Hello people of Fanfiction. I have come with another story. This is the re-edited version and turned out to be 2,000 words longer than the first time I wrote it. It took me a while to get into the mood of writing it. This topic is somewhat hard for me to do but I love the angst and confusion of feelings that go along with this topic. Plus, I am best writing these kinds of story. Stories were the love isn't like a storybook love but has its issues and is very real. Well, ignore the rambling and on with the story!

Warnings! angst, probably massive OOCness, yaoi and rape(non-con). I repeat, their is non-con at first. If this is not something you like reading, press the back button.

I do not own Kuroshitsuji, I simply own this plot and its characters.

Grell walked though the dimly lit hallway, his royal red colored robe slipping off his shoulder. The few lanterns that were lit casted an eerie glow on everything, creating shadows that seemed to reach out towards him. His breath echoed, his footsteps silent against the carpet, and his heart beating a steady pace.

Will.

That was the only thought as he stopped in front of a black wooden door. He slowly pushed it in, the musk that was purely Will flooding his nose; it beckoned him to go inside the room to meet what he knew would be his end, his undoing. It had been the same routine for months now: he would visit Will and let him have his way with him, then Will would leave him alone to pick himself up and the next day, act like nothing had ever happened between them. Grell vaguely remembered what started the whole thing: booze. Apparently, Will was a very sadistic man and seemed to only reveal that part of himself when he was stone cold drunk. Will ended up raping him in an alleyway (he still even had the scars on his back from the wall to prove it). From then on, it just spiraled downward and now he was, standing just inside of Will's room, waiting for the commands that Will gives him every night. Fate must have not liked him for it tortured him with Will, yet told him that he would never be able to have the relationship that he wanted with said man.

"Come in." Said a smooth, velvety voice from inside the room. Grell fought the urge to shudder, knowing it would turn Will on even more and make the night more painful for him. Despite his looks, attitude, and personality, he was a vanilla lover and adored sweet caresses and soft whispered words of love, which was everything that Will wasn't. Maybe if he had simply stuck to his fantasies and had fought Will off a little harder that faithful night, the nightmare wouldn't exist. After that night, Will cornered him at the office and told him to visit his room every night of a video of their acts would be played for the whole world to see. Shame simply forced Grell to say yes. At least, that what he kept telling himself, his heart simply refusing the other reason why he had said yes.

Slipping back into reality, Grell walked into the room and waited for Will's instructions, steadying his breath which had started to speed up in nervousness.

"You're late tonight." Grell didn't even dare touch the statement with a ten foot pole. It was more deadly answering back than walking across a land full of minefields.

"This means I'll have to punish you." Gripping his fist tightly, he forced himself to keep his mouth shut. Hands wrapped around his shoulders, gently squeezing around his throat.

"You know, I could kill you right now if I wanted too."

'At least I wouldn't have to suffer this agony anymore.' Will's hands suddenly let go of his neck and grabbed his privates roughly, making Grell whimper out in slight pain.

"Don't make a sound." Commanded Will. Grell nodded frantically, biting his lower lip to keep any noises from spilling out of his mouth. Will continued to roughly fondle Grell, the action somehow (as always) managing to turn him on to an extent.

"On your hands and knees, now." Grell did as he was told, his breathing faster than normal. Silence descended on the room for a second before the crack of a whip echoed, a sting to Grell's ass moments later.

Crack.

Crack.

Crack.

Over and over again, Will whacked him, the sting of the leather on his backside becoming too much for Grell to handle; soon, small sobs left his lips, the whip hitting him harder the more he let out his cries.

"Have you learned your lesson?" Will asked.

"Yes."

"Yes what?" The whip smacked across Grell's shoulder's this time, making his hiss in pain.

"Yes sir!"

"That's a good boy." Cooed Will, his hands coming up and grabbing Grell's hair, jerking his head back.

"I smell blood. Did you bite through your lip again?" Grell quickly ran his tongue over his bottom lip, realizing that he did indeed bite through it. Closing his eyes, he forced himself not to back at Will. He refused to look directly at his face during their intimate acts like he did their first time together.

