This fic is about the book "Wonder", of R. J. Palacio. I'm a non english-speaker (it's called that? I don't know; I mean I'm spanish), so forgive and forget my more-than-possible errors. Thank you.

I'm trying something diferent: it's on August POV, and the pairing is a clumsy attempt of August/Jack (slight yaoi which I like calling Jagguie or Jagust). So no flames, please. If you don't like it, don't read it... or better, write another fic which you like!

I sometimes wonder why I'm how I am. But I never had to wonder why I feel what I feel, not before meeting Jack.

He is not perfect, I know. In fact, I will always remember that horrible things he said about me in Halloween... I have told him many times I have already forgotten the "Halloween Incident", but it isn't true; I don't hold him a grudge, but I haven't forgotten it, that's all. As i've said, he's not perfect at all.

But I can't stop looking him the way I do. This is very strange. I know he isn't perfect, but I'm sure he is... yeah, it's confusing. I have already said so before. And if it's confusing for you, who are looking at all of it from outside, imagine how confusing is for me, who I am just in the eye of the hurricane.
I hate this feeling. It's something which doesn't allow me to sleep well, because when I try it, I end with Jack running all around my head... his smile, his hair, his way to shrug, his laugh... This is a crap. Really.

When I finally got a word for describing this, I couldn't believe myself. I even had to look for it in the dictionary: love. I'm not stupid, I know what it means... but I hoped the dictionary could help me to clarify everything... It didn't.
1. A profoundly tender, passionate affection for another person.
2. A feeling of warm personal attachment or deep affection, as for a parent, child, or friend.
3. Sexual passion or desire.
4. A person toward whom love is felt; beloved person; sweetheart.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah... I already know that, man. I just want to know, WHICH OF THAT DEFINITIONS SUITS ME!
Okay, don't freak out and let's see... do I feel affection for Jack? ... Yep, definetly. After all, he was the kindest person I'd ever meet... he is still, I guess I could say (sorry, Summer). But what kind of affection? Tender or passionate? ... Better pass to the next point...
Well, Jack is my friend, my best friend in fact, so I... I feel whatever the dictionary says. So that's it. But I've already know that... Next.
Oh, Gosh. Do I really feel sexual desire to Jack? Of course not! I'm ten, geez. Next!
And this is the last one... Sweetheart? Gosh. Jack is not my sweetheart... But do I want him to? ...

Fuck this crap. Really. It's making me nervous; almost worse than when people stare at me like they do... like I had butterflies in my stomach, fluttering and... Wait. No, no, no, no, no! That's what Via always says about her and Justin... and they are going out.

Damn it. I have to admit it. I love Jack. Not as a friend, though. And what's worst: he's definetly not in love with me.