Kakashi's fist hit the training post with a thud; the impact radiating up through his arm and into his body. He quickly followed it up with a swift kick; arching his hip to hit precisely where he wanted. It felt good to work his muscles again; he loved the feeling of having his body in motion; his heart pounding in his chest begging for a breather. His mind could finally go blank, allowing him to live I the moment. He would have done this well before now if it hadn't been for his injuries but they no longer plagued him. His side still ached with tightness when he pulled the stitches a little too hard; but that was the only thing. His sharingan didn't even both his as much. He kept it shut, endured the soothing balm Sakura insisted on and, as a result, he didn't even were a bandage any longer. Sakura disputed but allowed him his freedom.

Their relationship had taken a confusing turn as of late; he must admit. They weren't together officially but somehow Sakura would always end up in his bed in the morning. Kakashi would lay awake in the dark, anticipating that creek of the opening door and the dip in the mattress as she slid under the covers. He wouldn't hesitate to wrap his arm around her waist and draw her up against him; aching to feel her warmth. It became the best part of his day. He didn't initiate anything more than cuddling and neither did she. They would sleep together in the most PG sense and in the morning, she would leave without a word. He began to wonder if she was having second thoughts; or feeling guilty but whatever it was it didn't stop her from coming to him every night.

Having her in his arms made him sleep peacefully. He hadn't had one nightmare that week and he knew she was the reason. He didn't doubt for a moment. She had always been a port of haven to him in past and he was grateful even more so now. Although he wished he knew what she was thinking. The woman was a mystery to him even now and she called him hard to read. She climbed into his bed every night, had let him touch her but didn't smile at him like she used to. She was being professional with him; keeping that as a boundary between them with her locked up safe behind. It was a startling difference to the relationship they had once shared; void of the openness and ease that had once existed. That fact must be hurting her just as much as it was hurting him.

It's been a week since anything concerning Yamaguchi had been brought up around him. Tsunade was nice enough to keep him informed on the matter; regardless of his suspension. It put him on edge, this waiting business. Four years spent waiting to die could do that to a person but now that he was free all he wanted was action. The rogue-nin was playing with him, he knew that. Not because he was egotistical but because it was fact. Yamaguchi enjoyed his games and Kakashi was, unfortunately, a key player in them. He was anticipating a sign any day now. A sign in the form of a dead body sounded like Yamaguchi's style and he would everything in his power to stop that from Sakura. Yamaguchi knew of their relationship; laughed that the taboo subject of student and teacher, commended Kakashi on his taste once seeing a picture of the pink haired girl. Kakashi's stomach churned to remember the look on that man's face when he studied Sakura's.

He'd die before he allowed that bastard anywhere near her.

He punched the wooden pole a little harder and harder until he broke it in half. His lungs heaved for air; the sudden pain in his side telling his he managed to rip the wound open again. He pressed a hand to it; damn if he'd go to the hospital for such a petty thing but he was hesitant to go to Sakura. She'd be upset with him for pushing himself too hard. Plus she was working and so for him to visit her; he'd also have to visit the hospital.

He'd just sew it up himself, no harm done.

Leaving the training field, he wiped the sweat from his forehead off with the back of his arm. The air was chilly but the exercise had made his overheat so he'd taken off his sweater. The air felt good on his arms not covered from his t-shirt. He longed to wear his uniform again; felt naked without it. It had been al he used to wear and it gave his a stasis in this village; something to be proud of. Plus he wanted his own money again; not Tsunade's hand outs. His pride hurt to be dependent on something else. He hadn't had to rely on anyone but himself since his father died when he was very young. He wanted an apartment in his name again; barren as it had been last time he wanted somewhere to put his limited amount of stuff.

He wanted Sakura to live there. He wanted her toothbrush next to him; he wanted his kitchen counter cluttered with all her feminine things. He wanted to have her yell at him when he left his underwear on the floor. He wanted normality.

"Hi; stranger." A voice called to his left. He paused in the street, his hands in his pockets; sweater tucked under his arm.

Kakashi felt his eye curving with genuine happiness. "Good morning, Kurenai."

