A/N - And they're back... this time with their women lol...

SurvivorHawke, thanks for your review and encouragement... this series is my answer to stress and writer's block while writing my other fics, so I'll likely have other sessions as the mood strikes and I get ideas~

All characters within are the property of Bioware, I own none of them... As always, this chapter may contain spoilers from any part of the Dragon Age and Mass Effect series, including associated DLC.

Kaidan was still muttering under his breath and – ok he was man enough to admit – dragging his feet as they approached the BBSG room, which was now decorated with a cheerful 'BBSG Couples Mixer' sign. Before his wife could open the door, he turned to her and tried one more time, "Shepard, are you sure you want to do this?"

The glare his very pregnant wife returned to him before she opened the door and walked inside proved both that she was still Commander Shepard, and that she didn't buy that his objection was out of concern for her for a second. Kaidan took a deep breath and followed her in.

The traditional circle of chairs in the middle of the room had been removed this week, and instead there were comfortable seating groups throughout. The refreshment table was still in its usual place and Kaidan followed his wife there as he surveyed the room. There were more couples here than he had expected. He did see his new friends Alistair and Anders, with women he assumed were their wives, but there were several other couples he didn't recognize. Once he managed to win a silent battle of wills with his stubborn wife and convince her to pour tea for herself rather than coffee, he steered her toward the familiar faces. If he had to be here, fine, but he wasn't in the mood for meeting new people.

The quartet was seated near the long wall of windows and as they approached, Kaidan corrected his mental count. Alistair was holding a small bundle – his new daughter. As always, when the king saw Kaidan approach, he broke out into a warm, friendly grin. "Kaidan!" Alistair greeted him cheerily, "come meet my ladies!"

Kaidan helped Shepard onto the couch opposite the other couples and sat beside her. "Alistair, Anders," he greeted the other men with a nod.

As the flurry of introductions followed, Kaidan studied the women beside his new friends. Alistair's wife was slim and tiny, and garbed in similar medieval dress as her husband. She wore wicked and deadly looking twin daggers on her back in custom scabbards that appeared to be designed for cross-draw over the shoulder. She was a beautiful green-eyed redhead and Kaidan thought she was rather quiet compared to her boisterous mate.

Ander's wife was also a redhead, but taller, and she was visibly pregnant - although she didn't appear to be as far along as Shepard. She wore leather breaches that appeared to be greaves of the same type of armor that her friends preferred, but a loose tunic accompanied them in concession to her condition. She also wore twin daggers, and Kaidan grimaced at the thought of the discussion he and Shepard had over leaving her favorite shotgun behind. It had made them late to this mixer, and Kaidan now realized that he would be paying for it later.

Kaidan shook himself out of his thoughts when he realized all eyes were on him. Apparently someone – it appeared to be Alistair again – had been speaking to him, and he had missed it completely. "I'm sorry?" he asked, endured the elbow to the ribs from his wife, and pasted a conciliatory smile on his face for Alistair, "I didn't hear you."

"Oh," Alistair said, and his smile seemed rather knowing… either the other man spent time drifting off himself or he had seen the poke to Kaidan's ribs – perhaps both. "That's ok… I was just saying how nice it was of Dr. Taylor to set this up so we could all meet the balls-and-ch-" Alistair broke off with an, "oof," as his wife delivered a blow of her own. "Err, I meant meet each other's wives," he corrected.

"Where is Dr. Taylor?" Kaidan wondered, surveying the room again and not finding the ubiquitous white bun anywhere.

"Oh," Anders replied with a sly grin, "I think after last week, she's avoiding us."

Alistair chuckled and Kaidan joined in, sharing a moment of solidarity with the other men until they noticed three pairs of green eyes glaring at them disapprovingly. They cut the laughter off and covered it with three simultaneous coughs.

"Why don't you three go mingle while we get acquainted," Shepard broke in, unconvinced.

Alistair, Anders, and Kaidan shared matching looks of panic before Alistair handed the baby off to his wife and rose. Anders and Kaidan reluctantly followed. The three friends wandered off together toward the refreshments table, under the ruse of topping off their drinks. Once they were out of earshot, the trio turned enough so that they could surreptitiously watch their wives - who were now huddled together in conversation.

