My Love Is Eternal

by MInstrel164

Kate opened her eyes and greeted the new day with a small yawn. The sun yet to rise but she had always woken before sunrise. It was a legacy of her long years spent as a homicide detective and a mother raising children. It was a habit that she had not been able to break. For some minutes she lay there not moving just staring up at the ceiling as if she was summoning her shield of armour or waiting until the wall was built around her so that she could face the new day.

As the last vestiges of sleep left her, Kate could feel the return of the dull and constant heartache. She knew that this pain would never leave her. To most of the world she presented a face of someone who had come to terms with what had happened and was slowly getting on with life. But only her family and closest of friends knew the truth.

Rubbing the sleep from her eyes Kate turned her head and stared at the empty side of the bed. There had been nights where she had cursed him for leaving her. There were nights when she smiled remembering all the happy memories they had created together. And some nights, too many nights, when the pain was unbearable she would curl herself around his favourite pillow, close her eyes and pretend that he was in her arms just like they had spent countless nights over the years.

He had been gone six months now. She had thought the pain of losing her mother which she had carried for so many years had been unbearable but she had realised very quickly it was nothing compared to the pain she had been enduring these past long six months. Of losing him.

On this morning, on this day she felt the pain even more. For some minutes she lay there contemplating pulling the blankets over her head and go back to sleep and not wake up until this day has passed. But she knew that she can't do that. There is no way her family would let her do that.

Kate let out a long sigh and then threw aside the blankets. She swung her legs out of bed and slipped her feet into the fluffy bunny rabbit slippers. He had gotten them for her a couple of years ago when she had remarked her feet were cold in the mornings. Yes, they looked ridiculous and she looked ridiculous in them and her children and grandchildren made fun of them but they were very warm and that is what mattered, that and that he had bought them for her.

She reached over for her robe which she had left at the end of the bed. Slowly she pushed her arms through the sleeves. Rising up from the bed some of her bones popped in protest at being forced into motion. Some of her joints too ached more so during these cold mornings. It was an unsubtle reminder that she was getting old.

She shivered at the cold of the bedroom and made a note to herself to turn up the thermostat to warm up the loft. She belted up her robe and shuffled out of the bedroom. Kate walked through the darkened office, her destination being the kitchen. Even after all these years Kate could not function properly without a shot of caffeine in her system in the morning.

Kate headed into the kitchen. She turned up the lights and then moved to the espresso machine and started it up.

For a moment she regarded the machine and could not help but smile. He had bought it for her birthday ten years ago. Kate had never been one for big fancy presents from him but every now and then she would accept the fancy and expensive present he bought her because she loved to see the smile on his face on seeing her reaction. The espresso machine had been one of those kinds of presents. Though the way he had put it was for his self preservation because he would not dare deprive her of her constant supply of caffeine. It had been a love hate relationship with that machine at first but eventually she had managed to get the hang of working the damned thing.

Shaking off her reveries she moved over to a cupboard and pulled out a large blue coffee mug emblazoned with the logo of the New York Police Department. It was her favourite mug. A few minutes later she had filled the mug. Picking it up she carried back to the office.

The office had changed considerably over the years. It had once reflected his tastes and personality but over the years that had changed to reflect both their tastes and personalities. One thing that had never changed were countless books that stocked the bookshelves around the office.

Kate set the mug on the small coffee table by the couch situated near the window and walked over to the desk. From the desk she picked up the very old hardback copy of Heat Wave. The dustjacket was frayed in some parts and had been repaired with tape in others and the pages were starting to yellow a little with age and they were well thumbed. Taking the book she walked to the couch by the window.

Sitting down Kate gazed out the window and watched as the snow fell past the window. This was one of her favourite parts of the loft. There had been many times she had sat here on the couch just gazing out the window deep in thought. Turning her gaze from the window she turned attention to the book she held in her hands. She settled herself until she was comfortable and then started to open the book.

Heat Wave had been his first love letter to her. She had read this book too many times to count and truly she could recite it from memory if she had to. Yet she would read the book on Valentine's day like she had been doing for the past twenty or more years. It had become one of her traditions.

Opening the book to the dedication page Kate smiled at the words he had written. Even now her heart would somersault just like it had done that night at the book launch party when she had first read the dedication. Soon Kate lost herself in the pages of the book letting the words, his words, to sooth her pain, to lift her from the depths she had fallen. Like he had always done.

Some hours later Kate finished the last page and then slowly closed the book. She remained silent for a few moments a soft smile on her face. Best love letter ever, she thought to herself.

The smile on her face vanished when Kate heard some noise coming from the kitchen. Kate suddenly became animated. She set the book on the coffee table and rose from the couch. She winced at the various outbreaks of pain from parts of her body. She ignored the pain as she headed out of the office.

Out of habit Kate's hand moved to her hip where she used to wear her gun. It had been some years since she last carried a gun or a badge but old habits died hard. She let her hand drop to her side as she cautiously emerged from the office.

Kate was startled at seeing who was standing in the kitchen.

"Alexis?"

"Oh, Kate, hey?"

Alexis moved quickly from the kitchen going over to where Kate was standing. The two women hugged warmly.

"What are you doing here?" Kate asked as they pulled away from the embrace.

"Can't I visit my mother?" Alexis replied.

