I don't own Hetalia, but I'm willing to buy the rights if Himuruya's selling. :3

"No! Wait! Hold that door!" Sweden yelled, waving his arm wildly. He ran along the elevators in the hotel lobby to get to the only working or available elevator, frantically trying to get the attention of the occupant that just went inside it. Sweden ran inside the elevator and turned around to face the doors. "Tack," he panted, slightly winded from the sudden exercise.

"You're welcome, sir," the occupant replied, trying his best to avoid eye contact before he bolted out of the elevator in terror of the glaring giant. He stepped towards the buttons and reached towards it with a trembling hand. "So, uh, which level?"

"Level sixty, please..."

"Okay." The man pressed two buttons for them both and stood still, looking around and humming to himself as the doors closed and the elevator started lifting.

After Sweden stopped panting, he straightened the tie and blazer of his suit that became slightly messy from the run. He then folded his hands in front of him and stood silently, patiently awaiting his floor. Outside he appeared stoic, intimidating even, but inside he was a bit nervous about going to the United Nations Fantastico Party put together and hosted by the Bad Touch Trio because one, he didn't do too well in parties with hundreds of people frightened by his presence and two, if it's hosted by the Bad Touch Trio, then smut of all kinds just might ensue. He took a deep breath to calm his nerves. You'll get through the night, Sweden, he thought to himself. Then you can go home and relax to a good book...

Once the elevator bell rang and the doors began to open, the other occupant scurried quickly out of it and turned to wave. "Well, it was nice riding with you, sir, goodbye!" he chimed nervously before running. Sweden looked at the man with a confused look but shrugged and let it go.

Just when the doors were about to close, a small woman came stumbling towards them and blocked one of them with an arm, her head hanging limply and moans escaping from her. In her other hand, the woman held a bottle of Absolut vodka, the marshmallow flavored kind.

"Oh, my goodness!" Sweden yelped in surprise. "Are you okay, ma'am?!" He reached out to help the woman, unsure what to do to help her, when he was able to take a closer look at her. ...Wait, that's not a woman...

Although the loose, flowy black school uniform miniskirt, powdery pink, short-sleeved gossamer blouse, and black rose hair clip fit his delicate physique perfectly, there was no mistaking the subtle masculine features of this "woman's" legs and arms, and the blouse was tight enough to reveal a flat chest behind the fabric. Sweden gripped one of the person's shoulders- feeling that it was indeed too bulky to belong to a woman, if not noticeably bulky like his own- and lifted the person's chin with a finger.

The person's eyelids fluttered over unfocused eyes, the usual warmth of the chocolate irises clouded over from alcohol, but when those eyes met Sweden's, those eyes brightened a lot as the person gave a wide grin. "Sweddie pie~!" The person squealed drunkenly in his Finnish accented voice.

"F-Finland?!" Sweden cried. He caught the drunk nation in his arms and snatched away the three-quarter empty vodka bottle. Oh, my goodness, this could've killed him! Sweden thought as he looked at the bottle in his hand before looking down at the sloppy mess draping his arm.

"Oh, Sweddie pie, you m- hic- made it!" Finland cheered as he looked up at Sweden. "I'm-a glad you decided to come after all! Oh! I just- hic- sounded like Italy just there! Tee hee hee hee!"

Sweden stared down at the nation, noticing that Finland's eyes were much brighter and his cheeks were flushed in a deeper shade of pink than it usually was. He then looked away, blushing madly. So cute...

"Mmm, Sweden, do you- hic- know how hot you look in this tux?" Finland purred, running his fingers lightly along the tie around Sweden's neck. He started shifting from one foot to another, swaying from side to side and making Sweden sway with him. When he noticed that Sweden was looking away with an uncomfortable scowl on his face, he pouted angrily at the lack of attention and swiftly- but weakly- punched Sweden's arm "P-pay attention while I'm talking, you..you ass! Damn, appreciate the little bit of compliments you do get! Hmph!"

Slowly, just enough so that he'd have time to erase the hint of hurt from his face at Finland's last comment, Sweden turned his gaze back down at the Finnish country, and Finland was able to see the deep red painted all over his face.

Finland started to giggle uncontrollably and patted Sweden's cheek. "D'awwwwwww, you're blushing! That's so cute~! I didn't know- hic- you were capable of doing that! You're not such a scary monster after all!"

