"I had your job before you," I explained as we made our way through the woody path. Fortunately, these were the safe woods. I was sure Genkai would rig them if she felt like it would be beneficial—which, of course it would be. But it would also be cruel at this point in the day, after we had been promised an evening off.

Which makes it all that much more tempting for the old hag, to be sure.

"And another had your job before me."

"Well that doesn`t make any sense, assuming you`re a regular human and all." Ah yes, I recognized Yusuke`s observant voice. He had grown much more perceptive since he had begun working for the Reikai. I wouldn`t dare go as far to say mature.

"I am human," I replied, "As human as you are, at least."

"But the time… your age, it doesn`t add up. Unless you`re actually in your thirties. Wait, how old are you?"

"This body is fourteen years old," I answered honestly. It was strange saying it out loud. Koenma was the only other I had talked to that knew about this situation and even then it was never needed to say a thing about it.

"Yeah, but how old are you?" he asked, eyes wandering back to me from the forest path. I watched as he ran a hand through his un-gelled hair, trying to get it to stay back out of habit. It fell back into his face.

"Technically, I`ll be thirty-one next spring." It took me a moment to even remember. I felt much older than that already—thirty-one seemed so young,

"So am I allowed to ask how you ended up here?"

"I was getting to that, Yusuke." My tone turned in a pointed direction, growing irate at the whole situation. My temper wasn`t what it used to be after all of these years. The older you get, the crabbier.

"Sheesh, sorry."

"Being in this body was never my choice. I didn`t try to force myself into this body." I was defensive, afraid of the judgment that his mind was quietly bestowing upon me. "My partner kidnapped me and tortured me until I agreed to make a pact with him to open a massive breech in the barrier that would allow demons to get into Ningenkai."

There was a brief pause before he asked, "…Tortured. How?"

I slowed, feet dragging against the gravel path until I came to a complete stop. Yusuke slowed when he realized I wasn`t moving alongside him. My eyes never lifted from the ground, and I could have sworn that I saw it trembling, rippling t where I stood.

I could feel the memory rushing back to me. Hours of unspeakable things I was forced to watch. Chills ran throughout my body and disabled ever nerve in their wake. I felt my body shutting down before the images even reached me – I was on the ground with my hands out on the gravel. The earth around me spun and started to influence my head in that same manner.

I recalled a vivid dream I had with slides ending in spikes and fire, demons and humans being tortured. My eyes had been pried open to watch every second as I struggled against the chair I had been bound to. My stomach began to churn and the world around me ceased to exist and I felt the heat of the barn I had been trapped in for that period of time – the heat causing my stomach to churn.

I lost track of the gravel below me and felt my organs fighting for control over my body as I shivered uncontrollably. I broke into a cold sweat.

My stomach was the first to surrender to the memory, and I emptied the acid soaked rice and broth that I had been served hours earlier. It was only after I had collapsed on top of my own vomit that I could hear Yusuke`s voice coming back into perspective.

I kept heaving, my body convulsing on the ground as another distinct memory hit me like a speeding car. The mortified faces of victims as they were about to be pulled limb from limb—

"Elise!" Yusuke`s hands were gripped tightly around me and shaking me violently. I had been flipped over, my eyes staring up at the boy while tears steadily leaked from them.

I shrieked out in horror at the panic that had awakened in me after years of suppressing the monstrosity that was Chapter Black.

cradle robbers – xii
noises in the room – part two of two

Well, they're never gonna get me, like a bullet through a flock of doves...
To wage this war against your faith in me.

The hallway was dimly lit with bulbs lining the hall every few feet encased in brilliant glass ornaments. It stretched on through the first floor of the manor where it reached a pair of double doors. Screams echoed throughout the hall, followed by a chorus of laughter and cheering.

"Can`t you smell that?" Shinobu snarled as we headed for the doors, alongside Itsuki, who replied with, "Singed flesh and blood."

I slowed down my pace as another tortured scream rang out through the monument. Maybe we should have called for backup. The sound of the cheering crowd was intimidating to say the least. Shinobu left me in the dust, feet driven by the sound of torment. Itsuki looked back but stayed at his heels.