The beautiful raven haired woman returned the smile, balancing a healthy baby boy on her hip. "Where are you off to? Maybe we could catch up over some tea."

"Love to." Kakashi replied, walking up to her doorstep. Kurenai looked happy but tired; a look he'd seen on every mothers face, ever. Asuma must be on a mission; if she was here all alone. "Hey, there little guy." He chuckled, holding out a finger so a ting fist could wrap around it. He was strong, Kakashi mused; he'd make a fine shinobi when he grew up.

"This is Isamu." Kurenai smiled down at the baby with an astonishing expression of love. Kakashi had never known his mother but he hoped that he had been on the receiving end of such a look. "Please, come in."

Kakashi followed as Kurenai lead him into the apartment. "Sorry about the mess; I haven't had the time to clean." Kurenai apologized. Kakashi waved it off as nonsense, the place was not that bad; a few toys here and there, a laundry basket of unfolded clothing, nothing his apartment hadn't looked like in the day. Although he used to have a much different type of toy but that was beside the point.

Kakashi helped her in the kitchen; offering to make the tea so she could sit and rest her feet. Kurenai flashed him a grateful smile and folded herself into the chair. "You've been back for a while; are you staying at Sakura's place?"

"Genma's." Kakashi replied, reaching up into the highest cupboard where the Sarutobi family decided to keep the tea bags. Apparently in must be Asuma's idea to put them so high; from he remembered Kurenai didn't even like tea so it must work out. "But, I figure he'll be back soon so I'll have to go on the hunt for a place of my own." Though how he expected to pay for it was something he kept to himself.

"Have you been cleared for duty, yet?" Kurenai shifted Isamu to more comfortable spot. "I ask because you seem to be bleeding." She gestured to the red stain on the side of his shirt.

He shrugged nonchalantly. "It's nothing."

Kurenai made a noise to let him know she didn't believe him for a second, but knew enough, being a shinobi herself, to push the issue. Besides, having Asuma for a husband she'd have to deal with the same sort of thing.

When he heard that his two fellow jounin's had finally stopped the bullshit and tied the knot; he'd remembered feeling a mixture of happiness and jealousy. It seemed like all his old friends were getting married and settling down. If things had been different; chances are that he and Sakura would be also. She had asked him numerous times what he thought about marriage; hinting that she always dreamed about walking down the aisle. He had been torn between wanting to give it to her and his own self doubt and cold feet. He'd never really been witness to a happy marriage and was terrified that the binding would spoil what he and Sakura had.

He'd been stupid, he knew that now. He wasted so much time.

"How is Sakura?" Kurenai asked, taking a timid sip of her water. Kakashi refrained from rolling his eyes with exasperation; but just barely.

He slid into the chair across from her. "She's good; busy."

"She's chief in medicine, isn't she? Sorry, I haven't spoken with her in so long." Kurenai cupped the back of the baby's head and guided him down into her neck, when he showed signs of sleep. Kakashi watched the sight of mother and child with a strange sense of longing. He's never really put much thought into children of his own but, he could admit to himself now, that he wouldn't mind a son or daughter. A boy he could pass all his shinobi stills to; or a girl he'd bounce on his knee. Or maybe both. They'd have Sakura's fire and drive and his….well, to be honest he didn't know if had any redeeming qualities to pass onto the next generation besides for his jutsu.

"Asuma's on a mission?"Kakashi mumbled into his tea cup; hoping she didn't catch the abrupt change of subject.

"Yes," She replied. "He didn't want to go but with me on mat leave, we need the money. Times are hard now a days, Konoha's still recovering from the war."

"We always seem to be recovering from some attack or other. We're good at it."

"Yeah, let's hope it continues that way." Kurenai sighed.

They talked for a little while longer until Isamu began to fuss and she had to put him down for his nap. Kakashi had bid farewell and left. It had been nice to catch up with Kurenai; he had always liked the woman. Although she was so very different from Sakura in so many ways, he could see in both women the strength to carry on. Sakura could use a friend to talk to; besides Ino, who, to be honest still acted like she was 16. And he didn't want Sakura to become a recluse like he was. She was bright and funny; used to be a social butterfly. He wanted to see that spark back in her eyes.

