Castle moves into the office while she exchanges a couple of words with Alexis, and once inside, he leans against the desk, waiting for her.

Kate walks in and closes the door behind her. Silence filling the room.

"You wanted to talk" he reminds her "maybe you should start" he says, no emotion evident in his voice.

She wants to yell at him, tell him he's the one dragging her there, but she refrains, "You didn't bring me coffee" she ends up saying.

"What?" the writer asks confused, raising his eyes to lock with hers.

"This morning" she clarifies "you didn't bring me coffee."

"You're joking aren't you?" he asks in disbelief "After all that happened, that's your complaint? That I didn't bring you coffee this morning?"

"I'm not complaining" she corrects him, though for sure she didn't liked it "It's not about the coffee, it hasn't been about the coffee for years" the detective confesses "I'm just saying that I can tell how mad you are, since you've always bring me some, no matter what, and you didn't this morning" she explains, and that seems to somehow make sense for him, because he settles.

"What the hell is going on, Kate?" he asks low, his voice desperate for a reason, for something that makes sense, because his writer mind is only giving him theories he doesn't want to listen to.

"I'm sorry, I didn't come home last night" she apologize.

"You're going to have to do a lot better than that, Kate" he tells her, calmer now, finally seeming to be able to control his emotions "What the hell is happening?" he begs for an explanation. Kate moves pass by him word towards their bedroom without saying a word "Where are you going? We're just starting here" Castle asks confused. Kate doesn't reply and Castle refrains to follow her, he doesn't want to believe that after all the fight she put to explain her reasons last night she can just walk away that easily. The detective comes back a few seconds later, handling him the file she had brought home from the precinct and walking away from him again. "What is this?" Castle asks not bothering to open it.

"It's a case file" Kate replies shortly. "Open it" she instructs him.

"No, Kate! Damn it!" he vents frustrated "This can't be an excuse" he tells her waving the file in front of him "So, what if you found another case? There will always be another case, Kate, always, and that's no reason for you not to come home!"

His voice is loud again, but Kate remains calm "It's not another case, it's the same" she says, her voice just above a whisper. Castle looks at her puzzled, unsure of what she's talking about. "Just open it" she pleads.

Castle obeys, even though annoyed. The first thing that gets his attention are the pictures of the young girls. Four of them. Blue eyes, long brown curls. "Kate" he whispers raising his eyes to find her resting her back against the wall. Her hand curled up against her mouth. "Are these the victims?" he asks. He still shadows her as often as he can, and even when he can't he still finds a way to be involved in the cases, but between the writing and the kids, recently they had agree he should take a break, and he is just now realizing that he has no clue about the case she had been working on. Kate nods, but she still doesn't say a word. "God Kate, they look just like…"

"I know!" she cuts him off, not wanting him to say what they're both thinking, that their daughter is just this guy's type. Same age, same features.

They stay quiet for another moment and it's Castle who eventually speaks again. He wishes he had known, wishes he had been there to support her, because he has no doubt this one was personal, he wants to comfort her, but he still can't understand why she didn't come home last night. "I thought you caught the guy" he states, waiting for her confirmation.

"We did" she says "we got him in custody, he confessed all the five abductions and murders" she tells the writer.

Castle nods slowly, trying to wrap his brain around the little information she's giving him "I'm sorry Kate, but I don't get it" he admits. "I'm sure this one was hard, but you caught the guy, he's locked up, why couldn't you have come home?" he inquires, he's definitely calmer now, but she can still hear the hurt in his voice.

"Five" Kate says simply, and Castle looks at her completely lost "He confessed to have kidnapped, abused and killed five girls, Castle. There're only four pictures in that file" she explains and finally things start to make sense.

"Oh Kate…" he calls softly, suddenly the anger lost along the way as he moves to approach her.

"We have no idea where she is. God, we don't even know who she is!" she vents, finally letting out her frustration. Castle reaches for her upper arm holding it softly "I know there will always be another case, Castle but everytime I looked at that murder board all I could see was Amy's face in those pictures" she confesses.

With that Castle pulls her close against his chest "She's fine Kate, she's just a room away, she's fine" he tries to reassure her.

