I search your profile for a translation

I study the conversation like a map

'cause I know there is strength in the differences between us

and I know there is comfort where we overlap

Epilogue

Castle's buzzing, and Kate's enjoying watching him zip around, making sure everything is perfect. "So- we're not telling them, right?" he confirms, for the third time in ten minutes. He takes a tray of burgers from the fridge, setting it next to the salads, before pulling glasses from the cupboards.

This time, though, it's Martha who answers. "I don't know who the two of you think you're going to be kidding," she tells them. "You're talking about fooling two trained detectives. All I can say is that being in love has compromised your intelligence if either of you think you can hide your relationship from them with the smitten glow that is emitting from each of you."

"Thank you, Mother," Rick grimaces, and Martha shrugs, leaving the kitchen with a flourish of her hand.

"We're not telling them," Kate confirms. "Not yet. Let's just enjoy having everyone here for the weekend without making any grand statements. Besides- it will be good practice for when we're at work next week and have to go all day without touching each other." She smirks, watching Castle's face fall.

"Although… at the precinct… maybe in the elevator?"

"You've put way too much thought into this already," she tells him.

He shrugs and grins. "I like to be prepared. But okay. No touching at work next week. Except in the elevator. Noted." He looks at her in sudden confusion. "You're… tall."

"What?" Kate glares at him, but something thrills inside her.

Castle looks her up and down, noticing properly for the first time for the first time since she strode downstairs and into the kitchen ten minutes ago. "You… you're wearing heels!" he exclaims in delight, and she laughs.

"Seemed like time," she explains, wrinkling her nose at him shyly.

Castle laughs, meeting her in a hug, and kissing her hair. "Let's get this stuff out to the grill by the pool house."

"Have all the rooms been set up?" Kate asks, kicking herself as she does so. Now she's the one getting wound up. She's already asked this- Castle's enthusiasm is obviously catching. She finds herself not caring. She's ready to go with it, and she's just as excited as he is to see their friends again.

"Uh-huh," Castle nods. He pulls Kate to him, kissing her on the mouth. "On the other side of the floor so that none of them will see you and I going into the same room."

Alexis rolls her eyes as she comes in and flops down onto one of the bar stools. "Are you two still doing this? Haven't you been dating for the entire summer now? And you seriously haven't told anyone?" She narrows her eyes at Kate. "Not even your Dad?"

Kate swallows. "No. Not even my Dad." She casts an anxious look at Castle, who squeezes her hand. "Ugh- should we even be doing this? I go back to work next week- we could just see everyone in the city then."

"Too late," trills Martha, returning to the living room. "Because you two have guests- I just saw the first car pull up."

"You weren't kidding!" The first words out of Lanie's mouth belie her calm demeanour as she hugs Kate and whispers in her ear. She looks around, and her eyes widen. "This place is amazing. You really weren't kidding."

Kate hugs her friend back. "It's good to see you, Lanie."

"You and I are gonna have words," Lanie promises as Esposito nudges her out of the way and zeroes in on Kate.

"He been treating you well?" he asks her as he hugs her.

Kate returns the hug. "You have nothing to worry about, Espo," she tells him.

On the other side of the car, Castle is pulling Lanie and Esposito's overnight bags from the trunk as another car drives up, and Ryan and Jenny get out. Kate hugs each of them, but her attention is pulled away at the sound of the third car approaching. Jim's sedan makes it's way up the driveway and she smiles. It's been almost two months since her Dad had told her to trust herself, and even though she hasn't said anything to him in any of their phone calls, she suspects her father will be the first to realise there's been a change in her relationship with Castle.

Castle's the first to reach her father, shaking his hand and clapping a hand around his back as he welcomes the man. Then it's her turn, and she hugs her father, letting him hold her tight. "Katie," he beams at her.

"Hey, Dad," she replies softly as he steps back to take a look at her.

He shakes his head in disbelief. "I don't know what Rick's being doing-" there's a twinkle in his eye as he jokes- "and I don't want to know- but you look great, Katie. Wonderful."

She shrugs. "I put on the weight I lost in hospital," she tells him. "Castle's a great cook."

"I see." Her father regards her with a dry look. "And I suppose it was his cooking that put the smile back on your face, too."

"Not now, Dad," she blushes, looking around, and Jim chuckles, evidently satisfied that he's been proven right.

"I can take this," she says, and picks up her father's bag to see Ryan glaring at her. "Something to say, Ryan?"