"Shinobu this isn`t a good idea, there`s too many of them!" I called after him, picking up the pace as I watched the two reach the doors,

"Shinobu wait!" I hissed—but to no avail.

The doors were ripped from their hinges by the brute strength that was Shinobu Sensui. The light from the room entered the hallway and I skidded to a halt before the threshold next to our demon ally. The room had quieted aside from the whimpers of the tortured victim which was buried behind the crowd of humans.

I looked up from the crowd to the high ceiling as Shinobu stepped into the deafly silent room and found a carcass hanging from the chandelier of the ballroom. A demon that had been skinned alive. I looked around the room to find several members of the Black Black Club wearing the skinned off faces of their victims. I made eye contact with human eyes hiding from behind the masks. Mostly male—few females among the crowd, but still a notable amount.

"Reikai`s goons!" Someone called out from the crowd, and I stepped forward to see a pool of blood where the limbs demons floated.

I met the eyes of tortured victims that were chained up, hanging, and stretched out on tables with spikes protruding from their bodies. Terrified prisoners waiting for their turn to be mutilated and forced to watch the fate that would soon befall them. I felt tears welling up in my eyes as I started to shake. The pit of my ever weak stomach churned and I had to look away from the pit of blood before me.

"Shinobu?" I turned back to see Itsuki`s pale and gentle hand reaching out to touch Shinobu`s shoulder. The boy was frozen in place as his eyes darted from each victim, to the chandelier, to the still grinning faces of the humans that were involved.

"Did you come to join the fun?" One of the blood soaked humans wearing one of the skinned off faces of a demon dared to pat his arm as the remainder of the humans in the room giggled to themselves in chorus. My eyes watched the rapid movement, a twitch of Shinobu`s hand had snapped the man`s wrist clean from the forearm. The room fell silent once again as the man shrieked out in pain.

I looked back to Shinobu now, who`s lips were moving. I watched the whole muted scene in slow motion.

"I`ll kill all of you."

He lunged, snapping the neck of another to his left and using the body of the victim as leverage to leap into the air and plant his foot into another masked face.

"Kill them!" Another, heavier man without a mask came at me with a spear.

I quickly dropped to a crouch and let the spike plunge into the torso of the man behind me as I summoned my reiki into each fist. I formed two sharp arrows to stab with in each fist due to such close proximity.

The room erupted into cries of pain and horror as Itsuki took to unsheathing his blade, with Shinobu being the loudest. I stole a glance over my shoulder to watch him massacre one after the other, screaming out with every blow inflicted on his victims.

"Ume!" Itsuki`s usual calm voice was frantic, and I turned back to see a woman charging me with a knife.

I sidestepped and gripped the wrist that had been holding onto the small blade and sent an arrow through her eyeball when I had only meant to graze her. She shrieked into my face, the skin mask peeling off as I pulled my reiki out of her eye socket.

I was stunned upon seeing a beautiful human face. It felt so wrong to kill a mortal – it was my first time doing so and hopefully my last. I knew they were in the wrong but we had never killed humans before and certainly Koenma wouldn`t be happy with us.

Still, how on Earth could he blame us? One after another, Shinobu claimed the lives of the Black Black Club. Those who I had tried to knock unconscious he would later pick up off the ground and slaughter anyway. He was blinded by rage until the last had fallen to the floor in a bloodied mess.

Once Itsuki had released the remaining prisoners and cut down the tortured bodies hanging from the chandelier and the walls, he returned to where the sulking teen stood. I checked the last human body for a pulse and found no survivors.

"We killed every human… Koenma is going to murder us all…" I uttered, scanning the room to see if anyone else was showing a sign of life – not that Shinobu would leave the place without making sure they were all dead.

"Sensui," Itsuki looked to the boy warily. Shinobu lifted his head. His hair was disheveled and his face and clothes stained with human blood.

"There was no man here. None."

…A team was sent from Reikai to investigate, and they interrogated Shinobu, Itsuki and I for hours afterward. I was cuffed and shoved to my knees outside of the manor we had traveled to while I tried to explain to them what happened through blurry eyes and quivering teeth. We were immediately taken into the depths of the Spirit World`s dungeons afterwards, escorted out at separate times to be interviewed again on what happened at the Feast.

