I looked around wildly, trying to figure out what was going on. I got up shakily, once again realizing how much alcohol I had consumed. I did not like how the floor felt as if it was shifting as I moved. Why had I found this enjoyable before?

"You're afraid!" one guy was telling the other. "You're all afraid and are going to hole up in your mansions and let your guardians do all the work! What are you going to do when they're all dead? Who will protect you then?"

He was young, and normally probably quite good looking. His fangs flashed as he spoke, conveying how angry he was. The other guy, an older one, was puffing up. "No. We shouldn't risk Moroi life! If we listen to that Strigoi-lover, we'll all be dead!"

I assumed they were talking about Tasha, because she was the only one who had proposed Moroi using their magic.

The younger guy began to puff up, too, suddenly seeming much bigger than before. I fought the urge to roll my eyes- which given my drunken state, was quite a feat- at the typical boyish pride.

The younger guy went in for a punch, and while his technique was all wrong, he managed to draw blood. "I'll have you arrested for attacking a royal!" the older guy hissed as he wiped the blood from his face. He moved to punch the younger guy, but he swung too wide, clipping his ear.

"See how weak you royals are?" the younger guy asked. "We need to train and fight along the dhampirs! Restore the former glory of our race!"

I walked in between them to stop the likelihood of anymore punches being thrown. "Shut up!" I told them, irritated. "You," I said, pointing at the younger guy. "You don't know anything about fighting." The older guy started to look smug, so, I turned to him next. "And you! Moroi aren't God's gift to the world. Just because we're the only ones dhampirs can reproduce with doesn't mean we should think we're better than them!"

They both looked at me, gobsmacked. The older guy opened his mouth to speak, his eyes narrowing dangerously. "And who are you, little girl?" he asked. "You're certainly not a royal. You're a nobody."

I glared at him. "I'm just trying to stop you guys from looking any more idiotic than you already do! You want to help? Stop fighting each other. Ripping off each other's heads isn't going to save us, unless you're trying to win the Darwin awards!" I paused to get a breath before continuing on. The next words to leave my mouth almost caused me physical pain. "Tasha Ozera is not trying to kill us all off. She's trying to get you to stop being a victim!"

They stared at me like I was crazy. At least they had shut up, though. This only lasted for a few seconds, however, before they started in on each other again. I began to be pushed in the middle of everything, and then I was pulled out of it by a pair of strong, pale hands.

My savior turned out to be Mason, who entered into the fray. He punched the non-royal guy first, who landed in one of the pools with a splash. I grabbed Mason's arm to pull him back as he went for the royal, but he shrugged me off. He shoved the guy, pushing him into the guys who were probably his posse.

One of his friends put a reassuring hand on his arm, gentle words spoken. They were attempting to calm him down. Luckily, they were able to lead him away as the non-royal got out of the pool, a furious look on his face. "Don't," I told him. He looked like he might try to take Mason on, but thought better of it. He probably remembered the ease in which Mason had clocked him, literally throwing him feet back with the impact.

"Are you crazy?" I asked him.

"Huh?" he asked eloquently.

"Jumping into the middle of that!"

"You jumped in too," he defended himself. "And you were much more likely to get hurt."

I felt my magic rising up with the anger I felt, but I pushed it down. I didn't want to hurt Mason. "It's different," I muttered.

"Are you drunk?" he asked.

"No! I'm just trying to keep you from doing something stupid. Attacking a royal can get you jail time."

He looked at me incredulously. "I defend your honor, and all you think about is the fact that I punched a royal?"

"I don't need you to defend my honor," I told him. "I'm perfectly capable of handling things without you." While it was true that I didn't need Mason, I knew the words were especially cruel. I couldn't stop saying the words though. It was like word vomit. The bad thing was, a small part of me enjoyed seeing the stricken look on his face.

I shook my head, trying to clear it. Mason was stiff, his eyes looking anywhere but me. "If that's how you feel," he said. "I'll just leave you to your own devices."

He left, gait robotic. I felt a pang of regret, my mind clearing a bit as I realized, once more, how cruel I had been. I bit my lip as I tried to figure out what I should do. I didn't want to go back to the party, but I felt the need to check on Lissa.

I went in search of her, seeing that she wasn't in the pools. I looked for her in the feeding room- blood did sound kind of good right now, but I was on a mission- I looked for her in the bathroom. Finally, I found her sitting in an empty room, Adrian's arm around her shoulders. I tried to decipher what she was feeling, but the bond was numb, thanks to the amount of alcohol I had consumed.

"What's going on here?" I asked. I didn't think she'd cheat on Christian, but Adrian did seem to have some weird charisma.