That night; lying in bed with Sakura tucked up against him, he fought to go to sleep. It wasn't nightmares that plagued him but instead, regret. He couldn't get the image of Kurenai's happy family out of his mind. He suddenly realized just how lonely he was. Sakura was present but distant. They weren't at a place where he could show her all of his affections yet in fear it would chase her off. Just holding her at night felt heavenly but he knew it would come to a point where he would want more.

He already did.

His hand itched, restless to touch more than her hips. He wanted to lose himself inside her; could vividly remember what it felt like. He wanted that connection.

Sakura shifted in her sleep and he realized he had tightened his hold around her waist more tightly then he intended. He relaxed in arm and she sighed; burrowing her ass deeper into his groin. Kakashi barely contained the groan of pain/pleasure, squeezing his eyes shut.

Sakura ate her lunch in the park just down the street from the hospital. It was a nice change; albeit a little cold but she bundled tight against the weather; determined to get free air. Sitting at a bench, she unpacked her simple meal of white rice and beef soup. Plain but filling. She never really cared that much about food, eating only when she was hungry and small meats at that. Now that her stress level had descended somewhat, maybe she'd follow Kakashi's advice and gain some weight. She honestly hadn't noticed how thin she had gotten over these past years thinking her constant exhaustion was due to her work schedule. She hated cooking, rather liking when Kakashi used to take it upon himself to make all their meals. He was a good cook.

He was also a warm be partner. Sakura had somehow taken to sleeping with him each night; though she suppressed whether or not is was a good idea. It just felt too good being next to him. It almost felt like how it used to feel like; sharing an apartment, a bed. She knew he was awake when she left in the mornings and part of her wanted him to stop her; to force the conversation on where this relationship was going. But he would fake sleep and she would drag herself to work.

She hadn't partaken in any of the meetings involving Yamaguchi but Kakashi said there were not any new developments. She knew he felt useless; a shell of his former self but no matter how much she tried to assure him it would get better, he turned a deaf ear. She understood his frustration, being the Copy Ninja had been his life; his everything. Now he was suspended; earning no money, recovering from emotional and physical injuries; he didn't need Sakura screwing with him head on top of that. Every morning after a night spent in his arms, she'd wake up and fight a battle between guilt and happiness. The whole day, guilt won; it crippled her, but by evening all of that would be forgotten and she'd find herself back in the bed again.

It was harmless, she told herself; nothing more than innocent cuddling between two consenting adults. He never hinted to her that he was looking for anything more but he was a man, he had needs. Hell, she was in the same boat. It had rejuvenated her to get some release; days spent at the hospital were just a little less stressful. She even on occasion found herself smiling at patients or taking a coffee break with some of the girls. Things the younger Sakura would have done; before the bullshit of the past 4 years.

With a sigh, she decided that it was time to get back. She packed up her food and stuffed into her lunch bag. As she walked through the halls of the hospital, heading towards her office, Aiko stopped her. The girl had blood splatter all over the front of her uniform, and a linen towel in her hands which she used to wipe off the blood.

"Haruno-san; I just finished doing open heart surgery on Mr. Matsu. I wanted to tell you that everything went fine, I know he's a close friend to your family." Aiko replied; eyes bright with pride at her work but tired with the amount of energy used to achieve it.

"Yes, he was on my father's team back in the academy." Sakura could remember being held in the friendly man's arms as a youth. Mr. Matsu was always around for dinner and he even helped to train Sakura when he had a free moment. She had fond memories of the man and was happy to hear he was doing great. She'd make a note to stop by and see him later in the afternoon.

"Thank you, I'll be expecting your report by tonight." Aiko nodded her agreement and turned to head back down the hall.

What happened next was almost in slow motion. All that Sakura remembered was her eyes blinking once, twice and then an extremely loud BOOM destroyed her ear drums and a force the strength of a tsunami took hold of her body and flung it like a rag doll up clear off the ground and slamming her into the wall. Her world went black and she remembered nothing after that.