"Do you suppose they're talking about us?" Alistair asked quietly.

"Do you suppose they're talking about anything but us?" Anders shot back with sarcasm.

All three men visibly shuddered.

"Have you noticed…" Kaidan began but then broke off, unsure of how his observation of the three women would be received by the other men.

"That they're all redheads?" Alistair filled in.

"With green eyes," Anders added.

"And could kill us without blinking," Kaidan finished the summary of their wives' similarities.

The three men shared a conspiratorial look then turned back to their wives.

"They're all pregnant," Anders mused, "or have just given birth, in your wife's case, Alistair."

"Right," Kaidan responded, not sure of the significance of the remark.

"I'm a healer," Anders said by way of explanation, "so I can tell you that women in that condition tend to be… more emotional," he finished delicately. "And if your wives are anything like Hawke – which evidence seems to suggest – more emotional is a bad thing. For us."

Once again the three shared a look, this time one of rising panic, then turned back to their wives.

"This can't be good," Kaidan murmured.

"For us," Alistair appended.

"We need to do something," Anders said, his voice devoid of its usual wry humor.

"We can't leave," Kaidan pointed out.

"Dear Maker no," Anders agreed with a shudder. "I'd still have to face her once we got home."

Alistair and Kaidan nodded vigorously in agreement.

"Perhaps a ruse?" Anders suggested. "Maybe make them think we saw darkspawn attacking or something?"

"Good thinking," Alistair agreed quickly, "but… wait. My wife has the taint; she would know it was a lie when she didn't sense them."

"I'm not sure what darkspawn or the taint are," Kaidan pointed out patiently and practically, "but do we really want our pregnant wives jumping into battle? Fake or not?"

Alistair and Anders froze then shook their heads in sync.

"Quick thinking," Alistair said with a slap to Kaidan's back, "I wouldn't want my daughter in the fray either."

"So what can we do?" Anders asked impatiently, "I only know of one sure way to distract Hawke… and it's not suitable for polite company."

The three men shared a knowing grin then sobered.

"One of us needs to sacrifice themselves," Kaidan offered quietly. "Go back over there and break it up. If it's just one, they can't all gang up on us."

"Perhaps," Anders said thoughtfully, "but the 'one' is going to suffer their wife's wrath." They all shuddered. "So how do we decide?"

The three men turned to each other once again and engaged in a silent standoff. Finally, Alistair sighed and stepped forward. "I'll do it," he muttered, "I have a big sword." He placed his hand on the hilt of his weapon to demonstrate and wandered off toward the group of women.

"Hey," Anders complained to Alistair's departing back, "there's nothing wrong with my sword – err, staff!"

Kaidan grinned and slapped Anders on the back in appreciation of the man's joke. He figured trying to explain BFG might be a waste of time. They watched together as Alistair approached their wives, who were now very animated. Apparently their plan was timely. Alistair spoke to the group and listened as they replied. He immediately turned back to the other men and beckoned them with a panicked wave. Kaidan and Anders resisted, but Alistair waved again frantically. They started toward the group.

"So much for our brilliant plan," Anders remarked sarcastically.

"Yeah," Kaidan agreed, "next time, we send you."

Anders' chance to reply was cut off as they were now within earshot of their wives, which also allowed Kaidan to hear Shepard call his name in a tone of voice he'd never heard her use. He rushed to her side, looking for Reapers out of his peripheral vision, and knelt beside her. "Shepard, what's wrong?" he questioned her as he took her hands and searched her face for clues.

"We need to leave. Now," Shepard told him with gritted teeth and panic on her face, "My water just broke - the baby is coming."

As Kaidan rushed to assist his wife off the couch and gather their things to leave, he heard murmurs of congratulations and well wishes from their friends. Just before they were out of earshot, he heard Anders' voice call, "Good job!" and he understood his friend wasn't referring to the impending birth. Kaidan was still chuckling – despite Shepard's glare – as they rushed out to head to the nearest hospital.