"Rose!" Lissa smiled, shrugging out from under Adrian's arm. "Adrian was just telling me about how he hasn't specialized, either."

Confused, I looked between the two. Why would it matter to her whether he had specialized or not? She was a spirit user, not a lazy drunk.

"How did you find her?" Adrian asked.

"Um, I looked for her?" It came out like a question, and I wasn't sure what he was really asking.

"Oh," he sounded disappointed. "I thought you might have used your bond."

"How do you know about that?" I asked sharply.

"I can't reveal all my secrets," his mouth blossomed into a relaxed grin.

I blinked, turning back to Lissa. "Right, well I just wanted to check on you before I left."

Lissa nodded. "I'm fine. Do you need someone to walk you to the room?" she asked worriedly.

"No, I'm fine," I told her. "I can make it there. I'm gonna try to sleep through the hangover I'm sure to have."

"If you're sure," she said, still a little uncertainly.

I nodded to her. "Don't worry about me."

"Well, I'll see you later, then," Lissa smiled gently. She turned back to talk to Adrian, and for a moment I attempted to get into her head. It was like the first time I'd ever tried, like I wasn't in tune to her enough. I knew that it had to be the alcohol affecting me, so I just shook my head and walked from the room.

With little difficulty, I found the stairs that led to the main part of the lodge. I felt a breeze of cold air hit me as I entered the main corridor, and looked down to realize I had forgotten my cover-up poolside. Hopefully, nobody would ask why I was wearing a bikini in a ski lodge.

Instead of going to my room, as I had originally planned, I went to Dimitri's. I knew that he likely wouldn't want to have the talk he'd promised while I was even a little intoxicated, but I still wanted to spend the time with him. After the attack on both the Badicas and Drozdovs, no one would question why I felt more secure with my guardian around.

I knocked on his door, and eerily reminiscent to the night we'd been subjected to the lust charm, he opened the door in his pajamas. "Rose?" he asked.

"Hey, Comrade. Can I come in?" my speech was still a little slurred, but I didn't think I sounded completely wasted.

He immediately let me in, unconsciously looking around in the hallway to make sure nobody had seen.

"What are you doing in a bathing suit?" he asked as he dug around in his suitcase.

"I was at this party," I told him. "But I missed you."

"Are you drunk?" he asked.

"Maybe a little," I admitted. "But I didn't know those chocolate things were alcoholic!"

He shook his head, finally pulling a t-shirt out. "Here, Roza," he held the shirt out to me. "And, hold on…" he trailed off, digging through his suitcase again. He fished out a pair of boxers. "They're clean, I promise."

"I trust you," I said honestly. "Here, I'll go change." I moved towards the en suite bathroom, turning back to look at him once more before closing the door. He was watching me, an indecipherable look in his dark eyes.

In the bathroom, I looked into the mirror. I sort of looked like a mess. My hair had dried messily, my face more sallow than I would have liked. My eyes were slightly glazed, and my lips were chapped. I supposed alcohol didn't make me look great, or at least, not when I had also been swimming.

I peeled off the bikini, the feeling reminiscent to peeling off Band-Aid. The feeling that accompanied shedding the clothing, however, was something akin to freedom. I found an unused towel and dried myself completely before sliding Dimitri's boxers up my legs. Next, I pulled the t-shirt over my head, only feeling slightly self-conscious that I didn't have a bra with me.

I splashed my face with cold water, hoping it would make me look a little better. I pinched my cheeks, bringing a slight flush to them. "You look great," I whisper-encouraged.

Deciding to skip rinsing my hair of chlorine, in favor of seeing Dimitri sooner, and maybe even going to sleep, I walked out of the bathroom.

Switching off the light as I exited, I saw that Dimitri was sitting on his bed, reading another western. I could tell by the cover that it wasn't Louis L'Amour. "Which book is that, Comrade?" I asked him. I sounded a great deal more sober, at least to my own ears.

He looked at the cover, as if he had forgotten. "Blood Meridian, by Cormac McCarthy. I believe that the Moroi classes have studied his book, The Orchard Keeper."

"They must have covered it while I was incognito," I murmured. "'Cause I have never heard of him."

He shook his head, chuckling. "Well, this one is much more enjoyable than The Orchard Keeper. In fact, I could lend it to you when I'm done. I think you'd enjoy the amount of violence."

"Hmm, well, I hated Shalako," I told him.

Dimitri shook his head again, a small smile on his face. "Oh, right. Well, give this one a shot. I think you'd hate it… less."

I noticed that he was almost at the end of the book. "How much longer do you have left?" I asked.