She gives in for a moment, but soon she's pulling away, pacing around the room "This little girl… she's out there somewhere, alone. Maybe she's dead, maybe she's still alive, lost, trapped God knows where. And her parents, her family, they must be so worry and scared and…." she keeps rambling "And even if she's dead, Castle, even if she's dead, she's alone, probably dumped where no-one will never find her, and that's not fair Castle, that's not right…" she trails off, letting her body fall down on the couch.

He approaches her in silence, and settles next to her "Kate, I…"

"I'm fine, Castle" she shakes it off "I just got a little emotional, but I'm fine" she says trying to pull away again. This time he stops her, grabbing her wrist "Let me go, Castle" she orders and seeing that he's not obeying she begs "please Rick, let me go."

"Sit down, Kate" he directs her, his voice firm, but filled with love. The detective hesitates, but ends up doing it. The writer takes her hands on his, but gives her some space, knowing that she needs to feel in control. "The reason you didn't come home last night like everyone else did was because you were still looking for her" he says matter of fact. "You couldn't get the image of that little girl crying alone somewhere, or imagine what you would do if anything would ever happen to Amy" he continues, needing to make it clear he understands her reasons now.

"You're right" she finally speaks "It's stupid…"

"I never said it was stupid" he corrects her confused.

She ignores him, continuing her trail of thought "There will always be another case, there are tons of other missing children out there and I know that Castle, but…"

"... but they're not in your face, this one his" he finishes for her.

"Just because they aren't in my face every day it doesn't make them less important" the detective says frustrated.

"No" he agrees "but Kate, you can't blame yourself. The world can be a very dark place sometimes, but we have to keep moving, we can't dwell on everything bad that happens otherwise it would destroy us."

"So I should just be selfish and ignore it?" she asks, even though she knows that's not what he means.

Despite her tone Castle doesn't take it personally because he knows her well enough to know she's just projecting "No, you shouldn't ignore it, and you don't" he reminds her. "You're a cop, you catch bad guys for a living, you seek justice for the dead, I don't think that can be categorized as ignoring" he continues softly.

She shakes her head slightly "I know I'm being ridiculous, it's just…" she trails off and Castle squeezes her hand for reassurance, knowing that she needs to get it all out. "I love my job, Castle, I really do, but sometimes it's really hard to be surrounded by all this negativity, after all these years I still can't understand how people do this to eachother."

"I know" he agrees looking right through her and seeing that despite the conversation she's still really bothered. "This is not the whole story is it?" he gathers the courage to ask, hoping he's not pushing too hard "I'm not doubting that you were worried about that little girl Kate, but that wasn't the only reason you didn't came home, was it?" She bites her lower lip, a trick he knows too well. "You can tell me, Kate. Whatever it is, I know it's bothering you and you can tell me." He reassures her.

She hesitates for a couple of minutes but then gives in to him, like she always does. He has this way of making her feel safe, like nothing she can ever confess will make him love her any less. "I didn't want to bring it home" she finally admits.

"Bring what home?" he asks, not sure what she means.

"The darkness, the negativity, it didn't seem fair. The kids, they're so young, and naïve and purely happy and sometimes I'm not sure I have any of that in me anymore. And I don't want to destroy it, I know they need to know the real world, but I want to protect them so badly, I want to keep them pure for the longest I can and… And this particular case… all I could think was Amy, and I missed her so bad. The whole time we were working on it, all I wanted to do was hold her in my arms, make sure she was okay, but at the same time I was terrified to come home and look at her and imagine her in those crime scenes…" she confesses in one breath.

"Oh Kate…" he babbles, hating himself for not having seen it, for having fought with her on top of it all, for having doubt her, for having accused her of not caring about their children when it's obvious she loves them more than anything "Why didn't you tell me?" he asks, not in an accusatory mode, but sad that she didn't think she could have come to him.

Her lips curl into a little smile, the first one he's seen in days "Because you're just like them."

He's taken back with the comment, unsure of what to make of it "I'm just like a child?" he asks, trying not to sound too offended but failing miserably.

Kate cups his cheek with her palm "You're fun, and happy and always looking for the good in everything, and I love that about you" she clarifies "and I hate to think I'm the one taking you out of your colorful world and into the dark side everytime" she admits in a whisper.

