EPILOGUE

She couldn't give up now, she couldn't. But it hurt, it hurt, it hurt… She was so terribly tired… A soft hand caressed her hair and wiped the sweat off her forehead, but her eyes were unfocussed and she couldn't tell who or what it was. The pain wasn't the worst she had ever experienced, but she had never been more scared. It was new pain, different from all torture she knew. Another scream escaped her lips and she gasped for breath. She had no energy left. She couldn't do this. Her whole body ached and she wanted nothing more than to let go and sleep…

"Stay with me, Bella. Don't give up now, it's almost over."

A familiar, soothing voice. She couldn't place it, but it was good. For a moment she felt calm, then the pain returned full force, like a wave crashing over her, pushing the air from her lungs with its strength. She opened her mouth but couldn't even scream anymore. Her already blurred vision started to darken again.

"Breathe, Bella. You're doing fine, just breathe."

The voice calmed her again, and once more she gasped for breath, only to be overwhelmed by pain again. She could practically feel herself rip open, blood leaking on the floor and soaking her dress, but it didn't matter. It was almost over now. Tiredness overcame her, and she closed her eyes. Vaguely she heard a small cry, one that drew a smile from her lips. With that smile still on her lips, her tired mind surrendered to darkness…

(Pagebreak)

"Neville! I'm so glad you could make it!"

Andromeda embraced him, and the man happily answered her hug. Neville Longbottom had survived the war, but only barely. He was within an inch of death when they had carted him off to St Mungo's, where he had stayed for months, floating between life and death. When he finally woke from his coma, he had been faced with the true cost of it all. His friends were dead, his grandmother was dead, he had no surviving family that could care for him… Andromeda had always diligently visited him, and he was certain that if not for her he wouldn't have made it. She had been his only incentive to hold on. Even now his extensive injuries were no more than scars, loneliness and hurtful memories were never faraway… He broke the embrace and smiled at the elderly woman.

"Well, how are the little ones?"

Andromeda smiled brightly and led him inside. On the carpet, two small children were playing. The oldest one, a happy looking six-year-old with bright blue hair, jumped up and threw himself at Neville.

"Uncle Neville!"

He ruffled the boy's blue tresses.

"Good to see you, Teddybear!"

The child frowned.

"I'm not a baby anymore, don't call me that!"

Neville nodded.

"Of course. How is your brother?"

Teddy grinned.

"He ate the soap in the bathroom yesterday."

Andromeda's youngest charge, Scorpius, was a tiny blonde two-year-old with a liking of all things he could put in his mouth and possibly swallow. So far he had managed to eat a couple crayons, a knut, three buttons of his coat, a yarn thread –although Andromeda had managed to pull that one out again- the head of a wizarding chess piece, and now apparently a piece of soap. Neville chuckled, knowing that the youngest Black had already made more than one trip to the St Mungo's children's ward for his feeding habits. He turned to the small child and picked it up, apparently disturbing it in the progress of sucking on a magical pen. The kid protested heavily when Neville took the deep purple glitter pen from him.

"Unca Neville!"

"Does your mother know you're eating her pens?"

Scorpius guiltily shook his head, and then tried to grab the thing from Neville's hand anyway. Neville laughed and put it out of reach on the table, making the small child in his lap frown and prepare for a crying fit.

"Teddy, why don't you ask your gran if she brings a platter of cookies here? I think your little brother wants something to chew on."

The prospect of cookies seemed to calm the little one down. As Teddy ran to the kitchen to ask for the dessert, Neville observed Scorpius. He had light blonde hair and coal black eyes, quite an unusual combination. Andromeda had said that he was a war orphan, sort of. His father had been killed in the war and his mother had died during childbirth, and there were no living relatives left to take care of the baby. Apparently Andromeda had been a close friend of his mother before the war, and so he had arrived in her care. She had called him Scorpius Black, using her maiden name and honouring her family's tradition of naming children after constellations. Neville found that the child reminded him of someone, but he couldn't really place whom. Scorpius really looked like Andromeda as well, so much that Neville sometimes wondered if she had perhaps blood-adopted him. Either way, he liked the child, so much even that he hadn't hesitated when Andy had asked him to be his godfather. He looked up from his musings when he heard Andy's playful voice.

