Hola mi amigos. This is the first published sorta fan fiction in this category that I've done so far. It is (or will be) a collection of episodic instalments detailing the whacky adventures of Tootie and her fairy godparents. I'm attempting to give the writing the same cheerful, bouncy feeling as the show, so don't expect anything deeper than a meaning-of-christmas style moral or two. Also, Tootie needed a darned last name and as much as I hate messing with that kind of stuff, I gave her one. Yep.

Anyway, hopefully you'll enjoy this! I know I enjoy writing it! :D So, onwards with the first chapter! (PS- Need I say that I do not own the Fairly Odd Parents? Obviously not.)

It was a sunny afternoon at the Tremmorten household. One wouldn't suspect that anything dangerous or detrimental was happening or ever would happen inside its pink and purple walls. It looked like a perfectly normal suburban house.

Of course, once the realization that this house was the dwelling place of "Icky" Vicky Tremmorten, a completely different view of the house would be taken. Those windows with the brightly coloured shutters held horrible secrets- a torture chamber, a room full of children's skeletal remains and a vault protected by fierce dragons containing Vicky's babysitting money… At least, that's what the Dimsdalian children whispered to one another on the playground.

Only one person other than Vicky herself could truly give an accurate account of what went on inside the Tremmorten house, and that was Vicky's younger sister Tootie.

The children's speculations weren't far from the truth, at least in Tootie's opinion. The torture chamber was certainly real, although perhaps it was more of an armoury for her older sister's gadgets of misery. And there were no rotting children's corpses… although Tootie was sure she could hear agonized moaning coming from behind her sister's walls every once and a while. As for the money, it might as well have been guarded by dragons. Vicky was every bit as mean and scary as the scaly fire-breathing monsters, and twice as greedy.

Tootie sometimes wished there were dragons though. Terrible things might go on in the Tremmorten's house, but certainly never anything magical…

Until today, that was.

"Mister Laaaaaamby! Mister Lamby! Where are you, Mister Lamby?"

Tootie Tremmorten dashed up and down the halls of her house, searching for her lost plush-toy. As one would guess from the name, it was a baby sheep. It had disappeared that morning and Tootie was rather worried about it. She didn't want Mister Lamby to miss doll's teatime.

"Oh!" said a voice sweetly from behind Tootie. "Are you looking for your sheep doll?"

Tootie turned around slowly. Her older sister stood behind her, a malicious grin spread across her face and her hands behind her back.

"What did you do with him?" whispered Tootie, fear filling her gut. She knew what to expect. She waited for the outcome.

"Oh, I just borrowed him is all. You can have him back."

Tootie rushed forwards, hopeful that her doll would be in one piece. She stopped short and squealed in horror as her sister held out the sad, headless remains of her doll.

Tootie stared at it, tears beginning to fill her eyes.

"One of my torture tables was wobbling, so I used his head to balance it out. Here, catch!" Vicky tossed the decapitated doll to her Tootie and walked off, laughing uproariously at her sister's moan as she caught the doll and ran off sobbing.

Tootie ran all the way to her room and flung herself onto the covers, shaking. She hated her sister. She hated that her parents were too afraid to comfort or protect her when Vicky tortured her. She hated that a certain boy wouldn't notice her no matter what she did to impress him. She squeezed Mister Lamby's corpse and wished wished wished that someone could come and help her with all of her problems.

At that moment, the doorbell rang. Tootie didn't get up. There was the sound of footsteps from downstairs and her father's voice called up.

"Tootie, it's for you!"

Tootie rolled off her bed, wiped her eyes and trudged down the stairs. Her father was waiting by the door holding a round package in his hands.

"A courier came by and said this was for you." he said, looking slightly troubled. "There's no return address or stamps or markings or anything. You didn't order anything, did you?"

Tootie shook her head, but curiosity was getting the better of her misery. Her father finally shrugged and handed her the odd package.

"I'm going to get dinner started." he said as he left.

Tootie stood and shook the wrapped package vigorously next to her ear. It rattled slightly. 'I wonder what it could be..?' she thought. 'Maybe it's a secret present from Timmy!'

This cheered her up immensely and she bounded up the stairs and slammed the door to her room. She sat on her bed and unwrapped the mysterious gift.

It was a round white and yellow plastic sphere with a three inch circular window set into it. A black nine was emblazoned on the side.

"A magic nine-ball…" she said out loud, frowning. "Weird."

She gazed at it for a few more moments and then shook it again.

