A/N: Okay, I realize I haven't updated in forever... I'm really sorry! I had to rework some things, because John and Merlin weren't getting any time to investigate in my pre-written chapters and the story was moving too fast. And then I had Girl Scout Camp... and homework... and cleaning... and I don't know. I have a ton of excuses, but basically, I'm sorry guys. I'll try not to do this again. (Although sadly I can't make any promises in this crazy life...) I am planning to write this story right up to the finish though so don't worry, I won't abandon it! Ahem. ANYHOW... This chapter is sort of strange. I was trying to make it funny, but I don't know, it was late at night, so sorry if it just sounds... weird. I think you'll be happy to know, however, that Merlin and John are going to get to have some awesome investigating before they get back to the flat to see what horrors will be the products of Sherlock's being sick. After all, they are sort eclipsed by his deductions in most of their investigations, so I think it will be nice for them to get a chance to contribute. Also, sorry for my obnoxiously long author's note. I know you just want to read the story. Thanks for all your feedback, and here's a special shout out to my guest reviewers, because I unfortunately cannot PM to thank you personally. But THANK YOU! I really appreciate it! Okay. Tell me what you think! :)

Merlin and John stared intently at the police public call box, each trying and spectacularly failing at making any deductions even somewhat worthy of the world's only consulting detective.

"Well…" Merlin said at last, with a weak little laugh, "It's blue…"

John sighed, shaking his head, "I just don't know how he does it! I mean… well… I do know how, but I just can't! When he explains his deductions, it sounds so easy! Even obvious, like he says! But trying to deduce for myself…"

Merlin nodded, "Oh, trust me! I know! I was the only child in our household who couldn't pull it off…"

John turned to him, surprised. Just trying to imagine a household of all three Holmes boys as children made his brain want to explode. (Their poor mother…) But now he was shocked to find that he had never actually considered what growing up with two geniuses like Mycroft and Sherlock would have been like for Merlin. "Sorry…" he said awkwardly, still a little bit shocked that Merlin had even told him anything more about his life when he was usually so private.

"Oh, don't be!" Merlin hurriedly assured him, "It's certainly not your fault! It's just, you know, it was hard. As a kid, I mean… When I was younger, I used to run around trying so hard to make deductions and then Sherlock would find me and just sort of laugh."

John snorted. That sounded like him.

Merlin suddenly grew very quiet, eyes slightly glazed over as he stared off into the distance at apparently nothing at all. "Sometimes I used to wonder if that was why she was never around. Because I was such a disappointment."

John blinked, once again shocked. "Sorry… who?" Does he mean his mother?

Merlin shook himself and looked up like he'd just noticed John was there, turning a little bit pink. "Oh… I uh, never mind. It hardly matters. Sorry to bother you with that, John."

John stared back at him, a little bit concerned. "No, it's quite alright."

Suddenly, his pocket buzzed.

Found anything? –SH

John sighed.

Not yet. –JW

"Sherlock?" Merlin guessed, knowingly.

John nodded. "He wants to know how the case is going." His mobile buzzed again.

I could come and help. –SH

John rolled his eyes. Typical Sherlock.

No, you could not. You are staying in bed, Sherlock. –JW

Bed, bed is boring. –SH

"He's trying to get out of staying in the flat, isn't he?" Merlin asked, smirking.

"Of course he is! It's Sherlock! But he's not getting away with it," John muttered, continuing to text his persistent flatmate.

Merlin nodded, "Good."

John –SH

John I'm bored –SH

John sighed and got back to typing out a reply.

Still no. –JW

I'll do whatever you want! –SH

John had to admit, that was almost tempting, but Sherlock needed his rest.

Sherlock, go back to bed. –JW

John, please! –SH

John snorted. As if!

I'm so bored! –SH

Nope. -JW

I'll do anything! –SH

Nope. –JW

I'll get milk! –SH

John stopped for a second, looking back over the message as if he couldn't believe his eyes. Which he couldn't. Sherlock never got the milk.

Did you say you'll get the milk? –JW

Yes. Obviously. I'll get the milk. Just let me leave this insufferable flat! –SH

John took a deep breath. I just hope we still have the flat when we get back…

Still no. Don't destroy anything valuable, okay? –JW

I may just, John. I'm awfully bored. –SH

Yes, you did say that. Several times, actually. –JW

THIS FLAT IS SO DULL! –SH

Way to branch out, Sherlock. Why don't you watch telly or something? –JW

Sherlock predictably ignored that suggestion.

You took longer to answer when I said I'd get milk. That means you considered it. –SH

"Unbelievable," John hissed in annoyance.

