There are two kinds of Glee fans, thinks Chris.
Chris is thinking about the subject, because they have just finished shooting a big group number, meaning that most of the main cast is present when the script of The Break-Up episode is released. Like the good show choir family actors that they are, most of the cast sits around and gulps at their water bottles while reading over the new script. Given that they are on the show, Chris thinks that it's reasonably logical to assume that most, if not all, of the cast happens to be fans of the show.
And based on their reactions to the newest script, it is clear to Chris that there are two types of Glee fans.
The first kind are the relatively normal fans, the kind that ooh and aww at the right scenes, and laugh at the parts of the show that are meant to be funny.
Chris considers himself, Naya and Cory to be this kind of Glee fan.
They are disappointed in Blaine's character cheating, and maybe sniffle just a little at Kurt's reaction to I was with someone. Cory says: I can't believe Blaine would cheat, and Chris responds by commenting that Blaine was lonely and felt ignored and left behind, and that he sees where Blaine's character is coming from. (Although in reality, he doesn't really. Golden globes and international recognition? Check, he's got that. But the plethora of dating experience that is associated with the Hollywood life? Nope, Chris is still waiting patiently.)
Naya just sighs sadly and says that she hopes Kurt and Blaine reunite soon.
Overall, their reaction is relatively calm, and is exactly the reaction that writers hope to draw from the audience. Therefore, they are the normal Glee fans.
But then, Chris thinks, there are the shippers. The Klainers, to be more specific about this situation.
Chris definitely considers Harry and Chord to be this type of Glee fan, because while Chris himself is seated with the script propped up on the hand rest of his seat while he skims, Chord and Harry both jolt straight up to their feet and clutch the script with white knuckles and clenched jaws while their eyes move furiously back and forth, up and down, as if the script will change or disappear or something if they don't read fast enough.
To be fully honest, Chris is a little more entertained by Chord and Harry's reactions to the script than the script itself.
Chord: No, Blaine, no no no! Who the hell is this Eli. What does he even look like?!
Harry: Blaine, no man, you just—you just gotta talk to Kurt!
Chord: No. I can't even. Blaine! You'll never be able to take this back! Kurt is the man of your dreams. You were never supposed to say goodbye to each other! He moves you!
Harry: Blaine, don't you remember what you told Kurt?! If you're upset, go talk to Kurt, don't cheat on him!
Chord: NO! DON'T BREAK UP, DON'T.
Harry: Come on guys, you can work through this together!
Chord: I'M SO DONE WITH THIS MAN I NEED MY KLAINE BACK.
Harry's eyes are ridiculously huge, and Chris is sure that if Chord pouts any more, his lips are actually going to fall off and start a civilization all of their own. Their reactions to the break-up are overly emotional and personal, and Chris is just barely short of tapping their shoulders to remind them that Kurt and Blaine are fictional characters, when Darren darts by in a blur of boat shoes and bright colours and hair gel.
Ah, Darren.
If ever there was a dedicated Klainer, it would be Darren.
While Chris carefully keeps himself detached and distinct from Kurt, and relies on the fine art of subtlety for his acting, Darren and Blaine are a mess of character bleed and over-emoting that somehow manages to make both Darren and Blaine ridiculous (and almost begrudgingly) endearing. Blaine's dance moves are both his and Darren's, their sense of style and love for bright colours a mix of both personalities. And Blaine's outrageous heart eyes, which would be both sappy and incredibly tacky on anyone else, manages to be romantic and heartfelt on Darren's stupidly attractive face.
So while Chris sits in his chair and empathizes with the Klaine breakup, Darren frantically scrambles around set behind Ryan Murphy, flipping the script pages maniacally and flailing his hands around as he tries to explain that no, nonono, this absolutely positively cannot be happening you can't just- just- just break up Klaine like that! They're supposed to be together forever!
The next day, Darren's poor 'Klaine feels' clearly aren't faring much better, because when Chris cheerily waves and says good morning (albeit a little tiredly), Darren gets teary eyed and clings onto Chris in a hug that is lengthy ad decidedly very nice, but if one of them doesn't pull away soon Chris is going to be very, very late getting to hair and makeup to get Kurtified.
After three whole days of moping and sad puppy eyes from Darren, Chris decides that enough is enough.
Chris has been toying with the idea of asking Darren on a date for a few weeks now. Because yes, he is ready to get some dating experience under his belt now that he's a big star. But also, Darren's nice and nice to look at and had nicely let Chris know that the ball is in his court when they'd first met.
Well actually, Darren had started hitting on Chris dedicatedly and blatantly after his second day on set. But Chris had barely even been legal then, and despite being on Glee since the very first episode, he was still adjusting to all the attention and being genuinely liked by people. So Chris had babbled and stumbled and knocked things over in his nervousness and was just not ready to date yet.
But instead of being a jerk about, Darren had taken Chris' hand and looked at him earnestly with those big brown eyes. Instead of laughing at Chris, he had told him in a sincere and affectionate voice that he was very interested in Chris, and there was no one else that Darren is thinking about starting anything with anytime soon, and that he would like to try with Chris, when the day comes that Chris is ready, of course.
As Chris grew and learned more about Darren, he'd discovered that Darren is just genuinely nice and also kind of a goofball. And now Chris is ready to try with Darren too.
So after a long day of shooting and Darren's continued mourning for Klaine, Chris corners Darren inside his trailer.
Unfortunately, Darren apparently just has a lot of Klaine feelings he needs to share with Chris, and his rambling has nearly reached the thirty minute point when Chris gets a word in.
"—I mean, I know that Ryan's hinted a million times that Klaine is endgame, but I just can't be sure, right? What if the writers change their minds? They're just so meant to be together though, Kurt and Blaine. They've been through so much, and I mean, they already know their wedding song! Blaine's probably already got an idea of how he's going to propose! And man, I just really like kissing you, Chris—"
"You can still do that maybe, the kissing me part." Hints Chris, raising his eyebrow and sitting up a little straighter now that he's got Darren's full attention.
Darren is kind of gaping at him, halfway across the trailer but frozen in his pacing as the little beanie bag he'd been tossing up and down absentmindedly falls to the floor with a plop!
Chris squirms a little under Darren's scrutiny, because oh god, what if Darren's changed his minds and now that they're friends it's just awkward that Chris has—
But then Darren straightens, tugging his plaid shirt down to fit properly as his teeth appear in a grin that is soon pretty much dominating his entire face.
"Oh man," whispers Darren, still a little doe eyed but grinning happily as he claps his hands together victoriously, "Crisscolfer. I ship it. It is so on."
There are two kinds of people in the world, sighs Chris, as Darren stalks towards the couch where Chris is seated, with an expression that is halfway between excitable puppy and absolutely hungry predator.
Just a short little piece I wrote for fun! Leave me a comment with your thoughts?
:) x