"Uh. No. Just- should you be carrying that?"

"I'm back on active duty from next week," she reminds him. "So as your boss, you better hope I should be carrying this."

Ryan shrugs sheepishly, and she doesn't miss the glare Esposito throws his way, or the way that Jenny moves protectively around Ryan, taking his hand. She grins. She's missed this. The family dynamic that they all share.

Kate and Castle make their way inside with their five guests, all of whom fall silent when they look around at the entrance hall. Kate looks around too, remembering how daunting this place seemed when she arrived. Castle leads the way up the stairs, apparently oblivious to the state of overwhelm, and Kate's reminded again of how different it is when they're all in the city together. She shrugs. It's just a weekend, and the team and her father will get used to it; she has.

"So, where's your room, sweetie?" Lanie asks, and Kate gulps. "Can I see the other side of the floor?" Kate can only hear curiosity in her friend's voice and she bites her lip. Damn. This is going to be harder than she thought. She'd counted on avoiding the topic, and she'd counted on hiding her relationship with Castle- she'd gone years without touching him, so she's sure that she can manage a weekend with their friends, but this is already starting to feel like lying rather than avoiding.

"My swimsuit is downstairs at the pool already, so I'll show you later," she tells Lanie.

"So, girl," Lanie continues as they walk down the stairs to join the others at the pool. "How has it been? I'm guessing that since you've stopped calling me at two in the morning on a regular basis, things are going well?"

"Yeah," Kate smiles. "Really well."

"And just how well is really well?" Lanie pushes, and Kate rolls her eyes.

"I'm… relaxed, okay? I've been walking every day, doing yoga every day. I can't do as many push ups as I could before I was… hurt… but I'm getting there- I'm close to full strength."

Lanie laughs. "Work-outs. Right. And just how much does writer boy have to do with this state of relaxation?" she teases.

"Well- it's his place, Lanie. I've been seeing a lot of him."

"I just bet you have," Lanie replies dryly, and Kate scowls at her friend.

"We're here," she says, turning into the pool house. Esposito and Ryan are already in the water, and Jenny's sitting on the edge of the pool, dangling her feet over the edge. Jim and Martha are both on deck chairs, and Alexis is helping her father arrange drinks for everyone.

Lanie makes a beeline for whatever cocktail Alexis is handing out, and Kate laughs. "Long car ride, Lanie?"

"You said it," her friend replies. "Two hours in a car with Javi- I have been hanging out for this."

"Yo, Beckett. What's Lanie telling you?" Esposito calls out, and Kate laughs. It's the first time anyone has called her Beckett for two months, and she thinks she's ready to be Beckett again, even if she's not quite there yet.

"I'm just telling it how it is," Lanie proclaims, taking an appreciative sip of the mojito, before taking Alexis' arm and pulling the girl over to one of the benches. Alexis shoots Kate a panicked look, and Kate curses to herself. Alexis. She's the weak link, and Lanie's headed straight in for the kill.

Castle catches the panicked look in his daughter's eyes, and glances at Kate. She looks; well less terrified than he thought she might, but she's just shaking her head and taking a cocktail from the tray Alexis has discarded, so he guesses she's okay. She sips her drinks, watching the boys in the pool, before sitting down next to her Dad and Martha.

"So what have you been up to this summer?" Jim asks his daughter.

Kate glances at Castle. "Movies. And TV shows. Oh, and-" she bursts into laughter. "Castle and I watched a tonne of Temptation Lane."

Jim raises his eyebrows at Castle. "And you didn't call me and ask me to take her back to the cabin? You must have it bad, son,"

Castle chuckles, and sits next to Kate. Martha is indignant, however, and he's soon cringing. "I'll have you know that I played my part in the long and rich history of Temptation Lane, when Richard was a child. My character married Joseph Fox." Martha counts each event off on her fingers. "She was kidnapped, buried alive, trapped in a cave with bears, uh, kidnapped again, and held hostage in the sewers of Paris."

Jim's eyes widen. "How long were you on the show?"

"Three weeks," Martha nods dismissively, and Jim shrugs.

"Well, Katie and her Mom always did love watching that show," he offers, and Kate and Castle breath a sigh of relief.

Kate closes her eyes, and Castle gazes at her. He so wishes he could just reach out, take her hand… "Quit staring at me, Castle," she tells him without opening her eyes.

"How-"

"I always know," she smirks. "So stop being creepy and go start the grill, okay?"

