A/N: I'm SO sorry this update took so long, I've been having Internet problems.

Nearing the end of this chapter Four gets another tattoo, and its kind of hard to describe, so if you're struggling to understand, go onto google images and type into google:- male arm tattoos and count from the right 12. It's that one. ENJOY! :)

~Slightly Afraid

I wish you knew

Chapter four

"The first thing you will learn today is how to shoot a gun. The second is how to win a fight." I press a gun into Tris' hand without looking at her- because I know I won't be able to control the blush that creeps up my skin every time I think of her- and keep on walking. "Thankfully, if you are here, you already know how to get on and off a moving train, so I don't need to teach you that." I look over to Tris, and can tell by the look on her face, that she's tired. Her eyes are dark and her shoulders are slumped, but she looks fierce. She holds the gun like it's supposed to be held. Like it was a killing machine, unlike some of the other transfers that were messing around and playing with the weapon.

"Initiation is divided into three stages. We will measure your progress and rank you according to your performance in each stage. The stages are not weighed equally in determining your final rank, so it is possible, though difficult, to drastically improve your rank over time." I graze over each of the initiates faces, making eye contact with a few of them. They look nervous. I can't help the smile that tugs at the corners of my lips. I'm enjoying being intimidating!

"We believe that preparation eradicates cowardice, which we define as the failure to act in the midst of fear," I say "therefore each stage of initiation is intended to prepare you in a different way. The first stage is primarily physical; the second, primarily emotional; the third, primarily mental."

"But what…" Peter a transfer from Candor, yawns through his words. "What does firing a gun have to do with… bravery?" His stupid question pushed me. I flip the gun in my hand, press the barrel to Peter's forehead and click the bullet into place.

"Wake. Up." I snap. "You're holding a loaded gun you idiot. Act like it."

I decided that if he started being overly cocky and well… Candor, around me again I'd shoot him in the foot. I move the gun away from his head and step back. I'm really surprised when he doesn't reply, but keeps his mouth shut, his cheeks turning red.

"And to answer your question… You are far less likely to soil your pants and cry for your mother if you're prepared to defend yourself." I stop walking at the end of the row and turn on my heal. "This is also information you may need later in stage one. So, watch me." I face the wall with the targets on it and let my feet find the middle target. I stand shoulder width apart, holding the gun in both hands, and fire. As usual the bullet hits the centre. I turn back to face the transfers, and every face is filled with a mixture of awe, jealousy and envy. Everyone except Tris. She looks amazed and fascinated and turns round to face her own target. She stands, just like I did, and raises her gun. She fires, misses her target and stumbles a bit. This carries on (minus the stumbling as she managed to stand still) for five more rounds, until an Ertrude transfer- Will- whispered something to her. She obviously took his advice as she hit the target on the next shot. She carries on and soon she hits the centre. I look around at the other initiates faces, and find that she's the only one to have hit the centre of the target. I look at her delicate face and find that she wears the brightest smile I've ever seen.

oOo

By the time we brake for lunch, every initiate looked tired and warn out. They're still going to have to train after lunch though. When we got into the cafeteria I found Zeke, Shauna, Lauren, Mercedes, Scar, Trapper, Xander and Peaches (all friends from my initiation) and sat down. Zeke passed me a piece of Chocolate cake and a bottle of Pepsi (Whilst looking in the files last year in the control room I found a bunch of top secret recipes including Pepsi, Something called Pop tarts and Toblerone) and I guzzled them down almost instantly. "No Uriah?" I asked Zeke.

"Nah. Not today. He's trying to make a move on Marline. He's sitting over there with her, Lynn, Creeper and Brendon." I look over to where Uriah sits and smile at his failing attempt to attract Marline. "The names some of the Dauntless born pick are ridiculous!" I say laughing. My friends soon join in and Peaches tries to say something but he can't speak because of laughter. Soon Shauna pipes up. "You can talk! What's your name again? Four?" we all start laughing again and Lauren almost falls on the floor. This is why I chose Dauntless.

oOo

After lunch I lead the transfers to the training room where I'd hung up the punching bags yesterday. All of the nine of the initiate's names are written on the chalk board in alphabetical order at the far end of the room. I tell them to each stand behind a punching bag whilst I stand in the middle, where they can all see me.

"As I said this morning," I say "next you will learn how to fight. The purpose of this is to prepare your body to respond to threats and challenges-which you will need, if you intend to survive life as a Dauntless." I look at Tris and she looks thoughtful. She looks worried. I feel the need to go over to her and give her a hug, to tell her she'll make it through initiation, that she'll be fine. But I can't do that. I have to suppress my feelings for her.

"we will go over technique today, and tomorrow you will start to fight each other," I say unenthusiastically. "So I recommend that you pay attention. Those who don't learn fast will get hurt." I demonstrate the right and left hook, uppercut, jab, Front snap kick, Back Kick, Side kick and the Round House kick demonstrating each one as I do, first in the air, then o the punching bag.

After they have a basic knowledge of fighting I stand back to watch. Edward, a transfer from Ertrude, is by far the best fighter. I heard Al say that he'd been studying combat since he was young. My eyes graze across the room, and finally land on Tris her punching bag doesn't move far, but that's understandable as she's small. I decide that I want to talk to her, to give her advice, but to make it seem less conspicuous, I wonder round the room, briefly giving advice to each transfer. I finally reach Tris, but I'm at a loss for words.

I look over her entire body, purely thinking of something to say.

"You don't have much muscle," I say "which means your better off using your knees and elbows. You can put more power behind them." Without thinking, I suddenly put my hand on her stomach. I was about to pull my hand away when I thought of something I could say in order to keep my hand against her skin.

"Never forget to keep tension here." I pull my hand away and walk towards the blackboard so that she couldn't see the blush that was creeping along my neck.

When I dismiss the transfers for dinner I look at Tris and see Christina nudge her elbow. "I'm surprised he didn't break you in half!" She says "he scares the hell out of me. It's that quiet voice he uses. She looked over her shoulders at me and I looked away, randomly moving the punching bags one handed. I was really showing off now. "Yeah he's..." He's what?! Please don't say terrifying. I don't think I could live with myself if she said that. "...Defiantly intimidating" THANK GOD!

I decided I was going to get another on my shoulder or my arm. I'd decide on the way. When I arrived at the tattoo parlour, I see Tris's friend Al getting a tattoo from Bud, and quietly slip round to Tori's work station. "Hey Four back so soon?" I laugh and smile brightly at her. "Tori it's been 7 months since I was last here!" I wink at her and sit down in the chair taking my shirt off. "I want this one right here." I say pointing to the wall and my shoulder. It was an old Celtic design that reached up to my neck and stretches halfway down my bicep. Tori smiles and goes to get the ink and tattoo pen.

An hour later Tori finally stops and puts the needle down. "There you go Four all done. Wow I am really good!" She laughs and I smile standing up to look in the mirror on the other side of the room. "I gave one of your initiates a tattoo today." Why's she telling me this? "Her name was Tris. She spoke a lot about you. Good things." My heart flutters and a smile forms on my face. Tris was talking about me?

I left the tattoo parlour smiling and for the first time since My mother left, leaving me with my overly abusive father, I slept without nightmares.