We all cooperated, of course. It was the last time I had ever seen Shinobu before he had kidnapped me with the help of Itsuki. I remembered sitting up against the iron bars that kept us inside, across from Itsuki. Shinobu had kept to himself in the corner.

Koenma had come for me, grave features aging his usually youthful, cavalier demeanor. He was practically chewing through the mafuken he had been gripping between his teeth. I was still grimy, the blood of the other human`s staining my arms and legs, clothes and making my already ratty hair stick and clump awkwardly.

I fidgeted as I was escorted to the interrogation room, a few steps behind the prince himself. I tried to smooth the shoulder length, dark strands down. I could feel the dirt in my hair and it was enough to make me blush in embarrassment whenever he would look back at me with unease.

It wasn`t easy recounting what had happened during the mission we`d embarked on. I had no words to describe what Sensui had done; I kept making excuses for him as anyone who had been there would.

"Koenma you have to understand what it was like—" I had stammered the entire conversation, practically pleading with him, "They were torturing those creatures. It was like being present at the holocaust – only instead of bullets and gas chambers it was fire and slow torture while others awaited their own. They were terrified—we had to do something—"

"Shinobu is accepting responsibility for everything, Ume. You won`t have to worry about trying to justify your actions. We just want to hear what happened so we can make sure that—"

"Responsibility?!" I cut him off, my voice growing tense, "You sent us out on this knowing what we would discover—you still think that someone needs to take responsibility for doing the right thing?"

"All three of you understood and agreed to the terms that the humans involved would not be harmed." He narrowed his eyes at me from across the table, and I could sense his frustration.

He had brought Shinobu back to the cell before he`d taken me out. I could only assume Shinobu felt even more justified in his actions than I had. Still, it was the first time Koenma had ever been cross with me and it made chills run throughout my body. I had never been in trouble before in my life.

"I can`t protect any of you under the circumstances that you broke the rules. I have to punish someone according to the rules set by my father and the others in a higher position of authority. At least Shinobu has testified and admitted to the crime. Unless you have something to atone, too?"

I felt the frustrated sting of tears welling in my eyes, "How could you say that they were human?" I asked as I choked up, "Demons are not the only evil in this world."

"Unfortunately they aren`t, Kimura," He settled back in his chair across from me. "We can`t punish the humans for their crime because it was a psychological issue–"

"What?" I raised my voice at him, his previous words striking a nerve. "Psychological issue? You`re defending a cult for torturing innocent people on a psychological issue?!" I heard the pitch in my voice go up as my throat tightened around another gasp for air, "You`re telling me that Reikai will fail to see our approach as just because those men were sick?!"

"It wasn`t your approach that we`re looking at. Shinobu is taking responsibility—"

"Shinobu isn`t responsible!" I shrieked at the top of my lungs, fresh tears spilling over my cheeks, "How could you let this happen to us? You`re not even going to defend him!" I maintained the level of volume as I laid into Koenma in my vulnerable state,

"If anyone is responsible it`s you! You sent us out on this mission, you put us in a situation and we executed the only real monsters in the—"

"I never ordered you to execute human beings!" Koenma projected his voice now over mine, overpowering me and demanding my immediate attention,

" —you and Shinobu know full well what the rules are and you broke them because you couldn`t act responsible enough to ignore your personal feelings on the situation! You acted immaturely and Reikai is not going to just turn the other cheek because you decided now of all times to act like the children we did not hire for the job!"

I sat with wide eyes staring back at the angered man in front of me, tears still running down my face as I recollected the anguish experienced the day before. He was right; we had acted on our personal feelings. But it still didn`t feel right to me. I wasn`t sorry for killing the single human I had been relieved of blame for thanks to Shinobu.

"I ended up killing a woman in the chaos by accident… but I can`t say that I`m sorry, or that I even want Shinobu to take the blame for me on it. I feel no remorse for doing it." I admitted, breaking eye contact with Koenma to run the back of my hand and forearm over the tears. My voice was still spiteful, angry. I was too afraid to look back up, so I focused down at my dirty hands which were placed in my lap.