"Is this from Timmy?" she asked it. She peered anxiously through the tiny round window and into the swirling black depths inside. The twenty sided die on the inside slowly floated into eyeshot, its face displaying:

"Reply Hazy, Try Again."

Tootie obliged and shook the magic nine-ball again. The answer was the same. Growling in frustration, she tried again. And again. And again. But each time the answer was the same.

Finally Tootie couldn't stand it anymore.

"Rats! It's gotta be broken!" she shouted miserably and tossed the ball away in anger.

The ball flew through the air, hit the wall and landed on the ground with a loud CRACK!

Tootie crawled guiltily to the edge of her bed, expecting to see the ball leaking black ink onto her pink floorboards. That crack had been so loud that the ball had to have broken, and indeed it was split neatly in half. But there was no ink. Instead, the ball was quivering. It shook and shivered in the middle of the floor and Tootie could swear she saw a light growing inside. The light grew quickly and then blasted out, filling her room with dazzling light.

A whooshing sound came out of the brightness and suddenly a pair of small figures were silhouetted against the brilliance. The light faded quickly, leaving Tootie blinking and bringing the figures into focus.

"HEY TOOTIE!" they shouted in unison. They soared up to Tootie, disorienting her. How could they fly?

They gazed excitedly at her through blue and orange eyes.

"I'm Stella!" said the orange eyed figure, proudly.

"And I am Florence!" said her blue-eyed partner in a thick accent.

"And we're…" they said, zooming closer to her and then leaping backwards, "YOUR FAIRY GODPARENTS!"

Fireworks went off with loud pops and bangs, and a huge neon sign appeared in midair, blinking and dancing in a variety of different colours. It spelled out 'Fairy God Parents!' in fancy letters, and both figures zoomed around it, their silvery wings winking in the neon light.

Tootie blinked at them, jaw agape. The fireworks and the sign disappeared and the two crazy characters whizzed to float in front of her, smiling intently. Now that the lights had returned to normal, Tootie had a chance to see her visitors properly.

One was female and one was male. They were both about her height and size, and though they were definitely mature, there was something very youthful, or at least immature in their manners. They both had hair that matched their eyes. The female's hair was a mess of floppy orange bangs and two corkscrew curls around her cheeks. The male's hairdo was similarly strange, a blue swirl with a sort of cowlick sticking out from under it on his forehead. The female wore a cyan-coloured T-shirt and black pants with a floating golden crown on her head, while the male was dressed like a stereotypical Frenchman, a tiny floating beret included. They both had a pair of silvery translucent fly wings sticking out from their shoulder blades, and they both held magical-looking wands topped with glowing yellow stars.

"Soooo, what didja think?" asked the female, who Tootie seemed to remember calling herself 'Stella'.

"You… you're fairy godparents?" said Tootie, in slight awe.

"Yepperdo!" replied Stella, grinning from ear to ear. "Just like in Cinderella! Er, kids still know about Cinderella, right Flo?"

The male, Florence, drifted closer and smiled kindly at Tootie. "Yes. Anything we can do for you right now, Chérie?"

Tootie stared in wonderment for a moment. Then she shrieked, "I wish for a pony!"

The fairies gave each other cheerful grins and held their wands in the air. The wands glowed with magical energy and a large white pony with a shimmering blue mane appeared, and promptly began to chew on the carpet.

"Wow!" squealed Tootie. Both fairies grinned happily at each other, pleased at her reaction. Florence waved his wand and Tootie appeared on top of the pony.

"Now, Tootie-?" he barely managed to say before Tootie interrupted "I wish for a diamond saddle! For the pony!"

The fairies waved their wands again, obligingly. A glittering saddle appeared beneath her, startling the pony slightly.

"Now, you see, Tootie-" Florence tried again, but before Tootie could interrupt him, they were both interrupted by footsteps heading towards the room.

The fairies looked at each other with panic stricken faces. In a cloud of magic, they became a pair of mice and scrambled under Tootie's bed. Just in time, in fact, for at that moment, Vicky threw open the door.

"Hey, pipsqueak, I was just-" she stopped dead at the sight of Tootie sitting astride her pony. Tootie gulped.

"Where did you- how did you-" Vicky stammered, staring at the large equine beast. Her eyes narrowed. "Okay bub. Where'd you get the horse?"

Tootie bit her lip and stared nervously at her older sister.

"Well?"

"I… I…"

"C'mon! Spit it out, or pony goes to the glue factory!"

