This is a very small, very scarce fandom. Has anyone watched "CLUE: The Movie" with Tim Curry? No? Then go watch it, he's fabulous as a butler.

Enjoy!

-Goldie

This was to be an interesting night. I ring the doorbell, and the noise echoes throughout the mansion. Then, two mean-looking dogs appeared from the side of the house, barking all kinds of things at me. I pale at the sight, when the door swings open to reveal a well-dressed butler with fair brown hair. "Oh, you must be Mr. Green."

"Yes. And you?" the hounds start their infuriating barking again. The butler glares at the dogs with an intimidating face, making me a bit nervous. "SIT!"

He says it with such ferocity, it compels me to sit down as well. That causes the butler to look at me oddly and smile "No, not you sir." I quickly stand back up, embarrassed; right. The dogs were told to sit, not me. He leads me inside, my blush barely fading.

"I am known as Wadsworth…for tonight."

I almost forgot! I'll need to use my pseudonym given to me. It seems very unnecessary, but I don't mind. I actually like mine.

Mr. Green.

Mr. Green.

Mr. Green.

Doesn't roll of the tongue perfectly, but it has a nice ring to it. Wadsworth leads me to the library, where some other guests were waiting. There, I met a "Ms. White", a "Colonel Mustard", Yvette the maid, and a "Mrs. Peacock". All strange people, yes, bit company nonetheless. We attempted to make light talk to pass the time, but it ended up tapering off awkwardly. When the rest of the invitees arrived ("Miss Scarlet" and "Professor Plum'), Wadsworth comes back. A gong was struck, causing me to jump-and splashing my drink all over poor Mrs. Peacock! Cleaning it off, I apologize profusely and explained my high-strung tendencies. I hear someone snicker lightly, so I casually look around to see who it was…did the butler just laugh at me? With a glimmer in his stare, he leads us to the kitchen for supper. For the chief, I have to keep to my alibi as of why I'm being blackmailed. I just wish it could've been something else; because it will be humiliating to say that I work for the government and I'm gay. However false it may be, it still embarrasses me. I know the chief got a kick out of it though…try to act as normal as a homo can be. Yeesh, I hope I'm convincing. While eating amongst silence, Peacock tries to start a conversation with the guests. It failed admirably; at least, until she arrived at the topic of actual identities, which I couldn't help but enter.

"…it's very easy when you're the wife of a….oh wait, we can't reveal anything about ourselves. Though heaven-to-Betsy I don't know why."

I look up, grinning madly "I know who you are."

She glared towards me and blanched "What?"

"I work in Washington, too."

Oh, does she freak! I am very amused about her reaction. We continue to bring the others in the conversation, so to know if they, too, worked with (or at least near) the government. And that was just about everyone. As we find out, though, a crash of thunder shakes the house. MY accident-prone self splashes some of my soup onto another—this time on Miss Scarlet! I tried to clean it up, but she didn't dare let me touch her. Once the commotion died down, everyone continued to ask questions to Wadsworth, delivering food whilst answering. Then, someone asked "So, if the seventh guest isn't our host, who is?" He looks up at each of us in turn and laughs huskily, not answering the question. I slightly shudder at the noise (well, I guess playing the part isn't as hard as I thought). A shrill sound echoes around the house-someone was at the door! It was the 7th and final guest, Mr. Boddy. Or, at least, Wadsworth had introduced him as such. It must've been a long drive, so his loss of appetite comes as a surprise to me. The butler clasps his hands together, "Well! Can I interest any of you in fruit or dessert?" No one responds.

Timidly, I raise my hand.

"…do you have any strawberries?"

All eyes are on me. Geez, if things weren't awkward enough already… the butler was the only one who didn't look at me like I was crazy. In fact, he smiled warmly and replied "Of course, sir. They are your favorite fruit after all." Wadsworth grins to himself, as if he made a little joke. "Everyone should head to the study, seeing as you are all finished with dinner. I will be there in a moment." We all stand up and follow Yvette to the study across the hall. Making myself comfortable, I sit on a couch, Mr. Plum deciding to join me. Yvette came around and served brandy while Plum, Scarlet, and Peacock have a casual smoke. Finally, Wadsworth walked in past Mr. Boddy and handed me my strawberries in a nice, shiny bowl-covered in whipping cream. Well, that's very nice of him. "Here are your strawberries." I took the bowl and smiled "Thanks." Smiling back, he approaches the desk and opened an envelope to read its contents. Finished, he addresses the guests "Ladies and gentlemen. You each have one thing in common with each other: you are all being blackmailed! You pay what you can afford-and sometimes more-to a person threatening to tell your secrets, but you have no idea who it could be!"