Kate changes into her swimsuit. She's been wearing the same one Alexis gave her all summer, and she figures she owes the girl one. And while she's at it, she thinks she'll buy herself a few as well- the navy is wearing awfully thin. Her bruises are nothing but a memory now. Likewise, the scars are no longer the angry shock they once were; the red lines have already faded to a more discreet pink. Still, she figures it's going to be a long time before she's comfortable wearing anything but a one piece. If ever.

There's a knock on the door, and Kate opens it, surprised to find Castle on the other side of the door. He squeezes into the gap between the door and the frame in spite of Kate's laughter as she tries to shoo him out.

"I missed you," he tells her, pressing his mouth to hers.

She chuckles, and kisses him back. "What- for the five minutes we were with our friends?" she asks him. "You can't be in here. They're going to get suspicious."

"Everyone's already suspicious," he says, shrugging. "And this is way more important."

"What-" Kate starts to ask, but she's cut off when he kisses her, hard, pushing her against the bathroom tile. She kisses him back, breathing in sharply as he bites on her lower lip before sliding his tongue into her mouth. "We can't-" she manages, but she's finding it harder and harder to resist Castle's advances.

Castle's hands make their way into her hair, and he dips his mouth to her neck. She leans her head back, giving in entirely as he presses her against the tiles, his leg nudging between her thighs and moving against her- right where she wants him, but oh-god, it's not enough, and she wraps her arms around him, pulling him closer to her, and moaning as his left hand makes its way into the top of her bathing suit, his right hand undoing the ties behind her neck and pushing the one piece back down.

"So- you're going to have to take your clothes off too, if you're planning on doing what I'm planning on you doing," she suggests, and he nods, taking his shirt off before kneeling down to pull her swimsuit all the way down. It puddles on the floor at her feet and Castle kisses his way up her thighs. Things escalate quickly after that- Kate's semi-aware that the bathroom by the pool is probably not the best place for this, but she's past caring by the time Castle's standing again, pressing against her, his mouth meeting her own.

"Well." Castle clears his throat. "So, I- uh- just came in here to tell you I'm going to get started with the burgers."

Kate chuckles. "Thanks for the, uh- heads up?" she manages, still leaning against the wall, but sinking down a little, her legs not quite able to carry her for the moment.

Castle laughs, leaning against her and kissing her. "Do you think they heard anything?" he asks, tilting his head and indicating their friends outside.

"Considering my Dad is there, not to mention your Mom, and your daughter?" Kate raises her eyebrows at him. "I hope not."

Castle laughs again, and walks over to the sink to wash his hands, before pulling his clothes back on, turning to beam at her. "Kate? I love you."

Kate stills, staring at him. "What did you say?"

It's Castle's turn to look back at her in confusion. "I… love you. Kate?"

"You've said that before?" she asks, and he frowns.

"Yes?"

She waves an impatient hand at him. "I- I know you've said that- here in the Hamptons. But- I just felt like I'd heard it before."

Castle hesitates. "I… said it. Once before."

"What?" Kate's frowning. "When? Why do I remember this, but not remember?"

He sighs, leaning against the wall, closing his eyes. "I- uh- I said it. In the cemetery."

"Oh," she whispers. Castle shrugs at her, his eyes full of compassion, and she rolls her eyes and wipes her cheek, surprised to find tears. She smiles up at him ruefully. "I think I kind of remember."

Castle embraces her, and she laughs at the absurdity of it all; having this conversation in a bathroom, still naked, while Castle is fully clothed again. "Are you okay?" he asks.

Kate shrugs. "I think so?" she says uncertainly, and he cups her face in his hands, kissing her forehead, then mouth. "I think I really am okay," she says. "I guess- maybe I'll remember the shooting itself, in time?" She chuckles wryly. "Then I might not be so okay."

"Kate," he sighs.

Kate smiles at him. "I'm okay," she tells him. "So, Go. Discreetly. I'll get cleaned up here and be out in a minute."

"When I am ever not discreet?" he smirks at her, and she presses a last kiss against his mouth before waving him out and turning the shower on. She makes a face at herself in the mirror. Remembering. She remembers fear in his eyes, his words hovering over her, like she could snatch them up, if only she could move. She still doesn't remember being shot, or falling, but she remembers laying there, stricken on the ground, while Castle watched her close her eyes.

Kate sighs. So much for taking five minutes to put her swimsuit on. She stands in the shower, her hands on the tiles, letting the water rush over her. These memories are what Castle carries with him. She wipes her eyes again, newly determined. They have to put this to rest, finish it. For both their sakes.

