbearable. He even found no amusement torturing the few pirates that remained in Neverland. They would whip out their guns and shoot away at him, but he simply dodged the bullets and flew on.
One day as Peter flew around the boundaries of Neverland, he found that the mountains were closer in to the lagoon than they had ever been before. Scratching his head, he spun around and flew off in the opposite direction. Surely enough, on the other side the forest was closer in as well. He plummeted to the ground and began sprinting through the woods. Within a few minutes he reached the mist that was the end of Neverland.
Peter could not understand it. Neverland had never changed before, save for the seasons and the weather. But Peter brought about the changes, Peter was the prince of Neverland, and the changes were always done to please him.
Peter spent the rest of the week flying and sprinting to all the edges of Neverland, and everywhere he went he noticed the marching in of the boundaries. The mists crawled closer, the forests thinned, the mountains shrank, and the lagoon grew shallower. Neverland was shrinking.
X.X
Time passed quickly for Wendy Darling. She could feel the days slip by around her, and still she waited for Peter to visit. At first she, John, Michael and the Lost Boys would talk about Peter all the time, wondering what adventures he was getting into, and retelling their favorite near death experiences he had gotten them in to.
As time passed, however, their talks grew more sporadic. Instead of wondering about Peter, they would talk about other children at school. Instead of retelling adventures, the boys would talk about math, sports, and other manly interests. Soon she no longer told the boys bedtime stories about Peter Pan, for they were too old to expect or want to hear them. The boys seemed to almost forget all about Peter Pan, but Wendy could not.
In her dreams Peter would slip through her bedroom window, sit on the edge of her bed and play his lute to her. She would wake up and they would fly around the room as they had on the night they first met. Every night she dreamt of him, but every night she was disappointed when her dreams did not come true. Before she even realized she had grown at all, Wendy Darling was fifteen years old. Three whole years had passed, and Peter hadn't come to visit once.
X.X
One day when Peter went to visit the mermaids by the lagoon, he was met with a troubling statement.
"Peter! How old you look!" the red-haired mermaid exclaimed as she thrashed her tail and shook her hair seductively.
"What are you talking about mermaid? I am youth! I am freedom!" Peter cried out with the same youthful bravado he always spoke with. Secretly, he found himself replaying her words over and over again in his head. Shaking off the thought like he would bat away the fairies, he stored the perplexing information in the corners of his brain.
That night, he picked it out again, dusted it off, and thought about what she had said. He, Peter Pan, look old? It was ridiculous. He did not age. Did he?
He paused, thinking seriously as he had never done before. He had felt older lately. He felt tired, he felt unexciting, and the childish pursuits that he had always cherished and enjoyed no longer brought him any excitement.
Standing up, he went to the small pool of water and peered over the edge. He did look older. He went and lay in his bed, and was astonished to find out that his feet dangled off the edge. As he tried to shoot up his opening to the underground house, he was astonished to find it was too snug, and he got stuck half-way up. He pulled on his favorite bearskin cape, and the fur did not even touch the ground. Peter was taller, weighed more, and was more muscular. He had grown.
X.X
Wendy sat on the edge of her bed, holding in her hand the kiss from Peter. She knew it was ridiculous that she still held on to the acorn given to her by a boy three years ago, but it broke her heart to even think about throwing it away. She missed that darling, perfect, magical boy every day. She had known he would be busy in Neverland, but she had thought that he would have visited her by now. She was starting to grow frightened that Peter had forgotten about her after all. He did forget things rather often. She desperately tried to remind herself that he had promised to remember her, but the happy belief refused to stay in her brain.
Wendy returned the acorn necklace to around her neck, and laid her head on her pillow. She considered venturing into the boy's room, for they were always able to distract her and make her merry again. She sometimes regretted having her own bedroom, but her parents had insisted it was only proper that a growing girl should have a room separate from her brothers. Wendy tried to gather the strength to get out of bed, but she found that her despair weighed her down immensely, and she doubted she could even wiggle a toe without growing fatigued. Indeed she tried, and she immediately fell asleep.
X.X
Peter did not realize he was going before he had gone. He simply decided to go play among the stars when before he knew it he was sitting on the short hand of Big Ben, staring off into the distance where he remembered the Darling house to be located.
He had not planned to go, but he found that now that he was close, he couldn't understand why he hadn't come before. He had been missing Wendy for ages, and John, Michael and the Lost Boys. He had been terribly lonely without them, and he had wanted them back, but he hadn't even thought that he could go see them any time! He had been too focused on his own changes and Neverland's shrinking borders.