Don't take that to heart, Sweden told himself. He's just drunk and doesn't know what he's saying...Then again, if he's drunk, then he's telling me what he truly thinks without inhibitions stopping him... Fighting off the feeling of his heart tearing slowly, Sweden missed when Finland started pressing their bodies together and fingering the tie. It was only feeling something hard brush against his thigh that brought back Sweden's attention. Finland was slowly moving up and down against Sweden's body, giving him an alluring flutter of his eyelashes. "U-uh, F-Finland...?"

The elevator stopped at level twenty-one, and the doors opened the dancing scene to an unsuspecting Cuba just as Finland purred, "How d'ya like these hips-hic- Sweddie pie?" Cuba, who jumped at the scene with a strange expression, started barking wild laughter and turning away.

"I-it isn't what it looks like!" Sweden called after the man before the doors closed. He lightly shoved Finland away. "Finland! Stop! Now!" he said forcefully. Offended by the push, Finland pouted again and starting quivering his bottom lip. Sweden grimaced and shook his head. "Finland, please don't-"

"What's wrong, Sweden? Y-you don't l-like my hips?" Finland whimpered. "Y-you don't like my-hic- hips at all?" He started to tear up.

Sweden put his palms up consolingly. "N-no, Finland, it's not that, I just- this is not the place, okay?"

"You don't like my hips!"

The elevator opened up to level twenty-three, and the would-be occupant, Seychelles, looked on at the breakdown of a cross-dressing man while a taller, more formidable-looking man in a suit and tie tried to console him and reassure him that, yes, he has nice hips, and yes, he looks good in his girly outfit, with an amused grin on her face. She turned her head away from the scene and covered the corner of her eye with the U.N. party invitation, silently walking away.

Finland sniffled and wiped away a single tear. "R-really? Y-you do?"

Sweden sighed and nodded. "Yes, Finland, I love...I love your hips."

"Really? Truly?"

"...Yes, Finland, I do."

Finland's face went back to its former sensual expression as he slid his hands down his legs, his fingers stopping just below his skirt. "You think I'm haaaaawt?"

"Yes, Finland, I do!" Sweden sighed in frustration, throwing his hands up. He glanced down at Finland's hands and saw that they were sliding up his thighs, bring the hem of his skirt with him. 'What are you doing?"

"I wanna give you my hips, Sweden..." Finland slurred in a husky tone.

"What-?"

Before Sweden could figure out what the drunk nation was about to do, Finland swiftly stepped up to him and semi-straddled Sweden's right thigh, clenching the limb in between his own thighs. Sweden stiffened. Finland was hard.

And going commando.

"Oh, Sweden, I think you're deliciously hot, too," Finland purred. He started sliding his hips up and down smoothly, brushing his hard member against the leg and enjoying the tugging friction. "And right about now, I'm having a big She Wolf appetite for your body~." Finland sped up his rubbing, giggling and gripping the lapel of Sweden's blazer.

Sweden froze on the spot, paralyzed with shock as he could do nothing but stare into space and gape in pure terror. Oh, my, goodness, is Finland really-? Oh, my goodness, what the hell, why is he- what?! This isn't happening. Oh, God, not in here! Damn it, Sweden, stop him before he hurts himself or something!

"Mmmm, S-Sweden! Oh!" Finland sped up his grinding motion even more, turning it into full-blown, sloppy humping. His ability to stand up straight was currently off due to his alcoholic stupor, so he slipped off to the side every few moments as he took the virginity of Sweden's leg. The skirt he wore managed to cover up his private areas despite the movement his hips were making. "Uhn, Sweden, yes! Yes! Oh, this is great~! Take me, big boy!"

The elevator stopped on floor thirty-two. The doors pulled apart and gave Lithuania an unexpected show of his dear friend Finland humping the leg of Sweden like a dog in heat, moaning and swaying from time to time. Lithuania flinched back and looked in horror, covering his gaping mouth. "O-oh, my goodness, I'm sorry, so sorry, I'll um go get another elevator, sorry!" He started to move in one direction and then turned around to move to the other direction, moving back and forth with his mind too disoriented from shock to really focus.

"O-oh! Sweden, that's so nice!" Finland cried as the elevator doors closed. He buried his face into Sweden's chest, muffling his moans of ecstasy into the fabric of the dress shirt. He pressed himself harder onto the limb and humped faster, biting into the man through the shirt and tie.

The elevator doors opened on level thirty-five, allowing the pornographic image to come out at full display at England. England's eyes widen at the unsavory scene, but his expression went back to its stoic, unimpressed frown. "I'm catching another lift," he deadpanned as he turned sharply on his heels and walked away.

