"Ohhh Hannah, this was a terrible idea." The Queen said rubbing her temples and stretching up in her throne popping her poor aching back. "Whoever designed the royal throne should be shot for causing harm to the Queen, treason, and something else… I'm not sure what but there's got to be something they can tack on."

Hannah laughed from her seat which seemed to be considerably more comfortable. "Nah, this was a great plan!" She said eagerly taking a drink from one of the bottles of wine she had been given. "Just for the comedy value alone! I can't believe you put the guy that set 'imself on fire trying to impress you by juggling torches in the "no" pile."

"You're only saying that because this was YOUR plan, plus he nearly burned down the castle by setting the runner on fire!"

"Eh, we put both him and that out and he was very apologetic about it. I'm sure he'd have his eyebrows back by the time you got married!"

Queen Sparrow groaned once more and looked like she was about tear her hair out; they had been at this day in and out for a whole week. "There's just... so… many!" She said waving her hands in frustration.

"Never fear your majesty, for I am here to put an end to your marital woes!" Cried a painfully familiar voice bursting through the double doors and walking in as if he owned the place, followed by two men that were obviously just two of his pirate crew members that he had shoved into suits.

Hannah choked on her wine before she could say anything.

"Is that so Reaver? Back from your exotic adventures in Samarkand already?" Sparrow said not at all pleased to see him.

"Word of the Queen looking for a suitable mate travels fast my dear, and who more suitable than Reaver to wed a Queen of Albion, hm?" He chortled approaching closer with his men motioning for them to put the boxes before her. "Pretty dresses and trinkets from my long journey for a pretty woman."

"What on Earth do you think she would even consider marring you?" Hannah said standing up ready to take a swing at the scum. "She's not stupid you know, not only would you be disloyal to her but all of us know that you just want to be king and get to the royal treasury."

"…Not to mention, if it may of slipped your mind Reaver, that you attempted to kill me not once… but twice Reaver. You best thank your lucky stars I have not put a bounty upon your head." Sparrow hissed gripping the edges of her throne.

"Water under the bridge my dear! I would never dream of trying a stunt like that… a third time. We both know that you would probably pass laws long before we were wed so that I wouldn't see a single shiny gold piece of the money, I have no use for it anyway and after all it is abundantly clear that this will be a marriage of convenience not of… monogamy! Heavens no! It's all about continuing the royal line after all."

Hannah was about to make a snotty retort but Sparrow stayed her by raising her hand to silence her considering this. "What's your angle Reaver?" She questioned slowly willing to entertain the idea.

"What can I say? The title "King Reaver" has always tickled me and it is high time that the world be properly graced by my superior genetics and who better to pass them on than another Hero who- if I must say, is quite easy on the eyes as well. Not as much as me, of course, hopefully the children shall take after me but you have good bone structure and I have always wondered how I would look blonde… perhaps if we had a girl she would inherit your ample cleave as well." He said letting his mind wander.

"That's sick Reaver. What are you doing? Planning on making your possible daughter a future lover?" Hammer said making a face like she was going to throw up.

Reaver got that look on his face he made when he was to make a sadistic remark when the Queen silenced them both by stamping her foot.

"This is true and he is right in a way Hannah. We all know this marriage is purely for the continuation of the line, should we have children their chances of being Heroes as well would greatly increase, thus insuring the safety of the kingdom in the future if it comes under attack." She said pondering this, stroking her chin thoughtfully. Reaver gave Hammer a smug look and she could have sworn he was about to churlishly stick his tongue out at her when Sparrow continued on her train of thought.

"And it is because of this I would have considered Garth as a prime candidate for this marriage, however his preferences speak for themselves."

"Wot… Because he's gay? I'm sure he would take one for the team if you asked Sparrow." Hammer said nonchalantly.

"Ahem." She said giving Hannah a dirty look before the continued. "As I was saying…I shall consider you Reaver...IF you accept the following conditions: You are to be a figure head and nothing more, you shall have no power over the people of Albion. I shudder to think what you would do should I give you any position of authority. Second, like you said you will never see a single piece of gold from the treasury." The monarch said holding up her fingers with authority.

"Precisely as I predicted." He said nodding in boastful agreement at the cleverness of himself. "Now shall we draw up the papers or-"

"I'm not done." The Queen said testily and Reaver looked as though he swallowed a lemon.

"Dearest…What more could there be?" He cooed as nicely as he muster.

"At the time of my death you would be stripped of your title as King leaving it to our heir or heirs, do not take me for a fool Reaver. Laws come and go as well as monarchs and I will not give the title of "King" to someone who I know to be practically immortal with your ways."

His jaw flapped open and shut, for once at a loss for words because she had seen right though him. He had hoped to bide his time and overturn her laws in her passing. He composed himself, a minor setback at best and a toothy pained grin spread across his face.

"…But of course …Majesty… You are wise beyond your years… No we should get this show on the road? Of do you have more stipulations to add?" It was obvious he was growing impatient as he began to nervously tap his foot.

"I said you were in the running Reaver, not that I had agreed to your proposal. There are several Inns nearby the castle and when I am done deliberating I shall send a note dictating whether or not you made the cut. Thank you for the gifts and, just maybe, I shall see you soon. Goodbye." Sparrow said leaning in a corner of her chair trying to get comfortable again.

Reaver hissed and sputtered losing his composure. "Made the cut?!" He parroted.

"Why yes, the most eligible bachelors in all of Albion are competing for my hand Reaver. I have a multitude of choices. I shall narrow them down to oh… I don't know… Hannah? What do you think?"

"I would think at LEAST a top five." Hannah said grinning innocently at Reaver who was glaring daggers at the woman.

"A top five then, to go on dates and get to know them better." Sparrow said pretending to be aloof and trying not to laugh for once being the one to turn the tables and send Reaver into a tizzy.

"Very well then!" He snapped. "I expect your response soon. I shall prepare myself to wine and dine you."

"That's nice luv, tatty bye then." Hannah said unable to restrain herself from using his signature remark.

"Humph!" Reaver said forcefully making a dramatic exit with his henchmen in tow trying to keep pace, slamming the doors behind him as both of the women broke out into laughter.

"Oh my god did you see his face? To my dying day I shall remember the "Angry face of Reaver"!" The Queen cried in her laughter trying to imitate the ugly look similar to a child being denied a toy.

"I know, right?!" Hammer was wiping away her tears. "He looked like he was about to have kittens!"

Sparrow calmed herself and turned to Walter, her chief guardsmen, "Walter, be a dear and toss him in the "consideration" pile would you?"

"Do you really think that wise your majesty?" He said holing the pages in question.

"Despite him being a massive prick that is easily mocked I was serious that he is a viable candidate simply because our children would have a greater chance in being Heroes as well. As much as I would like to find love the kingdom comes first."

"If you say so…" Hannah shrugged as Walter tossed the application on the very short pile of "maybes".

"Shall we send the next one in?" He asked gingerly.

"Ugh…" She looked out the window seeing the sun was setting. "Just one, it's almost dinner time anyway." She sighed tiredly with a gesture of her hand.

"Alright." Walter barked to the other guards. "One more and tell the rest of the poor sods to go home until tomorrow."

They saluted them and made their way to the door.

"How many more do you think there is?"

"Who knows?"