Tootie hugged her pony around the neck and whimpered. "Okay okay but promise not to tell anyone!"

An almost inaudible gasp came from beneath the bed.

"I have a secret stash of money in the backyard… I got the pony and snuck him up here… please don't tell!" Tootie gazed into her sister's eyes imploringly.

"Oh, I won't tell anybody." said Vicky slyly. "Only mom and dad!"

Vicky ran off, laughing maniacally. When she was out of earshot, Tootie leapt off of her pony.

"Are you guys still here?" she whispered.

"Yep!" came the reply from beneath the bed.

"Good. I wish Vicky forgot what just happened."

An arm holding a wand protruded from under Tootie's bed. The wand glowed.

"What am I doing?" came the curious shout from below.

"And I wish she slipped and landed on a pie." said Tootie.

Another arm came out from under the bed and waved it's wand. There was a yelp and a splat from downstairs. Tootie chuckled and so did the pair of fairies, who zoomed out from their hiding place.

"You didn't tell her about us!" said Florence happily.

"Of course not!" said Tootie, "she'd just take you away from me somehow. No way am I telling her about you guys!"

"Very good." said Florence, his smile turning to a look of seriousness, "because you can't tell anyone about us. If you do, we will have to disappear."

"Yep. Forever." Stella chimed in.

"Oh." uttered Tootie. She frowned. "So… why are you guys here exactly?"

"Didn't we just say?" said Stella, inserting her pinky finger into her ear and wiggling it around, "We're here to be your Fairy Godparents! To grant your wishes and fulfil your wildest dreams! Long story short little lady, we're here to make you happy! A little bird told us you weren't so hunky-dory! Well, actually, he wasn't really a bird, he was a godparent caseworker, but I guess since he's a fairy too he could probably turn INTO a bird, but he wasn't, so-"

"As Stella said, yes, we are fairies, here to help you," interrupted Florence, cutting off his partner's babbling, "and we love children with big imaginations who make lots of fun wishes!"

Tootie looked at Florence, thinking. "Could the wishes be for… revenge?"

"Yes," replied Florence, "anything you like! As long as it isn't against Da Rules."

"Da Rules?"

"Ooh! Lemme show'er, lemme show'er!" cheered Stella, waving her wand and causing a large purple book to appear in mid air. Its cover was embossed with golden letters spelling out "Da Rules". It had an aura of serious finality, despite its flashy colours. Stella opened the book and flipped through the countless pages, showing off the interior.

"There are many rules," said Florence, "and we have no choice but to obey them. Our wands won't respond to any wishes that violate Da Rules."

"Okay." said Tootie. "Can I wish that Vicky was… was covered in slime?"

"Yes." replied Florence, raising his wand. There was a yelp from below and Tootie dashed towards it, eagerly awaiting her sister's humiliation. When she found Vicky however, she wasn't in the least bit slimy. She was lying flat on her back, evidently having slipped on one of the many roundish green things that were scattered around her.

"Limes?" whispered Tootie, confused.

"Ah non!" said Florence, behind her, waving his wand furiously, "pas encore! Let me try again!"

The limes disappeared, to be replaced by shiny metal coins.

"Dimes?"

"Argh!"

Vicky blinked at the silvery cash and then began to gather it up.

"I'll do it!" squeaked Stella, flicking her wand. The dimes disappeared and a large quantity of green sludge appeared in mid air and spilled onto Vicky. The redhead shrieked and stumbled around, slipping on the slick substance and trying to rub it out of her eyes.

"And I wish there were ants! Lots of ants on the slime!"

With another wave of Stella's wand, the slime was swarming with little brown ants, crawling every which way and feeding off the green guck. Vicky screamed, frantically trying to rid herself of the insects.

"And I wish the ants were biting ants!"

This was too much. Vicky hopped up and down, yelling in mental and physical agony. Tootie doubled up with giggles, clutching her stomach. It was so good to see Vicky in pain for once. Her giggles were rather louder than she'd expected however, because Vicky rounded on her.

"YOU!" she roared, "YOU DID THIS TO ME!"

Tootie stopped laughing immediately. Vicky dashed towards her, arms extended, intent on throttling her younger sibling.

"I wish she was frozen in ice!" shrieked Tootie, backing up quickly. Stella obliged her request and Vicky solidified into an artfully irate ice-sculpture.

Tootie let out a whoosh of breath.

"Thanks." she mumbled.

"Now what?" said Florence.

"Hmm…" Tootie pondered. "I guess we can't leave her like that."

