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Jan Di leaned forward with her arms wrapped around her waist, as if that could stem the flow of emotions charging through her. A sound manages to escape her and she bites down hard enough to draw blood in her effort to hold that in as well. She would have to figure out how she was going to-
His voice penetrated her thoughts with his obvious solution, "Jan Di, I think we should get married."
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***Flashback to three and a half months earlier***
"Jun Pyo! Let's go play!" "Let's have a picnic!"
…..
"I like you. Even though I've tried to erase the feeling, I can't. It's to the point where I'm just frustrated." With this Jan Di pulls him closer and kisses him eagerly.
…..
"Jun Pyo, stop the car."
"Today was my last day with you."
***End Flashback***
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"What?!" Her voice strangled on the word.
"It's what I can do. For all you," He said the words solemnly as he folded his body to kneel in front of her.
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***Flashback to two months earlier***
Jan Di walked through the school quad with her eyes focused on the ground in front of her, not noticing the excited whispers and giggles following in her wake. She came to a stop when she sees a familiar shadow in her path. Looking up she gives a weak smile, "Sunbae…"
"Jun Pyo woke up," Ji Hoo gave her the good news and then moved aside so she could see Yi Jung and Woo Bin grinning at her from where they waited by their cars.
Jan Di's heart skipped a beat and then started pounding rapidly. She started feeling lightheaded, but was grounded when Ji Hoo grabbed her hands and squeezed them firmly.
…..
"Do you really not know who Geum Jan Di is?"
"Ji Hoo, is she your girl?"
He didn't remember her. Jan Di met the shocked stares of the men standing across from her as Jun Hee rushed from the room screaming for a doctor.
***End Flashback***
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"I can't let you sacrifice make this sacrifice," Jan Di protested firmly.
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***Flashback to two weeks earlier***
"Don't come back. Whenever I see you, my mood turns sour. You get on my nerves."
Jan Di felt her heart break again and she replies before rushing from his room. Running down the stairs she crashes into Ji Hoo who tried to convince her to stay and fight for Jun Pyo.
…..
"I refuse to accept that you two will break up over something as nonsensical as this. I can't accept it."
"It's not because of Yu Mi, it's …. ultimately… Goo Jun Pyo and Geum Jan Di... this is what they amounted to."
***End Flashback***
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Tenderly his wiped the tears from her checks, a useless gesture since they had not stopped silently streaming as she made her confession. "It would be my honor, not a sacrifice."
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***Flashback to earlier this evening***
Jan Di felt sick as she listened to Yu Mi announce that she and Jun Pyo would be leaving for America. She heard the murmurs of Yi Jung and Woo Bin, disgusted with the lies and manipulations of the girl. Ji Hoo placed an arm protectively around her shoulders before leading her to the spot she had been only a few shorts minutes past. He murmured that he would get her some water and to wait for him.
A couple minutes later she sensed him and turned to see Jun Pyo walking towards her. When he faltered and started to turn around to go back the way he came, she knows he has noticed her too.
…
Jan Di had already tossed her necklace into the water and was making an impassioned attempt to get Jun Pyo to remember their love.
"No. You do know how to swim. You don't fear anything in the world, but you're so scared of bugs, you shake. You the idiot who would rather his ribs all bust apart than see one finger on his woman hurt. You're the idiot who doesn't know the difference between "privacy" and "pride", who insists like a train that swallowed its heart that the 38th Strategy is running away. You freak out when it comes to kids, but... you want to be a devoted father... who will go out and look at the stars with his son. You're a lonely but loving guy."
"Who do you think you are?" Though he tries for furious, the words came out more shaken than not.
"You call it out. Call out my name!" Jan Di pleaded and took a step back.
She stopped moving when she remembered and focused on him, neither noticing when the F4 and Yu Mi came to stand by them.
Not a word was said, it was as if time stopped moving. Countless minutes later Jan Di's shoulders slumped and she looked at her friends watching them. She gave a short shake her head, squared her shoulders and marched determinedly to Jun Pyo. When she reached him, she pulled on his tie to yank his head down, letting go only after she whispered something to him. Pulling away, she gives him a quick look but she didn't want to wait around to see what reaction he might have. Jan Di inhaled deeply before she walked to Ji Hoo, asking softly, "Can you take me home now?" He nodded and offered his arm for her to hold on to but his own gaze focused on Jun Pyo's shocked face. Glancing between the two, he escorted Jan Di out, when he looked back one last time he met Woo Bin's curious eyes and nodded briefly to Jun Pyo. Woo Bin needed no further communication; he knows what Ji Hoo was asking.
