"I cannot think of anyone who would attack you while in this classroom."

The silence that followed was broken by a single sound of derision from the back. Everyone turned to look at the two transfers from Japan.

"Yes dear, would you like to say something?" Umbridge asked, her falsely polite tone implying in no uncertain terms that should they answer it had better be Ministry approved propaganda or there would be severe consequences. Unfortunately for Umbridge, Ryuuzaki Rue either did not pick up on it or, the more likely option, did not think her severe consequences were very severe at all.

"I can think of several people that would attack everyone in this classroom with no second thoughts" his monotone voice echoed slightly as the rest of the class prepared for what they knew was going to be a huge humiliation for Umbridge. Rumour had it that Ryuuzaki had won multiple arguments with Dumbledore.

"Oh? And who might those people be?"

"Well first and foremost there is a 50 percent chance that Light-kun will attempt to attack you Professor Umbridge." Simultaneously every pair of eyes in the classroom slid to the person sitting next to Ryuuzaki in disbelief. Light Yagami was not the sort of person you would expect to attack someone. Ever. Under any circumstances.

"My, my Ryuuzaki such a low percentage, you only gave me a 50 percent chance? Your sugar intake must be almost nothing if you're spouting off such skewed percentages. You should have given me 75 percent at least."

Okay I have no idea where I was going with this. I blame the plot bunnies. They hopped around my head and offered me cookies if I wrote this. Please just ignore the fact that L seems to accept that Light is violent and/or Kira and go with it? Please?

You can do whatever you want with this if you think you can do something with it. It is yours. I haven't even read most of Death Note so there is no way I'm going to do anything more than drabbles, I was just reading a bunch of fanfics and thought hey wouldn't it be great if L and Light mindfucked Hogwarts. So there you go. Enjoy.