The Deadpooling of Tsukune Aono
Chapter 12: A Whole New Way to Piss
COUNTER, COUNTER! CLASH AND BRAWL! Tsukune and Aqua were fighting for their lives (or are they immortal? I mean Tsukune has gotten killed thousands of times before and has got back up), but regardless! Tsukune used Toho..I can't pronounce the rest of his name's technique to counter Aqua's dimension sword! Tsukune wasn't here to f ## around either, he knew Aqua would know everything he was going to do, but that wouldn't help her since he knew everything she was going to do! STRANGE ISN'T IT!?
"Stop hitting my arm! I think you cut off a hair that time!" Tsukune whined.
"Aiya! How can this be!? My one weapon, useless!" Aqua thought to herself.
"You're one of the strongest members of this organization and you only have one useful method of attack. You know they have a word for people like you, but I don't remember what that is." Deadpool scratched his head as he searched for an answer.
"Dumb-ass?!" Vageta's voice called out from afar.
"Yeah that's it!" Deadpool smiled.
Tsukune's condition was getting worse and worse, now almost half of his body was enveloped in the jet-black ghoul form. It would take a miracle to save him now, but unfortunately miracles are usually associated with the bible and in my country someone could get offended. So how about, somebody has to help Tsukune or he'll f***ing die!?
"Oh no! This IS the worst! Oh if only SOMEBODY could get off her sorry ass and help me out! Somebody with white hair...and red eyes...and...SWEET CHRIST MOKA GET UP AND HELP ME!" Tsukune yelled.
"Oh yeah..right. RIP AND TEAR!" Inner Moka stormed into battle with a frightening flurry of flying punches and furious kicks. Sending our awkward little Aqua around like an appetizing appetizer at an alphabetized Applebees. You see? It's alliteration!
"I'd totally rip and tear her if you know what I mean..." Deadpool thought to himself.
"Dude, is she even legal?" Nappa asked.
"Um...get back to me on that in like 7 years when I convince myself I'm not a cradle robber." Deadpool's eyes became perfect circles and he broke out into a cold sweat.
"Hasn't stopped you before." Nappa added.
"GOD DAMN IT NAP...!"
Tsukune and Moka were kicking the ever loving shit out of Aqua, literally there was so much brown you could call the room they were in a log cabin.
"What the? What are you made of!?" Tsukune asked.
"Aiya, the things I had to eat to gain my immortality..." Aqua looked down in shame.
"OH DEAR GOD!" Tsukune yelled.
"Pfft...HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" Deadpool laughed.
Aqua decked Tsukune in the halls and sent him flying back like a dragonball character. Unlike those characters though Tsukune couldn't stop himself and smacked right into Deadpool who was still laughing at the time. The two landed on the floor in pain, except for Deadpool because healing factor. Deadpool picked his sorry ass up off the ground and looked greatly pissed off at Aqua.
"Hit me once, shame on you. Hit me twice, shame on me. Hit me three times and make it look like a yoai moment and some bitch is gonna die!" Deadpool clenched his butt cheeks together and started screaming loudly. A red energy field surronded Deadpool, confusing the hell out of everyone watching.
"Aiya, what's he doing!? Aiya!" Aqua said.
"WE GET IT! YOU'RE CHINESE!" Tsukune yelled, still on the ground that he was thrown onto.
Deadpool's eyes began to glow a bluish-green color, and his mask kept fading from gold to red and then back to gold. His screaming became louder and louder, as did his overwhelming power level.
"MOKA! What does the scouter say about his power level!?" Aqua yelled.
Moka took off the random scouter she had on her head and grasped it in her hand.
"IT'S OVER..."
"DAMN RIGHT IT'S OVER...FOR YOU!" Deadpool interrupted Moka's attempt at using a 4,000 year old meme.
With one final surge of power, Deadpool's costume had become a full golden color, and his eye holes were now colored a bluish-green color. Deadpool was now...
"...A SUPER SAYIAN! Or is it Sayin...? Saiajin!..?...Majin...?"
Deadpool's new found power shocked and awed our heroes and villains (and Aqua), and by that I mean they were so confused as to how the hell he pulled it off.
"Super poop-er scoopers are just legend...aiya!" Aqua said.
"You don't know your transformations do you?" Tsukune sighed.
With quick thinking, Deadpool put his new powers to use and kicked Aqua in the face!
"Okay first question...WHAT!? Second question...THE F***!?" Aqua asked angrily.
"You really don't know what I am? Well let me tell you..." Deadpool began, "I am the hope of the universe, I am the last airbender, I am the bacon in the fridge that answers to those who cry out in hunger, I am Lanipator's beard whenever he gets cold, I am OHOAN's writer whenever he goes on hiatus for 7 years and doesn't tell anyone! I am Son-Deadpool, and I am a Super..." Aqua punches Deadpool in the mouth, "...Sayin!" Deadpool finishes.
Aqua's anger sky-rocketed, not only was she irritated by Deadpool's banter, but she knew that Deadpool was now a force to be reckoned with.
Aqua spoke, "How can some low life idiot like you do this!? You're nothing but a joke! I am an incestuous lesbian compared to yo...let me try that again..."
"Yeah...no." Deadpool rocketed to Aqua and fired a flurry of punches, putting tiny craters into Aqua's body in the process. "Please let me know if I hit something that hurts you too much, that would really be helpful in defeating you!" Deadpool bantered.
Aqua was absolutely livid now, her eyes burned purple and her fangs became so sharp that she could cut a shark in half with one bite. She forced Deadpool off of her by kicking him in the hips, breaking several of them in the process.
"Babe I told you, if I was too much to handle you can use the safe word." Deadpool smiled cheek-to-cheek.
"I WILL F****ING MURDER YOU!" Aqua's body began to emit a purple energy field similar to the one Deadpool had earlier, unlike Deadpool's however this one began to form around her body like a symbiote.
Deadpool observed the situation, "I would say tentacle rape but..."
Aqua's body was now fully encased in a symbiotic shell, a protective armor if you will.
"Witness your own destruction at my hands! I will make sure that no dragon alive would be able to fix what I do to you!" Aqua threatened.
"So...is that your dominatrix outfit or...?" Deadpool got bitch slapped by Aqua and sent flying across the room. "Okay...that's a yes..."
End of Chapter 12!
One Hell of a Corner;
Hahahaha...oh boy...wasn't it funny when I left for a while to write and finish another story and you guys had to wait for ten years? Wasn't that great...oh god I am so sorry! I'm sorry guys for this long delay and I swear it won't happen again! Due to my busy life I was forced to take a break from fanficiton all together and did some other things. I did write a horror themed fic but now I am back here and dear lord I think this was overdue! So please accept this as a token of my sorry-ness! I hope you liked it and I'm glad you guys have been so patient! So now you can stop setting fire to my house and threatening me with pitchforks and dominatrixes. See you all next month!
~One Hell of a Night!