Disclaimer: I don't own Sons of Anarchy or any of the characters in the show. It's the property of Kurt Sutter, Sutter Ink and FX.

I've come to realize today that Valentine's Day is a much bigger thing in the US than here so... Happy Valentine to all of you! Hope you're having a great day.

Again, my brain lacks that off button so I wrote this story as well but wanted to wait until I was done with "Give it a Day" before I started publishing it. But now I though, what the heck, I'm far ahead on both this one and "Far Gone & Out" so it shouldn't be a problem. And so you know, there will eventually be a OFC / Son hook up in this.

The chapters in this one is named after poems by Rabindranath Tagor.

And just as she is on "Far Gone & Out", Simone Santos has been an amazing support, so thank you once again. You Rock, Girl!

Pics of the OC's will be up on my profile shortly. This story takes place a few years before season 1.

1. Distant Time

I know not from what distant time
thou art ever coming nearer to meet me.
Thy sun and stars can never keep thee hidden from me for aye.

-o0o-

Catherine took the ice pack Rodney was handing her and pressed it against her cheek. She looked at the two cops who were standing in the middle of the room, overviewing the mess. It had been obvious to her pretty damn fast that they hadn't sent the sharpest knives in the box when they knocked on the broken down door and asked if they'd come to the right place.

"So your sister attacked you?"

"Yes, like I've told you three times already."

"What's missing?" the other one said.

"My TV, stereo, microwave," she looked around. "Probably some jewellery but I haven't had time to go through that yet. Might be some other stuff as well."

"Do you have any valuable jewellery?"

"No." Catherine didn't want stuff like that. Whenever she got some, she sold it. Money was her thing.

"Was it just your sister?" the first one said.

"No, she had some guy with her, probably her boyfriend."

"But you're not sure he was her boyfriend?"

"As I'm sure you've guessed, we're not close and she didn't exactly introduce him before she had him kick my ass. She's a crack head and it's not the first time she's stolen stuff from me. I stopped letting her in years ago since she always ended up stealing some shit and disappearing."

"And Rodney here is...?"

"A co-worker."

When she looked over at him he smiled and she knew they were thinking the same thing and he shook her head to make sure she shut up.

"And you called him because?"

Catherine was wondering what the fuck this was about and why they gave a shit why she called him; but she played nice and answered their questions.

"He lives close, I was scared that she'd come back and I knew it might take you quite some time to get your asses here, so I called him." She pointed at Rodney. "Since he's a big guy, as you can see."

Both cops looked at the 6'4" black guy who was standing in the kitchen area with his arms crossed, and nodded in agreement.

"When did you get home?"

"Two thirty," she answered and walked over to the fridge to get something to drink.

"AM?"

Jesus fucking Christ they sure didn't send the smart cops to her place. "Yes. Like I said earlier, I came home about three hours ago, at two thirty AM."

It had taken the cops more than two hours to get to her place, luckily Rodney had an understanding wife so she was ok with him being at Catherine's place. She'd even come over with some coffee for them.

"Okay, we'll look into this," they looked at the broken door. "Maybe you should stay at a motel tonight."

"Sure," she said and followed them to the door. When they were finally out she turned to Rodney. "Thanks for coming here."

"No problem," Rodney said and came over to look at the door. "I'll get that taken care of tomorrow. Got some place to stay? You're welcome at our house..."

"No offense, I love you, but seriously, you have three screaming kids."

"Yeah," Rodney said with a laugh. "When's Jenny back?"

Jenny was another co-worker and friend.

"Next weekend." Catherine looked around at the mess. "I'll go to a motel or something."

"Not like you're gonna be able to work with those bruises. Think you need to go to the hospital."

"No. No way. I'm fine. I've had worse." She didn't want to pay for a hospital visit either. It was okay, it hurt but not too bad.

"Don't you have some place to go and wind down for a while?"

She thought about it and she was suddenly so tired. Catherine was the youngest of the siblings, apart from the sister who had just robbed and beaten her up she had two brothers. The oldest brother, eight years older than her, was a psychopath, at least that's what she thought. The six years older brother, Matthew, had been her lifeline as a child. He'd been her everything. The three years older sister had been a cunt even as a kid.

But she wanted someone, just for a while, to give a shit about her. Someone else than Rodney, someone who was family and the only one in her family who could do that was Matthew.

"Got my brother in Charming."

"Charming? Sounds like a calm place," Rodney said with a laugh. "I'm gonna go and get us some breakfast and make some calls to get this place locked up. Pack your bags and then you'll leave once you've had something to eat and shit loads of coffee."

"Yeah."