…
By the time they reached the front of the mansion Ji Hoo's chauffeured limo is ready, Ji Hoo helped Jan Di in before sliding in after her. Once he was settled he could see that Jan Di was trembling. She looked up at him with wild eyes that were stricken with grief.
Worried Ji Hoo gathered her in his arms before instructing the driver to take them to his home.
***End Flashback***
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.
One Hour Earlier
Jun Pyo was still, he had been ever since that weed girl whispered to him, unsure of what to make of her confession. Concerned, Woo Bin and Yi Jung sat down to watch over him and wait for him to be ready to talk. Yu Mi hovered close to Jun Pyo twisting her fingers together nervously.
All three were startled when Jun Pyo suddenly dived into the pool where he floundered for around for a short time, but his friends stayed by the poolside where they had rushed at his sudden movement. They were willing to let him try to regain his memories this way. He now knew how to swim; muscle memory might be what he needed to remember what he had forgotten.
Because the lack of movement from Jun Pyo, Woo Bin felt a growing concern but as he started to toe off his shoes, Jun Pyo started swimming hesitantly. Sighing in relief Yi Jung said, "It's coming back to him. "
Jun Pyo swam to the bottom of the pool then came back to the side where his friends were waiting. They each put a hand out and helped him out of the pool. He stayed on the ground, breathing heavily, staring at his clenched fist. Without looking up he asked, "Since when do I know how to swim?"
"Since you took lessons," Woo Bin answered, hesitant to go into detail. He was worried that unloading on him could cause numerous setbacks to Jun Pyo's health.
Jun Pyo looked up, "But why?"
"Because you would rather risk drowning then let some other guy save your girl," Yi Jung whispered softly.
Yu Mi made a suffocated sound and Jun Pyo looked at her intently before slowing saying, "So I learned so I could protect Yu-"
Before he could finish her name, Yi Jung interrupted with a short laugh. "No."
Jun Pyo persisted, "But you said I learned for my girl and-"
"And Yu Mi has never been your girl," Yi Jung finished, tired of the girl's manipulations and his friend's ability to ignore the obvious. "Jun Pyo! Why can't you remember that you met her in the hospital?"
Jun Pyo looked at Yu Mi, who was looking at her feet, face pale. "But she was just pretending because she didn't want to overwhelm me with the truth."
"She lies," Yi Jung said flatly before pivoting to grab the girl and pull her closer. "She took advantage of your situation and lied."
"But why wouldn't you tell me the truth sooner?" Jun Pyo grounds out, confused.
"Your doctor recommended that we let the memories come back naturally."
"Jun Pyo," Woo Bin cut in, "We never thought that it would take you this long to remember Ge-,.. to regain your memories. And we never thought that this…. this woman… would lie to you about a relationship. "
Jun Pyo looked at Yu Mi, whose cries were getting louder. She looked and met his eyes before throwing herself next to him on the cement. She begged him to forgive her, to remember that he now loved her.
Jun Pyo looked at her coldly. "I don't love you, I don't like you. I feel nothing for you. Nevertheless, if I have to gaze upon you for even one more minute I will destroy your world. Leave. Now."
The three men watched dispassionately as she ran away crying brokenly, none of them were able to feel sympathy. Her manipulations had worsened an already bad situation.
When his friends looked back, they saw that Jun Pyo was staring at something cupped in his palm. Moving closer they saw it was the necklace he had given to Geum Jan Di.
Jun Pyo ran his thumb over the inscription, voice unsure and questioning, "These letters… they stand for Jan Di and Ji Hoo, don't they?" He was looking down and missed the conflicted stare that his friends shared.
"No."
Jun Pyo glanced up sharply at Yi Jung's reply, "Then who?"
"Jan Di and… Jun Pyo," Woo Bin kneeled down as he replied and said what Jun Pyo was already suspecting. He leaned closer and heard Jun Pyo whisper to himself.
"Than what she said…. It was the truth?"
Ji Hoo carried Jan Di into his house and rushed to his private sitting room. Setting her down gently he grabbed one of the blankets folded on the armchair and wrapped it around her. Quickly going to the phone he started to dial his private physician to tend to her, but stopped when he heard Jan Di whisper, "I'm okay."
Ji Hoo turned back to her see her sitting up, looking like a broken princess in her pink dresses and pale face. The trembling had subsided a little, but she still worried him.