I heard him sigh dejectedly and decided that it was alright to look back up from the grime under my finger nails. I watched him lean over the desk, collapsing onto his elbows and running a clean hand through his immaculate hair to massage his scalp, tousling it a tad bit.

"It isn`t that I don`t understand why you`re backing Shinobu`s actions. But seeing as there is no way we can hide this or keep it under wraps from the committee I am going to have to place him under supervision and probation. I can fight that you weren`t an accessory to the crime and that you and Itsuki had no control over the situation. It won`t be easy to do but if I can get my father to listen to what I have to say he might be willing to spare the two of you…"

"But what will Shinobu`s punishment be? What will they do to him?" I asked then, genuinely concerned. Shinobu was cold but he had always been civil towards me. He had saved my life on several occasions before and he`d bothered to train me and teach me how to defend myself. I knew that he was a genuinely good person with honest intentions and it hurt my heart to think that he would be punished so severely for an… emotional reaction.

"That hasn`t been decided yet." Was his answer. We stared at each other from over the desk in his office, silent for all but the sniffle I gave here and there to make sure the snot wasn`t pouring down my face.

I paused to sniffle again, watching his now stoic face as he blinked back at me, "I never once pitied them when I was watching him stomp their organs. Not after I`d seen what they`d done."

He stayed put as I stared back at him through convicted eyes, his lips pressed tightly together as his brows knit, a bead of sweat forming on the side of his temple. I waited for him to condemn me as well.

He leaned forward hesitantly, his lower lip dropping open without any words. Silence left me suspended in the moment as I hung onto words that weren`t being voiced.

He set back against his chair, his eyes now calculating. I watched his pupils twitch left to right as he focused between my own bloodshot eyes. I watched the muscles in his throat tighten under his skin as he inhaled, releasing a large sigh through his nostrils.

"I resent the way that this is being handled, Ume, however I cannot change the laws because Shinobu suddenly decided he couldn`t control himself. If he can`t handle his emotions in that sort of situation, then we can`t have him working for us."

"Shinobu never forfeit his emotions to the situation! He did what was just. They deserved to die!" I shouted at him, another wave of hysterical tears burst from within me from nowhere, no build up,

"Is this how you personally think Reikai should be handling the situation?"

"—Of course I don`t!" I watched him flinch, shifting uncomfortably in his seat, "Of course not, Ume, but I can`t go against my father`s set of rules."

"You`re such a wuss, Koenma." I laughed bitterly, wiping at tears, "You couldn`t stand up to your own father. Like he`d really punish you. How sad."

"It isn`t as easy as you would think." His voice was quiet, and he looked uncomfortable as he refused to make eye contact with me from behind his desk. I slowly turned my head from side to side, refusing to listen to anymore. "There`s an escort waiting for you outside the door, Ume." He turned his chair to the side. I listened to the creak as he leaned forward, his elbows to his knees and his face cradled in his hands, sighing heavily once more.

"You can go."

I straightened, bare feet meeting the tile floor. I had discarded my blood soaked shoes at the scene of the crime, trying to strip anything soiled heavily in human blood off of me as quickly as possible.

I stopped by the cell that was holding Shinobu alone when I had returned, clean and fresh and with a couple hours of sleep on me. Itsuki had been released already. He stepped forward from the shadows in the corner and up to the iron bars, wrapping his hands around the iron and leaning up against them. I had never seen him looked so pale.

"Itsuki informed me of something after you left." He stared past me, through the wall behind me. I looked up at his eyes to find them blinded with some sort of quiet, driven determination.

"What is it?" I asked, stepping closer, afraid of missing a single word.

With the same distracted gaze he continued, "Reikai has possession of a tape that holds all records of Humanity`s darkest crimes. It`s said to traumatize anyone who watches it. It`s considered torture to force someone to watch it…"

"You don`t want to watch that, Shinobu," I cut him off, "Whatever that is, it`s locked up for a reason—"

"He said they keep it in the archives. It isn`t even locked up. We could easily get a hold of something like that."

