Author's Note

I'm not exactly a To-Love-Ru fan, but I'll give credit to its fans: they're supportive of the show and I can't criticize them for it. This one-shot is pretty much a huge "What-if" aftermath of the whole series, and yes, it's sort of a deconstruction one-shot fic, but it's not entirely. It takes place way after To-Love-Ru Darkness.

While people are likely to not like my risky take on this, just remember: it's a pretty humble opinion of the series as a whole. Don't take it too serious.

A black screen turns on from a camera as Lala Satalin Deviluke then sits on a bed and she sighs deeply, then fixing her hair a bit.

"I'm usually cheery and all, but…"

She sighs again, twiddling her fingers a bit.

"I'm making this video on how as sort of a warning to any Earthlings, or aliens or whatever who might have a similar incident that happened like this before. It does have a happy ending, though. Heed my words well. There…might be some harsh words involved, too."

She clears her throat.

"It was 7 years ago. I ran away from home because my fellow royal family wanted me to marry one of the chosen suitors, but I wasn't interested in any of them. After running away for home, I encountered a boy named Rito Yuuki. I first pretended to love me so my Dad wouldn't destroy the Earth—no BSing here, by the way-, but then I actually fell in love with him due to a dumb, dumb, dumb misunderstanding. Now, if you can believe my now regretful tone, it'll become clear, you see. In a span of a year or so, tons of other girls then spontaneously just fall in love with him. I noticed this since…well; the other girls talk about him in either lustfully or lovingly. Even Mikan seemed…a little too caring with him. Even my sister, Momo noticed it and wanted to make a…"

She then groans, being disgusted, covering her face.

"She wanted him to have a harem. When she told me that, I faked smiling. At first I thought it was jealousy, but no, that's common sense coming into play, and it sort of changed on me. I then thought "Does my sister want us to be like whores"? Not just that, no, the question was, "Why are we falling head over heels over a guy like him?" We're fucking women. We have rights, we can decide who to fall in love, but this is nothing but desperation and maybe even sexist. This incredibly stupid attempts to sexualize ourselves to lust is awful, just incredibly dubious! I went as far as tell telling Yui one time, "Hey, Yui, why do you love him, anyways?" She told me this: "He saved me, meaning he cares for me. Aren't you this, too?" I told her to get some common sense, but she keeps saying "He's the one." I almost wanted to slap her. I tried telling the other girls all together on why they should love him. I couldn't believe the responses I was getting. I told them how they're part of this stupid harem and they still sort of didn't mind with the exception of Haruna, Yami and Mikan, who at least were smart enough to realize my theory. I basically told my sister that I lied and not go with the idea, adding the details how it made everyone else act slutty and desperate. She thought I was being, of course, jealous, but I told her to find some logic in all this. She had this real dumbfounded look on her face, like if she's never heard of the word and just shrugs it all off."

She then takes a deep breath to calm herself.

"It was also that I realized that I didn't love Rito anymore, but then the planet would be doomed, because, well, Dad would have to destroy it. I told Rito that my feelings for him were gone. He almost didn't understand why it's so abrupt, either, but I told him that it's a little complicated and that we should just be friends. I try to tell him that he's just not interesting, but I find it really difficult. It's frustrating, too, because it feels like I'm insulting him. I didn't want to hurt his feelings at all, just…"

Tears then start falling on her face as she also sniffs, going out of the camera and finding a tissue, blowing on it, then returning to the front of the camera with tissue in hand as she looks a bit more calmer now.

"Sorry for that…it's indeed frustrating…anyways…I told Rito that if he's ever feeling used. He says he doesn't. I then told them who he really loves. He didn't say me, nor Haruna, surprisingly, but Yui, instead. He admits he can sense something in her different from everyone else, that she's likely to be more honest than any of the other ones. He sort of thought that he never really is meant to be with Haruna. I then decided…to actually suddenly tell him if he feels sad or just frustrating about this. Surprisingly, he told me that the reason why he doesn't seem to feel right about himself is that he indeed feels empty, so turns out I was sadly right…he then recalls being called "boring" in class when he was younger. Even with all that, I wasn't infatuated, which is then when I realized how I'm not really into him anymore, but I did comfort him as a friend. I told him to simply not be afraid and tell Yui how he feels. After thinking for a while, he realized that he should at least take a few more risks and believe in himself more often."

She then starts to smile, causing her to relax.

"And he did. It took him one more day, but he would start a relationship with Yui. I told the other girls to just back off and fine your own lovers. Momo then complained that her Harem plans didn't work. I then felt that a small slap to her would be necessary. I told her that it's how it really works, and if she's not happy about it, it's like crying over spilled milk. For once, I became a more responsible sister. And I also improved both Momo and Nana's behaviors from now on. They even apologized for skipping studies and made up quite nicely."

Lala wipes another tear off her face.