"I-it isn't what it looks like," Sweden droned emotionlessly, his mind going blank with the high amount of embarrassment he was sure to feel later. The elevators began to rise to another level.

"Oh, oh, yes! Yes! Yes, yes, yes!" Finland reached up to grip Sweden's shoulder with one hand and the collar of Sweden's dress shirt with the other, accidently ripping the top two buttons out of place. He buckled his knees together behind Sweden's leg, trapping Sweden's thigh in a tight hold close to his bare member. "Sweddie pie, why are so damn hot?!" he groaned.

"U-u-um, I, uh," Sweden stammered, completely speechless as Finland panted heavily into his shirt.

The embarrassment continued as the elevator stopped on level forty. The doors pulled apart and Japan and Greece stood on the other side. Being the origin of yaoi of all degrees and being the first country known to allow homosexual release, the display of an effeminate cross-dressing man shoving his dick onto the leg of the more masculine and seemingly-dominant man had no overwhelming effect on the two nations.

Japan calmly pointed to the space besides him. "Yeah, uh, we'll just get another... or take the stairs...yeah." He led the pair away to the direction of the stairwell, with Greece commenting quietly, "Wow, I didn't see stuff like that back in my day!"

When the doors closed and the elevator went up, Sweden felt Finland quiver against him, grunting as if straining. Finland then whimpered and slowed down. Even though this slow progression should've been relieving, meaning that Finland was finally going to stop, Sweden couldn't help but feel a bit worried. He tapped Finland's shoulder. "F-Fin-?"

"OH, FUCK YES!" Finland moaned loudly as he tossed his head back. He writhed and pushed himself so hard against Sweden's thigh that they both fell onto the back wall of the elevator. He snaked his arms around Sweden and slid his hands up Sweden's back; if it weren't for the multiple layers of clothing, Sweden would've surely found deep scratch marks down his back from where Finland clawed at him later on. Finland literally pounded Sweden's leg into the elevator wall as he alternated between moaning and hiccupping, occasionally adding in a giggle of giddy delight.

"Ow..."Sweden winced. "My leg..."

"Uhn, Sweden...! UHN! Oh!"

When the elevator stopped on the forty-third floor to give access to the next potential occupant, Sweden and Finland were given Turkey as their next audience. The Turkish nation gaped at what was going on in front of him, his mouth opening and closing to form some comprehensible words. He then gave up and decided to just grin. "Whoo, Finland! Ride that bitch, home boy!" He cheered as he shot a fist in the air.

"I'm ridin'!" Finland moaned over his shoulder. "And it feels so damn good! Yes!"

When will my life end? Sweden wondered as he watch Turkey cheered and waved his fist excitedly before the doors pushed together. He sighed as Finland continued his degrading behavior and looked down at his wife. Oh, Finland, why...?

"S-Sweden, I...I...Oh, my goodness, I-oh! Oh! OH!" Finland wrapped his arms around Sweden's hips and pulled him close. "Uhn! Oh~!" He pounded and ground himself faster and harder into Sweden's thigh, moaning and grunting and hiccupping and screaming obscenities as his whole body began to convulse. "Oh, my body! M-my body! Oh, dammit Sweden, stop being so damn hot- UHN!"

I'm almost too afraid to ask how this could get any worse... Sweden's thought was answered as the elevator opened on the fiftieth floor. Standing there were two nations and a young micronation, all of them flinching backwards and staring with wide eyes. ...I wasn't serious, I didn't even ask the question!

"WHOA! HOLY SHIT!" Iceland said as he blocked the two with his hands. "OH, DUDE!"

"...Yikes," Norway half-chuckled.

"M-M-M-Momma?" Sealand whimpered, his fragile youth completely shattered. His lips quivered as he was getting ready to cry. "P-P-P-Papa?!"

"Sorry, kiddo," Sweden muttered, his gaze turning sad at the horrified and scarred expression on his son's face.

"Yeah, uh, this is weird," Norway stated as he covered both Iceland's and Sealand's eyes and guided them from the elevators. "This is why taking the stairs is the healthier choice, kiddies..." A chorus of "Yes, sir" was heard as the elevator closed its doors.

God, if there is one, please strike me down now, Sweden silently prayed.

"Sweddie pie, oh man, I'm c-c- I'm losing it! I want you forever! You're my damn bitch from here on out, GOT IT?!"

