Standard disclaimer time: I do not own Once Upon a Time, or the characters from that show. I do not make any money off of this story. This is done purely for entertainment purposes, and because I can't stop thinking up Hook Belle ideas! XD
-Michelle
The dark night is miserable, with a storm so bad, it's waters have soaked everything within seconds of starting. Thick, heavy clouds fill the sky, obscuring the light of the moon and the stars. It's a night one could easily get lost in, the darkness so surrounding, even the best of navigators would have had trouble telling up from down.
If I had been at sea, I'd have been lost. Tossed around on forty foot waves, my ship with it's enchanted wood, struggling still to hold together and keep from being bashed apart by the storm. Instead I am landlocked, battered by worse than the storm.
The rain keeps on falling, pouring over me, getting past the layers of my clothes. I barely notice the cold of it on my skin, numb to everything but the fact of why I am out on a night like this. Of why I am rooted to the spot, standing in shadows, and staring up at her window.
The storm continues, the sky feeling as though it's sharing in my heart ache. I am as still as a statue, my eyes on a second floor window. Waiting for the light to come on, waiting for just a glimpse of her. But hour after hour has passed, not so much as her shadow passing by the window.
Though I am weary, I persist in waiting. I need to see her, need that stolen glimpse perhaps more than I need air to breathe. I tell myself I will be satisfied with just looking at her, but in my heart of hearts, I know that isn't true. I want to do more than look at her. I want to hold her. To touch and kiss her, to feel her embrace me back. I want for us both to make each other ready, then sink myself inside her, as we make slow, savoring love.
It's not going to happen. Even if I could hold myself back from a hard, frantic claiming, I know she won't let me anywhere near. Certainly not to speak with her, never mind to touch her. She's scared of me, scared of us. Terrified of the thing between us, the attraction she claims she doesn't feel. She's been running from me, from us, desperate to put distance to if not an outright end to our love. She doesn't understand that it won't be so easy, that I won't be deterred. Especially now. Especially now that I know she feels for me, that she remembers everything.
I didn't always know that. When her curse had first broke, when she was frightened and crying, the tears and panic allowed her to hide. She didn't even have to lie to me, simply too taken in the moment by her fear and her confusion, her panic and horror over what was happening, over what we had been in the middle of doing when her memories came flooding back.
I remember that moment, and the minutes leading up to it, as though it is happening now. It's simply that vivid in my mind, everything from the look in her eyes, to the feel of her body on top of mine. It was the instant our world came crashing apart at the seams, her beautiful blue eyes awash with frightened tears.
Seeing her like that, openly crying as she fought to scramble off of me? There hadn't been a doubt in my mind what had happened then. What she had finally remembered, even if neither of us understood just what had broken the curse at that time.
Just as unclear was whether or not she had remembered US, and the months we had spent together. The feelings that had blossomed amidst a soul jarring attraction. That night, so panicked was she, I simply couldn't tell, couldn't know if she was struggling with memories both old and new. I didn't help things, practically panicking in my own way. Grabbing at her in an attempt to calm and soothe both of us, my heart hammering just as hard as hers surely had,
She had fought even that, slapping at my shoulders, trying to squirm free. It had only made me cling harder to her, low sounds escaping me in an attempt to soothe the worst of her tears. Not even that had worked, and in a fit of absolute desperation, I had kissed her.
The kiss, by no means tame, was wild at best. Desperate and hungry, I was fighting for a chance, for us. Actually daring to hope in the miracle of true love's kiss. She didn't kiss me back, actually slicing my bottom lip open with her teeth. Even as blood dripped down my chin, I had tried to reach her. Tried and seemingly failed, her screams having sounded an alarm.
The wolf had then burst into the room, followed a few minutes later by the old woman. Granny who had never liked me, never approved of my continued association with her newest charge, had needed nothing more than to hear the screams before priming her weapon. I found myself looking down the barrel of a shot gun, and had to reluctantly hand over the girl.
The instant she was free, the wolf had thrown my coat at me. I suppose I was lucky that they had allowed me that much, and that the coat was long enough to cover me down to my knees. They certainly hadn't waited for me to find and dress in the rest of my clothes, forcing me away from her, away from the room.
