Hey, Cinderella, just because you stay awake past midnight doesn't make that table turn into a bed, or those books into pillows. I gotta check out a thing. Pancakes and eggs in the fridge. Flip the switch coffee. Heating pad for your neck.

~S~P~N~

What thing? Why didn't you wake me up? And it wasn't midnight, it was – never mind. Falling asleep over a pile of books is a lot less physically demanding than most things we do. Yeah, okay, so my neck is stiff. Shut up. I'm taking a shower. When did you get praline pecan coffee creamer?

~S~P~N~

What do I gotta run everything past you? Or did you just miss me that much? Did you try the coffee creamer? I thought you liked that frou frou stuff. Naproxen on the nightstand. Heating pad for your neck.

~S~P~N~

If you're reading this, I'm back doing laundry. Where did you go this time? I was only taking a shower! I like the praline creamer. I never had it before. Was that pecans in the pancakes too? You missing New Orleans? Do I get to know what the thing is or what? I think I hope it's a washing machine from this millennium.

~S~P~N~

If you're reading this, I'm surprised. Laundry too much for you, Sleeping Beauty? I had to go back out to another store. Now, since there's nothing else to do, I'm going to go check our post office box. I wouldn't mind talking to you at least once today. And New Orleans has got a lot of great food. HEATING PAD FOR YOUR NECK.

~S~P~N~

If you'd stay home more than five minutes, you might talk to me today. I'm going back to lie down again. Yes. My neck hurts that bad. Shut. Up. Did you check out your thing you won't tell me about? WHAT heating pad?

~S~P~N~

What are you, nagging me? 'You're never home!' If you're reading this, and it's after 11:30am, I'm in the kitchen trying out an etouffe recipe I found. Anyway, can't you read? THE THING IS THE HEATING PAD I HAD TO GO TO TWO STORES TO FIND FOR YOUR NECK. Hello? I guess I AM the genius in the family.

~S~P~N~

If you're reading this, it means I'm not talking to you.

~S~P~N~

If you're still not talking to me, if you're reading this, it's because I'm holding it where you can read it while you're lying in bed with the heating pad under your neck. Would you like your lunch served in bed? Or can you make it to the table?

~S~P~N~

No, I'm still not talking to you. It smells good. I'll come out to the table.

Thanks for the heating pad.

Shut up.

~S~P~N~

;o)

The end.