As he sat on the clock tower, he tried to imagine what he would say to the boys and Wendy. Would he demand that they come back to Neverland with him? It was no longer fun without them, and he assumed that their absence was why it was shrinking. He didn't understand the reasoning behind it, but that was the only explanation.
So to Neverland they must go. For a brief moment, Peter believed all would be perfect again. But the moment was brief, and soon it passed as the realization that they may not want to come back entered his head. In fact, he was rather sure they would refuse to come back. They had chosen to live in London, they had chosen to grow up and become men. And Wendy, she had wanted to go home the entire time she was in Neverland.
Time had passed anyway, Peter knew not how much, but time certainly had passed. If Peter had grown, so too must have Wendy and the boys. Perhaps they were already grown adults, with Husbands and Wives, and perhaps children of their own. Peter was unsure what the age was when children ceased to be children and instead became adults.
Peter was now more frightened than he had ever been before, in fact he was sure that this was the first time he had ever been frightened in his life. He realized with growing dread that every moment that passed Wendy was growing older. Perhaps in a minute she would be an adult. In an hour she might meet that man called Husband. If Peter ever hoped to see his darling Wendy again, he would have to hurry, every second counted. And so with that thought in mind, Peter launched himself off the tower and into the wind.
X.X
A wind blew through the open window of the boy's room, tickling the boy's feet and sifting through their hair. Tootles, without waking, suddenly knew that a figure from his past was returning. The image was hazy, like a stuffed animal he hadn't played in years that now sat in the closet. He focused in, and suddenly the image became clear. Peter Pan! In his mind, all that he had forgotten about Neverland came rushing back. Every memory passed through his brain. He was in the middle of remembering the time he turned his back for one moment, and the Indians kidnapped Slightly, when a thought interrupted him.
'Where's Wendy, Tootles?' the familiar voice demanded. Tootles did not wake, he barely even moved. He snuggled closer to his pillow and dreamily whispered back.
'Down the hall, on the right, Peter.'
The voice left , and Tootles continued in his dreams.
X.X
Peter crept down the hall, as Tootles said. He felt his heart lurching and tumbling with every step. Would Wendy be grown? Would she have this Husband creature he had always despised? Would she still remember Peter, or be glad to see him? He had no answers, and so he continued to tiptoe towards the answers.
He quietly cracked open the first door on the right, and slipped through the door. He halted when he saw the bed, and the sleeping figure lying upon it. She was facing away from him, and so he could not see whether she was an adult. He could have flown and hovered above her, but he could not find the courage. He simply stood and waited.
As if she knew what had to be done, Wendy rolled over in her sleep, allowing Peter to see the face he had been thinking about for so long.
Sinking to his knees, Peter felt his stomach sink. Wendy had grown. She was not quite as old as Mrs. Darling, so surely she was not a Woman or a Wife yet, but she looked immeasurably older than before. He felt despair creep over his heart, perhaps for the first time ever. He was absolutely certain she was much too old for him now. Surely she would have no need for him, or place for him in her life. She would not tell him stories, or bandage his head, or make him take his medicine. She had likely already forgotten him. And so Peter sat on the floor and he wept.
X.X
Wendy was roused from her dreams by the sound of weeping. In fact the weeping was so familiar that she could not be certain whether she had in fact awoken, or whether she was dreaming still. She could scarcely believe it, but she could not be mistaken. With a small, slightly disbelieving smile crawling onto her face, Wendy Darling spoke.
"Boy, why are you crying?"
X.X
The voice sounded so similar, so endearingly familiar that Peter stopped crying at once. She did not sound so much older. He lifted his head from his hands and brushed the tears away, and looked at Wendy, who was now sitting up. Indeed, in the proper angle, and now that his eyes had grown accustomed to the light, he found she didn't look that much older either! She had grown, but then, inexplicably, so had he. And she noticed it too.
"Oh!" she cried, her lips forming a perfect 'O'. "Peter! Peter, you've grown!"
"I know, Wendy. I am older," he said, looking down at his feet, which were further down than he remembered them being.
"How, Peter? You never grow!" she cried, climbing out of bed and standing next to him. "Truly, Peter, you almost look like a -" she was interrupted by Peter clamping his hand over her mouth.
"Don't say it, Wendy. I am not a man!" he said angrily, though it was really out of desperation. "In any case, I don't know why I have grown. Strange things have started happening to me," he said sadly, his head hanging.
Wendy cooed delightedly over him, grabbing his hand and pulling him to the window seat. They sat together, Wendy stroking his hair soothingly as Peter rested it on her shoulder.
"What's been happening, Peter?" she whispered, still gently combing through his hair with her fingers. She was shocked to see that even his golden locks had grown longer.
