How I envision mornings at Hellsing =D

The iron maiden woke slowly, stretching her arms above her head and arching up until she was satisfied. She turned her head to the side and blinked drowsily. The curtains cast a dull, cosy orange light over the room and Integra Wingate's Hellsing sighed and she sank back into her pillow. There was no need to hurry, she could have just another five…maybe ten minutes rest. Decision made she closed her eyes again, smiling over her small victory.

This however was Hellsing, and so lie-in's, were not permitted. She squeezed her eyes tight shut. Maybe if I don't reply, he'll go away...

"Tsc tsc master, tis morning." The smooth voice came from the end of her bed and she tried in desperation to ignore it. Go away, go away, go away, go away go aw…

"Is my presence truly that unwanted?" He mocked, pretending to be hurt, his eyes wide.

She didn't respond and he stood from the chair he was currently sat in. "Master?" Nothing. "my controller? My boss? My teacher? The big cheese?" Nothing still, yet he could sense her agitation growing.

Suddenly he was there, his nose tickling her chin, his breath cool against her pale neck. "Or is your lack of response a silent plea?"

That did it. She growled, shoving as hard she could. He fell back, if only to amuse her, as she shook of the covers and lunged at him all in one go. Grasping the front of his shirt she yanked him up so their noses were centimetres apart.

"Now listen here Santa-Jaws, you know dam we…"

"Santa Jaws?"

…"You wear red."

"Ah, continue please."

"DAM well I am a not a morning person. I am punctual, busy, easily aggravated, a women whom has earned the title of the leader of the Hellsing organisation and controller of YOUR sorry arse! However I am not in this world, nor any other that exists outside our universe or even in that sick little brain of yours, a MORNING PERSON!"

She finished, breathing heavily and just a tad annoyed that his bloody smirk was still there.

"A moving speech if ever I heard one, however." Now it was he who pushed her back. She never let go of the front of his shirt so instead he grabbed both her legs, pulling them either side of him as he pushed her back down to the bed and planting his hands firmly either side of her head.

"If I am not mistaken you said busy in that speech. And such a busy women surely should not be sleeping when she could be addressing that large pile of papers on her desk."

The memory of those papers rushed back and Integra grimaced, burying her face in her hands.

"Huge , massive really. God knows how you'll ever even finish it!"

"Alucaaarrrd!" She growled.

He stopped and she pulled her hands away, only to feel a warmth spread to her face at how close he was, his smirk inches from her mouth. "Say my name again master."

She stared at him, dead pan. "Dog."

Silence… "Well played."

She was about to groan in frustration but remembered this would not help the situation. Despite this he still laughed. "You can groan if you wis…"

"Alucard." She cut him off abruptly. "What do you want."

He stopped, frowning out of genuine confusion this time. "In the long run? Or for my birthday? Because there's this puppy I saw the other day and…"

"Now you idiot! To let me sleep some more!"
"In all seriousness I cannot describe to you the cuteness of this dog master."

"Alucard?"

"Floppy ears, black button nose, it even bit the puppy next to it! Oh it was adorable!"
"ALUCARD!"

"Hmmm?"

"I want so sleep."

He stopped and thought for a few seconds. "I suppose if I were to sleep…next to you, I would be able to wake you at the appropriate time."

She frowned. "I thought you slept in a coffin."

He stared dead pan back at her. "Ya know, I think I can make an exception this time."

She snorted. "Very well, however if your hands so much as stray an inch I swear! I'll flay you, have Walter cook you and then send you in a hamper basket to the pope to enjoy for lunch. See how well you regenerate when in his stomach."

He grinned. "Of course master.

He rolled of her and she stood, standing at the top of the bed as he readjusted the covers.

"By the way, I forgot to mention before but I like your pajamas."

"Hmm?" She looked down at herself. A long blue shirt unbuttoned at the top hung on her slender frame, just about covering her matching shorts which were currently revealing far more leg than she was comfortable with. She was suddenly nervous at the realisation of the thin material, lack of clothing beneath it and the thought of lying next to Alucard. However she'd be dammed if she'd showed him that. As subtlety as possible she crossed her arms tightly cross her chest.

"Better than yours."

Doing her best to cover her top half as much as possible she wriggled down beneath the covers.

"Oh, yes, that reminds me." She paused to watch, astounded as her pet vampire phased out of his clothes, and was left standing in black boxer shorts with tiny red hearts all over them.

She turned quickly onto her other side. "Oh no you don't, at least put on a bloody top."

There was a low growling sound behind her. "I don't like wearing tops to bed."

"Well do you like the current location of balls? Because if there's a problem I sure they can be relocated to your mouth!"

There was silence and then some shuffling. She held her breath and waited. He shuffled beneath the covers and stopped. She let out her breath and smiled to herself. It was too soon though. Suddenly a hand had ensnared her via the waist and a large body was pressed up behind her.

"The pope, Alucard, the pope." She threatened. Panicking slightly her hands went to his.

He chuckled. "My hands will not stray from this position, you have my word master. Unless of course you wish them to later on, in which case I will certainly make short work of the paper thin fabric you call clothing." He hissed in her ear.

She did her best to ignore this comment, instead shuffling around a bit to get comply.

"If you continue to move against me like that, you might just wear away your shirt all by yourself!"

She growled. "Alucard."

He nuzzled her neck with his face and closed his eyes, still smirking.

"Good morning master."

She sighed, shuffling one last time and then closing her own eyes. "Good morning servant."

…"Oh master."

"Whaaaat!" She snarled.

"I forgot to say this earlier, the fat man's here."

"…what fat man…."

"The one from the knights of the round-about…come to think of it, that's why I came to get you in the first place!"

….."I despise you."