So you would think the last four months going smoothly would make me happy. Taylor and I are back on track, it's like a switch was flipped and he is giving everything I want, with the exception of one thing. But even that is not so bad; he is making up for it in many many creative ways. I wake up every morning with him beside me in my bed and go to bed sweaty and satiated. I know that Taylor is never really able to relax, but Sawyer knows the truth about us and that makes it easier, one less person to hide from. I think Andrea my assistant knows as well, she keeps dropping little hints here and there. Then there is Mia who has been hot on my tail about Taylor since that day of the party. I wish I could tell her, I wish I had someone I could confide in but for all her good points Mia has a huge mouth. She would slip and then what?

Business is going well. We are up nearly four percent this quarter and I can't help but feeling proud of that. The changes I have implemented have gone off without a hitch. SS is moving ahead and growing when most companies are showing great losses. We have hired fifty new employees on top of the hires my father has been making for the new contracts. A Chinese Company offered to buy os out lock stock and barrel. It was nice to turn them down.

There has been little in the way of threats or attacks. I can tell the entire security team as relaxed a bit, not in their care but in their stress level. Somehow I can't help but feel like this is the calm before the storm. That the game to kill me and my father is just about to begin again. I still have nightmare about it but there is little I can do. I just chose to ignore it.

My father is so immersed in his new project he is leaving me to my own devices. The new facility has fallen a bit behind but that was expected. We keep changing the plans to accommodate my father's grand ideas. The new building and hiring of staff is taking up most of his time and what time he isn't spending on work he is spending with Maya Jose is gone, he completed his basic training and excelled in tactical defense and sharpshooting. He was stationed in Kabul the last I heard. I get letters sometimes and we Skype whenever possible. Jose looks so different now, older and surer of himself. His long locks are gone, and his face has thinned out a bit, but he has also gotten bigger and broader. He looks and talks like a man now. He called me Ma'am and I wanted to slap him through my computer screen. My dad always knows where he is and what is happening. I know that he does what he can to keep him safe but he is fighting a war for crying out loud. He will never be safe enough as far as I am concerned.

Ethan has made amazing strides on the shelter, we are right on schedule and I am already planning the opening ceremonies which are only two months away. Grace has been helping me and in turn I have been helping her with the Coping Together benefit that she is planning for September. I am really so grateful to her for so many reasons. With so much happening these last few months and everything that is to come it is nice to have someone older and wiser to talk to.

The Skyroom is finally done, today is opening day. I have a ribbon to cut and everything. Christian asked me to stay away the past few weeks so I can see it completed for the first time. Christian… I still don't know what I feel about him. It's a strange thing, like magnets pulling and pushing at one another. He pisses me off, so damn much and I keep vowing to stay away from him but I can't. So our friendship, or whatever we have has grown a lot too. We often have lunch together, coffee in the morning, dinner a few times. We text sometimes. Nothing different than what I do with Mia or Kate. I have had to explain to Taylor that Christian is to me what Jose is to me, a good trusted friend. It took some convincing (for me and for him) but no I feel like Christian is like a brother and a much needed friend. I hope he feels the same about me. I think that he does. He doesn't share much about his life and past before his mother died. He often gets distant and vacant, sadness takes over him and he withdraws from me, from everyone really. I know when he gets like that he runs to Elena and she is the balm that sets him back on track. I hate that she is able to do that for him but I know that I cannot. One day that secret is going to rear its ugly head and blow up in both of their faces and I hope that he can survive the blast.

So pretty much everything is falling perfectly into place and I am still miserable. I feel like a drone, just going through the motions without any real attachment and I am angry all the time. I often have to stifle my mouth to prevent offending anyone. Everything annoys me. Another summer is almost over and I have not taken a single day off to go to the beach or even to go for a hike. I need a vacation. I need a week in a tropical place with no one around for miles. Except for Taylor. My father owns an island of the coast of Tahiti, I haven't been yet, either has he for that matter. There is little time for vacations or time off when there is work to do and equity to build. Maybe this will be the year I will finally go.