I can remember standing out in the inn's hall, the coat open, my distress preventing me from bothering with buttoning it closed. I had kept trying to explain, had kept trying to dart past the wolf, almost not caring if Granny shot me. I had kept screaming her name, at times begging her to just listen to me. But she never came out of the room, never even came near the door.
I cringe even now, thinking, knowing how much she must have been suffering that night. The panic, the confusion, and yes I could even admit to the horror. As far as awakenings go, it wasn't the most pleasant, to wake up riding the very man who had shot you months ago. The very man who had once been nothing but a threat, locked in a blood feud that's causalities had spilled onto you.
I don't often regret things. Certainly I've never regretted the revenge I had been seeking. In the pursuit of that revenge, I had lied, stolen, and killed, manipulated and plotted, even cheated to get my way. I have used people, and that included her. I HAD hurt her, and took advantage of her cursed state, to foster first a friendship and then a relationship as lovers. I had intended to seduce her only to get back at him, at Rumplestiltskin. And never had I intended to actually come to care for her, to feel, to fall in love and have that love returned.
I know that love would never have come to be, if I hadn't done some terrible things. If I hadn't shot and cursed her in the first place. I'm not exactly ashamed, not even now. I'm still a greedy, grasping, take what he wants pirate. And what I want is her. I want her to look at me with that adoring look in her eyes. I want to see her soft smile, that genuinely delighted look she wore when greeting me. I want to hold and touch her, to savor and taste her. I want to take her away from here, to run to the farthest corners of this realm, to lock her away from all others, until she remembers and admits to the love we both feel for each other.
I want the future we had talked about. The future she had made me believe in and want. I want to live out my life at her side, and I refuse to take no for an answer. She can avoid me all she wants, but eventually? It will happen. My patience can last for only so long, I can wait only so long for her to come to grips with all that's happened, with the feelings and memories she has. It's up to her how this acceptance will happen. If it will be by her decision or mine. Until then, I can only wait, my patience fraying by the day, waiting for me to snap completely.
It's already so close to happening. With the light coming on in her room, it's all I can do to stay in the shadows. All I can do to not call out to her, not to try and climb that rain slick wall, and break into her room. I'm that much closer to committing another crime against her, wanting, needing to carry her off. But just like the nights before this one, I force myself to settle for looking at her. To savor the quick glimpse I get, when she appears at the window, casting a rightfully paranoid look outside.
Would she scream if she knew I was there, waiting in the shadows. Would she be frightened to know just how close I was to taking her away from everything she's ever known? Would she still fight my embrace, bite down in response to my fevered kisses? More than that I wonder how she can continue to run from me, from the love we have. A love I will confront her with, force her to face and accept it, accept me.
She's running out of options. I'll take the choice from her. I won't allow her to run to Rumplestiltskin's waiting arms, won't allow her to pretend her love for him is greater than the love she has for me. I'll make her remember how perfect we are together, how much better a person I became with her in my life. I'll make her recall the promises we whispered to each other, promises that I'll hold her to them.
I'll make her mine again, one way or the other. And there's not a damn thing anyone can do to stop me.
Ah...more a short prologue than anything. Been struggling to get this started all weekend. I tried an attempt where it was right before the curse broke...still a Hook first person POV. But then he got all lovey dovey sappy in his thoughts and it didn't feel right for the idea I had. I did want to start though with the moments leading into Belle getting her real memories back. But alas...*shrugs*
I also am trying to figure out how to handle the chapters following this one. I want to backtrack and set up how Hook and a cursed Belle met, and how the relationship developed into Hook actually falling in love with her and vice versa. Maybe it's just cause I'm uber tired right now, so can't think on how to handle the telling of the past.
Ah well, I'll figure it out eventually. This is meant to be a dark fic, though I don't know how dark it'll get. It's we shall see sort of thing, in terms of darkness. It also needs a title, though I'm calling it Hook's Stalker Obsession for now...Any title suggestions would be appreciated!
Laters!
-Michelle