Grell's robe completely slipped off of him, making his breath hitch as the cool air his body. Soon, he was flipped onto his back, his nipples were tweaked and his navel tickled; anything to get a noise or a reaction. But Grell kept silent. It wasn't out of defiance so much as out of self preservation. Grell knew they turned Will on, meaning that he would go faster. That; and who knew how Will would react if he accidentally let his true feelings slip out. Will's hands finally left his body, leaving Grell tense with anticipation. This was the part where Will would shove himself into Grell without preparation. This was the part where Grell would cry out in pain. This was the part when Will would release inside of him and then leave Grell to clean himself up and pick up the shattered pieces of his broken heart.

Instead, fingers came to rest gently on his lips, the ones he bit clean through.

"Why do you insist on not looking at me while we're in bed?" Grell started at Will's voice. It had emotion in it; calculative and, how should he put it, a bit sad.

"You know, I talked to that bastard yesterday." The bastard Will was referring to being Sebastian, "And he said something quite interesting. I just can't seem to wrap my head around it."

What was with all the talking? Why did Will suddenly bring up Sebastian? What was the reason for the change of pace?

Grell began to feel panic start to seep into his whole being, his body shaking with the intensity of it.

"Shh." Will commanded. The sound made Grell freeze. He wanted to open his eye, to see what Will's expression was, but didn't dare too.

"I talked to Sebastian and he said that he saw you crying by a river." Grell remembered that night. It was after a particularly rough night (pun intended). Will had been much harder with the whip and had left bleeding welts on his skin along with a dislocated shoulder. He had ran away, not being able to handle to feelings of loneliness in his chest. He had actually contemplated feeding himself to the lowly demons (a gruesome death for a reaper); anything to escape his feelings. But he couldn't do it. He thought of Will's face and his resolve crumbled. Even when contemplating death, he thought of Will.

"Why were you crying?" Will's tone of voice commanded an answer yet Grell kept silent. Silence was golden. Silence was safety. Silence was the only thing that was keeping him in a sense, sane.

"Tell me!" Shout Will. Suddenly, like a lightening bolt, a poem Grell wrote long ago popped into his head. One he had written to Will. Poetry helped him (somewhat) to cope with everything and the particular poem he was thinking about meant the world to him. Did he want to take the risk and say the poem and risk Will getting furious at him or did he want to keep it too himself, letting it collect dust in his mind. Grell thought for a nanosecond beside he decided to take the risk.

Grell slowly opened his and looked at Will's face, whose facial expression went from angry to shocked. Grell felt his tears slid down his cheeks and like a broken dam, his pent up feelings flooded out of him. More tears fell down his face and his breathing became labored. Grell took a deep breath to steady himself and began reciting the poem he memorized long ago.

"Take me. Take me in your arms, my love, and rape me. I wish that you would love me as I have loved you, but I know that that is simply a petty fantasy. I am yours now and forever. Of that, my love, there really is no question. My better half, it's true, has seen the darker side of you. My innocence was stripped away yet I can't find it within myself to hate you. I wish you would come to love me as I have always loved you." By the end of the poem, Grell's body was shaking with sobs, the words barely understandable. The hurt of knowing that he wasn't special to Will make his heart scream in agony. Now that Will knew his true feelings, he would laugh at him or sneer at his emotions. Before any of that could happen though, Grell had to say the three words he had always wanted to say.

'If I'm going to confess my feelings, I might as well go all the way.'

"I'M SORRY WILL! I LOVE YOU! I'M SORRY FOR LOVING YOU!" Grell chocked on air as he sobbed out his confession, trying to inhale with his heaving lungs.

"Damnit Grell, Breathe!" He was flipped onto his back and patted him roughly, Will's attempt to get him to breathe. Grell took in a shuddering breath and looked over his shoulder. His eyes teared up once more just by the sight of Will's face.

"What are you going to do now? Laugh at me? Kill me? Dump me somewhere?" Will looked shocked at Grell's suggestions.

"Just get it over with. Come on. I can't handle the pain anymore." A fresh wave of tears filled Grell's eyes once more and he buried his head into a pillow, not daring to look at Will as he made his decision on what to do with him.

"You never told me." A hand gently laid itself on his back, Will's voice washing over him.