My closet is full of suits and dresses and I stand before it lost as to what to wear. Normally any suit will do but today there will be photos and I know I will be standing beside Christian while they are taken. I know he too will be in a suit and I want to look like his equal. This has always been my problem, my age and stature makes photos like this look silly. I chose a slim cut black suit that I had made for me last year. The skirt is above the knee and the jacket is so sharp and nipped you could slice your finger open on black pumps and deep royal blue shirt pull it all together. I pull my hair back into a tight ponytail and apply my makeup. I feel like a warrior today and nothing can stop me.

"You ready to go Darlin'… hot damn." He looks at me and I watch him in the mirror as he lets out a low whistle. I blush under his gaze and smile broadly. "You look. Wow."

"Well thank you… Darlin'" Yeah, nothing can stop me today.

He walks into my office and just like I suspected he is dressed like a movie star. His suit was as sharp as mine, a deep slate grey with a lighter grey pinstripe. It's a three piece suit and the vest fits him like a second skin. His shirt is white linen and the tie is the same pale grey at the pinstripe. He looks amazing. There is no other word for it.

"Hello Christian." I stand up from behind my desk and greet him formally, extending my hand to shake his. His eyebrow furrows and he complies, gently taking my hand in his. He smells well, amazing. I spicy mix of things I cannot place.

"Hi Ana. You look nice today." Nice! I look much more than nice.

"So do you. Are you excited?"

"Yeah, I have to say that I am." I can see he is trying to hide his pride but he is failing miserably. It oozes off of him like sex usually does.

"I am too. I cant wait to see what you have done. You mom has called like a thousand times…" He grimaces and crosses his arms across his large chest.

"I'm sorry if she has been bothering you, Grace gets – excited."

"She is not a bothers. She is just so happy for you." There is so much more I want to say but Andrea opens the door and tells us that everyone is ready. Taylor is beside her looking stern as usual. He tells us that the security team is already in place, as in the press and a large number of our staff. The office has been buzzing about Skyfloor for the past few weeks. I walk beside Christian to the elevators and his hand finds its way to the small of my back leading me through the doors of my office. Taylor wraps his hand around my forearm, bulling me towards him. It is overwhelming standing wedged between the two of the, r in such a small space and my mind flashes back to a time when Taylor and I were in the elevator together. Their two very distinct smells, the sound of their rapid breathing. I can feel the tension of this moment. I can feel my breath quicken but I refuse to even look at either one of them. I keep my gaze on the floor to my feet and wait for the doors to open again. The relief I feel at the sound of the ding is quickly replaced by the swarms of people standing outside the doors. A few flash bulb pop, and there is a collective hum from everyone talking. Taylor leads me through the crowd to the large glass doors. I see Grace and Elliott and Mia, all three with broad smiles on their faces, they are literally beaming with pride.

I have a speech prepared, talking about the valued employees and how we are trying to break the mold for employee/employer relations. I want to talk about Christian and Elliott and the work they do for us. I want to talk about the charity too. I speak quickly and cut the big red ribbon. The doors push open and I take the first steps into Skyfloor. My breath is taken away. The room looks even larger than before, like it is floating above the skyline. The focus of the room is the huge suspended light from above. It is more beautiful and grand then hos design could have ever shown. The Plexiglas glows from within and looks like it was made in heaven. I look back at Christian and he is watching me intently looking for my reaction. I smile at him and shake my head, and God help me if he didn't blush just a little bit.

Taylor leads me to a small podium, where I will give my speech. Christian to my left and Taylor to my right. The press settles around us and before I can even open my mouth to speak it begins.

"CHRISTIAN tell is about Jack Hyde!?

"Did you kill your girlfriends lover out of spite or rage?"

"When was the last time you spoke to Lela Williams?"

The flash bulbs are going off and the questions keeping asked louder and harsher than before. It all happens so quickly but Christian walks past me like flash of grey and out of instinct I follow him. I can feel the frantic energy as the crowd surrounds us and then I feel his hand wrap around mine pulling me with him to the elevator. I see Taylor lunge at the door just as they close and I hear him yell out a few well-placed profanities.

Christian is like a hungry lion in a cage. He is walking back and forth, almost panting. He punches his fist into the wall cracking the mirror, staining it with blood. He then pulls the emergency button and the elevator comes to a screeching halt. I stand there and watch and he leans against the wall, head down hands on his knees.

"Christian are you okay?" He looks up at me, and I can tell from the look in his eyes that he is not okay.