"We aren`t doing anything, Shinobu. You`ve got to clear your name and prove to the Spirit World that you don`t deserve to be punished…" I paused, watching as the corners of his mouth turned upwards, "Are you listening, Shinobu?"

"Not you, Kimura," He broke his gaze with the wall to finally notice that I was standing inches in front of him. I watched as his eyes turned foggy as he stared past me once more,

"I need to see if for myself. I need to see what kind of monsters we have been fighting to protect, Kimura."

"Shinobu I know what we saw was traumatic… but not all of the humans deserve to let that cult speak for them. They were mentally disturbed after all…"

"Koenma`s brainwashed you, I see." He was speaking directly to me again, looking down at me in what was a familiar looking sneer.

"It isn`t like that. Shinobu I thought that it was as wrong as you did. I defended you to Koenma, but I don`t believe that the human race is that cruel—"

"If one human is capable, they all are. The Black Black club will spread like wildfire among the vermin. Are you going to help us retrieve the tape from the Archives? We can watch it together."

"No, no." I gaped up at him as he looked back down at me in perfect seriousness, "They keep it for a reason, if it`s that horrible we shouldn`t see it. No one should see it." I felt panic welling up inside of me. I knew that if Shinobu wanted to break into the archives for a cassette then it would be easy as pie for him – with or without assistance.

"Are you afraid?" He asked, the sneer disappearing from his face into what now resembled curiosity. His face regaining its youthful innocence, he spoke with the softness of a mother comforting her frightened child,

"I`ll watch it with you, Ume."

I shook my head from side to side with great force, terrified that he would even be considering stealing from the archives after all of the trouble he was already been forced into.

"You should just worry about yourself for right now. Just wait until they release you. You don`t have to defend the human race anymore if you feel that strongly about it. Please don`t get yourself into more trouble, Shinobu."

"…Are you worried about me?" He interrupted, and I was nodding before he had finished pronouncing the words,

"Yes! Yes of course I`m worried—"

"—Or are you worried about Koenma?" He went on, "He won`t be able to do anything to us. Just come with Itsuki and I."

"Itsuki is in on this as well." I repeated back to him, staring with my mouth wide enough to catch flies.

"I`ll keep you safe, Ume." He reached out and stroked my hair, tucking it behind my ear as he looked at me with what I could only assume to be some false sort of adoration. Shinobu had never looked at me with that sort of acknowledgement in the past and had no reason to now.

Which hurt me somewhere inside, as I had always quietly longed for acknowledgement from my partner and was now finally receiving it as incentive to go along with him.

"I can`t help you steal from Reikai. Please reconsider." I pleaded, breaking eye contact and staring at the stone floor, trying to shut down and make myself cold, emotionless so that I wouldn`t be swayed by Shinobu`s manipulating.

"If you aren`t going to ally with Itsuki and I, then we don`t need you. We`ll exterminate you along with the other vermin."

"You can`t be serious." I spat, irritated now that he would dare threaten me, "Get a hold of yourself for fucks sake! You`re never going to get out from under Koenma`s thumb talking like that. They`ll lock you up forever."

"But you have a way around Koenma don`t you?" He spat back, causing me to step backwards, confusion clouding my mind,

"…What—"

"—You know perfectly well that he`s found of you. Why else would he have forced me to work with you? You aren`t much of a fighter and you have a weak stomach. Koenma keeps you around for his own amusement. He likes you, I suppose." I watched amusement flicker behind his black eyes, and the smile on his face never really disappeared. The entire situation was entertaining him and it was starting to provoke me. "It`d be a shame if he lost sight of you."

"Whatever, Shinobu." I hissed, "There is no reason for this behavior. Have fun getting caught trying to steal your Black Black tape."

I turned, heading for the winding stairwell just past several bolted doors. We did not share the dungeon alone with a single cell. Reikai used the dungeon to hold certain volatile creatures. There were rumors of experimentation as well. Only King Enma held the master key for the remaining, secluded rooms.

"So that`s your final decision. You will continue to ignore the reality of the human race."