"I have grown bigger. I cannot get into the house anymore. I have had to sleep in the clouds lately. And Neverland is shrinking," he replied sadly.
"Shrinking?!" Wendy cried out confusedly, drawing away and looking him in the eyes.
"Aye, shrinking. The boundaries are closing in more and more every day. The Indian Land is now at the edge of Neverland."
"I'm afraid I don't understand, Peter," Wendy said, sitting back once more, allowing Peter to rest on her shoulder. She had never known him to be so still. Before, he would have been crowing and bouncing around on the beds. Now he just sat quietly, looking ever so tired.
"I don't understand either, Wendy. But I don't like it. It's strange. Neverland doesn't feel like Neverland to me anymore. I don't enjoy it anymore," he whispered to her.
Wendy felt conflicting emotions rage through her. On one hand it devastated her to think that the island she had so loved, and she had spent so long dreaming of was disappearing and losing all that made it magical. But on the other hand, Peter was growing, Peter was in London, and Peter didn't love Neverland anymore. A secret, selfish part of her was more excited than she could remember being in the past three years.
"Peter, if Neverland is changing and you are growing anyway…" she began. Peter sat up, and looked at her quizzically.
"What?"
"Perhaps you'd like to just stay in London? Live here with us? Like the Lost Boys did. They do so love it here, Peter. They all share a room, all eight of them! And they still play and wrestle and cause mischief," she began speaking very quickly, her excitement getting the best of her. Perhaps she could convince him, and then he would stay. If she convinced him that growing up wasn't so very bad.
"And they love school, truly they do! They all brag about what sports games they played and how they scored the winning goal. And they are all well liked and have so many friends. And they still have so much time before they are expected to become men…" she let her speech dangle in the air, hopefully enticing Peter to give her a chance.
"If I stayed here…" Peter began uncertainly, "would I become a man?"
"Not right away. You and I must be roughly the same age. I am not yet sixteen. You would still have a few years before you would be a man."
"But once I did become a man, I would have to work and do adult things, right?"
"Yes," Wendy said slowly, "you would get a job, and a wife, and perhaps have children."
"I do not want Wife!" Peter replied stubbornly. He understood that Husbands and Wives went together, and he hated Husbands, because some day Wendy would have one. When Wendy had a husband she would not have time for him anymore, Hook had told him that.
Wendy looked down, sadly. She would never say it out loud, but she had long held a secret wish that Peter would become her husband someday. She could not picture herself with any other. Peter was her best friend, he held all the traits that she found to be fascinating and charming, and all his faults were ones that she found to be endearing. She felt that with Peter, growing up would be quite an adventure
"You wouldn't have to worry about that right away," she said weakly, still staring at her toes.
Peter stood up and paced around the room, and Wendy watched him. He did seem so very different.
"You've changed so much, Peter. It's been so long since I've seen you."
Peter stopped pacing and rushed to her feet, kneeling on the ground and grasping her hands. "The time I spent away from you went so slowly, Wendy. Every day I missed you. I couldn't even enjoy hunting or terrorizing the pirates.
Wendy giggled, feeling her cheeks grow red with pleasure. Clearly, Peter had missed her. Perhaps he did love her after all, like Hook had said, and he just didn't know it.
"Then why didn't you come sooner? I waited for you."
Peter crossed his legs and sat on the floor, though he continued to grip her hands. "Time goes so much faster in Neverland, Wendy. I didn't realize how long had passed until I realized I was growing. And then I tried to understand why everything was changing, and I was so confused. I couldn't think anything through, I've never been unsure before. And so I decided to fly, and I found myself here."
"Oh Peter," Wendy said with feeling, "how desperately you must have needed me!"
"I did, I was desperately lonely. I needed a mother!" Peter chirped, happy to see Wendy smiling. "Look Wendy! Do you see my scar?" he said, pointing to his brow.
"Oh, I do see it!" Wendy said, "Does it still hurt terribly?"
"It does," Peter said very gravely, trying to sound very mysterious and dangerous. He enjoyed the way Wendy looked at him and fussed over him.
"Should I perhaps kiss it, to make it better, Peter?" she offered slyly, taking care to look up at him through her eyelashes.
Peter glanced up at her quickly, startled and confused by the feelings that were suddenly rising up in him. Instead of answering, he rose up to her level, and allowed her to plant a kiss lightly above his eye. Then, before he could lose his nerve, Peter leaned in and planted a light kiss on her lips. A shiver ran through his bones, and fairies seemed to be trapped inside his stomach. He pulled away and locked eyes with Wendy.
"Oh the cleverness of me, for coming back to you," he whispered in her ear.