Yo! So, a story of mine was sadly eaten by some corrupt data that got into my flashdrive, so now...I'm publishing this horribly cheesy OkiKagu story in my mourning.

This is my first crack at the 3Z universe, so I hope it's okay. Anyways, enjoy!

Disclaimer: I don't own Gintama

Kagura sighed as she leaned back into her boyfriend, his chin rested on her shoulder. "Sadist…I can stand you know." One arm was around her waist, the other was casually on her thigh.

"This is a crowded bus China, don't you watch hentais?" Okita mumbled into her neck, licking it.

Suppressing a moan, she tried to stand up due to the stares they were receiving. "That's trains, sadist! And you're the one whose molesting me!"

"I'm your boyfriend, it's legal." He replied, sliding his hand up her skirt a little more.

Swatting his hand away, Kagura replied. "It's not legal if I say 'no'."

"Come on China…would you really want to stand up in this overcrowded box-shaped automobile? Or sit comfortably in your loving fiancee's lap?" She could feel his smirk as he tightened his grip around her waist.

"I didn't say I was moving, but you're not the only one enjoying this Sadist." She leaned back into his embrace completely.

Frowning at her reply, he looked up to see a boy who looked several years older than them; he was wearing glasses and was overweight, and seemed to be wearing a university school uniform. He was blushing and drooling at the bit of Kagura's exposed thigh. Okita growled, and pulled the skirt as low as it could go. The fat boy pouted and looked up to see, demonic red eyes trying to devour his soul. Flinching, he pulled the stopping-lever and exited the vehicle as soon as he could.

"Why didn't you tell me sooner?" Okita clenched his teeth.

"You were too into yourself, to notice…I thought it'd be funny." Kagura said, closing her eyes. "Ne Sadist…you got your sleep mask?"

"Why should I give it you? You don't deserve to sleep." Sougo snorted, but got the mask out of his pocket anyways.

"Cause you love me." Kagura snatched the mask and put over her eyes; she won this round.

At School

"Souchiro-kun…Kagura-chan…care to explain to us why you're late?" Ginpachi-sensei looked at the lat arrivals in disdain. Their hair was messed up, drool marks were still on their lips, and their clothes were frumpy; he and the class assumed the x-rated path the two of them took before school.

"It's Sougo, sensei. And blame China, she made us fall asleep on the bus." Sougo deadpanned and dodged a punch from the orange-haired beauty. The class sighed as their x-rated prediction had not come true.

"Stupid sadist! You're the one who forced me to sit in your lap!" Kagura accused, throwing a punch at him.

And their suspicions were back again; Ginpachi sighed and pulled them apart from each other. "Okay, okay, we get it…as punishment you two sit in different seat from each other." The couple froze at the man's words, as did the rest of the class. Now it was well-known in the school that Sougo and Kagura were an item, and you didn't under any circumstances try to separate them. It was also well-known that they have been best friends since early childhood, and that Okita was a malicious genius. When they entered Middle School, Okita had lobbied for an arranged marriage with Kagura between their respective fathers, and due to the fact Okita's father knew his son wouldn't accept anything else, he agreed. Umibozu didn't like it certainly, but he had different woes concerning his son and his girlfriend, so he promised to challenge Sougo when they were of legal marriage age.

They have been together ever since, and rarely parted after that. Several teachers and twenty-odd students had left the school for making the mistake of trying to separate them, or flirt with one or the other. Ginpachi-sensei and several other students were the only ones that have managed to do this impossible task without dying or being sent to an insane asylum. Only he, Hijikata, Kondo, Otae and her group of friends, and Principal Otose have successfully pried them apart.

"Sensei…you know what you just said, right?" Sougo glared.

"Yes I do, think about it for next time." He shoved them off to their temporary seat. "Okay Kagura-chan, you sit by Sarutobi and Souchiro-kun, you sit by Hijikata." Glaring, both did as they were told. Kagura didn't mind the silver-haired masochist, but her obsession with her sensei was just creepy. In contrast to her boyfriend, Kagura didn't really mind being seated differently, but she knew she would have to calm down a fit of his later. Sougo on the other hand, loathed Hijikata; that chain-smoking, mayo-obsessed bastard had done something unforgivable- stealing his sister's heart. It was going to be hard trying to kill him with a lesson going on; damn that sensei of his!

"Now before I begin the lesson or whatever, I have an announcement to make: a new student or something's going to come in. He's rich or something, so be nice to him so I can get my bonus." He ordered, he tapped the sliding door with his folder. "Oi, come in."

The door slammed in, and in stepped two men in black suits and stood on either of side of the other. After them, stepped in a boy with pale skin, blue eyes, and long black hair in a ponytail; he carried a briefcase and wore a standard Gintama High uniform. Most of the girls blushed at his obvious wealth and his bishounen-like appearance, while most guys just acknowledged him indifferently.

