This is a story I've been writing on the side, even before I decided to start on Adoption. Looks like I'm running into a wall at the moment, so I'm just going to put up other things and see how people like it. Almost all my ideas are insertions, but yeah, I like them. So there. This one's basically an insert of 'myself' into Sawada Tsunayoshi, because I wanted to try something well-used and probably overdone but see if I could manage not to screw it up. And to those who've read Adoption, I'm pretty sure they already know how much I like exploring untold childhoods.

In this case, it'll probably be a lot more serious than Adoption, but hey, I was in a different mood. Hopefully you guys like it. I'll see about brushing up the next chapter and uploading it.

Ever wonder what happens after death? Well, of course you have. Everyone's given at least a thought to what happens after they expire and I'm no different.

I often debated between an eternal afterlife and a constant cycle of reincarnations. On rainy days, the afterlife won, on good ones, I was rather of the opinion that I'd like to stay on Earth just a little longer.

Unfortunately, it seems I wouldn't have that question put to rest just yet.

While it wasn't death that brought me into this world, it was death that was the result when I was pulled in.

I sometimes still wonder if it had been the right thing to do—if I was the right person for such a great responsibility, but most times I've stopped wondering.

I just do.

After all, it's obvious that there was nobody worthy enough to completely replace one Sawada Tsunayoshi.

xXXx

My eyes cracked opened slowly, still heavy from sleep and disappearing dreams. I blinked rapidly several times to clear my vision—my eyes usually got really dry and/or gummy when I slept, and sometimes I wouldn't be able to see straight even after I'd fully awakened.

Shaking my head, I rubbed my still-blurry left eye a little before looking around.

I promptly rubbed my eyes and blinked frantically again. My sight was usually a little skewed in the morning, but never like this.

Where was I? I couldn't tell you even if I tried—so surreal it appeared. I was floating in midair, surrounded by what seemed to be galaxies and stars and slowly orbiting planets. The sight was very captivating and I sighed dreamily (pun intended).

Well, I didn't get to enjoy the view for very long because a voice piped up right in my ear.

"Finally! We've got a lot of stuff to go through—you took your time waking up!"

Spinning around but finding nothing, I shrugged in answer to the possible Cheshire Cat watching over me.

"Okay! Here's the deal—we need you to replace one Sawada Tsunayoshi's place in his world. That's the one you know as Katekyo Hitman Reborn manga by the way."

I'm sorry, wahhhh?

But, being the very adaptable person I am, I deadpanned.

"I'm a girl."

I had a feeling that he had waved his hand absently, "Doesn't matter. Souls don't have a fixed gender. It's more a mind thing."

I blinked. Well.

I had never thought myself fanciful enough to actually dream up a self-insert scenario—much less one as the vaunted Vongola Decimo himself.

And truth be told, I didn't really want to. Powerful as he became later on, spending the first 15 years of his life as Dame-Tsuna wasn't exactly something I'd wish to go through. And even if I were allowed to skip ahead right into the KHR arc… I'd never fancied myself a hero and I certainly would never be able to amass as much support as the eternally soft-hearted and generous original.

So, I shook my head. No thanks.

"… That's not exactly the deal. You don't get a choice on replacing him. And get it out of your mind that this is a dream. It isn't."

I deadpanned at the air in front of me. What else could it be?

I yelped at a sharp pinch of pain at my side, clasping hands to it. While I did get injured in dreams, the feelings were usually more vague and distant than this…

It'll take more than that to convince me that something as strange as this is real…

"Then how about I show you your body?" The voice snarked impatiently.

A window opened up beside me. Peering into it, I could make out me on my bed cocooned in my soft quilt as was my usual habit. The view was strange and slightly disconcerting, like looking into a mirror that was slanted, but still allowing peripheral vision. I stared a little before something caught my eye.

I wasn't breathing.

There was new meaning to Cheshire's words. I've dreamt of dead people, of dying, of killing and just general mayhem, but I've never actually pictured my own death so clearly. There was a distant feel of impending panic, which I hurriedly squashed in order to ask the obvious question.

"Why am I not breathing?"

My throat was dry without my morning cup of water and the sound I made was more akin to croaking than speaking, but the words were discernible.

"Isn't it obvious? You're dead."