Kate could not help but smile at being called mother by Alexis. She watched as Alexis headed back to the kitchen and over to the espresso machine. Kate walked over to the island and perched herself on a stool.

"I mean, I thought you were in London."

"I finished up early, so I caught the first flight out and flew in this morning." Alexis explained.

Kate watched as Alexis set about making two cups of coffee. She had not seen Alexis in over two weeks because she had been on a tour in Europe promoting her latest novel. Kate had been both surprised and proud that Alexis had chosen to become a writer. Prouder still that she had become very successful. Kate smiled at the memory of Castle being over the moon that his daughter had wanted to become a writer. His heart was fit to burst that day when she had her first best seller.

Alexis still looked as beautiful as ever. Her long red tresses had been shortened well over twenty years ago and her face had a few more lines but she still had those beautiful blue eyes that reminded Kate of Castle.

Alexis picked up the mugs and brought them over, passing one to Kate.

"You were worried about me, weren't you?" Kate said, narrowing her eyes at the other woman.

"No." Alexis said hurriedly and turned her attention to her coffee.

Kate smiled at the other woman.

"Alexis, I'm all right." Kate assured her. "I'm not going to hide away or curl up into a ball, crying my eyes out."

Alexis looked over to Kate trying not to look embarrassed.

"I'm fine, really." Kate said. "I'm meeting Lanie for lunch later, do you want to join us? We'll be complaining about our children."

"Sounds great, count me in." Alexis said, laughing.

After the laughter had died down, Alexis reached out and placed her hand over Kate's and looked at her.

"Are you sure, you're all right?" She asked in a low voice.

"Yeah, I'm sure." Kate nodded. "So I don't get a bouquet of roses this year."

Truth be told, Kate would miss receiving the bouquet of roses. Those roses that were a pinkish red in colour and reading the inscription from him on the card: Kate, my love for you grows.

Alexis chuckled. "You know there's a story behind those roses?"

Kate was not surprised to learn that there was a story behind the roses she received every year on Valentine's day, on her birthday and on Mothers' Day. There had to be a story, it was Castle after all.

"Did he ever tell you about them?" Alexis asked.

Kate shook her head.

Alexis came around the island and settled down on the stool next to Kate.

"I think it was a couple of years after you and dad got together." Alexis said, starting the story. "He wanted to get you a special rose for those special occasions."

"That doesn't surprise me." Kate said shaking her head.

"Anyway he asked me about it because he thought a dozen red roses was a little too boring. He wanted to do something Castle-like."

"Something big and way over the top, right?" Kate chuckled.

Alexis nodded her head. "Yeah. But I managed to convince him you wouldn't go for that."

"I always thought you were the smart one in the family."

Alexis grinned at that before she resumed her story.

"What dad did was to call up the Rose Society and got a hold of one of their award winning growers and commissioned him to create a new rose. The new rose was named 'Blushing Kate'."

Kate could not hide the look of surprise that appeared on her face. That man, she thought to herself as she shook her head. Even now he continued to surprise her.

"He never told me." Kate said in a low voice. "Wow."

"Yeah." Alexis said with a smile. She reached out and took hold of Kate's hand and gave it a gentle loving squeeze.

"He loved you so much, Kate."

"I loved him to." Kate whispered back, fighting back the tears that threatened.

Their conversation was interrupted by the sound of the door bell. Kate retrieved her hand and then slipped off the stool. She slowly walked to the front door. Opening the door she was surprised to find Mr Gomez, the owner of the local florist shop that was just around the corner from the loft.

"Mr Gomez?"

"Good morning, Mrs Castle." Gomez said with a bright smile. "These are for you."

Kate's eyes dropped to the large bouquet of flowers that man was holding out to her. She recognised the roses immediately. They were Blushing Kates. She made no move to accept the flowers.

"There must be some mistake, Mr Gomez."

"No mistake, Mrs Castle."

The shock of surprise suddenly turned to anger. She glared at the man standing in front of her.

"Is this some kind of joke?" She demanded.

"No, no, Mrs Castle...this is no joke." Gomez insisted.

The florist was looking nervously. He had not expected this reaction from Kate. He lifted up the bouquet.

"These are for you, Mrs Beckett." He said. "Please read the card and then I will explain."

Kate reined in her anger and slowly took the bouquet from the florist. Nestling the bouquet in one arm she took out the card and opened it. She recognised the handwriting. She let out a loud shocked gasp. She staggered back a couple of steps.

"Kate, are you alright?" Alexis said worriedly as she came over.

Kate did not respond to Alexis. She was staring at the card in her hand.

"Mr Castle came into my shop about eight months ago and placed a very specific order." Mr Gomez explained carefully. "He instructed me to deliver a bouquet of these special roses to you on Valentine's Day every year. He paid me quite a lot of money to make sure it was done. I took it upon myself to make the delivery personally."

"Kate?" Alexis said gently.

Kate looked up at Alexis with tear filled eyes. She held out the card in her hand for the other woman to read. Alexis took the card and read it.

Kate, my love for you is eternal, Rick.

XXXX

I had not intended to write a Valentine's Day story but I was inspired to write this particular story after seeing something on twitter about a man who for over forty years would send flowers to his wife on Valentine's Day with the inscription 'may love for you grows' and who arranged to have flowers delivered to her on Valentine's Day after his death. It brought a tear to my eye.

I hope you liked this. Drop me a line to let me know what you thought of it.

Con