"Why would I? You never showed you cared about me." Grell heard a sigh behind him and then suddenly, he was flipped onto his back. His breath stolen away from the fire, the need, that was in Will's eyes.

"It seems we have both been fools." Not explaining himself, Grell opened his mouth to ask what he meant when a pair of lips crashed onto his. A tongue shoved itself in and rubbed against Grell's, making him whimper, partly in pain and partly in pleasure. Will must have heard the sound because he pulled back, staring down at Grell.

"What are you-!"

"I'm sorry." Those two words stopped any thought that Grell had in his mind.

"What?"

"I said, I'm sorry. Tell me, can you guess as to why I blackmailed you?" Grell slowly shook his head no, not knowing where Will was headed with his sentence.

"Because I wanted you." No. It was too good to be true.

"You're lying" Said Grell through his tears.

"I'm not. I thought, at least this way, I would be able to have your body." Feeling tears gather in the corner of his eyes again, Grell tried to turn his face away but Will's hands came and grasped his face gently; as if it was made of glass.

"Let me have you for tonight. I am by no means a gentle lover; you have seen that. But I want to make this work. I know I have...abused you..." Will seemed to stumble over his words and something akin to pride swelled in Grell, knowing that he was the cause of Will losing his normally perfect composer. "...and I have probably hurt you in ways I can't imagine, but...I...I'm beg-begging for you to give me a second chance. I understand if you push me away right now and refuse to never speak to me again, but please consider being with...with me." Will took in a deep breath as he finish his speech, daring to look up at Grell.

His eyes widen in shock as Grell's scarred arms (most of them caused by him) wrapped firmly around his neck, bringing his body down to lay flush against Grell's.

"I have accepted everything about you long ago. The good and the bad. I wouldn't think of anywhere else I would rather be." Said Grell, casting aside his fears that the whole situation that was happening was part of Will's master plan to tease him into submission. Soft lips pressed themselves to his neck, making Grell hiss in reluctant pleasure at the contact.

"I'll try being gentle; no promises though." More kiss were rained down on Grell's neck, making him softly moan from the soft touch. Never before had he felt such tenderness from Will. It was always pain, pain, pain, and now that he had a taste of something sweeter and gentler, Grell wasn't sure he would ever be able to go back. Hands pressed themselves under Grell's back and he turned as Will rolled them over, their bodies reversed from what it was before.

"Grell." The way Will said his name made Grell's heart beat speed up. Slowly, Grell raised a hand to brush at Will's lips, asking him with his eyes if it was okay to touch. If it was okay to show his love for Will. With a simple nod of his head, he gave Grell permission to explore his body.

Grell's fingers instantly trailed Will's lips, ran over his cheeks, touching every part of his face. Leaning in, Grell pressed his lips to Will's. Will's tongue pushed past Grell's lips with ease and devoured his mouth, a shocked moan leaving Grell. Their tongues tangoed with each other for eternity before the need to breath had them pulling apart. The kiss seemed to snap something in Will for his hands started to roam all over Grell's body, squeezing his butt numerous times. Grell ignored the sting of his back in favor of slowly rutting against Will's leg. Said leg came up and rubbed back, hard, making Grell see stars across his vision.

"Will!" Grell moaned breathlessly. A shudder went through Will at his name being called out, fingers moving up from Grell's butt and to his lips.

"Suck." Grell's breath hitched and his eyes started to water. This was going to be the first time Will would ever prepare him. Letting the fingers slip into his mouth, Grell closed his eyes and focused on coating them thoroughly, sucking on them with vigor. They forcefully left his mouth and trailed down his body, making him shudder. Soon, the same fingers he coated with his spit parted his butt cheeks and slowly rimmed his hole.

"Are you ready?" Grell nodded his head, burrowing his face into Will's neck. His finger continued to rim him for a bit longer before it pushed in, going all the way up to his knuckle.

"AHN!" A violent shudder went through Grell as the finger kept sliding in and out of him, a second one joining it.

"Will! More! Please!" More moans continued to spill from Grell's lips as Will continued to stretch him out. Soon, a third finger joined and a slight twinge of pain. They soon left his body, making Grell slump against Will's solid chest. Will grabbed Grell's hips and raised them, positioning himself just outside his hole.