Catherine wasn't too worried about the lack of sleep. One night without it wasn't a problem. She heard Rodney leave and looked around the place. The ice pack was starting to melt so she threw it into the sink and went to find a bag and a suitcase.

-o0o-

She stopped along the side of the road three times on her way to Charming, wondering what the fuck she was doing. Two of the times she considered calling Matt but decided not to. He was her brother and she needed him at the moment.

When she finally reached Charming after a five hour ride she stopped at a gas station. While paying she looked at the cashier.

"Where's the Teller Morrow Garage?"

The girl looked like her as if she was an alien, like it was obvious where the garage was. "The SOA clubhouse?"

"Yeah." She might not now much about her brother anymore but she knew he was a biker in The Sons Of Anarchy and that the clubhouse and the garage was at the same place. "The clubhouse."

"Just down the road, on the left side, can't miss it."

"Thanks."

Catherine's ribs hurt like a motherfucker and so did her face. It had progressively worsened during the ride and she hoped that Matt was there with her being there 'cause there was no way in hell she'd be able to drive back home in the next couple of days.

She knew she probably looked like shit but she didn't have the energy to care at the moment. Once she pulled up in front of the garage she started to really regret the decision to go to her brother. She wasn't even sure if he was here. He'd just mentioned that he worked at the garage owned by the club's president.

At the moment she was short on options though. Not even mentioning she was scared to be at home. Rodney had been right, she needed to get out of LA for a while and since it was summer vacation from school she didn't really have any place she needed to be.

She almost chickened out when she noticed the people sitting outside the clubhouse. The urge to just start the car, turn it around and get the hell out of there made her almost shake when she tried to force her body out of the car. Finally she took a deep breath and pulled the handle.

She cringed a bit when she walked and she noticed them all turn around and look at her. Matthew had never taken her to the club. In fact; Matthew had hardly talked to her at all the last two years. Last Christmas he even bailed on her for the club. She'd spent the fucking day working along with all the other pathetic wankers; but at the moment her brother was her best bet, there was no one else to ask.

A blond walked up to meet her.

"Can I help you darlin'?"

It took her a few seconds 'cause, apart from at the strip clubs, no guy her own age had ever called her darlin'.

"I'm looking for Matthew," she finally managed to say.

"Is he expecting you?"

She almost laughed. "No, he's not." The ribs hurt when she huffed and she grabbed her side. She noticed the guy eyeing her. "I'm his sister. I just need to talk to him."

"Okay," he said when he obviously decided to half believe that she really was Matt's sister. "I'll take you to him."

He pointed at a door and she walked towards it with him behind her. As they reached it he walked around her to hold it open.

"Pinch!" he yelled. "Someone here to see you."

"Who?" she heard her brother's voice and when she came further in she saw him get out of a couch and walk towards her. When he saw her he halted. "What the fuck happened to you?"

"Our crack head whore of a sister and her crack head boyfriend payed me a visit."

He came up to her and held her chin to tilt her head towards the light. "Fuck! What happened?"

"They raided my place." She took a deep breath.

"What did they take?" he said and let go of her chin.

Catherine couldn't help but feel... empty. This was his greeting? Cold. Not a hug or a smile or... anything? They used to be so close. It was the two of them against the rest of their fucked up family. She had no idea what happened but suddenly she was the only one calling, the calls got shorter and shorter, he never had time for her. The last nail in the coffin was when he stood her up on Christmas Day. She'd never felt more alone. He didn't even bother to call, just sent her a text that he'd spend it with the club.

"Just stuff."

"Money?"

"Just today's tip. I don't keep money in the apartment," she sighed. This wasn't going the way she had hoped. At all, and she was feeling damn uncomfortable.

"Where the fuck do you keep your money then?"

"Gee, I don't know. The bank?" He was starting to royally piss her off. He was still standing more than an arms length away and he looked at her as if she was a puppy who'd followed him home. A dog he thought was cute but didn't really want. "Between our crackhead sister and psychopath brother I figured that was the safest place."

He finally smiled but kept quiet.

"I need a place to crash. Just for a few days until I get a new lock on the door."

"Fuck, Cat. I only have a studio apartment."

"No matter what size it is, you spend most nights here anyway," a tall guy with curly black hair and blue eyes said.

"Don't you have work?" he tried instead, ignoring the guy's comment.

She couldn't fucking believe him! "I can't work with bruises." With another sigh she swallowed what little pride she still had. "Please, Matt. I just need a few days outside LA."

Matt seemed to have missed her plea and instead he looked pissed. "Why the fuck can't you wait tables with bruises?" Catherine looked down at the floor and back up at him. "Jesus fucking Christ tell me you're not stripping again."