Kate steps out of the shower and towels off, before stepping into her swimsuit again, and checking her reflection in the mirror. She's good to go.

"Katherine Beckett!" calls Lanie indignantly, and Castle turns to see Kate stepping out the pool house bathroom. Her cheeks are still flushed, but her eyes are dry. He guesses they'll have a chance to talk tonight, about what she's remembered. She's got the bathing suit back on; no way is he letting her give that back to his daughter after what they just did; and she has a sarong wrapped around her waist. "Where have you been?" he overhears Lanie demand, and Kate shrugs, losing the sarong and sliding into the pool.

Castle watches her for a second before turning to Jim. "Ready?" he asks.

"Ready," the older man confirms, turning the grill on and handing Castle the burgers.

They cook in silence for a while, Castle wondering what Jim has worked out about his relationship with his daughter. Castle's a fan of scotch, rather than beer, but he finds himself wishing Kate's father drank so they could be grilling together with a beer in their hands. He flips the burgers, watching as Kate swims up and down the pool, avoiding Esposito and Ryan when they try and dunk her, then teaming up with Esposito to push Ryan under.

"She's happy," Jim says suddenly, and Castle turns to him.

"She… yeah," he says. "I think she is."

"I know she is," Jim replies.

"It's been a good summer," Castle elaborates. "I can't quite believe it's almost over. I kind of still can't believe she agreed to come with me."

"I'm glad she did. I think she would have gone crazy listening to the cicadas in the cabin with me this whole time. She's like a different person," Jim agrees. "Have your mother and Alexis been here the whole time?" he asks.

"My mother? No. She's spent the odd weekend here, but that's all. Alexis has been here most of the time, though," he says. "She visited her mother in California for a couple of weeks, and spent some time in the city with her boyfriend." He winces, thinking about it. Alexis had gone out to California to see Ashley- under the pretence of visiting with her mother- but it had been a sullen teenager who had returned. Ashley hadn't had as much time for Alexis as he'd said he would, and when he'd seen his credit card bill he'd nearly had a heart attack. Evidently Meredith's way of dealing with a heartbroken teenager was to shop, and he been left wishing she'd been a little bit more practical about solving that kind of thing the old fashioned way- with a carton of chocolate ice cream.

Jim nods. "It's hard when your baby girl grows up," he tells Castle, with a meaningful look. "Whether she's still a teenager, or thirty one."

Alexis hands Kate a plate with salad and a burger with a guilty look. "What's up?" Kate asks her.

"Lanie… kind of cornered me," the teenager admits. "And I don't think I gave too much away, but she's definitely at least a little suspicious that there's something going on with you and Dad."

Kate smiles. "Don't worry about it, Alexis."

Alexis smiles back. "Okay. And Kate? I'm glad you came here for the summer. You make him happy, you know?"

Kate shrugs awkwardly. "He makes me happy too." She laughs. "Just… try not to tell Lanie anything else, okay?"

She sits down at the table that Castle's moved to the patio by the pool. The early evening sun is casting long shadows, but Kate can already tell that the days are starting to get a little shorter. She wonders what this place is like in the winter- does it snow? She smiles to herself, when she realises that she'll probably have the chance to find out.

"A toast," calls Martha, and Kate smirks. The red head busies herself filling the glasses that are empty, and Kate's pleased to see her pour sparkling water in Jim's wine glass. Castle has obviously given her a heads up. "To friends," she announces, and everyone raises their glasses.

Kate slices into her burger, suddenly starving, and reaches for the ketchup. "So, Beckett, this is how the other half lives, huh?" Kate smiles at Ryan's gentle ribbing, and laughs as she sees Jenny gently nudge him.

"Staying here has been pretty great," she agrees, after taking a bite of a piece of her meal.

"How are you feeling about going back to work?" Jenny asks, pushing the pasta salad that Alexis made onto her fork.

Kate nods. "Okay. I think. But a little nervous. This new Captain- how is she?"

Ryan makes a face. "Iron Gates? She's as by the book as they come. She cut her teeth as a detective in Internal Affairs."

"That's not going to win her any popularity points," Kate agrees. Is the Captain really all that bad?

"Doubt she's going to want your boy hanging around," Esposito adds, giving her the thumbs down, and Kate winces. She needs Castle. Surely it won't take much to prove to this new Captain that he's an asset to the team?