"I see you've kept Scor from eating more of my writing equipment…"

She had entered the living room again, holding a plate full of chocolate cookies. Neville nodded and gave a cookie to the blonde child in his lap. Teddy had clearly had his share of cookies in the kitchen, judging from the chocolate stains around his mouth. Andromeda set the platter down, took a chair, and they started their conversation, discussing life at Hogwarts, the new students, Neville's latest Herbology project… Neville was happy to be there. Andromeda's house always felt much more like home than his quarters at Hogwarts…

(Pagebreak)

Eventually Andy excused herself to go change Scorpius' nappy, leaving Neville alone with Teddy. He watched the child, who sat on the carpet with a small pile of pictures and changed his hair and facial features to somewhat match the people who were depicted. He held a specific one, and then suddenly changed his hair to long golden blonde hair. Neville heard him talk to himself.

"Like gran's dead sister…"

He smiled, seeing that Teddy obviously was holding a picture of Narcissa. She had been married to a death eater, but according to Andromeda she had never truly engaged in Voldemort's plans. She had been a victim as well. He was just thinking that when the golden blonde hairdo made place for one in another shade of blonde, lighter and without waves, reaching just over Teddy's shoulder. A shock went through him.

"And like Mr Lucius…" Neville wondered why Teddy would have a picture of Lucius Malfoy… and why the child would know the man's name when he didn't know Narcissa's… Fascinated and slightly worried, he watched the child's play. He was still watching the same picture when his blonde Lucius-hairdo made place for a tangled mess of black curls. Neville couldn't believe his ears when he caught Teddy saying,

"And Missus Bella…"

Something was amiss here. Neville couldn't help it; he still felt his mouth become dry when he thought about Bellatrix Lestrange. To see Teddy, little Teddy, change his hair to match hers and call her "Bella"… He got up from his chair and went to sit with Teddy, who didn't even notice him, engrossed in his game as he was.

"Can I see those pictures, Teddy?"

The child looked up, and immediately he morphed back to his own features, hiding the photos. He looked startled and a little panicked.

"Please don't tell granny I went in her desk again!"

Neville shook his head. So Teddy wasn't supposed to have those photos… That would explain some things, but not everything.

"I won't tell. Can I see them?"

Reluctantly, Teddy gave the pictures. There were a couple of his parents, some old school friends of Andromeda, Andy together with a healer colleague he didn't know, a picture of her with her two sisters back in Hogwarts, a beautiful portrait photo of Narcissa that had been used in her obituary, and at last a relatively recent picture that made him gasp for breath. It was a picture taken outside a wooden cabin surrounded by trees. Two people stood on it. One was a woman, not young by far but still beautiful in a way, with tangled black curls framing her face and a wide, slightly insane grin decorating it. The other was a tall man with long blonde hair, deep-lying worried eyes and a soft, pensive smile. The woman held her arms around a swollen belly, and the man looked with unhidden admiration at her, before she turned and elbowed him in the side, which made him laugh.

Neville didn't know what shocked him more, that it was a recent picture of two of his archenemies, that it displayed such human emotions, or that Bellatrix was obviously pregnant. While he stared at the picture, puzzle pieces started to fall in place in his head. That blonde hair, so much like that of his dear godson… The obvious pregnancy… Andy's dodgy story to explain Scorpius' adoption… He just didn't know what to say or think anymore.

"Uncle Neville? Uncle Neville, are you okay?"

He looked at Teddy and didn't know what to say.

"D-Do… Do you know these people?"

Teddy seemed uneasy now.

"You shouldn't see that photo… it's a secret…"

More mysteries. More lies. Neville bit his teeth and shook his head.

"You know me, I would never tell anyone."

"Oh… Okay. It's Mr Lucius and Missus Bella. They came here only once. I don't remember well because I was still very small, but it was special because I had to hide in the kitchen when they came. Mr Lucius was nice. A bit weird though. I didn't see Missus Bella but I think she was here too because I heard granny yelling at a woman. That's all I remember."

"And… this photo?"

Teddy blushed.

"I found it when I went to take the pictures to play with. Granny said they were Mr Lucius and Missus Bella, and that they were a secret so I couldn't take the picture again…" He hesitated. "But I like Mr Lucius' hair so much and it's hard to do without a picture."

Neville was baffled. Completely baffled.