"In an hour-long conversation, I told my Dad that I wasn't in love with Rito anymore and to not destroy Earth anymore. However, turns out he got calm about it and doesn't mind me being in Earth for a while, but if I felt uncomfortable, I would leave whenever I want. I decided to stay over with Haruna's. This is where…well…it got weird. In a good way this time. She also accepted Rito's loving for Yui and we indeed got more friendlier than ever, since we ended up talking a lot more than ever. For everyone else, it seemed like they indeed moved on with the life. Not that awkward stuff happened…"

She then blushes and tries to hold a laugh.

"One time I visited Rito's home to chat with Mikan for a bit, however…I saw her and Yami in a make-out session."

She awkwardly scratches her head.

"Yami sort of was a little too aggressive, so I let the cuties alone. Just a few months ago, they actually got married, only a few weeks after Mikan's 18th birthday."

Lala then leaves and returns with photos of said wedding, with a grown-up Mikan kissing Yami at the wedding.

"I believe there was a shy contest, too. They couldn't stop blushing throughout. Mikan told me how this is how love should be, not have everyone fall in love with one guy or girl and all, just one and one, that's all. However, even before the wedding, after all those years, I think just maybe I might be falling in love with someone."

She blushes and twiddles her fingers again.

"Even with my friends having happier lives, I couldn't stop thinking…will I have a happy ending, too? There was a bit of a uneasy feeling somehow. Luckily, it seems it might happen after all. At this point 3 years ago, I had a deep conversation with…Haruna, and told her that I might…be sort in love with her. I told her how most of the times we went out, it felt like we were dating instead of just hanging out, and most of our talking got a little too personal. We decided that we would have a real actual date. Lots of awkward things happened as we went to a fancy diner, and—"

"Lala?"

Lala then notices Haruna Sairenji to the left of her.

"Oh, hey…" Lala responded nervously.

Haruna giggles a bit then sits down alongside her, "Don't worry, you already told me about the video thing you were gonna do. I kinda actually want to join in. What part are you on currently?"

"Well, our cute relationship."

"You're talking about how we watched a movie we were decided on me hating it and you liking it. Had a tiny vocal fight."

"Don't remind me…"

Haruna comforts her with a hug and pecks her lips.

"You forgave me big time, though."

"Mm-hmm. True. I overreacted." Lala said with a laugh as she then turns back to the camera.

"After that, I proposed to her. She immediately said yes. I can remember our reaction pretty well, it was something like…"

Lala then started jumping and shrieking in excitement as Haruna giggles, saying "Stooop~!", with Lala laughing as well as she sits again. They then show their wedding rings.

"And well…my Dad was a little skeptical at first, but felt if we do truly love each other, he would allow it. As a request, I made sure we wouldn't be both Queens, just a resident of Earth, but they can make visits if they want."

"My family was quite fine with it, too. It's less that we like other girls, but each other."

"So about 7 months later we would have our wedding, at a normal looking hotel—had great baths by the way, of course-, and…"

As Lala said that, Haruna chuckles.

"…and I got so excited that I almost tripped, but Haruna helped regained my balance."

"And when we left the altar, I tripped, but she helped me, too. We definately connect like that."

Haruna leaves, then returns with many photos, including their wedding kiss.

"While technically I fell in love with an alien princess, she looks too ridiculously human, really." said Haruna.

"Oh, you can totally say that. Not exactly weird, either. Oh, almost time for my final words."

"Go ahead, Lala."

Lala clears her throat.

"So…While it did end up nicely for us, remaining most of our friendships, and other lives kept the same, I am aware it just felt…lucky. There's always one true pairing, and for any women, and men, too, since it could also happen. Don't get jealous, or suspicious. It'll likely end up having major love troubles. Dumb, silly, idiotic, weird, but maybe even tragic love troubles. If it somehow ends up like us now at the end, good for you. Anyone that might have something like this, tells your friends, hear any word of mouth, but either way, see this video. Logic will set in a lot and you'll see that you might stop a possible friendship wreck. Why not just be friends with that one guy? You don't need to fall heads over heels immediately. There's other fish at sea. Life goes, so make sure you don't lose more just to try to gain one. That's all. God bless."

Lala then turns of the recording.

"Was it hard for you, Lala?" said Haruna.

"A little at first…it a teensy bit hard reliving pasts."

Haruna then hugs her from behind, "But you have friends now. It's been better in the past few years. Our patience got worth it, it's satisfying, actually, like a long painful journey with the most satisfactory ending."

Lala giggled a bit, "You sounded like one of those dramatic voiceovers."

"Guess you'll now say it's highly-profitable, too." Haruna joked back.

Lala then hugs back, smiling, "You were the one for me after all, though. Thank you so much, Haruna~. You're just the perfect wife~!"

"We're each other's perfect wife~."

"Hopefully, no one else end up horribly, and be like me and you, Yui and Rito, Mikan and Yami…how love works."

"Me too~. You're a responsible person, Lala, I love you~."

"Love you too, Haruna~."

They share an embrace, and share one more deep and loving kiss.

THE END