"What is?" Merlin asked, coming over to look over his shoulder.

My mobile was in my pocket and I was busy. –JW

Oh please. Like I can't tell the difference! –SH

Well, now you're definitely not leaving! –JW

John was just putting his mobile away in his pocket when it suddenly buzzed again.

What if I also get jam? –SH

John frowned. That was low. That was very low indeed.

"Don't give in John," Merlin warned him.

"But he's going to get jam, Merlin…" John whispered, staring uncomprehendingly at the little glowing screen.

"I can't believe you," Merlin sighed, throwing his hands up in the air in exasperation, "I'll get you a whole cartful of jam later! Just tell him no!"

John blinked and shook himself. What am I thinking? It's just… jam…

No and that's final. –JW

Bzzt! John looked one last time.

I hate you. –SH

John rolled his eyes and turned off his phone. Honestly! Sherlock could be such an overgrown child sometimes!

"So, Merlin," he began, "About that case… Clearly we are getting nothing from looking at this box. Where to now?"

Merlin shrugged. "I suppose we could check the inside," he suggested, frowning.

John winced, not exactly relishing the images his imagination conjured up of Sherlock's reaction to being told that his brother had been carried back in time to meet a live Lepidodendron. "Or… maybe not."

Merlin looked almost relieved. "Yeah… For some reason I don't exactly fancy looking in there either. But what do we do now, if not look in the box?" He didn't want to go home and have to tell Sherlock they hadn't found anything. This was his one chance to do some actual detective work without his brother breathing down his neck, telling him that everything he said was idiotic and wrong. This was going to be a productive day! He would be sure of it.

John shrugged. "I suppose we could interview some of the local residents."

Merlin nodded. "That could work. There are plenty of places to ask around, at any rate."

The box was in the middle of an alleyway of sorts, loosely surrounded by a plethora of flats on one side of the street and some tall shrubbery separating it from another wider open sort of street on the other. Although the entire area appeared rather run-down, deserted and littered with trash many of the flats had the lights on inside appeared to be in use.

"What I want to know," Merlin continued, "Is if you had a time machine that could take you anywhere, why would you stop here?"

"Now that," John said thoughtfully, "Is an excellent point."

"Well," Merlin said with a shrug, "I'd want to go to a place and time where something big and interesting was happening, wouldn't you? Or at least a place that doesn't smell like Arthur's dirty socks after practice…" He wrinkled his nose in distaste, shuddering at the memory.

John laughed. "Of course! And our two travelers don't appear to be the type to pass up some excitement. In fact, I do believe you've found a new lead!"

Merlin blinked in confusion. He hadn't been consciously thinking up a lead, just entertaining an interesting thought. "I… have? How? What sort of lead?"

"If we can find out what's drawing our travelers here then we can find them and solve the case!" John cried triumphantly.

Merlin nodded excitedly, flashing John a bright, goofy grin. "So if we ask around to find the what we can unravel the who and the why! Which hopefully will also get us the when and where too… Although that may prove difficult as time travel is involved… Maybe we should focus on how…"

John just stared at him shaking his head in befuddlement. How any sane person could manage to make less sense than Sherlock on one of his long winded technical explanations was beyond him. "Sorry… What?"

"Yes, exactly," Merlin confirmed, "First we need to find the what which will give us the who and the why."

"Wait… how?" John asked, still completely lost.

"No, no," Merlin corrected him, "How comes later."

John thought for a moment, and then frowned. "But won't we get that from who which we got from what?"

"What?" Merlin asked, now puzzled himself.

"Yes, what," John confirmed, "Which gives us why and how."

"Well what if who refuses to tell us how?" Merlin argued.

"By that logic they could withhold why," John pointed out, but then shook his head. "You know what?"

"Not yet," Merlin replied, grinning.

"This is pointless," John continued with a sigh, ignoring Merlin's comment, "Let's just go already."

"To find the what?" Merlin asked, enjoying the confusing conversation perhaps a bit too much.

John winced. "Let's not call it that."

Merlin laughed. "Okay then! Let's go find our big, interesting, time-travel worthy, murder attracting event, courtesy of the friendly neighborhood gossips!"

John giggled. "Come on Merlin, stop! We sound ridiculous! What if someone was listening?"

"They'd probably think we're mad," Merlin replied, matter-of-factly, "But okay. Good point. Let's go."

The two nodded to each-other, and after quickly setting up a plan to each interview every other flat going from opposite ends of the street so they didn't bother the same people twice, they set off to begin asking.