I stopped on the landing before the first step, my back to him. My jaw was taut and I wanted to scream at him, but I remained silent for a moment, gathering my thoughts. Sensui was not himself anymore, and he was now trying to get under my skin. Which was very Sensui of him in the first place, only in a much darker sense. Shinobu had always seen humans and demons as black and white and fought against the greater of the two evils relentlessly.

But now that the roles were reversed, he failed to comprehend that grey areas existed. I lifted my chin over my shoulder to look back at the now jaded man in the cell, trying to mask my distress.

"No Shinobu. I will continue to defend the innocent."

"I didn`t see him for months afterwards. I had explained to Koenma that he and our other partner may have been planning on stealing Chapter Black. He seemed pensive at the time I had told him and raised security in the archive wing. After that I didn`t hear a thing about it." I explained to an exhausted delinquent over tea.

Genkai had retired to bed early after expressing to us that she had not been feeling well after having to hear about Yusuke dragging me home from miles within her property. She had mumbled to herself about how she was getting too old to deal with teenage wind bags.

In reality we could hear the hum of a television monitor coming from the next room, along with the clacking of a gaming console controller.

"He never returned to class. The authorities interviewed several of our classmates, however I was never a suspect because of the distance we kept from each other in public and at school. I forgot about him for a while, kept to myself. Every once in a while Koenma would contact me to keep in touch with what I had been observing around me in the human world. Sometimes he would have me run errands for him, work on some simple cases with lower level demons around my area. Eventually his name was mentioned fewer times and I was excited that I had made the upper level track team so I was distracted with that… I was completely oblivious to him the night he had followed me home from a meet."

I paused to sip from the teacup, the bitterness of the tea forcing my taste buds to stand on end briefly before being soothed by the warmth of the only stared back at me, his tea untouched and a the towel he had used to dry his hair from his shower that was still damp and draped over his shoulders, not bothering to put it up and change his clothes.

"There was no way that Koenma could have informed me that the tape had been stolen by the time the two had reached me. He`d caught me off guard when I had run to the bathroom at the train station. I knew it was a dumb idea to run down to the restrooms in the dark when there were few people around, but I had to go to the bathroom after drinking at least a liter of water at the meet. I was catching the last train late from three towns over and only a couple of people were on the commute with me. It was the perfect opportunity I suppose. I exited the restroom and made my way for the steps to the terminal and blacked out immediately. I`d awakened to the boy securing me to a chair in what appeared to be some sort of shed. It was early in September and it was so hot. I was drenched in sweat before he`d forced me to sit through intervals of Chapter Black."

"So you`ve seen the tape?" He blurted in disbelief, leaning over the small table between us that held the tea kettle. I watched as the liquid in Yusuke`s cup rippled violently as he shook the table with his sudden movement.

"I passed out a minutes in. I have a weak stomach and couldn`t endure much more of it. There were points where he would wake me up and stand beside me with his hands gripping my face so that I wouldn`t look away, but it was only a matter of time before I had to look away so that I could vomit bile or pass out all over again. I didn`t have much sense of time. I`m not certain if I would have survived had I watched the entire thing without obstruction… I`m sure I couldn`t have. I haven`t any clue how many have achieved this aside from my ex partners themselves—neither of which were ordinary humans. I think an average human would suffer from some sort of trauma indefinitely after the few pieces that I have seen. I`ve managed to block the images from my mind. Sometimes I have nightmares replicating certain scenes that really disturbed me. I have a reoccurring one about carnival rides resulting in fire and gore and I see faces that were on the tape. I try my best to suppress any and all thoughts of the tape as best as I can and try to avoid things that could trigger me. It`s been harder since I got back in touch with Koenma. To be honest the nightmare about the carnival has frequented my mind since the day I saw you hovering out side of our classroom window."

I sighed and set my cup down to refill it with the kettle. I watched a cloud of steam rise up from the open tap as I tilted it just enough to let a flow of steady liquid run from the spout and into my cup.

"…You never explained how you became Elise." I looked from the now filled cup and at his quizzical brow. His face cradled in one hand, elbow rested on his knee.