"About twenty pages," he told me. "I'll read until the next chapter, and then we can talk."

I nodded to him, settling in on his bed. I got under the covers, my body sinking into the cloud of a mattress. For the next fifteen minutes, I watched him read the book. He was so enthralled, his mask was down. I could see how exciting he must find the events that were playing out both on the page and in his mind.

Finally, he closed the book happily. "Good end to the chapter, Comrade?" I asked.

He nodded. "Yes, I think the book may end well. Hopefully…"

"You and your westerns," I teased.

He looked at me carefully. "Maybe we should go to sleep, Roza. I think it would be best not to have this talk while you're still impaired."

"I'm not impaired," I whined. I scooted close to him, pressing myself into his side. He was so warm, and so solid. I snuggled into him, listening to his heartbeat. It was one of my favorite things to do whenever I lay down with him. It was so steady, just like him.

Dimitri's arm snaked around me, pulling me the smallest bit closer. I closed my eyes, just enjoying the moment between us. "This is nice," I told him. "I like us so much better when we're not fighting."

"Me too, Roza. Me too."

I nuzzled his side, and his arm began to rub my arm. I found myself drifting, the beat of Dimitri's heart lulling me even further. I dreamed pleasant dreams of Dimitri and me on a beach, kissing languidly.

TRSTRSTRS

I woke up in darkness. It shouldn't have startled me the way it did, considering I woke up to darkness every morning. Still, it took me a minute to remember where I was.

I hummed happily for a moment, noticing that I was practically on top of Dimitri. My hand was in his hair, and our legs were tangled together. His chest was still warm, his breathing relaxed and easy. And nestled between my legs was something hard.

Was that-?

Hello, Cowboy!

I knew morning wood was supposed to be a normal thing for guys, but I had never noticed it before, all the times I had spent the night with Dimitri. It was a strange thing, but it didn't bother me.

I wondered if he had set his alarm, but decided not to wake him up until it went off. I was happy spending the whole morning here. Not even the morning, but the whole day. As long as I was in Dimitri's arms, I could spend my whole life here.

I closed my eyes again, rubbing his hair between my fingers. He moaned quietly, making my insides quiver at the sound. "Roza," his voice was husky with sleep. "I know you're awake."

"Can we just lay here?" I whined. "You're comfortable."

His chest rumbled in what I assumed was laughter. "Lissa will probably start wondering where you are if you don't get in your room before she wakes up."

"I don't care," I said seriously. "I just want to be here with you right now."

"I have some guardian things I have to do," he said.

I looked up into his eyes, widening my own for maximum pouting. "Please?" I stuck my lower lip out the merest bit. I hugged onto him tighter.

He groaned. "Rozaaaa."

My insides quivered once again, and I was once again intensely aware of the erection that I could feel pressing into me. Ignore it, I told myself. He isn't interested in you that way.

"Roza," he said with an air of finality. "Princess Dragomir invited you to that banquet tonight, didn't she?"

"How did you know about that?" I asked. "Oh, right, you're a guardian. And yes, so?"

"She will be wanting to get ready early."

I groaned this time, and he gently rolled me off of him. I clung to him, but he carefully disengaged. "I'll see you at the banquet, Roza."

He got up, tugging me with him. I hugged him. "I'll be the one wearing red," I said.

"I'll be the one against the wall," he joked back.

I hugged him a little tighter before letting go and heading towards the door. "You can keep the bikini, by the way," I told him, glancing over my shoulder. "You know, to remember me by." I turned back towards the door, and walked towards my room. I wondered what I must look like, in an oversized shirt and men's boxers. It would look like a walk of shame to anyone lucky enough to witness it.

There was no shame in my walk, however, when I walked into the darkened suite that I shared with Lissa.

She was still snoozing peacefully in her bed, as I had anticipated. Sparky wasn't there, which I found strange, but didn't bother to question as I slipped into my own bed. It didn't feel like my bed anymore. Now, it was too cold, and Dimitri-less.

I wondered what my bed at school would feel like when I returned.

I slipped in and out of a tired, sad, haze. I slipped into Lissa's head at one point, on accident. She was dreaming about Christian. What a surprise. I escaped as soon as I could before I virtually lost my virginity to her fantasy Christian.

I woke up, annoyed and missing Dimitri. I looked at the alarm clock, noting that it was now eleven in the morning. It was now even darker than before, and I knew that I should probably wake up Lissa. Instead, I slid out of bed and headed to take a luxurious bubble bath in the huge Jacuzzi tub.

About twenty minutes into my bath, there was a knock on the bathroom door. "Rose?" Lissa's voice rang through. "Can I come in and pee?"