"It's never going to go away is it Ana?" He sounds like a broken child and though I want to reach out and hold him, I am scared of him right now. He is like a bomb waiting to go off and I realize that I am trapped in this elevator with him. There is no security, no Taylor, no one between me and this man. "No matter how much time passes Hyde will always have the last laugh." His words are bitter and simmering with rage.

"Christian, the press is the press. I have been dealing with them or years. They will always rehash what should long be forgotten. They wanted a reaction out of you and they got one." He stands up tall and looks down at me; I take a step back and press myself against the wall. "Your hand is bleeding." He looks down at his injured fist and pulls the pocket square out of his lapel wrapping it tightly around his knuckles.

"Are you scared of me Ana?" I am scared not of him, well maybe I am but I am really scared for him.

"No," I take a step closer to him in an effort to harness my strength. This is essentially a negotiation, and if I think of it like that I know I can win. He wants to scare me and I want to tame him. That is where out battle will lie.

"You should be, I'm a murderer after all. And that's one of my better points. I fuck married women and you should only know what I like to down to brown haired girls like you. But then again you have a file on me, so maybe you do know. Maybe that is why you befriended me. So I can give you what you need."

"What I need? You have no idea what I need Christian. But I know what you need. You need to grow up. You need to stop acting like an erratic child every time something does not go your way. You need to stop running to Elena when you out of control and you need to stop holding on to the past." I can feel my heart beating in my chest and the look on his face change from anger to desire and everything just stops. "Don't Christian." My words are said in vain because in two large steps his arms are around my waist pushing me against his body and then pressing my back against the wall of the elevator.

"Don't what? Don't touch you, don't kiss you, don't want you? The man that you love, does he make you feel like this?" Before I can answer his lips are crashing into mine. I am vaguely aware that there is a camera recording every move we make but I don't care. I wrap my arms around his neck and allow this kiss to consume me. His body feels rigid against my melting frame. His touch is causing me to dissolve; my knees feel weak, actually weak. I feel him pick of the slack of my weigh and a small growl escapes the back of his throat. We have silently simmered for months and now we have boiled over. He is different from Taylor is every way. There is no question in his kiss, nothing held back. There is no sadness in it either. His mouth is warm and smooth and he moves his tongue against mine with precision, like he knows what he is making me feel. His fingers dig into the flesh of my ass, it hurts but feels good at the same time and I rise up on my toes, pressing myself into him. I feel like this kiss is going to destroy me. That every kiss will be held to this moment and nothing will ever be the same. Fear sets in and I remember Taylor is out there somewhere worried about me. Taylor who loves me, who I love. Taylor who keeps me safe and happy. Christian is just lashing out and looking for something to take away his pain and I was the closest thing. I push him away with clenched fists, but he is unrelenting. I manage to break my mouth away from his and mutter that he should stop. He smirks and lowers his lips back down to mine. I don't know what comes over me but I reach my hand back and manager to slap him across the face. He is stunned for a moment and releases me from his grasp.

"What the fuck Ana?" I walk past him and push the button; the elevator continues its descent down to my office. The doors open and with shaky legs I walk out. I hear him call out my name but I ignore him, closing my office doors behind me. I feel numb. Totally and completely numb.

I sit at my desk head in my hands and wait, I wait for Taylor and I know he won't be happy. I know that in one moment of stupidity I have destroyed all I have fought for with him. I hear his footsteps and I brace myself as the door slowly opens. His usually stone-cold face is marred with hurt and sadness and my hearts cracks because I am the cause of it.

"Taylor…I…" He lifts up his hand and I stop talking. I can't even look him in the eye. He walks towards me and sits down in the chair leaning his elbows on his knees.

"You're friendship with him is over Ana. I saw… everything… and it's over."

"I know. Taylor I fucked up. I'm so sorry."

"I can't right now Ana, right now I am acting as your security lead, not your boyfriend. I just watched a man mall you in the elevator. If you liked it or not, right now I just can't wrap my head around any of it."

"I did like it… I can't lie and say I didn't. I've only really ever kissed you. But then when the thrill wore off and the shock and surprise dissipated, you were on my mind and in my heart."

"Are you sure about that Ana, really sure?"

"Yes. I am." But there was this small voice deep inside my heart that was telling me I was not.