"Thank you for telling me this. Can I borrow this picture?"

Teddy shook his head.

"It's secret. I have to put it back in the drawer."

"Okay, then go do that. I… I need to use the bathroom."

Neville didn't go to the bathroom; he immediately went to see Andromeda. She was playing with Scorpius in her room and didn't notice him entering.

"Andy, we have to talk."

"Huh?"

"About Scorpius. And about a certain pair of death eaters you apparently housed."

Andromeda paled.

"Oh Merlin…"

"So? Are you going to tell me?"

Andy set Scorpius on the carpet and closed the door.

"How did you find out?"

"I saw a rather compromising picture."

"Teddy…"

"Don't blame him, he was simply playing. What I want to know is the real story here. How much longer did you think to keep this from me?"

"As long as necessary."

"What? Andy!"

Andromeda looked at him and shook her head at his indignation.

"They came here one day, about four years ago. Emergency Apparition. Bellatrix was dying from a curse and Lucius had lost his memory. I didn't believe it was them, at first." She chuckled darkly. "I almost died of a heart attack when I heard Lucius use the word 'please'."

"And you let them in. The murderer of your daughter?"

Neville's voice was stone cold.

"I let them in. As I said, I didn't think it was really them at first, I thought it was some kind of nasty prank. But it was them."

"You should have called the aurors."

Andromeda softly shook her head.

"Maybe. But I couldn't. I had already buried my daughter, my son-in-law, my husband, my sister and my cousin, Neville. Lucius was hardly in a state to be judged; he didn't even remember what he had done, and Bella… She was my sister, Neville, and despite all what she did I never stopped thinking of her as such. Had they been apprehended I would not have interfered, I know that much. But… I couldn't kill them. I couldn't sentence my last sister to death." She shrugged. "Maybe it's weakness. I like to think it's my morality."

"Morality? You think letting a woman go free who tortured people into insanity, who killed your own daughter, you think that is morality?"

Neville was raging angry now, but he managed to keep his volume limited for the sake of the baby crawling at their feet. Andromeda had tears in her eyes now.

"It had been a year already. I couldn't muster enough hate for it. I had to let it go, just try to understand it!"

"You said she was ill, dying. You could have let her die."

"She was my sister, Neville!"

"That never mattered a thing to her!"

"I have had enough hate to last a lifetime, Neville. I was and still am sick of it. I don't forgive any of them, but if I have to put active energy in hating them it'll be my ending, not theirs!"

"I'll tell you what lasts a lifetime, Andy. My parents, she sentenced them for life! She deserves to rot!"

"Neville!"

They had completely forgotten about their volume now, and baby Scorpius was crying. They stopped their argument for a moment and Andy picked up the child, soothing him. Neville scowled.

"And that child."

"About two years ago, they appeared on my doorstep again. Bellatrix was in labour and Lucius was panicking. I helped them. It was a terrible delivery, it took hours and hours and Bella almost bled out completely. I managed to save both her and the baby though. She named him Scorpius, and told me to take him. She said she wanted her child to grow up with… 'unbroken' people, I think she called it. They left soon, but gave me that picture you saw. They wanted me to tell Scorpius as soon as he would be old enough to understand."

Neville shook his head. He was the godfather of Bellatrix Lestrange's child. Or maybe it was Bellatrix Malfoy now, he didn't know. He tried his best, but he couldn't hate the little one. He had adored that kid from the moment Andromeda had shown it to him. To think that something so sweet and unspoiled had come from the two most horrible people he knew… He could hardly believe it.

"Do you hate your godson now, Neville?"

"He can't help being born from that bitch. I could never hate him, you know that."

"Please understand why I did what I did. They… they changed. And trust me, Neville… they both are sentenced for life as well."

Neville raised eyebrows.

"It's not my story to tell."

"Since I can hardly ask them, you'll have to tell me."

Andromeda sighed.

"The torture Lucius underwent has damaged his mind irreparably. The memory loss was just the tip of the iceberg. When his memory returned… you'll probably won't believe me, but I have seen it, I have seen his memories and I think it was worse than what Bella did to your parents."

"How can anything be worse?"

Andy swallowed.

"Not only to be tortured yourself, but to see your child tortured into insanity before your eyes, and be obliged to kill him later on? To be put under the Imperius and forced to mutilate your wife practically beyond recognition? I could show you the memories, Neville, but just so you know… they made me throw up, twice."