"Sure, Lissa," I said. I didn't even bother to try to cover up; the bubbles were enough to block off any of my more private parts. Not that that really mattered, considering Lissa and I had seen each other in various states of undress while on the run.

She came in, careful to avoid looking at me. "Good dream?" I couldn't help but ask.

She blushed darkly, and I laughed a little. "You were there?" she was mortified; I could feel it through the bond.

"Well, I couldn't help it while I was sleeping. But don't worry. As soon as I realized what was happening, I got the hell out of dodge. I'd hate to lose my virginity to Christian of all people."

"Oh, Rose," Lissa said, a steady stream hitting the toilet water. "You're still a virgin?" she sounded both shocked and happy.

"Yeah, well, it isn't like I've got anyone to have sex with," I told her.

"There's Mason," she suggested innocently. She got up and flushed, her nightgown falling easily back down her hips.

"I don't think so," I whispered, a little sadly. I had tried with him, but I was coming to realize that even if Dimitri took that offer from Tasha, I wouldn't be able to use Mason like that.

"But he's so sweet! He has it so bad for you! And," she paused dramatically, a smile on her face. "He is cute for a ginger."

"Sure," I said. "But I just don't really feel that way for him."

"You sure acted interested in him the other day. Unless… are you interested in someone else? Someone, maybe, with sexy green eyes?"

I immediately knew she was talking about Adrian. I almost threw up a little in my mouth. "God, no," I told her. "Adrian, he just has some weird crush on me."

She shook her head. "He really is too much of a player, anyway," she agreed. "I mean, we may call each other 'cousin,' and while I am hopelessly devoted to Christian, Adrian is pretty sexy."

I shuddered. "He has weird charisma, is all."

She finished washing her hands. "Don't take too much longer, please?" she asked. "I promised Chris I'd meet him for lunch at one."

Sidelined again for Christian. I didn't mind this time, though, because I was going to get some lunch, too. Maybe try to find my mom and apologize about my behavior on Christmas.

I washed and shampooed and conditioned and got out and dried myself off. "Bathroom's all yours," I told her, rooting around for underwear in my suitcase. I finally found a thong that would go perfectly with my dress. I found a strapless bra, and donned a loose knit sweater and a pair of plain black leggings with some Ugg boots.

I threw my hair in a bun before heading down to the dining hall. I grabbed a tray of food and looked around for somebody to eat with. Nobody I knew was present except a few snobs from school, so I decided to eat by myself.

Halfway through eating, Tasha sat down next to me. "Hey, Tasha," I said. I smiled politely. I wasn't as angry with her as I had been, but I was still slightly sore that she was moving in on my man.

"Hello Rose. How are you?" her scarred but pretty face twisted into a pretty smile.

"I'm good. A little tired. Hey, I'm sorry that I acted the way that I did. My mom told me about how you'd asked Dimitri to be your guardian, and it felt like you were trying to take him away to spite me." I was lying slightly.

"Why would I take him to spite you, Rose?"

"I don't know. I couldn't figure it out. I was just sad, because he's my guardian, you know? It's probably a little childish, but I don't feel like I'd get a guardian if he left for another charge," I couldn't tell her that he was mine. My man.

"But you've been learning to protect yourself," Tasha argued gently. "You won't need a guardian by the time I'm finished with you." She smiled a little.

"Oh, I know, but Dimitri genuinely cares. And he knows about offensive magic, so he'd be okay if I helped off a Strigoi if he needed the help. Most guardians wouldn't do that. I figured we could make a good team, if the situation ever arose."

She nodded. "Well, he still hasn't given me an answer. In fact, I'm supposed to be meeting him in twenty minutes, so I'd better go."

I nodded, and she took a final bite of her apple as we rose from the table. "I'll see you at the party tonight," I told her.

"I hope you'll wear the dress," Tasha smiled, fangs showing.

I waved goodbye and headed towards the feeders. I sort of missed Alice, but shrugged off the thought as I sat down and bit into the man's neck. It was warm, and I briefly wondered what Dimitri's blood would feel like on my tongue, running down my throat, nourishing my body.

Bad Rose, I chastised myself. Dimitri is not a feeding bag, no matter what he means to you.

Logically, I knew this of course. Still, it was difficult to keep the thought from nagging at me as I continually pushed it down.

I finished drinking from the man, wiping my mouth with a napkin.

Soon, the incisions from my fangs would disappear. Probably sooner than the effects of the high, honestly.

I went in search of my mother, but never succeeded in finding her. Finally, I went back to my room, laying on the bed in wait for Lissa.