"Don't worry, Beckett," Castle speaks up from the other end of the table. "I still have the mayor on speed dial if we need him to pull a few strings for us."

She nods, hoping it won't come to that. "And how's the investigation going?" she asks, and everyone falls silent. "Guys," she says. "Come on. I'm allowed to ask."

"Yeah," says Ryan. "But until now you haven't. We kind of figured you didn't want to know."

"I didn't," Kate admits. "I didn't want to think about it." She knows Castle's asked the guys for updates, and she's deliberately ignored him when he's been on the phone with either of them. "I had other things on my mind," she says.

"I just bet you did," teases Lanie, and she looks up and catches her friend's eye, glad for the levity the comment brought even if she has to feign annoyance before turning back to the meal before her.

"How are you feeling about going back to work?" Castle asks her later when they're alone in the kitchen, beginning the clean up. Everyone else is still outside, and Kate's glad for a moment to themselves.

She makes a face as she stacks the plates into the dishwasher, and considers. "I'm not sure. I'm kind of scared of the summer ending," she says. "What we've had, here- what if we can't make it work when we're back in the city? What if the new Captain really doesn't let you stay? What if-"

"Kate." Castle cuts her off, reaching for her and stroking her arm. "Maybe we won't get to work together… maybe we'll implode... Or maybe we'll continue to be amazing."

"Maybe," she agrees unwillingly, and he folds her into a hug.

Kate relaxes into him, looking up to press her mouth against his. She'd intended it to be a light kiss, before getting back to their friends outside, but she finds herself deepening it, teasing her tongue between his lips and running her hands along his arms, and then down his back, pulling Castle closer to her.

They're interrupted when Alexis clears her throat, and Kate has a second to be glad it's just Alexis before she looks up.

"We- uh- it was getting cold outside, and I think everyone is getting ready to call it a night," Alexis offers apologetically, standing in front of everyone, and then Esposito finds his voice.

"If you can't do a better job of hiding your relationship than that, Castle's never gonna be allowed back at the precinct."

Kate rolls her eyes, and Martha chimes in. "Room full of detectives, Katherine and Richard, what did I say."

Castle grimaces at his mother and Lanie turns to Alexis. "You knew!" she exclaims, and Alexis blushes.

"Uh- yeah. I was sworn to secrecy," she concedes.

"Which obviously means nothing to you," grumbles Castle, "since you let everyone come in without checking whether or not the coast was clear."

Alexis shakes her head disparagingly. "Trust me, walking in on the two of you for the hundredth time this summer wasn't high on my to do list."

Kate blushes, burying her head in her hands in despair, and Ryan whistles. "Little Castle," he says, evidently impressed.

Martha shrugs, dismissing the situation with a wave of her hand, and heads upstairs. Alexis takes the opportunity to flee as well.

Jenny elbows Ryan, and the two of them leave as well, followed by Esposito and Lanie. "We're really going to talk," Lanie promises, and Kate nods. It sounds like a threat, but she can handle Lanie.

Kate and Castle are left standing alone in the kitchen with Jim, who has been smiling as he watches the exchange between his daughter and her friends.

"Javier is right," he says. "Neither of you are very good at hiding your relationship."

Kate shoots Castle a desperate look, but her boyfriend has his own look of terror on his face, and she smirks.

"Sir- I-"

Jim snorts. "Rick. You've been calling me Jim since we met- why don't you just take a moment and calm down."

Kate can't help herself, and she laughs. "Dad- I'm sorry I didn't tell you. We just- wanted to wait. Take it slow."

"Take it slow, huh?" The twinkle in her father's eye belies his stern look as he continues. "If I didn't know better I'd say the two of you put the rest of us on the other side of the second floor for a reason."

Kate shakes her head, her cheeks flushing pink, and she sees Castle open his mouth and then close it again, thinking better of saying anything.

"Well- I see you two still have your glasses there," Jim says. "So I propose another toast." He fills his own glass with the last of the bottle of sparkling water. "To having the right people on your side," he shoots a smile at Kate, who smiles back and leans into Castle, meeting her father's eyes as she raises her glass again.

A/N: Many thanks to Trish for the beta of this chapter, and to Kel and Ky for their help in other chapters. To everyone that's been reading: thank you! I had this idea for ages, and I'm so pleased to have it done... from angst to fluff, in 14 chapters (the alt title?!) Reviews make me ridiculously happy! Hopefully it won't be too long before I have another fic in the works! And last but not least: props to all the ficathon writers! Now to catch up on my reading!