A/N – Hi Guys! So I decided to start a new fic! I am going to probably start another 1 or 2 fics too so keep an eye out for them. I decided to this one fic simply because, it seemed fun to do: P

Without further ado, I present to you THE RULES FOR BEING AROUND THE AVENGERS.

Nick fury was, for lack of a better description, furious. So far in this one month they had managed to loose him several agents, caused several fights, been part of several fights, destroyed half of the hellicarrier, and well, the list goes on. So since he didn't want to do this by himself he called in his left hand man. He pressed the button on the side of his communicator that would connect him to the person he was seeking.

"Coulson. Get over here to my office now. Its time, things have gotten way too far out of hand."

"Be there in a minute, sir."

A~A~A~A~A~A~A~A~A~A~A~A~A~A~A

Rule 1 – Do not under any circumstances put clown toys in Clint's quarters, mainly you TONY! He does not find it funny, nor shall anyone else. He will get very angry, and an angry master marksman is not good for anyone. He will find who did it. And he will hurt you. You have been warned.

Rule 2 – Tony does not like having water thrown at his face. Only Pepper or Rodey may throw water at him without his permission. He does not find it funny and brings back memories of Afghanistan for him.

Rule 3 – If you value your sanity, do not put Barbie's near Natasha. She does not like them, and does not find the singing one funny at all. She is a highly trained assassin and can torture you in more than 30 different ways.

Rule 4 – Do not throw Ice cubes or anything cold at Steve. He is not a 'king of the ice' for surviving 70 years frozen in the ice, and throwing ice or other cold substances at him is not a form of worshipping him.

Rule 5 – If you are a junior agent, and have the joys of being trained by Agents Barton and Romanoff, do not under any circumstances, ask them about their ' relationship' they are not in any form of relationship, doing so may cause them to do a torture demonstration on you.

Rule 6 – Paint ball matches across the hellicarrier are banned. No Avengers VS any of the Ops team. Or anything like that.

Rule 7 – the song 'you are a pirate' is here forth banned from ever being played, sung, hummed, or any way made audible for others to hear. Tony and Clint, it is not funny. You may become 'pirates' yourself if you don't stop getting the junior agents to hum that song or sing it.

Rule 8 – Do not try lifting Thor's hammer. You are not worthy of holding it as you are not the god of thunder. There are not to ever again be 'who is worthy' party's where you try to lift the hammer. Why would you even think you could lift it?

Rule 9 – Provoking Bruce is just stupid. Who ever thought that throw mash potato at him in the cafeteria was wise? You're just stupid. The repairs are coming out of your pay check, and if any one provokes him again into hulking out, then the same thing will happen to you.

Rule 10 – Organising 'S.H.I.E.L.D. Sleep overs' is banned. Inviting the Avengers is just your death wish. Tony is not a night light, Clint and Natasha will not kiss in the closet or play that game, Steve feels really awkward, Thor has no idea what he should be doing, and Bruce gets agitated.

A/N – so there is the first 10 rules of being around the avengers. I may write small one shot's about each rule. What do you guys think? Please review, more reviews = more updates