Instead of being embarrassed she got pissed. Her sister had raided her place and beat her up and her brother was giving her shit for stripping although she'd stopped being embarrassed about her job years ago. Besides, what the fuck did he expect her to do?

Between all those thoughts going through her head she landed at the easiest one. It wasn't like she couldn't afford a motel for a while, she could work extra shifts once the bruises were gone and she'd still be able to pay the tuition, without a problem. She realized that this, coming to Matt, had just been about... fuck... getting some pity. Like she needed it from this piece of shit.

"Fuck this!" she said and turned around.

"Hey!" he yelled behind her and grabbed her arm. "Why, Cat?"

"Are you shitting me?" She stared at him in disbelief. "I have no fucking idea why I came here. I ask for your help and you're giving me shit about how I pay my way through school. It's not like I'd get help from someone else to do it."

He was still holding on to her arm and he practically yelled in her face. "I know you're a fucking genius but I have a hard time seeing how it's worth spreading your legs for a few bucks just so you can study math at college."

She stared at him, lost for words and she felt her eyes tearing up. It was hard to tell which betrayal from a sibling felt worst. She was used to her sister being an ass but Matt... He used to be her other half and it was painfully obvious that he didn't know shit about her anymore. He let go of her arm when he noticed her tears and she turned around to walk out, she couldn't take more.

"Shit... Cat..." She heard behind her and that's when she, for the thousandth time in her life, felt the need for him to not think bad things about her. All she wanted to do was to set him straight before she left.

"I've never done either of those two things," she said with a tired voice as she dried her cheek.

"What?"

"I've never had sex with a guy for money and I've never studied math at university."

"You dropped out?" He still didn't get it.

"No. But I'm studying physics. I've done that from day one." She turned around and started walking outside again. "See you next Christmas." She turned around with a smile, snapped her fingers and pointed at him. "My bad! We don't celebrate Christmas together anymore. Guess I'll see you when I see you."

She hurried out to get to her car before she lost it properly. The lump in her throat was thick and she felt like curling up underneath a cover and just bawling her eyes out. She really hoped there was a motel or a bar close to this place because she wouldn't be able to drive very far and she'd take either of the two. A night without sleep wasn't much of a problem but she probably should stay away from the high way just in case.

-o0o-

Two whiskeys and a beer later she was finally calming down. It had been a stupid idea to begin with but she'd felt the need for him just this once. At least she knew where they stood and she needed to come to terms with not having a brother either. She didn't count the other brother or sisters since a long time.

She waved with the glass to the bartender.

"Any motels close by?"

"Sure. Continue down the street, take the first turn to the left and there's one on the right hand side."

"Thanks." She felt the tears again so she grabbed her beer and glass to go find a table. As she sat down she leaned her head against the wall behind her and closed her eyes. Someone grabbed a chair next to her and sat down, but she didn't bother to open her eyes. "I'm not looking for company."

"Doubt you'd get any with that swollen face." She opened her eyes and saw her brother next to her. He took her glass. "I'm sorry, sis. You caught me off guard."

"Don't bother," she said and took the glass back from him. "I'll manage. Go back to your family."

He watched her down the drink in silence. "Take my place. I'll stay at the clubhouse and if you want I'll stay out of your way."

What the fuck was he talking about? She wasn't the one who had wanted him to stay away. She'd tried to keep in touch but when she'd started to feel like a crazy stalker she gave up.

"I'm fine. You don't have to start worrying about me all of a sudden."

"Cat, I know I haven't been there for you lately but..."

She didn't want to hear any pathetic excuses so she interrupted him. "That was the understatement of the century, don't you think?"

Throwing some bills on the table she got up. She wanted to get away from him before she started to cry again.

"Sis, come on."

Catherine hurried her steps, but when the sun blinded her she stopped for a few seconds. Once her eyes adapted she saw four bikers waiting outside. One of them was the blond who'd showed her inside the clubhouse, another was the one who had pointed out that Matt never slept at his place. There was also a guy with big scars on his cheeks and a fat guy. She hurried past them to her car and heard her brother behind her again.

"Catherine Marie Bishop! Don't get into that fucking car!"

She didn't stop and then he grabbed her arm again.

"What do you want from me? It was pretty fucking obvious that you didn't want me in your studio apartment and that's fine. I can take care of myself."

"Then why the fuck did you come here?"

That shut her up and to her horror she felt the tears in her eyes. With a quick side glance to the other guys she looked up at Matt. He looked different since the last time she saw him.