"You ready?" That was the first time Will had ever asked that question. Nodding yes, Grell braced himself as Will slowly slid in his body, not stopping till he was balls deep. Shudder racked Grell's body as he tried to get use to the intrusion. It was an odd feeling, considering how he never truly felt Will since he always would just thrust in and out with vigor; it was a strange sensation. Will's hands gripped his hips tightly, his hands shaking with the effort of staying still.

"So tight." Hissed Will, bucking up instinctively. A gasp left Grell and some of Will's self-control slipped as he pulled completely out and snapped his hips forward, burring himself in Grell's heat.

"NNH." Grunted Grell, a hint of pain in his voice.

"Shit, sorry Grell." Will's hands moved from his hips up to his shoulder, where Will pulled Grell's body flush against his. They stayed still for what seemed like forever, Will stumbling over words of comfort, his awkwardness of showing comfort evident in his speech. The next thrust was from Grell, who slowly grinded back. Will's hand stopped him and he looked at Grell's eyes.

"Just hold still a minute! If you move, I won't be able to control myself." Grell ignored Will's warning and pushed back yet again, his mouth falling open and eyelids fluttered in bliss.

"That's fine. I just want to feel you." Grell slowly set up the pace, heaving himself up and slowly sinking back down, a breathy moan leaving his lips every time; the feel of Will overloading his senses.

"God Will! Ah!...so good...!"

"Shit. Grell, I'm sorry." Grell made a questioning noise in the back of his throat at the apology but yelped when he was flipped onto his back, Will slipping out of him at the action.

"Will?" Grell looked back at him, his breath catching in his throat as Will grasped and positioned himself back at Grell's entrance, his hands shaking with desire. With a single snap of his hips, Will buried himself into Grell, Grell's mouth opening wide as his nearly screamed, but not in pain, but rather in bliss. Will grasped both of Grell's ankles, spreading them apart, and pulled back before snapping forward again. The bed creaked with the force of the thrusts, the air filling with the scent of sweat and sex. Grell's breath screams were followed by Will's grunts as they moved closer and closer to the release they both needed and wanted.

"C-Can't Last." Grell managed to cry out, his hands finding purchase in the bed-sheets underneath him. Will just grunted and moved faster, trying to make them both cum. Somehow managing to loosen his grip on the sheets, he brought his hands up to wrap around Will's shoulders.

"Grell." The way Will said his name; it was like he was worshiping a god or something and it was ultimately Grell's undoing. The cord that had been tightening in his stomach snapped and with a loud cry, Grell's essence went all over his chest, painting it in a pearly white. Will moaned low in his chest, the tight grip around his dick tightening even more. With a few more earth-shattering thrusts, he came inside Grell, his load being to much for Grell's body; it started to leak out around Will's member, trickling in-between his cheeks. Grell wrinkled his nose at the sensation but focused on the euphoric (1) feeling of love that was in him. Will collapsed onto him, the only sound in the room was their heavy breathing. Will's arms wrapped around Grell's torso, pulling him close; their heartbeats in sync with one another.

"What happens now?" Asked Grell, breaking the silence. He didn't want to go back to the way things were or even worse, have Will brush the whole 'thing' off. His heart was content for the first time since their twisted relationship started. For the first time, he felt whole, complete. Will hummed in thought, before he huffed, pushing himself up to look at Grell's face.

"Isn't it obvious? You're moving your stuff to my room. That is, if you want to." Will quickly added the last sentence, making his demand turn into a suggestion. A stunning smile lit up Grell's face as he registered Will's words. He snuggled up to Will and closed his eyes, reveling in the feeling of happiness and Will's fingers tracing random patterns on his skin.

Grell wasn't dumb; he knew they had a lot of obstacles to work through and a lot of actions to forgive and forget, but Grell would be willing to work through it; after all, it would be for the only person he had ever truly loved.

Made fate liked him after all.

(1)- It took me 10 minutes to think of this word...I even had to get my stepmothers help on figuring out what word I was trying to get at.

Story Idea adoptions are open and waiting for people to claim them. The ideas are about No.6, Hellsing, Naruto, Hetalia, and Kuroshitsuji. Please check my profile page and just have a quick look at them.

Thanks for reading and please review! They make me die from happiness :)