Name: Broken and Unresponsive

Fandom: Percy Jackson and the Olympians

Type: Angst/Depression

Warnings:Depression, self harm, eating disorders, may be triggering

Disclaimer: All the characters belong to rick riordan, however, this story is entirely mine. The words written in italics are also Skillet's from their song which is the chapter title each time :)

Beta: The Wandering Oreo

AU: Percy and Annabeth were never together, and neither were pulled into Tartarus, instead the 8 demigods went back to camp (which is safe, see Red-Head Neusence) to gather more half-bloods and heal up before Athens.

A/N: This is going to be a proper story (hopefully). I've actually planned it out, and I'll be updating weekly every Saturday morning(EDT, Friday night GST, Friday evening EST, Friday afternoon PDT) It's Nicercy, but so much more that just fluff and angst. So please R&R. It's 13 chapters and I'm really proud of it. Please go and listen to the songs too, because they're amazing and so perfect or every chapter :D I'll be putting links at the top as well :)

Song: watch?v=uGcsIdGOuZY

Hero

Percy always came. Every night after dinner he would come to my cabin. He'd bring food that I didn't want, but he would make sure I ate at least half of it until he let up. He would stay until curfew and keep me company. He told me stories. Stories of his childhood, old greek myths, what was happening outside the walls I'd confined myself within. On the best nights he would tell me our stories; the ones of how we saved the world, when he saved me in the labyrinth, of my sister, and the stories of our quests.

But this night was different. This was one of the nights where he came in and found me crying on the floor.

I heard his voice first as he entered the cabin. Then I heard him leave the plate of food on a table and I felt his strong arms around my shoulders. Sobs racked my body and I lost control of my screams. I was so broken, Percy just held me until I was out of tears to shed and I was too week to move. He didn't let me go though.

I was propped up against a bed and he sat next to me, holding a cup. I watched as it slowly filled with water and Percy handed it to me. I took it in two hands and slowly sipped until there was no more.

"Thanks, Percy" I mumbled, handing it back to him. Then I saw the look on his face.

"Nico" he said "I know"

I felt my heart drop past my stomach to the soles of my feet. What did he know? There were so many things I was hiding from him. So many painful secrets it was hard to keep track of them all.

I didn't talk, just looked at him, a silent plea for him to stop. No such luck.

"Nico" he whispered "You didn't roll your sleeves down"
Before I could react I felt Percy's hand grab my wrist.

"I'm sorry" I said quickly. It wasn't totally a lie. I wasn't sorry I'd taken a blade to my skin, but I was sorry that he's seen the network of scars criss-crossing my arm.

"You're skin and bones" he whispered "You never eat, unless I make you, you rarely talk to me, let alone anyone else. You haven't left your cabin in a month. Nico. I care about you. Please. Talk to me. Do anything but this. Please"

I felt a tear fall onto my arm. It wasn't mine.

"I'm sorry" I tried again.

I closed my eyes, wishing the world away. But then I felt cool lips on my arm. "Please" a ghost of breath then another kiss "Please Nico" then again. Until he'd kissed every square inch of marred skin.

I felt tears prick my own eyes again. 'I'm sorry" I choked on the last word as I felt sobs take over my body again. I clutched onto Percy and felt his arms around me again.

Eventually I wiped the last tear from my eye and pulled away, looking anywhere else.

"Why?" his voice was soft now.

"I'm broken" I whispered back. "I can't be fixed, I can't be saved, I'm lost and the path back's been turned to rubble"

"No" his voice wasn't steady, but i was sure "Nico, you may be broken, but you can be fixed. I will fix you, or die trying. You're lost but I will lead you back and I'll save you. I'll be the one who saves you, No matter how long it'll take or how many relapses I'll save you"

"I need a hero to save me" I whispered

"Then I'll be a hero" he replied "But you need to tell me what's wrong first, you're broken for a reason. You're strong, it takes so much to brake someone that strong"

"I used to see the world as an amazing place. A place where I could be happy. But after discovering who I was. After I lost my sister I saw how cruel it could be" I stopped to wipe tears from my eyes, yet again, "Then the war; it was Just another war, just another family chore. I was expected to fight, so I did. But when I was in Tartarus I saw what war does. We weren't fighting monsters. We created them. They're down there and they can't die. They have to keep fighting an ancient war. And they are always fought with new faces. But there's no real point to it. A hero's not afraid to give his life but a hero shouldn't because it's expected. They should because it matters. But none of this matters. It's just another day in the world live"

"Then I'll save you from that" came Percy's voice, hitching on the 'that'. "Because there is something worth fighting for"

"Yeah" It sounded sarcastic, but at that point I didn't care. "What?"

He didn't answer for a while and I wiped my face on my shirt. Then I started to get angry. "WHAT?" I yelled at him.

He only whispered the answer, but I heard it.

"Love" then percy did something I couldn't have ever predicted. He leaned forward and kissed me.

It was short and only a peck, but I couldn't help but think about what it meant. Then I heard Percy scramble away from me to where he's discarded the plate of food what seemed like hours ago.

"You need to eat, Nico" he said, quickly, like he didn't want to talk about what had just happened. But I didn't really want to either, so I just let it drop, but I knew that it would nag at me when he left.

"I'm not hungry" my standard response. It wasn't that I didn't want to eat, I just couldn't force myself to shove so many calories down my throat.

"Yes you are" he said, then gave me the plate. I started slowly picking at it and Percy watched to make sure I swallowed.

After a while when I couldn't stomach any more I discarded the plate on the floor.

"I should go" percy drawled "It's getting to curfew and the Harpies will be out soon"

I nodded and he left, taking the leftovers with him. I heard him open the door to leave and I called out to him.

"Wait" I said. I managed to get up and walk towards where he would be. I met him halfway. I wrapped my arms around him quickly and whispered into his hair. "Thank you"

Then I went back to my bed without even looking back.

~Hero~

I don't know what time it was, but it was late. And I'd woken up panting from some dream. Well, nightmare was a better term for it. But I couldn't stop myself in my half-dazed state. I fumbled beside my bed until the draw slid open and I found the little box I'd been looking for. I flicked it open and inside I found the little silver blade I'd used countless times.

Relief was the first thing I felt as the cool metal bit into my skin. With another slash I felt the pain, but it wasn't bad, it was pain I could control. I sliced again. By now blood was flowing down my arm, but it was never enough. Another cut and I was starting to feel the pain ease.

I dug the blade deep, deeper than I'd done before and I could see my flesh slowly breaking apart and the blood well up. I quickly grabbed my sheet and pushed it against my arm to stop the blood. It took a while but eventually I quenched the flow and put the blade away again. Sitting back to examine my new scars that fit in so well with the others.

There were so many. Some, like the new ones, I was actually quite proud of. Deep ones that scabbed and took a long time to heal. But others were weak, pathetic shallow and bloodless. Scratches really.

Then last night came back to me. Every detail flooded into my mind having been forgotten until that moment. FUCK. I shouldn't have cut. SHIT. Percy had kissed me. Oh Gods, What was I going to do now? Just pretend it didn't happen. Because it did, and I'm not certain that I'm against it. What if I actually wanted to kiss him back? I couldn't be sure with my mind clouded. I needed to think before Percy came that night.