"I`m getting there, Yusuke," Rubbing my temples, I groaned at the oncoming migraine, blinking underneath my hand a couple of times to clear my thoughts before continuing,

"When he realized that I wasn`t going to let Chapter Black and the Feast change my loyalty to Koenma and my human life he left me alone. I suppose that he thought that I would come around. They left me and I was found a little later by Reikai Officials that Koenma had sent out to look find me. I suppose they didn`t think that I would go immediately to Koenma and explain to him what had happened so soon—as they hunted me down and attacked me in a vulnerable state. I was exhausted and was caught off guard. He was strong enough to finish me with one blow of his Reikai."

"He killed you with one attack?" Yusuke asked.

"Not only was his Reikai that potent, but the force snapped my neck on impact as well." I explained, "Koenma was able to capture my soul and quickly transfer it to Elise`s mother when she was in labor. The baby wasn`t supposed to have made it, Koenma said the original soul had already vacated it`s body when I was placed inside of it. Until the day I saw you outside of the building with Botan I had lived a somewhat normal life with Jillian and my new family."

"And now you`ve put yourself right back where you started." He blinked, "Why the hell would you want to put up with this shit show?"

"There are a lot of reasons." I ran a hand through my freshly washed strands of hair, still damp from the bath, "I want to become strong—stronger than I was in my previous life. I`ve already dealt with the Black Black club once before, and I think I can handle myself in the ring with the training Genkai has been giving us… I should be able to hold my own. It would bother me more if I didn`t go and pretend as if it wasn`t happening."

"But before you even heard of this you wanted to return to the Reikai and beg Koenma to try and help me with the grunt work… even before the tournament was mentioned. There`s more to it then just what you`ve told."

I pursed my lips together before puckering them out to release a sigh.

"I`ve had a bad feeling for the past couple of years. It may not be anything at all, but," I looked across the table with vulnerability at the intense, chocolate eyes that stared back. I had never admitted this aloud to anyone,

"Sometimes I feel like I`m not the only soul in this body. I hate to say it but I don`t think the soul that originally belonged to this shell was ready to part with it. I feel almost haunted in a sense, like there is another presence influencing my emotions. I hate the way this sounds but I could never care for Jillian like a real sister… I see her from the standpoint of a mother figure almost. Sometimes when she says certain things or does certain things I find myself becoming one end of an emotional spectrum. It`s harder to think like the adult I am on the inside when dealing with her. Heaven knows I try and maintain my cool when dealing with her but I can feel sibling rivalry, aggravation, sadness… empathy. Things I have never experienced in the same way that I would have thought."

"You think that Koenma lied to you about your new body." He shorted the statement for clarification and I nodded hesitantly in return.
"I hate to say it. I still feel that I owe him for saving my soul and everything but then there`s the other thing, …and I hate to say that I don`t trust Koenma because I do. I`d trust him with my life and he`s proven that I can trust him with that once already… I just don`t like that I could have taken a life from someone else. Of course he wouldn`t tell me the truth if it was a last second decision. What if he had acted on an emotional impulse and disregarded whether there was a healthy soul to body relationship and just synced me in regardless? It makes my stomach church and I stay up at night sometimes feeling so conflicted and thinking that I should approach him. I want to find out for myself before I approach him with something like that. And now I have an easier access to the archives if I`m running to the Reikai every so often."

The tender thought process I was turning over in my head was cut off by cackling. It was slow to start and quiet, building in volume. Soon Yusuke was reeling backwards, howling as he almost lost his balance from leaning so far back. He wiped at tears of laughter welling in the corner of his eyes before instinctively smacking at his knees,

"You`re playing Koenma! That`s hilarious! And this whole time I thought maybe you just had some lame hero complex!" The next words came out in a high pitched squeal, "Man, what a relieeeeef!" And with that his cackled turned into gleeful giggles.

"I`m not playing Koenma, jackass!" I defended angrily, irritated that he would so quickly jump to that conclusion, "I am every bit as loyal to Koenma as I was before—"

"Sure," He reeled back again, more cackling erupting from his throat, "Hey!" He paused, leaned over the table quietly with mischief gleaming in his eyes, "Does that make you like a Cougar or something? That makes you a total Cougar. You`re a hag on the inside but not on the outside! I bet you and Genkai have a lot in common!"