He didn't know what to say. The repercussions of what Andy said were huge, and he was only just beginning to grasp it.

"And… and what about Bellatrix?"

Andromeda sighed.

"It's more delicate. She's been at the wrong end of a cruciatus more often than you might think. You know better than anyone else what traces that leaves in a person's mind."

"She chose to support Voldemort, she had it coming."

"Does a daughter have it coming when a father pulls his wand on her, Neville? Our father always held her to another standard than Cissy and I. There were times he punished her daily."

"Oh…"

"And Azkaban didn't do her good either. Fourteen years of dementors, can you even imagine that? Perhaps she deserved her jailing, but still…"

Neville slowly shook his head. He couldn't imagine that. Perhaps it was true; perhaps they indeed were damaged and punished enough. He didn't think he could let go of his hate as easily as Andy had, though. He had hated Bellatrix Lestrange for far too long, and he had lost too much because of her and her stupid cause.

"Please, Neville. Let it go. Keep it secret. They don't bother anyone anymore, and if not for me, do it for your godson. Do you want him to hear later on that his godfather had his parents executed?"

Neville was stuck. He shook his head again and coldly said.

"I'll keep it a secret. But don't… I don't know what to think of you anymore."

Andromeda looked at her shoes.

"I'm sorry. I… I wanted to tell you, I just didn't think you'd understand."

"You're right, I don't understand. But I'll keep it a secret. For Scorpius."

"Thank you…"

"Don't thank me. Thank your Slytherin ways that got me in this position."

Coming from Neville, that was a grave insult. She watched how he walked out of her house with big strides and apparated away, with a heavy feeling in her heart. Things one does for family… she prayed he would come around, eventually.

(Pagebreak)

Neville had spent a lot of thought on what he had learned in the weeks after his falling out with Andromeda, eventually deciding to go see the offending situation for himself. He was angry still, but if anything of what Andy had told him was true… Usually he had a terrible memory, but the photo Teddy had shown him was almost burned on his retina. He pictured the location quite clearly, an old forest cabin surrounded by birch trees, and holding the image in his mind he disapparated. It was dangerous, apparating on image, one of the most irresponsible things you could do besides drunk apparition, yet Neville felt he had to try it. It seemed to take forever, before he appeared in a forest. No missing body parts apart from maybe a lock of hair, and the surrounding had lots of birch trees, so far so good… He looked for the cabin, but didn't see it anywhere… until he felt an unusual stir, an indication of wards. Following the strange tingling magic and using what knowledge of wards he had, he reached the clearing that he had seen on the photo. Hiding in the bushes, he observed what was going on.

Both Death Eaters were sitting outside on a bench in front of the cabin, and it was quite a shocking thing to watch. Bellatrix had her arms wrapped around Lucius, and appeared to be slowly rocking him while his head rested against her shoulder. The wind carried their voices to Neville.

"Sssh… It's okay… It's gone now…"

"I d-don't want to r-remember anymore, Bella…"

"I know, but we can't stop it, you know that."

"Obliviate me? Please… I… I know you can."

"We talked about this. I can't do that. It would erase all that you are, it would erase me from your mind." Neville heard a soft chuckle. "And you don't want to forget me, now do you?"

"No… I… I don't…"

Neville watched open-mouthed how Bellatrix pressed a kiss on Lucius' forehead.

"Sleep. You'll feel better when you wake."

He saw how Bellatrix calmly patted Lucius' hair while the man slept in her embrace, and the wind brought pieces of a hummed song to his ears. Neville suddenly felt as if he was intruding on something very private… which, in truth, he was. There was something so tender and caring about her gestures that it made him feel ashamed for watching. As quietly as he could he moved out of the wards, trying his best not to disturb them, and apparated away. He never tried to find the cabin again, instead he went to Andromeda's as soon as he could and tried to mend their friendship. He lavished his godson with love and attention, trying his best not to look for pieces of Bellatrix and Lucius in him. That was behind him. It was with a bitter aftertaste that he buried the battle axe, but… if a monster like Bellatrix was capable of tenderness… then why shouldn't he be capable of forgiving?

(Author's Notes)

A long epilogue! Now this story is really, really over. PLEASE, tell me what you thought of it!