The new boy smiled at the class and bowed politely. "Hello, my name is Hontachi Mezuroni, pleased to make all of your acquaintances."

"He's hot!"

"Yay! Another bishounen!"

"We won't have to worry about pissing off Yato anymore!"

As the girls murmured, Mezuroni glanced around the room and his eyes landed on a girl with stunning orange hair. Her head was and her face was resting in her hands on her desk, obviously trying to block out the commotion to go to sleep. She had Chinese buns in her hair, making him wonder if she was from the country west of them.

Sougo noticed his stare and clenched his fists when noted it was in Kagura's direction. 'What does that little fucker think he's staring at?'

"Yosh! Mezuroni, take a seat next to…" Ginpachi sent a smirk to Sougo's direction. "Kagura-chan…she's the girl in the orange hair."

"Thank you very much, sensei." The black haired boy bowed, and his body guards went to stand on either back corner of the classroom. Hontachi walked over to the girl, and took the seat to her left, unknowingly, blocking Sougo's view of her. Hontachi's smile widened when Kagura finally turned to face him, he was momentarily stunned by her blue eyes.

"Uhh…who are you?" She asked with a Chinese accent.

"I am Hontachi Mezuroni, pleasure to meet you." He gave a charming smile to her.

Kagura just rotated her face back down again, and gave a casual hand wave. "Yeah, yeah…nice to meet yah, uh-huh!"

"Y-yes…" Hontachi sweat-dropped at her lack of reaction, rather disappointed.

After the lesson

Hontachi wasted no time as he finally had his chance. "Excuse me, Kagura-san…would it be too much trouble to show me the school?"

"Zzzz…wha?!" Kagura's head shot up suddenly, and she looked around herself. "Oh…who are you? Is the lesson over? What day is it?"

"I'm Hontachi Mezuroni…you slept through the whole lesson, and it is Tuesday." He sweatdropped again. "And I was asking you for a guided tour of the school."

"Huh? Ask one of the drooling pigs behind you." Kagura pointed to the stary-eyed girls a few feet in front of the classroom.

"Yes, but...I was hoping it would be you." Hontachi insisted politely.

"You got a death wish or something?" Kagura rose a brow at the boy's boldness.

"Er…why do you say that?" Hontachi was now confused.

"Because…no one's been stupid enough to hit on her in years." A voice said from behind him. Hontachi turned around and suppressed a gasp, for in front of him he was sure was a demon. This boy was a bishounen like him, but had short sandy-hair and wine-red eyes. The boy shoved him back slightly, causing the two bodyguards to run up to them. Kagura stood up and was immediatly at Sougo's side. But before a fight broke out with tazers, Ginpachi intervened by putting a peechee folder between the angry sadist and the bodyguards.

"That's enough, what's going on here?" Ginpachi asked.

"I was asking Kagura-san if she would give me a tour of the school during lunch hour, but then this delinquent tried to hit me." Hontachi pointed an accusatory finger at Okita.

"It's your fault for trying to touch someone's property, little boy." Sougo scoffed.

"Property?! Sadist!" Kagura stood up in offense.

"Yes China…you are my property, and I'm simply telling this clueless bastard what's what." Sougo wrapped his arms around her waist.

"Okita-san…Kagura-san is perfectly capable of making her own decisions, and does not need you to dictate her." The new boy pushed his glasses up slightly.

"Why you-" Sougo suddenly let go of Kagura, and was about to punch the creep, but Ginpachi caught the fist.

"That's enough, Kagura show him around." The teacher ordered.

"But sensei…" She pouted, she was going to exchange bentos with Sougo like they always did.

"No buts, consider it the rest of your punishment, now go. And Souchiro, shake-out the erasers." He shooed her away.

"Yes sensei…" She grumbled and stood up; noticing her boyfriend was barely concealing his rage, and the new boy clearly had a victory-smirk going, she applied her own remedy. She tip-toed up and gave Sougo a searing kiss. He blinked in surprise as she lowered herself back down. "Later!" She winked and lead the crestfallen rich boy and his two guards out of the classroom.

Sougo touched his lips and allowed a relieved smile to come to his lips. Ginpachi inwardly vomited at the mushy scene. "See? Why do you keep worrying about her?"

Sougo frowned, thinking back to his childhood and shrugged. It wasn't that he worried about her cheating or being forced into a compromising position…he…simply liked knowing he was the one securing her. He had been that way since middle school, forcing his own father to allow him to marry Kagura, and made Umibozu almost cry himself in shame. Okita smirked at the memories...nothing could stop him from being with Kagura.

With Kagura and Hontachi

"So Kagura-san…how long have you and Okita-san been dating?" Hontachi asked as politely as he could; his body guards were walking slightly behind them.

"Since Middle School, so…" She counted the years in her head. "Five years I guess."