I always thought that dry swallowing was impossible, but my mouth and throat were completely dry when I did so. My hands had started shaking and I took deep breaths. Denial was always the first step, even more so in such an unbelievable context, but keeping calm was a habit I had practiced religiously.

This may be a dream, but I still have to deal with it. Maybe I'll laugh when I wake up, but before that, I'll roll with it.

Was I taking things well? I wasn't a shrieking wreck, but neither was I completely on the ball. In fact, everything had a slightly fuzzy edge. Of course, I was still skeptical, which probably made up the core of my calm, but some doubt had pervaded and was taking tiny bites out of that calm. It felt like Cthulu. Or some other eldritch abomination.

"Okay. So. What did you want from me?" I croaked again, voice wavering slightly.

"Didn't I just say? You're to replace Sawada Tsunayoshi." Cheshire was beginning to sound irritated. I briefly entertained the thought of snapping back, but caution stayed my tongue.

"In what context? Like. Am I going to replace him as a whole, removing the person Sawada Tsunayoshi and putting '…' in his place? Or Sawada Tsunayoshi still exists and I'm taking his name?"

I guess the unstupid questions mollified Cheshire, for he answered more evenly, "You'll be taking over his body, so you'll be taking his name too."

And obviously, the next question to ask would be,

"Why?"

"Suffice to say the details are not important. The gist of the matter is that Sawada Tsunayoshi, the future Vongola Decimo, has died and thus a replacement is required because of the importance of his existence in his world. As physical transfers are messy and generally cause even more chaos, it was decided that a soul transfer would be done."

The question after that was obvious too,

"Why me?"

"You are the only person bearing a Sky Flame of a high enough concentration within the closest 15,000,864 worlds who also has no particular importance to the fate of your world."

…

Curiosity won over caution. That, and I usually find that keeping focus helps me keep in control and thus, calm.

"What makes you think that I will succeed in replacing him? And are you serious? I have Sky Flames? I would have thought that Mist flames or Rain flames would be closer to my personality."

"Wrong. Your personality is actually closer to Cloud flames in your indifference to the fate of others. However, your will is not strong enough to stand alone, which is why you are not completely secluded despite wishing to be."

…

Oblivious to, or intentionally ignoring, my sudden identity crisis, Cheshire continued in the snooty monotone he had taken on.

"You have some cunning, however you are not nearly devious enough for the Mist flame, and while you keep your calm, it is not something that occurs to you naturally. Sun flames are the complete opposite of your personality, seeing as they require you to care greatly for others and wish to support them. Lightning would require the courage and willingness to be hurt for the sake of others and you are not destructive enough for the Storm flame."

I'm glad not to be devious or destructive, but that description makes me more sad than happy.

"The reason for you possessing the Sky flames is because you possess insight. Hardly on the level of the Vongola hyper-intuition, and most of it is due to your obsessive habit of watching people and observing their actions, however some of it is from the innate talent that is essential to those bearing the Sky flame. You are also open-minded."

…Do you have to make everything sound like a bad thing?

"The truth is that there were several other viable candidates who were a better fit to replace Sawada Tsunayoshi in terms of personality. I, myself, objected to you as your aloof nature has interfered with the natural charisma of your Sky Flames and resulted in you being a loner almost to the point of isolation. This coupled with your resulting poor social and communication skills would make it even more difficult to gather the Guardians and lead the Vongola. And lastly, your morbid and slightly bloodthirsty personality which you have managed to avoid showing due to your solitary nature could potentially cause Vongola to go down the path of bloodshed."

…

"That last bit is the least important as it is inconsequential to the fate of the world. However, I personally would prefer such a thing not to happen—it creates more paperwork. The main concern is you being able to gain the support of the Guardians and becoming Vongola Decimo, thus taking over the responsibility of the Vongola Rings and protecting the world as part of the Trinisette."

…

"In truth," Cheshire continued, ignoring my very flattened expression, "you are an anomaly which is very rarely seen even amongst the million worlds in this current multiverse. A Sky flame user with the personality of a Cloud. Acceptance and indifference. This should be impossible and by all standards, you should possess Cloud flames. However, your need for people who understand you, AKA friends, goes against its core value."

