AN: I watched the episode last night and wow... so many freakin feels! I'm not sure why I wrote this though, possibly because I'm a martyr, or maybe because I feelt like I needed to write this down, to give it even more. Most of the dialouge is from the episode, and naturally I do not own supernatural, I sure wouldn't have this scene even exist if I had. Well, enoguh about that, enjoy the feels!

I'm sorry isn't good enough

"I'm sorry, for everything." Though the angels face was utterly blank from expression, the piercing blue eyes were filled with emotions. Still, the hunter pretended that he didn't notice anything.

"Yeah, well that's not going to cut it, not this time. So you can take your little apology and cram it up your ass." The older Winchester was done, finally done. He'd given him so many chances, only to have everything blow up in his face.

"Dean, I thought I was doing the right thing." His voice changed little, nearly impossible for anyone who didn't know him like the hunter did. He heard the pain, the honesty, the pleading, the need to salvage things between them. He needed to redeem himself. But not this time, he was out of chances to give. There are only so many times you can forgive someone, before you are done.

This was Cas, who saved him, bled for him, died for him… and betrayed him yet again and again. There just comes a time when you can't do it anymore, no matter how much you need them. They were family, but even now he couldn't bring himself to forgive him, because frankly, he couldn't handle facing another thing like this, not again.

"Yeah, you always do." But you never seem to do, were left unspoken between them. The angel wanted to say so many things, so badly, needing Dean to hear them. But he couldn't, he wouldn't. What's the point if he won't stay long enough to listen? He knew the older Winchester inside and out, way down into his beautiful soul, and he knew that look that Dean had given him. After everything that they had been through together, they had finally reached the end of the rope. This wasn't something that could be fixed.

"You can't save everyone." He'd been told once, he even said it himself. But not once had he thought that what he wouldn't be able to save was them. He had failed so many, and now he had finally failed the one friend who stood by him, trusted him, and taught him everything. Castiel knew that the Winchesters were still his friends, they cared about his health of course, but he also knew that Dean would never treat him the same again.

I'm sorry. I'm sorry I wasn't strong enough, good enough. I'm sorry I failed you time and time again. I'm sorry I didn't come to you when I needed help. I'm sorry I lied to you. I'm sorry I left. I'm sorry I came back. I'm sorry I can't stay away. I'm sorry I killed you over and over again. I'm sorry I almost managed to kill you for real. I'm sorry I didn't trust you enough. I'm sorry I let myself think I couldn't trust you, after everything you've done for me. I'm sorry I can't help your brother. I'm sorry that you have lost so much. I'm sorry for needing you. I'm sorry for not being what you want me to, for not being good enough for you. I'm sorry that I've hurt you. And I'm sorry for keep having the need to say I'm sorry.

There were much that he wanted to say, but couldn't bring himself to. They were nothing but words, and there wasn't any one around to hear them. So he didn't do anything, but silently watch as the brothers left him alone, leaving him behind.

"I'm sorry." He whispered into the silent room, receiving no answer.

Sometimes I'm sorry just isn't good enough.