Life of a Lily

Disclaimer: I do not own Downton Abbey, I simply watched it, fell in love with it, and decided to do what I always do with tv shows I love… write fanfiction about it!

Synopsis: Mary and Matthew were certain they were destined to be the opposite of Cora and Robert, have three beautiful boys to raise. But when Lily Crawley is welcomed into the world, she is the light of their life and takes Downton Abbey by storm. But how much of this storm can the family bear before they succumb to it?

In which Matthew DOES NOT DIE! And it will be structured with the first half of the story (however many chapters it ends up being, I do not know) being Lily growing up, interacting with the family and the staff and the second half will be the plotline I have come up for Lily, Mary, and Matthew. In addition, for the sake of giving Edith a suitor who is proper (and not married), she truly married Sir Anthony Strallen and was not jilted at the altar.

This chapter is more of an introduction to the family, etc… If it's kind of boring I am sorry. I will post the next chapter as soon as I can!

A/N: I have noticed many people have read the first chapter but not gone on to read the rest of them, please do not let the style of this chapter determine your view on the rest of the story, this is more a synopsis of everything and almost a prologue, try chapter 2 and 3 before you make any decisions please (:

When Mary found out she was pregnant with her first child, she had been relieved. The operation had been a success, her husband and she were perfectly fertile, and they were well on their way to making a family.

"We've done our duty," was the words that came out of her mouth as she welcomed her son into the world. Matthew, having still been up North when she went into labor, absolutely delighted. His parting words still lingered in the air, the taste of his lips on hers, when her father came in much later than she expected.

Not bothering to comment on his tardiness, still holding the baby to her chest, she looked up at him fondly.

"Meet your grandson Papa," she beamed. Robert smiled weakly, sitting down on the bed.

"Mary, I pray, put the baby down for a moment," he whispered.

"Are you not happy Papa?" Mary looked taken back. "It's a boy… what is the matter?" Now that the baby was safely in his crib Robert opened his mouth.

"There's been an accident," he told her strongly, taking her hand in his. Immediately she snatched it back.

"But he was just here," she hissed, knowing it was about Matthew or her papa would not have asked her to put the baby down. "Is he alright, I must go to him!"

"Mary, you must rest. Dr. Clarkson is with him now, I'm afraid, it didn't sound good," Robert's throat tightened as he looked at the baby in the crib; being woken up a second later by the sob that escaped Mary's mouth.

"Hush my darling," she croaked, her own tears spilling down her face. Her mind reeling, she looked down at her perfect son, already so much like his father. Though he had her hair, the rest of him was Matthew. People tried to console her the rest of the day but she would not let him go, not stop looking at him, until she was allowed to see Matthew. She had to make up for the time she was about to miss with him.

Once she was allowed to see her husband, she didn't leave his side except to feed the baby. When he was conscious, he was groggy. The baby was not named until about a week after he was born.

William Thomas Crawley was Mary's life. With Matthew fully recovered she poured her heart and soul out for the boy. Her Mama and Papa found it miraculous, how little she relied on the nanny during the next few months. The nanny did the baby's laundry, she changed him most of the time, bathed him most of the time, but there was seldom a night when she would rise to calm the crying baby that Mary, Matthew, or both of them would fly into the room to soothe their son.

As a surprise for Matthew, when Mary discovered she was pregnant again around Christmas of 1922, she did not tell him until Christmas Day. During luncheon when they exchanged presents with the rest of her family, she handed him only an envelope. Inside it read:

Lady Mary and Mr. Matthew Crawley will be proud to welcome another son or daughter into their lives June of 1923.

Uncharacteristically, he swept her up in his arms and kissed her in front of the whole family. The letter dropped to the floor, Mary snatched William from her father, and they continued blissfully as just the three of them until Isobel picked up the note and let out a delighted shriek.

Robert Matthew Crawley was born traditionally, Mary lying in her bed, Matthew pacing downstairs, Cora and Isobel by Mary's side, Violet sitting down, asking Carson for more tea.

Matthew had wished for a little girl but his Bertie, as they immediately began to call him, was perfect.

"We've got two beautiful boys," Matthew whispered as he sat on the edge of her bed, cradling Robert as she rocked William to sleep. "One more, don't you think."

"A little girl," Mary smiled proudly.

"A little girl," he nodded.

Mary was pregnant again by 1924, any thoughts of infertility banished from their minds, they had no trouble getting pregnant.

The family was in the nursery; Tom had taken Sybbie to Liverpool to visit his brother so it was just the four of them. They had a night time routine, Mary would sit in the rocking chair Bertie on her chest, William curled against her side. Matthew would read them a bed time story in his chair beside them before they put them to bed.

"Soon we will be doing this with a baby girl," Matthew said wishfully in Mary's ear. Mary smiled softly at him.

"We do not know if it is a girl Matthew," she reminded him, rubbing her stomach.

"I can dream, can I not?"

"You want a baby sister my darling," Mary affectionately asked William who knuckled his eyes in exhaustion.

"Where?" the two year old, almost three year old questioned.

"In Mama's belly," Mary told him and the boy, his bright blue eyes suddenly wide, gasped and kissed his Mama's belly with a giggle.

"Ister!"