Her big brother was tall, more than a head taller than her. His blond hair was longer now, it had always been darker than hers, it was slicked back, and he had a beard. It surprised her that it was a bit red. She finally looked into those eyes that were the exact same color as hers, blue almost green. They were the only two ones in the family with blue eyes and Matt used to joke that it was a sign that they were the only two sane persons living in that hellhole.

She dried her cheeks. "I don't know," she mumbled.

He shoved a key into her hand. "Get into you car and follow me."

"Matt... forget it."

"No! You have my only key now so don't try to take off."

She got into her car and watched him get up on his bike. As he pulled out of the parking lot she followed him. The other bikes drove off in the other direction. When Matt stopped, she parked, took her bags and when she opened the door, Matt was just outside it.

"That all you brought?"

"Suitcase in the back." She nodded towards the trunk and he went for it.

Catherine turned and looked at the house. It looked like any other place but it wasn't a dump. "So you live in a studio apartment?"

"No," he said and when she turned around he smiled. "I lied. You'll see why."

She followed behind him up the stairs and watched his broad back. Her big brother was really a big brother and she used to love that. He was six years older than her and he used to pick her up at school. Everyone at her school knew that the cool big guy with a Harley was her brother. He smiled when she came running and clapped the bitch seat for her to climb up. With her arms around him she pressed her cheek between his shoulders and closed her eyes. Even on a bike, going fast, she felt totally safe when she was with him.

He halted by the door, put the key in the lock and just as he was about to turn it he turned to her and smiled again, "Brace yourself, sis."

"Are you keeping women tied to your bed or something?"

"Nope," he opened the door and when she looked inside she took a deep breath.

"Jesus fucking Christ!" She stepped over the threshold and then she laughed. The place was a mess, beer cans, bottles and just... shit, all over the place. "Damn. My place got raided and it looks better than this."

"Had a party here last night."

"Really? I couldn't tell."

"That's why I didn't want you here."

She kept looking around. It wasn't the whole truth and she knew it but at the moment she would let him get away with it. "I though you guys partied at the clubhouse."

"Yeah. I was gonna get some sleep and some of them followed here." When she turned around he was just behind her and finally put his arms around her. "I'll get someone to clean it up. I'll help you with the guest room."

"You have a guest room?"

"Yeah. We'll clean it though. Pretty sure there were some major action in there last night."

She leaned her head into his chest and he hugged her harder. When his hand went up to the back of her head she put her arms around his waist and hugged him back. He gave her forehead a kiss as he let go and took her hand to take her further inside.

The guest room looked like shit. It was bad and it had seen some serious action. Catherine didn't even want to try to count the number of condoms.

Matt picked up a phone. "Hey, need you at my place for a clean up." He stood silently and looked around. "Bring two croweaters as well. They're at least part guilty of this shit."

"Croweaters?" Catherine asked when he'd hung up.

"Groupies." He picked up her suitcase and put it on a chair in the guest room. "Hungry?"

"Yeah, I can eat."

"I'll buy you some food while they clean up this place."

They sat down on the stairs outside and had a smoke while they waited for whoever was coming. A van pulled up and a guy with a mohawk and three girls jumped out of it. Matt stood up when they came up the stairs.

The guy gave her a big smile and Matt smacked him in the back of the head. "Eyes off! I'm taking her out for dinner and I want you to make sure the place is spotless by the time I get back."

"Sure thing!" Mohawk said with an eager smile. "I'll take care of it."

As he passed, the guy gave her another eye and Matt immediately hit the back of his head again. "Eyes, motherfucker!"

When he was gone Catherine looked at Matt. "Can you really blame him? I look like I've been through a meat grinder."

"Not why he was looking and you don't look like you've been through a meat grinder. It's just a bruise on the jaw, cracked lip and a red nose." Catherine realized that she hadn't actually looked into a mirror. She'd just assumed that she looked like shit since her face hurt like hell. "Have you seen a doctor?"

"No. I'm sure it's fine and I don't want to spend money on someone telling me it's fine."

"I'll take you to see Chibs before we eat."

"Who's Chibs?"

"A guy at the club. Knows basic medicine. He can at least tell me if I should take you to a doctor."

She shrugged, if it was free she wouldn't object. When they came down the stairs she walked to the car and he once again stopped her by taking her arm.

"Where do you think you're going?" he said with a smile.

"The car?"

"Forget it. You're getting a ride." He took her to the bike and handed her his helmet.

"What are you going to wear?"

"Just get up behind me and stop nagging." He laughed when he saw her in the much too big helmet. "Besides, you're the one with the brain worth protecting."