Nick and Jess were sitting up in her bed. She was on the side closest to the door and had positioned her tea and papers on the table next to her. Nick was on what had quickly become "his" side of the bed, watching a movie on his laptop. She put down the assignment she was grading and rested her head on his shoulder. He removed his headphones and smiled.

"Hey. Bored with their writing already?"

She laughed. "Well, no zombie stories yet, so what do you expect?"

"Anything exciting?"

She rolled her eyes and handed him the paper in her hand. He scanned it quickly, his expression going from curious to a series of eye rolls. He handed it back to her. "That's um..."

"Really, really awful." She made a face and started laughing. "I feel kind of bad laughing though, because he's clearly trying hard."

"Well, you can't say he doesn't use descriptive words."

"Right. EVERY word." She laughed again and shook her head. She sighed and put her head back on his shoulder, grabbing his left hand with her right. "I love teaching, but sometimes I wonder if I'm any good at it."

He kissed the top of her head and rested his head on hers. "It's just one student Jess, don't get down on yourself. You're a great teacher."

She sighed again and let go of his hand, reaching for the paper again to continue reading. She shrugged her shoulders, "I guess".

Nick leaned back on the pillow and closed his eyes. After a few minutes of silence, Jess put the paper down again and stared straight ahead. "Hey, so, can I ask you something?"

Nick's didn't move and his eyes remained closed. "Mmmhmm."

"What made you decide to go to Law School?"

Nick remained still. He knew this would probably come up one day, but it seemed so long ago now that he'd almost forgotten about it entirely. What should he say? What DID make him make all the choices he regretted in life? He didn't realize how long he had been thinking to himself and Jess spoke again.

"I'm sorry. You don't have to tell me, it's not important. I know you probably don't want to remember all that."

Nick's eyes shot open and he grabbed her hand. "No, I'm sorry. You can ask, I don't mind." He closed his laptop and slid down a little in the bed, resting his head back on the pillow and staring at the ceiling. Where to begin...

"Honestly, I still wonder why sometimes. I think, well, growing up my dad took advantage of a lot of people, you know? And... I don't know, I just always felt so guilty about it. I guess I thought that maybe being a lawyer, I could somehow make up for all that stuff."

Jess squeezed his hand and flipped over on her side, facing him. She put her right arm up over her on the pillow and rested her head on her hand, watching him as he spoke. He had never opened up to her like this before, and she was mesmerized by the even tone he was using. He continued to stare at the ceiling.

"And then I just, did it, you know? I went to class, kept studying, time passed. It was like, the further I got, the more I figured 'hey I got this far, I should just keep going'. But then"

Jess spoke softly, "Then you realized that you were just doing it to get through, not because you really wanted what was there when you finished."

Nick paused and slowly turned his head towards her. He looked deep into her eyes. That was EXACTLY what happened. How did this woman manage to know him so well? He saw tears forming in her eyes and his expression slowly changed to one of confusion. She lowered her head down, her arm reaching up as she gently played with his hair. She scooted over ever so slightly to rest her head close to his shoulder.

Her voice was barely audible. "I did the same thing with Spencer."

Spencer. She had never really talked about him before. He felt slightly awkward, a little bit enraged hearing his name, but mostly intrigued at the pain he could sense in her voice. There was another period of silence as they both laid there in their own thoughts.

Nick slowly turned on his side and gently placed his hand under her chin, tilting her head up so he could see her eyes. "Jess, you're probably thinking I'm the biggest quitter right? Like, I really DON'T ever finish anything."

She shook her head. "I think you're amazing for knowing when to let something go that didn't make you happy." Nick just stared at her dumbfounded as she continued. "I'm proud of you, Nick. You didn't let other people tell you what to do. You don't make excuses. The rest of the world might see only the grumpiness, but you know what I see?" He slowly shook his head, not taking his eyes from hers. Her voice was barely above a whisper, "A man who just wants to take his time to get it right."

He was suddenly overcome with emotion. No one had ever understood him like this before, never really LISTENED to him. Maybe it was because he had always been too afraid to say it out loud, for fear of being judged. Maybe he had purposely kept it to himself, because if he didn't say it out loud, he could pretend like it never happened. He could pretend that he never made all those decisions that everyone would perceive as wrong, or stupid, or as if he was just a quitter. But Jess was the one who finally understood him. She could see past the surface and understand that even if it seemed wrong to other people, it was the right choice for HIM. As much as he wanted to believe he didn't care what other people thought of him, he would be lying if he said it didn't eat at him sometimes. He had spent so much time building this wall around him. He didn't need anyone to tell him what to do or how to do it. He had spent his whole life taking charge and just getting things done. Sometimes he was happy, but most of the time he just did it because he had to. He had to get his family through a winter with little money for heat, or he had to somehow make up for his dad being such a screw up by being something like a lawyer. A big, bold move to impress people and make them forget about all of his dad's schemes.

"Nick." Her voice was strong, sincere, and full of emotion. "I love you. I love every piece of you, even the parts you think are broken." She smiled. "The best parts of life are the ones when you get to figure out what you want, and we get to do that together. Just promise me you'll always be honest with me. Honest with yourself, okay? Because you deserve to be happy."

Nick smiled and Jess readjusted herself so she was on her stomach. He wrapped his arms around her as she laid her head down on his chest. "Jessica, I've never been this happy OR honest before."

He took a deep breath as he felt Jess relax against him. He was about to tell her about the application, but stopped himself. No. He wanted to wait a few more days, just to see if he had been accepted. He wasn't ready to get her hopes up. Truthfully, since he was enjoying this new honesty with HIMSELF, he didn't want to get his OWN hopes up either. Because at that very moment he realized that he would be crushed if he couldn't make these new dreams he had of their future, a reality.