Just an idea that came to me after reading some How To Train Your Dragon Fanfiction. I couldn't help but notice that there are a fair few where Hiccup is a girl. And so, being me, I just had to write this little skit.

I don't own How To Train Your Dragon, or any of the characters. I do, however, own this piece of work below. (And if you are someone who enjoys writing fem-Hiccup, please don't take this as a personal attack. It's not, it's just a bit of fun.)

I bring to you, "I'm not a girl!"

Once upon a time there was a young girl called Hiccup Horrendous Haddock III

"Whoa, whoa, whoa, what?" Hiccup interrupted, not looking best pleased. "Uh, in case it's escaped your attention; I'm not a girl, I'm a guy."

Tuffnut and Ruffnut snorted in laughter which didn't impress Hiccup at all. "Could've fooled me…" Snotlout derived with a chuckle. Hiccup glared at him, as did the sleek, black dragon which had previously been snoozing behind his best friend and master.

"SILENCE!" a voice boomed from above. Snotlout opened his mouth to reply but was cut off. "THAT INCLUDES YOU, SNORELOUT!" He promptly closed his mouth again. "I AM THE AUTHOR! I CHOOSE WHO IS WHAT GENDER! I HAVE A RIGHT TO MESS AROUND WITH THE CANON!"

"Yeah," Astrid replied, as she walked up to the group whilst giving the sky a hard look. "We know; Fanfiction: unleash your imagination and all that."

"My point," Hiccup said, "is that there have been so many stories where I'm a girl and she's a guy." He jabbed his thumb in Astrid's direction. "It's getting boring."

"I swear if I become Asher one more time…" Astrid muttered threateningly.

"BUT…BUT…" the mysterious voice faltered. "BUT EVERYONE'S DOING IT! IT'S THE IN-THING!"

"So…?" Hiccup questioned.

"Ay'm nowt sayin' tha' Hiccup here's the manliest of lads, bu' doan't ya think tha's a wee bi' 'arsh, makin' 'im a lass," Gobber commented, stepping forward.

An awkward silence followed for the next few seconds before the voice finally said, "UHH…I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT YOU JUST SAID…COME ON, SOMEONE HELP? ROTSNOUT!"

"Snotlout," the dark-haired Viking corrected bluntly.

"GESUNDEIT."

"Whatever…"

"ANYWAY," the voice bellowed, getting back to the topic at hand, "YOU'RE ON MY SIDE, RIGHT? THAT I CAN MAKE HICCUP A GIRL?"

"Hey." Snotlout held his hands up in a surrendering manner and stepped backwards. "I'm staying out of this. This doesn't affect me at all."

"OH, COME ON!"

"You wan' ta do the, uh, 'in thing'," Gobber said, eyebrow arched.

"YEAH…"

"But wouldn't ya like t'be original too?"

"I GUESS…"

"Well then…" Gobber's eyes glinted mischievously and he adopted a wide smirk. "Ay think ay've gowt an idea…"

Once upon a time there was a young girl called Snoutsnot Jorgenson…

And in the distance was the sound of fists against a locked door and a muffled voice yelling, "SNOTLOUT!"

Love it? Hate it? Indifferent? I'd love to know! Please review! (And sorry it's so short...I wasn't able to drag it out any longer)

- Flare, the Frivolous xx