Deciding to let her have her way, for now, he moved back to settle next to her on the couch. Immediately she shifted closer to his warmth, snuggling in when he set an arm around her. Feeling secure in his arms Jan Di closes her eyes, wiling her jumping nerves to settle. She knew that Ji Hoo sunbae would let her take as much time as she needed to.
He thought she was sleeping, her head a long since settled against him and she had stopped fidgeting. Therefore, he was taken aback when she started talking.
"I'm going to leave Seoul," she confided to him.
His heart clenched and his arms tightened in reflex.
"I've thought about it a lot for the last week and tonight I came to the conclusion that it is the only thing left for me to do."
"Why?"
"I can't be here anymore with Jun Pyo not knowing who I am. It's best if I start over."
Not believing that, he repeated, "Why?"
"Sunbae! I just need-"
Ji Hoo shifted so he was no longer holding her in his arms; he was now sitting on the table in front of the couch and kept his eyes on her. "Jan Di, you don't give up, you would never give up. So why are you doing this?"
Jan Di couldn't maintain eye contact and looked down. Following her heart, she decided to tell him the truth. Since she had impulsively told Jun Pyo, she didn't know how he would react or whom he would tell. Knowing that Ji Hoo would always be on her side helped her overcome the shame she felt while she faced having to admit her fall from grace.
"My mother kicked me out."
At that, Ji Hoo felt his eyes widen with shock, even more so as Jan Di softly continued. Tears filled her eyes until they overflowed and started heartbreakingly tracking down her checks.
"You see, it was the thought of having an unmarried, pregnant daughter living with her."
Ji Hoo's hands twitched around hers but that was the only sign he gave that he heard her whispered confession.
Jan Di glanced up to peek at Ji Hoo sunbae, but there was no judgment or condemnation in eyes, just simple concern.
"Aren't you going to ask me who the father is?"
Ji Hoo moved his hands over her icy ones, trying to give her some of his warmth. "I already know Jan Di. I know what kind of person you are, I know who you are, and I know whatever you did it wasn't done lightly or recklessly."
Jan Di shook her head. "It was reckless," she cried out. She went on to explain how during their last day together things had progressed further than she had meant to. She had wanted at least one memory for both of them if she was never going to see him again. "But I was so careless and stupid," she cried out. She continued to tell him how she had went to the doctor the week before, something had been off for weeks but she had dismissed it as the stress of the situation they were all going through.
"When I found out… well I went home and told my mom. She was so mad. It only got worse when I refused to go straight to Jun Pyo and get him to marry me." Jan Di let out a bitter laugh. "Marry me? He can't even stand looking at me." Voice breaking on the last word she took another deep breath. "When I hesitated on doing what she wanted, my mom questioned if I even knew who the father was; if it wasn't Jun Pyo we couldn't risk refocusing his mother's attention on us. I was to go live with my great aunt and come back after the baby was born."
Jan Di stayed silent as tears coursed over her cheeks, before continuing. "But I can't do that! It's my baby, Ji Hoo sunbae. How can I give that up? My child. I made one last effort tonight to get Jun Pyo to remember, but he didn't. I was even going to fling myself into the pool so he would be forced to remember learning how to swim and remember why he learned. Right before I stepped back I remembered the baby and stopped myself."
Glancing at Ji Hoo she pulled her hands away and used them to scrub at her face. "I told him I was having his child and he just stood there! He didn't even try to come after us. I cannot do this anymore sunbae, I have more than myself to think of now. It is not good for my child to be in the middle of this turmoil. I can't give up my baby and I can't fight for Jun Pyo."
She repeated decisively, "I can't. So I need to leave. I will find a quiet place to live and raise my child."
Ji Hoo stayed silent sitting on the table in front of her before easily coming to a decision.
Jan Di leaned forward with her arms wrapped around her waist, as if that could stem the flow of emotions charging through her. A sound manages to escape her and she bites down hard enough to draw blood in her effort to hold that in as well. She would have to figure out how she was going to-
His voice penetrated her thoughts with his obvious solution, "Jan Di, I think we should get married."
"What?!" Her voice strangled on the word.
"It's what I can do. For all you," He said the words solemnly as he folded his body to kneel in front of her.
"I can't let you sacrifice make this sacrifice," Jan Di protested firmly.
Tenderly his wiped the tears from her checks, a useless gesture since they had not stopped silently streaming as she made her confession. "It would be my honor, not a sacrifice."
Framing her face with his hands, he met her gaze, "say yes."
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Thank you for taking time to read and review:)
Disclaimer: I do not own Boys Before Flowers or Hana Yori Dango
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