SM owns it.

Everytime I close my eyes

It's like a dark paradise

No one compares to you

I'm scared that you won't be waiting on the other side

Gods and Monsters

I take her hands, pulling her fingers away one by one.

I let the cold steel of the gun become my burden.

My sacrifice.

She doesn't resist.

Doesn't move.

She stares at me and my heart's in my throat.

Pounding.

Begging.

Demanding.

"Forgive me?"

Two words.

Two lives.

Two bullets.

I close my eyes and kiss her lips over and over as our tears mix and fall as one.

"Forgive me?" My forehead against hers, my heart scrambling to find a beat.

It's all or nothing.

Now or never.

Lose her forever or keep her always.

"Forgive me?" I open my eyes, green reflecting in her brown as she looks at me, lost and broken.

Two sides of the same coin.

A perfect match.

One soul.

"You and me." I promise her with a tear stained smile. "I can't live without you. You know that right?"

She stares, tears streaming, heart racing.

One more kiss. One last taste.

It's everything and nothing.

Beautiful torture.

"Forgive me?" I lift my hand, slow and steady.

I pull the trigger as she squeezes my hand.

I scream. Louder and harder because she knew. She squeezed my hand, my fingers.

She knew and she let me.

She punished me.

"You crazy bitch!" A laugh bubbles in my chest as life leaves her eyes. Taking mine with it.

Brown becomes black. Life becomes death.

The shot echoes in my head.

The smell of gunpowder burns my nose. The flame from the tip of the barrel burns my eyes and the sound of a bullet entering her skull breaks my heart.

Shatters it. Destroying any ounce of humanity I have left. Destroying me.

And I don't care. I don't want it. Not without her.

We both lost.

I let the gun swing on my finger and I fall to ground with her, cradling her head in my lap.

My fingers trace lines on her face. Committing every inch to memory.

Cherishing her.

Doing what I should have done years ago.

Meaning it.

"There's a hole in my chest. Always has been. I filled it with you. With your smile, with those big brown eyes of yours. Every kiss you gave me only made it bigger." I brush my fingers over her eyes, closing them, not wanting to see her death.

Not like this.

"You loved me through everything. I hated you for just as long." I take her pale face in my hands, kissing her pink lips. "I hated you, Isabella. Hated you for making me want you. Hated you for being so fucking beautiful. For sneaking into my head and my heart."

I laugh as I lift the gun, eyeing it as it shines in the rain. Looking at my hand, covered in blood, too steady for the act I've just committed.

"And now?" I look up at the sky. "Now I know pain. Emptiness. Loss. To lose the one thing that made you feel the world. To end it."

I wipe the blood from her cheek, kissing her over and over.

"I killed to protect you. To save your life. I killed for one more minute with you. For a lifetime of minutes." I lift her, bringing her to my chest, wishing she could consume a heart too broken for words.

"In the end it was you. Always you. You played my game, and you beat me." I kiss her blood stained temple, tasting what I've done and I wait.

I sit in silence with her in my arms, her face on my chest, my hands wrapped in hers.

I watch the lightning as it paints the sky in light and I cry.

I cry into her hair. I kiss every finger. Her ring.

I smile.

"Remember what I told you? The day before we got married? Nothing can tear us apart? That I'd follow you anywhere?"

I lay us down in the wet gravel, putting her arm across my stomach, her head on my chest and I watch the rain fall on us.

"You looked up at the stars and you kissed me. You told me as long as we had each other. As long as I never left you."

I run my fingers through her hair, kissing the top of her head as I press the gun to my temple. I scar myself the way I've scarred her.

I smile at how steady my hand is. How ready my heart is, and how easy the trigger gives.

"I love you."

And I follow her.

THE END

Thank you.

To everyone of you. Ham, Satan, every reader, every reviewer. All of you.

You took a chance on me and my story and words can not fully form to show you my appreciation. You are all amazing and I love you.