Guess who's back! Back again!

My laptop died and so I'm using my notepad on my phone haha! Please bare with me! I love you all!

"Why are you laughing?" Jace said as he stared a hole into the wall opposite him as they all sat in Alec's room.

"You've got to agree this is pretty funny," Alec said with another cackle. His laugh always sounded forced, like he didn't use it often enough. "The infamous playboy just got played. The irony in it is hilarious."

Isabelle sat further back in the beanbag chair she had gotten Alec for his birthday two years ago, to make his dreary room more "lively" as she put it, taking another long moment to examine her perfect nail beds. "You do have to admit," She spoke through a bored expression as she uncapped the red nail polish. "He does have a point."

Alec barely spared his sister a glance as he nodded before swinging his eyes back to Isabelle. "You spill that bottle in my room and I will take all those lacey straps you call underwear and rip them apart."

Isabelle rolled her eyes as she redipped her brush, not even pausing to truly listen to what her older brother was saying. "Yeah, whatever, Alec. I promise not to spill my nail polish and add a bit of color to your drab room." Isabelle scoffed before raising at eyebrow at her scowling brother. "I mean seriously, you do know there are more clothes in the world other than black, brown, and navy blue right?"

"I happen to like my room the way it is."

"Yeah, you and the Addam's family."

Alec clenched his hands into fists as he glared at his sister who didn't pause in painting each nail to perfection. "You can't even stand in your room with all the mess."

"Well, I'd rather be messy than boring." She flipped her long hair over her shoulder with a sincere nonchalance that only fueled her older brother's rage. Jace and Isabelle always did managed to keep a calm exterior when fighting, while Alec never seemed to be able to keep his true feelings at bay. It had only resulted in angering the blue eyed boy further whenever they all had a dispute.

"Oh yeah? Well, I'd—"

Jace stood with a shout. "Hey," Both teens were taken by surprised as Isabelle's fingers twitched making the nail polish tip forward before Alec's hand shot out and caught the teetering bottle with a glare at his sheepish-looking sister, who only had the decency to shrug before resuming her task. "We're talking about me and my struggling relationship with Clary. Remember?"

Isabelle gave a scoff before standing herself. "Oh, your relationship is fine. You just have to work for something for once in your pathetic life and you have no idea how to go about it." The word "pathetic" caused Jace to flinch. She wasn't wrong in saying so, but that was why it had struck home with him so harshly. "Well welcome to life, Goldenboy. You're as human as the rest of us now."

Jace sighed before grabbing a fistful of hair as he sank back down into the armchair in the corner of his best friend's room. "I just don't know what to do."

There was a moment of complete silence, the kind that hung with uncertainty between people trying to decide how to handle an uncomfortable situation. Alec had always been a coddler while Isabelle had always had a "rip-the-bandaid-off" mentality.

Vaguely, Jace wondered if all the women he had treated in the brushed-off way Clary had to him ever felt the way he did now. Forever wondering what could be and mourning a future that couldn't be pursued no matter how badly they wanted it. Guilt ran through him like a steady stream ever since he decided to change his outlook on life and these thoughts added to the flow of a gushing waterfall.

A soft hand touched his shoulder before red sharp nails tilted his head upward. "I know it doesn't seem like it but Clary is just as afraid of this as you are." Jace slowly lifted his eyes from there glued spot on the dark oak floor as they locked onto soft brown orbs. They were rich with life and absolutely beautiful, just like the girl who they belonged to. "She's dying, Jace." The boy flinched again, every time someone reminded him of the one thing that haunted him constantly it felt like a slap in the face. He was beginning to wonder if people forgot he knew that piece of crucial information. He hated when they brought it up. "She's afraid to love something that's so fleeting. She's afraid to care when the clock is ticking. She feels like she's being buried by the sand in an hourglass. She just doesn't want to make anyone sink down that dark hole with her."

Jace could see the tears beginning to build in Isabelle's eyes, they gathered quickly and fell just as fast. Jace barely caught one with his thumb before Isabelle sniffed and leaned back. And as if he had imagined the whole thing, her eyes were clear again. A cloud of indifference masking her pain. And if it weren't for the tear clinging to his thump pad, he'd say the whole day had been a dream.

He sat in the car idling outside his house. The lights were on and steam billowed it's way in an inky smoke out of the chimney. For all intentions and purposes, it looked welcoming and warm. But Jace knew what laid behind that glass menagerie; tension and heartache. He didn't know if he was ready to walk back in, accept the old life he led and the truth on the computer screen in his father's office.

Leukemia.

Even talking about it in general put people on edge, let alone actually knowing someone who had it. People who live with the daunting knowledge everyday that the end was closer with every tomorrow.