Sweden sighed. "...I guess..."

Then it happened. As they were nearing the floor that was Sweden's initial destination, the sixtieth floor, Finland twitched and tossed his head back, letting out a high pitched wail of great ecstasy. He bucked his pelvis upward in a stiff, rough motion before moaning one last time. Sweden looked down at Finland's face; his eyes were half-lidded and cheeks burned a deep red as he panted to catch his breath. Tears streamed from his eyes and mixed with the sweat drenching him from the forehead down to the base of his neck. Whatever bit of hair that wasn't glued to his forehead or temples from the sweat stuck out in a gravity-defying mess; the black rose hair clip went missing sometime ago. Finland leaned into Sweden's torso and sighed, loosening his thighs around Sweden's as the internal heat subsided.

"Mmm. That was-hic- fun~..." Finland purred tiredly.

"If you say so..." Sweden agreed half-heartedly. He patted Finland's head, looking away again and feeling great relief at the finality of whatever the heck he just experienced. Soon after, he felt a warm wetness run along his thigh. Oh, shit, is he peeing?! Panicking, Sweden shoved Finland away by his shoulders and looked down at his leg. It wasn't a urine stain.

It was a sticky white streak running along his thigh, some of it catching onto the hem of Finland's skirt as it brush against it.

"...My pants!" Sweden said in a mixture of a whine and scream, pulling at the clean sides of it with his fingers. He gaped down at the mess in disgust. "Finland, this is absolutely-!"

Finland pulled Sweden's face down by his tie and took his lips, sucking and chewing and licking in a sloppy, lust-filled kissed. He pulled away panting and bore his stare into Sweden's eyes. "...I think I wanna go for round two..."

"THERE WILL BE NO ROUND TWO BECAUSE YOU JUST RUINED MY FREAKING PANTS!" Sweden snapped. He snatched his tie away and fussed over the mess. "Ugh, it's starting to smell! And we're already here! What the hell am I going to do?!"

Finland waved his hand dismissively. "Don't worry, I'll do it on the other leg to match!" He started to lift his skirt and press himself on Sweden's other thigh but Sweden blocked him.

"No! You had enough for tonight, you freaking horny- gah! This is so-! Ugh! Disgusting!"

Finland rolled his eyes and scoffed. "Whatever, Sweden. Man, you can be such a wet blanket sometimes!" He snuck a grope of Sweden's crotch before turning away. "Give me a call when you- hic- wanna loosen up. Other than that, thanks for the hot time!" He skipped out of the elevator happily, his skirt bouncing up and giving the world a peek of his round buttocks and his tired-out penis.

Sweden stormed out of the elevator and headed to the direction of the bathrooms, fuming inwardly and dying of embarrassment.

In the security room of the hotel, America and Prussia were hooting in mad laughter at the video recording they had stumbled upon.

Hearing the commotion from outside the room, Denmark cracked the door open and poked his head inside. "Hey, what's going on, here? I wanna laugh, too!"

"Oh, dude, this video is just- is just the funniest shit ever!" America yelled in his momentary pause of uncontrollable laughter.

"Video? What video? And can't you guys get in trouble for being in here?"

"Aw, don't be such a goody-goody-two-shoes bastard!" Prussia said. He rewound the videotape he and America were watching to the beginning and turned the monitor towards Denmark.

Denmark looked on with a confused frown. "Wait, is that-?"

"Pffft, yeah, it is!"

"Huh." He continued to watch when a young-looking woman walked into the elevator with his little brother. Judging by the unsteady way she walked and what she held in her hand, Denmark could see that she was hammered out of her wits.

Sweddie pie~!

"Holy shit, is that Finland?!" Denmark shouted.

"Dude, you're right in our ears," America groaned as he covered an ear that was close to Denmark. "And yeah, it is!"

"Damn, he makes one hot woman! W-wait, what is he-?" Oh, Sweden, I think you're deliciously hot, too... "BWAH HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Oh, my goodness, seriously?! Ah hahahahahaha!"

And that was the day that Denmark died in a fit of lung-killing laughter, came back to life, and used his brother's embarrassing moment for blackmail and material for a new porno.

The End.

Well, there it is, all out in the open, but now I'm not so sure about this story. It was funnier in my head, but now that I can see it on black and white, I can't help but wonder if this is sexual assault or something. Well, I have written worse so what does it matter...

Tell me what you guys think! :D