"That's quite a long time for an adolescent romance." The boy commented. He was hoping that it was a short-term thing or they had just recently started dating, but that didn't seem to be the case. Frowning, he asked another question. "How did you two meet?"

"Beetle brawl." Kagura said bluntly, chewing on some Sunboku. She was hungry but wasn't going to share her lunch with the pale boy.

"Excuse me?" Hontachi sweat-dropped at the foreign term.

"Beetle brawl; we met before elementary school. He had out his demon beetle while I had out my Sadaharu No. 28, but the damned bastard killed it somehow and I swore revenge. We were rivals ever since then, and then we were brawling in the sixth grade one day and…" She tried to recall exactly what lead to the kiss but couldn't for some reason. "I don't know…guess it happened like in those corny Shoujo's, uh-huh! He fell on me and we kissed, and instead of yelling rape, I just went with it."

Spying a weakness, the rich boy inquired. "So he literally stole your first kiss? How impudent of him."

"It wasn't like I stopped him." Kagura frowned at the implication. "I was disgusted at first sure, but…it felt kind of good. Sadist is weird like that; he's able to make you feel happy but enraged at the same time, uh-huh!"

"So even back then, you had feelings for him?" Hontachi sighed, sensing defeat.

"The Sadist and I have always been rivals, and that's not going to change regardless of what kind of relationship we're in. So as long as our rivalry is alive, our love-thing will remain, uh-huh!" Kagura explained cheerfully, and rubbed her growling stomach. "I got to go; I want to eat lunch before next period!" Before she could run away, Hontachi grabbed her wrist to prevent her from running. "Wait!"

"Let go, asshole." Kagura glared and yanked her arm away. "I've almost wasted my entire lunch break cause of you and I want to have lunch with the Sadist!"

"Oh I apologize then, how about I join you and Okita-san for lunch?" Hontachi gave a charming smile, grabbing her arm again.

"No, lunch time is just for me and the Sadist, no weird new OCs allowed." Kagura scoffed.

"Oh, but I insist-"

"Oi! OC-san, you heard her right? No intruders allowed." Both turned to see Sougo standing a few feet from them; the sadist glared at the hand around his girlfriend's arm. "Remove your disgusting appendages before I cut them off her."

Frowning, Hontachi removed his fingers from Kagura. Just seeing her go to his side without even glancing to say goodbye, told Hontachi enough. "I see…well have a good day Okita-san, Kagura-san, I think I will get someone else to give me a more appropriate tour."

"You're one to talk, you perverted shut-in." Sougo wrapped an arm around Kagura's waist, and started leading them away. "Also, stay away from MY woman."

"I'm no one's woman sadist!" Kagura yelled.

"Really, China…guess I'll have to teach you otherwise tonight then?" Sougo said nonchalantly, leading them further away from the black-haired boy.

"Tch…imbeciles…!" The rich prick considered going to different schools.

With Okita and Kagura

They were in their usual spot on the roof, Sougo's head was resting on Kagura's lap, ignoring the crumbling over his face from the sushi. Kagura ate her bento with her usual vigor, but Sougo had completely lost his appetite. Noticing that her boyfriend wasn't eating the bento she made him, she paused in her eating and poked his eye with her chopstick.

"Ouch…China…watch it…I'm trying to go to sleep." He shifted himself so his face was pressing against her stomach. He inhaled her scent, and tried to calm himself down.

"You planning to skip today?" She asked, already sensing this would be the case.

"Do you really have to ask, China?" He scoffed.

"At least eat your lunch, be grateful that your pretty girlfriend made it, uh-huh!" Kagura ordered.

"I'd be happier if parasites didn't try to spread disease to her." The boy huffed.

"Sadist…" Putting down her bento, she pat his head lightly. "Remember how we started this whole habit of trading lunches? We started trading lunches because we kept comparing our food-stuffs. We kept arguing about which one was better, and we'd end up eating eachother's, uh-huh!"

"What's your point, China?" The boy growled.

"My point is, I've grown to like your spicy cooking, uh-huh! So I want to only continue switching lunches with you!" Kagura pulled something out of her skirt-pocket.

Sitting up, Sougo looked at Kagura in the eye. "China…"

Smiling, she put the eye-mask over her boyfriend's head and leaned in close. "So don't worry, no matter how rich some other lunches may be, I'll always want Sadist's cheap spicy hot-sauce, uh-huh!"

"China…"Sougo pulled her in for a searing kiss, and eventually knocked them both down. They made out for several minutes, and broke apart as the bell rang. Smirking, he put his chin over head and held her close to him under the security of the shade. "…Let's skip today."

"Stupid Sadist, we already agreed on that." She snuggled into his chest, and yawned. "Night Sadist…love you…"

Putting on a genuine smile, Sougo kissed her head. "Love you too."

Review please! I know it's cheesy, but I'm in mourning over a murdered story of mine! In all seriousness, I hope you guys liked it.