A few days later, the boy toddled into his Mama's bedroom having escaped from his nanny, and looked up at her. She lay in bed, her face pale, her eyes glazed over. Anna, his mother's lady's maid held a damp cloth to her head. No one noticed he was there.

"Mama," he cried. The ghost of a smile on her face scared him as she asked Anna to lift him on the bed for her. "Mama," he reached up to cup her cheek as he saw his Papa do so often. "Sad? Baby Ister?"

"My darling boy," Mary croaked. "You are not getting a baby sister, not yet anyway. I am so sorry." She asked Anna to bring Bertie to them as well while William laid his head on his Mama's chest. He was just like her husband who knew when and what to say and do, but even her living boys could not help her getting over the loss of another child.

"Mary," Matthew whispered softly hours later, walking into their room, not shocked to see the boys in there and fast asleep. She was not asleep, she had been crying. "My darling." He reached out a hand to brush her hair from her face.

"Matthew don't," she hissed. "You-you'll wake them up… and I will cry again."

"I love you so much," Matthew informed her.

"I know," Mary whimpered. "But-"

"This was not your fault, we can try again," he reassured. "For now it will be just us and the boys."

"Dr. Clarkson told me he thinks it best that we do not try and get pregnant for year, to let my body recover and-" she choked back a sob and Matthew climbed in bed, despite still being dressed, and pressed a kiss to her forehead.

"Then we will wait a year my darling, we will get another child," he sighed. Mary closed her eyes and for a moment Matthew thought she had fallen asleep.

"It was a boy you know… I believe we may be destined to have all boys."

Mary kept her spirits up for the boys in the days and weeks to come. Matthew was loving, her family supportive. Everyone reassuring her that she is bound to get a girl at some point. It sounded so strange to hear everyone wanting a girl for them, especially The Dowager, but it was only because they had already done their duty two times over. Edith, who Mary tried so hard to be civil with, was even careful not the rub her twins, a boy named Theodore Anthony Strallen and a girl Elizabeth Josephine Strallen in her face.

After a year of waiting and a year of trying, nothing happened. It seemed as though her blossoming, beautiful five year old and four year old, who acted so much like their father, were to be their only children.

The previous night had been Bertie's birthday party; she was so thankful for having a nanny to wrestle them out of their outfits Cora had bought for them and get them ready to be rocked. Occasionally Mary would do this, but she was so exhausted. The nanny said she was taking the boys and six year old Sybil on a picnic outside on the grounds tomorrow and would be happy if they would join them.

Instead, Mary was sick a majority of the morning the minute she woke up. Despite her protests, Matthew sat behind her and held her hair back. He had Anna get her tea and insisted they call for the doctor.

"I'm not pregnant Matthew," she whispered. "We've gotten our hopes up before."

"Perhaps this time we will not be let down," he quipped but immediately had to return to helping his wife back to the bathroom.

They were late for the picnic, having not been dressed until it was rather late. They were shocked to see Cora had joined them and Isobel was telephoned as well.

"Mary my darling, you do not look well," Cora fretted.

"Perhaps we move to the shade," Isobel suggested.

"Mama," Bertie called. Mary ignored them and sat by her youngest son. "Mama, Baby!" This had shocked everyone, including Mary.

"No Bertie," Mary murmured. "Mama is not having a baby."

"Baby!" he said again and Matthew again insisted they have Dr. Clarkson come over. Mary refused. In fact, it took about two weeks of constantly getting sick in the morning and feeling tired, that had Mary convinced she needed to see him.

"Dr. Clarkson, is anything the matter?" Matthew asked as he suddenly met him coming down the stairs, having just come home from work.

"The opposite Mr. Crawley, I suggest you go to your wife," Clarkson hid his smile well as Matthew hurried upstairs into their room, but she was not there. He found her in the nursery, sitting on the floor playing with Bertie while Sybil and William played in the corner.

"You know my darling boy," Mary said softly. "You were right about Mama, Mama has a baby."

"Baby," Bertie giggled. "Mama." Bertie looked up. "Papa!" Mary gasped and whipped her head around to the door.

"Mary," he whispered hoarsely and she smiled at him, kissing Bertie on the head before rising to meet him.

"You were right," she sighed.

"I know how much it pains you to admit that," Matthew joked.

"Oh Matthew," she rolled her eyes and reached up to stroke his cheek with her thumb. "You know I love you so much. We are having another baby."

"We are," he smiled and leaned in to kiss her. They were interrupted by Sybil and William exclaiming, 'EW!'

"Ya know," Tom said from the door. "When Sybbie starts kissing boys, it's you two I'm blaming." And they all laughed, Tom having found out immediately that Mary was pregnant the second Bertie opened his mouth. But they didn't care.

I know this chapter is all over the place and you haven't even met Lily yet (or you might assume that you technically have, and you'd be right) but I wanted to provide a quick background to their family dynamic. They live at Downton, the boys have a nanny but Mary and Matthew (Matthew because he desperately wants to do things differently and Mary because she is a rather good mother) have a more proactive role in the children's life. They do not let the nanny do everything, they let them do just about everything but eat in the dining room because I doubt Robert, Cora, or Violet would ever allow that. And soon they are adding a girl in the mix.

Please let me know what you think!