…

"This is also the reason for your lack of impact to the fate of your world." He added matter-of-factly, "Your contradicting characteristics would hinder your development into any person of consequence—In fact, you were slated to live a quiet life with a few close friends and die a quiet death with a funeral attended by only direct relatives and those same friends."

…That was my ideal death but you make it sound so pathetic.

"However, the decision was made because out of the many other candidates, you are the only one who has read the Katekyo Hitman Reborn manga in enough detail to be able to have an idea of what should be done in order to assure the ideal progression."

…Like that would make any difference to what actually happens. If my personality is all wrong for it, then there's no way I could fake anything well enough to actually follow Tsuna's footsteps.

"Precisely my point," Cheshire agreed sourly, "However, there is actually no fixed route by which the Vongola Rings are to come under Sawada Tsunayoshi's protection, and thus as long as they do end up in your possession, what actions you take are yours to make. History has shown that as long as you progress with the intention towards a certain end, it is most likely that you would achieve it."

That doesn't actually help my case. By telling any other soul that their goal is to become Vongola Decimo, would that not give them the "end" that they would strive towards?

"That's actually too abstract a goal," he replied glumly, "you need to know the required 'achievements' in order to reach such a long-term one."

…Do I?

I had a feeling that he had rolled his eyes at me. "You've read the manga as fanatically as any otaku and I'm sure that you have some understanding of it beyond the surface—you do bear the Sky Flame after all."

With all your griping over my substandard "Sky" personality, I'd have thought that such a thing would be beyond me. I thought dryly, ignoring the otaku remark.

"Oh for—are you so insecure that you need me to reassure you of your strengths? I did say that you were one of the few who had the required concentration of Sky flames, did I not?"

I crossed my arms, Concentration does not equate to purity. And if I'm not wrong, it is purity that presides over the strength of a flame.

"…That is correct," came the exasperated reply, "Why can't mortals just accept things? Skepticism. Bah. Purity comes from resolve and resolve is not something necessarily accessible at all times. As in the case of Sawada Tsunayoshi himself. In addition, a higher purity may draw out more powers of a flame, however, that does not mean that they do not already exist."

…So the amount of flame one has is predetermined by personality or compatibility—the 'wave energy' emitted, but its purity is based on circumstance…

"One can train to increase the capacity of one's flames, however, that is essentially correct."

I shook my head to clear it and sighed gustily. It was a bad habit, getting angry when mystified, and while I usually kept myself in check, this was not a usual situation. Tapping my arm, I sorted through the information dump. The situation was unreal but I wasn't going anywhere (I batted at Cthulu determinedly) so I may as well find out as much as I could.

So what is the deal? You mentioned a deal in the beginning, though you said that replacing Tsuna was compulsory.

"Basically, if you agree to strive towards the goal of becoming Vongola Decimo, we shall ease your departure from your world and sooth the souls of your loved ones."

My mouth fell open.

…That's not a deal. That's a bloody lousy consolation package…

He muttered something about "insight" and "bloody focused female" and "told them it wouldn't throw her off enough", before clearing his throat, "the truth is… you don't really have a choice whether or not to do as told. There are higher powers at work here and matters of greater importance than your own individual fate."

"However," he added hastily at the darkening look on my face, "we do sympathize with you and thus would like to ease your transition as much as possible and allow you to leave with as few regrets as possible."

He cleared his throat uncomfortably, "And… while you were not a figure of importance to the fate of the world, you had—have the ability to create strong bonds with people who were. The friends you made in life will go on to become great and shape the future, and while you would never be in the limelight, you played a part in their growth."

This was becoming a little too close for comfort. There was too much (accurate!) introspection for this to be a normal dream and I was becoming slightly concerned.

I looked down.

It was obvious that Cheshire was not used to giving out praise. He sounded as if he would rather swallow iron nails as he spoke, "While it is true that you are aloof, you give freely to the ones close to your heart. Your friends will possibly never be as great as they could have been with you by their side."

I continued to stare at my feet, though my lips quirked wryly.

Cheshire had made it sound as if my 'ability' had been something that came easily to me when in fact, it had been the opposite. In accordance to his description, I was a very reserved person and it was very difficult for me to strike up a conversation with anyone.

