I was bored so I thought I'd write a fanfic about the United States of America.

Summary: The nations all know that America is loud, obnoxious, and ignorant but what they don't know is that he's a dad. A dad to 50 states.

Rated T because of language, minor themes, and some (comedic) violence.

Disclaimer: I do not own Hetalia.

EDIT FOR PAST READERS: The chapters have been edited for a few grammar mistakes and I've gotten rid of Germany's and France's accents.

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His day had been going fine. Key word "had". He had been dozing off during a World Conference when things had started going south. There was a loud pounding and then the unthinkable happened (at least in his opinion).

A loud voice that America could recognize anywhere screamed, "DAAAAAAAADDDDDYYY!" That woke him up.

The person continued to pound on the door until an obviously irritated Germany opened the door. America's jaw nearly hit the ground. Standing in the doorway was little girl no older than 6. She had tan skin, almond-shaped brown eyes, and long black hair. She was wearing a puffy, floor-length pale blue coat and her ears were covered by earmuffs. She looked up at Germany and pouted.

"Where's Daddy?" She asked. Germany glared at the little girl.

"I do not know who 'Vati' is." Germany replied. The little girl looked confused.

"You sound funny."

"No, you sound funny." The little girl seemed to not like this response and kicked Germany in the shin. He let out a grunt of pain.

America stood up and said, "Daddy's right here." Most of the countries' jaws dropped. England fell back in his chair. No one seemed too eager to help him up. The little girl screeched and ran to him. He picked her up and they both laughed. Their laughs were identical. Ignoring the shell-shocked nations, America asked the little girl, "What are you doing here, Las?"

"No one was paying attention to me so I took Tony's spaceship-thingy and went looking for you." The little girl began playing with her father's coat collar. He sighed. This had never happened before. Out of all fifty, this little girl had to be the first one to be seen by the other nations.

"Natasha, it's not nice to take other people's things, even if they aren't people." America whispered in her ear. He almost never used the States' human names. Almost.

"Yeah, but even Tony wasn't paying attention to me so I took his spaceship-thingy."

"But-" He was cutoff by someone loudly clearing their throat. It was Germany. He gave America an accusing look. By now most countries had gotten over their initial shock and was now giving America questioning looks. England had managed to help himself off the ground but still looked shocked.

"Care to explain, amigo?" Said Spain. He gave America a sympathetic look.

"Um, sure, dudes. Well, you see this is-" Once again, he was cutoff by someone. This time it was his daughter.

"I'm Natasha Jones aka Alaska! The second to last state to join the Union! Older sister to Hawaii, younger sister to everybody else!" The girl smiled proudly. Her smile was a carbon-copy of her father's. "And I'm Daddy's 49th child!" The last statement made England fall back in his chair again.

"49th child? America, mon ami, you have been a very busy boy." France said with a sly grin and a raised eyebrow.

"It's not like that, dudes." America said in his own defense.

"Please. Enlighten me. 'Ow is it?"

"Man, it's pretty hard to explain but I'll try. Okay, so every time a new state joined the union, a new kid showed up. Sometimes it's hard to find them, sometimes it isn't. There are fifty states so there are fifty kids. They aren't blood related but it doesn't matter. I still consider them my kids and they consider me their father." There was a dangerous edge in his voice. As if he was daring anyone to say different.

"And why 'ave you not told us about 'zem before?"

"I'm very, very protective of them. I don't need any of you bothering them." His tone still had the dangerous edge. Not many had ever seen America get like this.

"Daddy!" Alaska shouted while tugging on her father's coat collar.

"What?"

"I gotta go potty."

"That makes two of us, dude."

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America left almost immediately after agreeing to have to go potty. He didn't really care that the meeting was over. He knew that Alaska would eventually repeat something she heard America say and well… all the things he said weren't exactly positive. She had a big mouth; it wasn't her fault, she inherited it from her father. In fact, most of the states had big mouths. Speaking of the other states….

"Kids!" America shouted as he entered his large mansion. He put Alaska down and she immediately ran in the direction of the bathroom. Oh yeah, he had to go to the potty too.

"Dad, Mount Kilauea has erupted!" Shouted a voice America recognized as Delaware's. The oldest of the children. He came rushing down the stairs holding a tan baby. He held the baby out in front of him as if the baby had some strange disease he didn't want to catch. Delaware (his human name was Jasper Jones) had short blonde hair and bright blue eyes. He was the spitting image of his father (but most of the children were) minus the glasses.

"The actual volcano or your sister?" America asked. It was rhetorical question.

"Which one do you think?" Delaware asked sarcastically, standing next to his father. Delaware also wasn't nearly as tall as his father.

"I don't know. That's why I'm asking you, dude."

"Lilica, Dad. It's Lilica." Delaware shoved the baby into America's hands and made a run for it. Smart boy. The reason they called Lilica "Mount Kilauea" was because when she had to use the potty, she erupted like the famous volcano that resided on one of Hawaii's islands. Lilica was Hawaii so it all fit. America really didn't want to change a diaper. Besides, he really had to use the potty now.

"Virginia?" America called out.

"Yeah, Dad?" Said a voice behind him. America jumped and turned around. It was Virginia. She had a very bad habit of sneaking up on people. Mimicking Delaware, he shoved Hawaii into Virginia's hands.

"Can you change Mount Kilauea?"

"Fine."

"Thank you." And on that note, he ran to the bathroom to go potty.

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England wasn't even paying attention to what the other countries were arguing about. He was still too shocked to notice anything. America had 50 children. That meant England was an uncle to 50 nieces and nephews. Well…. at least in his mind he was. He'd never say anything like that out loud and America would probably beat him to a pulp if he said anything like that. 50 kids. It was hard to believe that America could even raise a sack of potatoes but 50 kids? It was impossible…. But that little girl's laugh and smile were identical to America's. Then again, she didn't look like him physically… but her whole demeanor reminded England of America. He finally shook himself out of his faze and began to actually hear what the countries were arguing about.

"I think it's best we investigate the issue!" Germany shouted.

"Si, I know what you think! But what you think and what is right are two completely different things!" Spain replied/shouted.

"Tell me vat is so wrong vis it?"

"First of all, it would be invading his privacy. Second of all, if you had any ninos (AN: I apologize for not using accents but my computer is really old and it won't let me translate anything.) of your own then perhaps you'd understand what it's like trying to protect them from the big, bad world."

"Ven did you decide to start caring about that idiot?"

"I don't. But I know what it feels like to have to try and protect your children and failing." Spain looked sheepishly at Mexico. England leaned a little to his right and whispered to France, "What are they fighting about?"

France wriggled his eyebrows and said, "So eager to invade mon personal space. England rolled his eyes and France scoffed. "Fine. 'Zey are arguing about whether or not we should investigate America's children."

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Cliffhanger! I hate those! Anyways, let me if this story is complete crap or not. You can do that by reviewing so go ahead and do that! Thank ya'll so much!