A/N: The whole "abandoned" thing made the story look really sad, didn't it? I decided to make an epilogue, just to round it up nicely. If you guys are into it, I can make a FAQ too! Just review me some questions and they shall be answered. I like that stuff. :)

Cat, you assface.

Since you're not answering me on Whatsapp and we haven't skyped in weeks, I'm afraid I have to tell you this via email. I'll try to sum up the story the best I can, but no guarantees. It's not fair that you had to go to stupid Prague! I don't care about student exchange whatever. A year is too fucking long and I miss you and your stupid giggles.

So, this week was weird as fuck. In a good way. You know that when I start swearing a lot, things are either great or terrible, and this time it's the former. Let's begin with the news that started it all. You ready? Are you? Here goes...

I GOT INTO TEXAS TECH. Yes. It's almost surreal - college, dude! Fucking COLLEGE! All that was missing was you to freak out with me. I'm sure you saw it on The Slap, but just in case you've been way too busy with your stuff and things, everyone else is growing up too. Robbie got into USF and he's moving to San Francisco tomorrow. He already found what he described as a "puppet-friendly location" to live in, and trust me, I don't wanna know much more. Beck is an ass and said he doesn't want to go to college, but get this - he got a part in that new movie, Blacklands. It's not huge, he's just one of the three hooded boys who scare the neighborhood kids, but it's still pretty cool. I read the book, and man oh man am I excited to see it on screen. Anyway, Andre was accepted in Syracuse University, so he'll be livin' the dream in New York, and Tori got into James Madison.

Am I upset that she and I are gonna do the long-distance thing? Yep. So is she. My best damn friend is in FUCKING PRAGUE, and now I'm gonna be in Texas and my girlfriend in Virginia... Yeah, I don't like it. However, I'm trying to be more Cat-like and see the positives here, which actually brings me to Monday.

Oh man, Monday.

So Tori and I went pen-shopping - yes, very romantic, but we needed pens and notebooks and I needed a new bag and we knew we'd be in dire need of ice cream by the time we were finished, so it seemed like a thing to do together. Stuff was bought, ice cream was eaten, and we went to hang out at her place for a while. Of course, as I mentioned before, all the college talk started to make us really emotional, and she cried a little cause she's a big old wuss... Aaand I decided to be positive and shit, so I convinced her to open a bottle of cheap supermarket champagne, and we got a little drunk. Not stupid drunk, just a little slurry and dizzy and less inhibited.

So... Well, to cut it short, we almost had sex. Nope, we didn't actually do it. At the last minute I froze up, kept my panties on, and we ended up just making out a lot. But that was Monday. And as soon as she left, I kept wondering why in the name of fuckity fuck I didn't actually let it happen. Remember the first time I touched Beck's equipment, how I was like "dude, this is way too weird, nope" and let go? Remember how I regretted it afterward? That's pretty much exactly what happened.

You know what that means, right?

I was nervous. Yes. Kind of silly, yes. But it had nothing to do with what happened that night after Sikowitz's place.

YOU CAN'T IMAGINE HOW MUCH I SMILED WHEN I REALIZED THAT. LIKE. DUDE. AFTER A YEAR AND A HALF OF FUCKING HAVING THAT SHITFACE ASSHOLE IN THE BACK OF MY HEAD EVERY TIME TORI TRIED TO GO A LITTLE FURTHER, IT WAS FINALLY JUST ME. NOT EVEN A LITTLE BIT OF HIM. JUST. ME.

Sorry for the screams, I'm just pretty proud of myself. I even told Tanya that. She chuckled and said I was the cutest badass she'd ever seen.

So naturally we met up again last night. And... Well, let's just say it's a lot different with ladies. Don't worry, I won't gross you out with the details, I know you're still weird about the whole sex stuff. But it happened, and it was awkward and pausey but it was also amazing. She got all cute and cuddly afterwards.

Remember when you turned eight, when you had a surprise party at school and another at home, and you turned to me and yelled "I can't deal with all the happy"? That's pretty much me right now. College. Getting out of my father's house (I'll fill you in on the dorm life as soon as it begins; expect rants about having to share a bathroom with strangers). Finally doing stuff with Tori. Finally getting Sinjin out of my head. Holy shit, so much happy.

I really do miss you like crazy, though. Next week I'm moving to Texas and I've started unpacking my room already, because we all know I'm the slowest, laziest packer in all the land. You won't believe what I found... That big yellow bow you used to wear on your head! It's around Bugs's neck now. I'm attaching a picture. Such a cute, fancy rabbit.

I love you, you little fuck. If you don't respond to this email until tomorrow, I am flyinh to Prague solely to kick your ass. And then kidnap you.

Jade