What friends I had made and kept were through painstaking effort and many many repeated attempts despite great disappointment, embarrassment, pain and sadness. I had been stabbed in the back, abandoned in favor of popularity, made a fool of by pretenders… and of course, lost friends through diverging paths and lack of contact. It was only through continued perseverance that I found the friends I could trust in.

Of course I would not want to leave them behind.

As for my family… the way he had said it gave the impression of a distant one. It was the opposite. My direct family was extremely close to each other and always helped in times of need. It was something that was a given—we would never abandon one another and even if I had never made a single friend, I knew that I could always count on their support.

Of course I would not want to leave them behind.

I cleared my throat again uncomfortably. Cheshire's voice had been serious…and in the teeniest chance that this was real, I had to take it seriously as well. So I gave the 'deal' some serious thought.

I just hadn't realized how incensed I would be when I did.

It was completely unfair—me being displaced from my place in my world in order to fill a role that I had not even asked for. I had been happy. I had been content. And now I was being ripped from the niche I had carved out of blood and sweat to ensure a fate that I couldn't care less about.

And I didn't have a fucking choice.

It was that that decided it for me really—or was it that the decision had already been made for me? There was nothing I could do and while I was still of the opinion that it was just a dream and I would wake up in my bed again, I wasn't going to waste time floundering. I ground my teeth.

"Okay." I took a deep breath, "Okay. Fine—you got me. I'll do it," I said, the words leaving a bitter taste in my mouth. "But," I thrust a finger in front of me, "you have to promise me—swear it—that my family and friends will be taken cared of—that even without me they will be the happiest they can be and live well. I don't give a damn if they can't be as 'great' as they possibly could without me. Make them be. I want a goddamn guarantee."

That distant calm had all but dissipated. Cheshire had me pegged—I treasured the people I cared for and would do anything for them. IF, for some kind of warped reason, if this was real, and I truly was going to be plucked out of my world and stuffed into another, I wasn't going to miss the chance to strike the bargain as much to my(their) favor as possible.

"Done," the answer came immediately—eagerly even. My anger abated slightly at the evidence of his sincerity. I hated that I paid such close attention to distinguish the nuances in his tone—he had not been the person behind my unfortunate situation, and he was truly sympathetic despite his less-than-amiable disposition. It was a lose-lose case for the both of us—him for getting the candidate he did not approve of, and me for being the candidate.

What a shitty hand fate had dealt the both of us. I was regretted it immediately, but I cursed Tsuna for dying.

My lips quirked up a little, but it was bitter. Fate couldn't save itself by preventing Tsuna's death, but it could reach through millions of worlds to drag an unwilling replacement in order to.

What a fucking contradiction.

Sensing that that I had no more requests, Cheshire began to speak once more in a calmer tone, "We will be fitting you into the body of Sawada Tsunayoshi, age 5, and also provide you with the basic understanding of the Japanese language. One additional unintended boon you will gain is also the increase in purity of your flames." He carried before I opened my mouth, "It is true that resolve is one of the main factors of a Dying Will flame's purity, however, as the name of it implies, it is affected by Death. I am sure you can figure it out yourself, but here's a clue: it has to do with how it is triggered. That said, you can ponder it while you adjust."

Before I could get another word in edgewise, a sound like the sucking of a vacuum roared in my ears and the world spun.

And there we have it. I'm not very happy with how cliche the entrance was, but that wasn't the main point anyway. Everyone wants to know what would happen if the main character were a little more astute, more tough, more badarsed. And well, compared to canon-Tsuna, I'm pretty sure anyone'd be a better person. But hey, can't blame the mangaka for wanting to have some character that needs development.

In any case, I'm putting something like myself in here, hence the titled SELF-insert instead of OC, but it'd probably be a juiced-up version since I'm never going to be able to describe myself in too flawed a manner. I'll avoid Mary-Sue judiciously, so hopefully things will go well. Another thing, writing a male character will be a bitch to my brain. My very tired and overworked brain. Sigh. This will be more of a side to Adoption, unless I get more interested and then there may be a flip, but for now, Adoption is my baby. I wrote something like 5 chapters of this though, so my readers will have something to tide them over as I try to wrack my brains over the next chapter.

Enjoy~

Memory25