"Yusuke, I swear on both of my lives," I groaned, "I am two seconds from beating the snot out of you,"

"Elise is a Cougar!" He squealed, rolling around on the freshly polished, wood flooring. Without a second thought, I let my irritation best me and placed my hands under the table between us, lifting with the remaining energy I had left from the rough day I`d had. I flipped the table over onto the boy and hot tea splashed out of the even hotter copper kettle that had fallen into his lap.

"You never told me his name."

I was jerked from the slumber I was just about to slip into. I couldn`t decide if I had heard Yusuke`s voice or if it was just my mind playing tricks on me.

"Hmm?" I hummed, curling into one of the thick blankets that Genkai had provided for us.

"His name. The creep that killed you."

I blinked my eyes open in the dark to find Yusuke staring at me. I could make out the whites of his eyes, his pupils large. He watched me sympathetically, as if I was mourning the loss of my previous life still.

Something I had also always suppressed. There was no time to be caught being sad about something I would have to make an excuse for later. Between my family and friends there was no room sit down and talk about these things. Or cry.

"Sometimes," I cleared my throat, " Sometimes I like to think he doesn`t have a name. I feel like if I say it out loud then he`ll become real a threat in my life again. I`ll acknowledge him."

"You think he`ll come after you again?" He asked, his tone hardening from the whisper it previously was. It was almost as if the boy was perturbed from hearing of it.

"It`s been fourteen years and he still hasn`t found me. I think it`s safe to say this is a pretty solid cover."

"Yeah, but what if he recognizes you at the tournament? Your use of your reiki?"

"I—" I started to answer but was cut off again. I sunk farther into my pillow as the boy carried on, getting comfortable again as his words dancing around my ears.

"Did it even occur to you how dangerous it would be for you should he discover your new identity? Huh?" Amidst his words, Yusuke propped himself onto his elbows to make himself seem more intimidating as he worked himself up. I yawned out of sleepiness, more than ready to forget the whole thing already.

"Hey are you awake over there?!" He raised his voice louder, reaching over to my side of the futon to violently jerk my shoulder around in his grasp. I pulled myself away and groaned, propping myself up on an elbow as well,

"Sheesh, Urameshi. I`m so tired, stop," I whimpered before gripping my pillow and whacking him over the head with it. We only retained few precious hours of sleep and he was interfering.

"You`re telling me you don`t even have a plan for when this creep figures out who you are?!" He shouted at me, and I released a frustrated sigh,

"I don`t like to think that he`ll catch me, but if he does then I`ll fight, okay?" I snapped at him, and his loud mouth snapped shut for a moment,
"If he finds me, then fine. Great."

"You just told me that you`re afraid of him."

"So I`ll fight him and piss my pants. Oh well." I let my head fall back on the pillow, "Being afraid never stopped me before."

I was terrified of Shinobu to be honest, I knew there was no chance of survival in a match against him. Maybe he would be at the tournament, there was a chance… after all it was a popular even among the Black Black Club.

Of course he would know better than to steer clear of anything that would be monitored closely by the Reikai. It was still up in the air whether Sensui was ballsy enough to show his face. If he was… well I`d rather have a confrontation in a public arena than an alleyway back home, alone. At least with the tournament I would have allies at my side. I heard a rustling of blankets and felt the shift in the futon as Yusuke rolled onto his side, facing away from me.

"Hey," His voice was softer now, but still spiked annoyance in me. I was trying to sleep, Yusuke.

"What?!" I spat, glaring daggers into the back of his messy, un gelled mop of hair.

He was quiet for a moment, and I watched him silently as I saw his ribcage expand with every breath he drew in, collapsing when he exhaled. Perhaps he`d fallen asleep in the middle of a thought.

I closed my eyes, attempting to surrender to peace once again, just as I heard him draw a quick, unexpected breath.

"If you do get too scared… I`ll take care of him for you."

I felt a warmth spread throughout my body as he said these words, and butterflies found their way from my stomach and into my smile. I opened my right eye to look over at him once more. He remained on his side, facing the wall.

I closed both eyes for the final time that evening and fell into the dreaming state.