"Kate, you put the color in my life!" he corrects her, and before he can even finish she's rolling her eyes at him "Okay, that was cheesy, but Kate just because I chose to see the bright side of life doesn't mean I'm not aware of what's going on around me, I do have days I wonder where this world is headed too, cracking jokes and making people laugh is just my way to cope with it I guess."

The detective nods slowly "I know."

"No matter how dark is the topic, I assure you that I much rather discuss it with you than knowing you're suffering in silence."

"Thank you" she whispers against his lips, right before kissing him slowly.

With all that has been going on Castle hadn't even realized how much he missed her lips on his until now, but before he can get is fix she's already pulling them away.

"I'm sorry I didn't call, I'm sorry I didn't come home, I'm sorry you felt we were going back…" she's interrupted by his point finger on her lips.

"I'm sorry about everything I said to you. You were right yesterday, I do know you better than that, and I should have given you a chance to explain" he apologizes too.

"You weren't wrong, I've done it before, running, hiding, lying even…" she says because even though she sometimes wishes she could forget she knows she hurt him in the past.

"Yes, it's true you've done all of that, but I also know how much you've worked to change that, Kate. I know that's not who you are anymore and I certainly know that you love and care about our children" he insists. They're both too worried trying to justify to another to even hear the knock on the door and they don't notice Alexis opening it either. "You're a great mother Kate, I had no right to doubt that" he makes sure to reaffirm.

Kate is about to speak when Alexis knocks on the already open door again, this time she manages to get their attention "Sorry guys" she apologizes blushing slightly "but I believe you made a promise to these two…" she says, opening the door wider to let their siblings enter the office.

The two little ones rush to their parents in a second as Alexis follows them slower. Kate squeals when the children crawl all over her and her laugh fills the room.

"Yes, I believe we did" Castle says, standing up with one kid in each arm.

"C'mon mommy!" the children call over Castle's shoulder.

Kate stands up with a smile, shaking her head slightly. "He's right, you know?" the detective is surprised by Alexis' voice.

"What?" Kate asks confused.

"About what he said" the young woman hesitates "about you're being a great mom, Kate" she explains, looking at her shyly. "My mom… well, you know her, she's not a bad person, she just wasn't cut of to be a mom, you know?" she continues.

"I'm sorry, Alexis…" the detective tries, but she's interrupted by the younger woman.

"It's fine, Kate" she says with a smile "I'm a big girl now, plus I have the best dad in the whole wide world, so I guess it makes up for it" she says and Kate can't help but feel proud about her husband. "I've always tried to use it in my advantage, this thing with my mom, I mean, I always figured I could learn from her mistakes" Alexis explains. "I guess what I'm trying to say is… I've always known how a mom shouldn't behave, but it was only until you and dad got together and Amy and Nate were born that I really understood what kind of mom I want to be and that's thanks to you, Kate"

"Alexis, I…" the detective babbles unsure of what to say. She has always been fond of the girl, even before she and Castle got together, but Alexis was already a young adult when they had got together so for Kate it wasn't always easy to figure what her role was with the girl.

"Sorry, Kate. I meant it as a compliment" Alexis rushes to say when confronted with Kate's silence. "I…"

"No, no Alexis, I know!" the detective assures her, reaching for her hands "It's just… it means a lot to me to hear that from you" she confesses and the girl gives her a warm smile. "It's like you said, your dad is the absolute best and I love that about him, but…"

"… but it also scares you" Alexis finishes for hear.

Kate nods "It's just the competition is really though, you know?" she says half joking.

Alexis nods "Well, from where I stand it looks like you're doing pretty well" she assures her.

Kate smiles, grateful for the family that she has and that she could had never dreamt for "Thank you!" she tells her, pulling Alexis into a hug.

"Hey, are you coming?" Castle peeks into the room, breaking the moment before he sees they're hugging eachother "Everything all right in here?" he asks concerned.

The two women share a look and laugh "Everything's fine, Castle" Kate tells him once they both join him towards the living room.

The End

Sorry, this one was a bit longer, but it didn't make sense to break it in 2.

Hope you enjoyed. Thank you for reading.