He remembered once watching the sunrise with Clary, the feeling of that finite time. She had been shivering despite the four blankets he had thrown overtop her and the added heat from his body which was situated right beside her. His arm had laid across her shoulders almost gingerly, afraid to crush her. Any excuse to be close to her under the guise of assisting was a win in his book, no matter how desperate it made him sound. Her eyes seemed to wait anxiously for the rising sun. The rays shined across the dewy grass and made the vapor that hung between their open mouths visible. He hadn't taken his eyes off her as the sun lit up Clary's pallor skin in bright hues of pink, purple, and orange against the dark blue sky. Her eyes glowed even brighter than the world around them and he thought he must have been mistaken when he saw the melancholy expression in her gaze. And when she had turned that vibrate smile to him across rose lips, he knew he had to have been mistaken. But it made sense now, watching as another tomorrow approached and another yesterday ended. Feeling an eternity of everything that was leading to a straight path of total darkness. Not even Clary's positive energy could hide her fear now; of the unknown, of a world with her no longer in it.

Jace swallowing a dry sob, water tried to leak from his eyes but he refused to let it fall. Much like Isabelle, he forced a distance between himself and his emotions. Life was easier that way, he found. That was also the life he had led carefree before Clary had stumbled along; dotting and leaving splashes of color in her wake. Ruining the perfect world of black and white he created with a simple turn of her smile and a press of her finger. Her hair left red lines in his mind as she danced her way through his life and destroyed the shields he had carefully constructed through years of conditioning.

And he wouldn't look back, he could see in color now. And it was because of her.

His feelings were too strong to ignore and she felt them too. He knew from the way her mouth had formed to his slick with rain, the quick and soft gasp she had let out before her fingers had slid through his hair, her book completely forgotten about.

His hand was on the gear shift before he really even thought it through. No thinking, no waiting. Just taking the leap. Taking a shot in the dark when the odds are against you.

Blind faith.

Like Clary had.

The roar of the engine from his car, powered to life when he turned the key. This time he would take his car instead of running, he wasn't in much of the mood to go sprinting through this icy rain any sooner than he had too.

He didn't think much of anything besides Clary as he hurled his way up the driveway, stopping just shy of a book soaked through with rain. He grinned a moment before running toward the top steps on her porch, grabbing the sodden novel on his way.

He softly twisted the paperback as his right hand moved of it's own accord to the door. He could almost feel her energy from where he stood tipping back and forth on the heels of his shoes.

Clary blinked up at him as she swung the door open, she sighed a moment before stepping out into the cold and shutting the door behind her. The sound of the rain hitting the top of the roof was astonishingly loud. Or maybe it was the sound of his heart beat, making it's way up his throat as she looked at him.

Large green eyes regarded him with concern and caution. As if she wished to comfort him but also didn't want to give him the wrong idea. "Jace—"

"I don't want this!" Jace yelled out, his arms moving away from his body in a motion that gave him wings.

Clary blinked in confusion, the softest wrinkle laid between her sharp eyebrows, something he wished so vehemently that he could smooth out. "Don't want what...?"

Her voice was soft and cool like the moments before a storm hits.

"This...this title!" He screamed as if there was thunder drowning his voice out rather than just the sounds of the soft rain drops hitting the ground. "Not if it means giving you up." He stared down into the eyes that managed to make his seemingly dead heart beat. "I don't want it if I can't have you."

She blinked slowly as if her mind wasn't really catching up with the words that were passing through her ears. Her dark red eyelashes glistened under the light of the porch steps.

"You were fine before—" Her voice was hesitant, almost as if she was still in a state of confusion. As if for once she didn't know how to form the proper words.

"That's because I wasn't awake yet." Jace closed those last few steps of distance between them, her soaking wet book still hanging from his hand. "Don't you know? Can't you see what you did? You woke me up, Clary." The book made a thud against the wood of the porch as his fingers curled around her small arms.

Clary shook her head slowly as if still unable to comprehend. "No," she spoke slowly as if letting her mouth shape the words first before they fell out. "I've been a burden."

"Yes!" Jace laughed as he threw his head back and let her go. "You walked in the rain without a coat, you quote famous and cryptic sayings from famous people, you give to everyone around you no matter how big or small, you stand up for what you believe to be right, you vandalize boring and forgotten buildings, and you walk through life without a care in the world completely in your own mind." Jace seemed almost hysterical as he stepped away from her unblinking gaze, her plump lips were opened wide. "You were the biggest mistake I ever made," He laughed again as he took another step back. "And I don't regret you one bit."

Clary continued to stare before she bit her bottom lip as if to keep a large smile at bay. It only resulted in making her rosy lips redder. Jace took that as a sign to continue. "You are the biggest burden in my life and I wouldn't change a thing."

Clary suddenly tilted her head back and laughed, a sound so pleasing to the ear Jace wished he could record it and play it all the time if not just to keep him sane. "This is the strangest and most insulting declaration of affection I have ever gotten."

Jace smiled at her as the rain enveloped him again. Just like last week, just like the day he met her, just like the year she had stumbled into this messed up town and into that messed up school and finally into his messed up life. "I don't know," he shrugged as he started at her. "All I know is I'm crazy about you, Clary, and if I have to I'll tell you everyday until it's all you can hear." He shrugged, hair wet with rain. "I can be just as persistent as you."

Clary giggled again before hurtling her body towards him and throwing her small frame into his. "That sounds like a good plan, Golden Boy." Her mouth was on his before he even could think of a way to tell her he absolutely hated that nickname.

Review, Angels!