"But we can't incur her wrath when freeing her, of course?" said Florence.

"Ooh! Ooh! I know I know!" piped up Stella, dancing up and down in the air.

"What?"

"Put her in a giant blender! We can make crushed-ice-and-mean-older-sister-smothies!"

"We can't liquify her!" yelped Tootie, "I hate her, but killing someone seems like it would be against the rules!"

"Nah, we won't kill her! Just wait and see! Make the wish make the wish make the wish!" Stella continued to dance impatiently.

After a moment's deliberation, Tootie agreed.

With a wave of her wand, Stella had summoned a giant blender, crates of fresh fruit and a large tub of ice-cream. She dumped the items and Vicky into the blender and hit the button marked 'GO!'.

The blender began to spin with a loud humming sound.

"There aren't any blades!" remarked Tootie.

"Yup!" said Stella happily, "It's like the big spinny fair groundy thingy at the fair! That makes you really sick! Or dizzy! Or BOTH!"

By now the blender was spinning at top speed. Creamy liquid and various unbeaten fruits flew out everywhere, as Stella had forgotten to put the top on. Florence transformed into a large blue umbrella and shielded Tootie from the splatter. Stella got a face full of the stuff and licked it off gleefully.

"Yummy!"

The blender continued its spinning and frothing, until a light began to blink on and off on the side. The blender slowed and finally stopped. Stella waved her wand and a gooey, milky Vicky was transported out of the blender.

She stumbled around, clutching her head and spitting out smoothie. Stella disappeared inside of the blender, and a loud gulping could be heard.

Vicky finally collapsed in a dead faint.

"Can you get rid of the blender and clean everything up?" asked Tootie.

"Certainly." replied her umbrella, who closed himself, returned to his fairy form and waved his wand.

The room became spotless and so did Vicky, but the blender remained, its plastic container showing a rather confused Stella inside.

"Why didn't the blender go?"

There was a yelp from outside. Tootie headed to the window and peered out at her mother, who was standing next to the family car, keys in hand, apparently just having vacated the automobile. The fender was gone.

"Eek! Put it back!" cried Tootie, frantically pointing to the vehicle. Florence waved his wand again, and the fender returned to the car.

"I said to get rid of the blender! What happened?" said Tootie.

"I get- well I- sometimes my magic doesn't work properly…" Florence fidgeted and looked ashamed.

Stella appeared next to them and vanished the blender.

"He always means to do exactly what you want though." Stella said. "He's the brains."

Tootie glanced over at Vicky.

"I wish Vicky was sitting on the couch." said Tootie.

The fairies waved their wands and Vicky appeared propped up on the living room couch. She lay there, still unconscious, but frowning as if she were dreaming a bad dream.

At that moment, Tootie's father stepped into the room. In a flash, Stella and Florence became a pair of mice again and landed on Tootie's shoulders.

"Tootie, Vicky, dinner's ready-" he stopped abruptly at the sight of Tootie's new rodents.

"Where did you get those?!" he cried.

"They were-um- in that package!" Tootie replied. It wasn't totally a lie. "They're from, um, school! Yeah! A special project and stuff!"

"Well… as long as you keep a good eye on them and make sure they don't… get into trouble…"

"I will! I promise! I'll take reaaallly good care of them!"

The redheaded man sighed and shrugged. He tentatively nudged his eldest daughter, a look of apprehension on his face.

"Vicky..? Sweetheart, dinner's-"

Vicky awoke with a jolt and flailed her limbs.

"Strawberries! Bananas! Everywhere!" she shrieked. Then she blinked. "Whuh… huh?"

"You were, um, dreaming, I think." said her father nervously. "Dinner's ready."

He left quickly, in case Vicky should take her fear out on him. Vicky stared at his back as he left. She looked over at Tootie and her eyes narrowed.

"You…" she said, but then her eyes fell on the mice sitting innocently on her sister's shoulders. Vicky was brutish, but not stupid. Something about those orange and blue mice made the hairs on the back of her neck stand up.

"Something fishy is going on here." she grumbled, standing up to go to the dining room. "And I'm gonna find out what it is…"

As soon as she was out of earshot, Tootie glanced at her new companions. Mice weren't her first choice of pet, but up close they were rather cute. She grinned at them.

"That," she said, "was the most fun I have had in ages."

"Me too!" giggled Stella, wiggling her nose, "Literally! I've been inactive for a long time now! How long is an age anyway? Ten years? A hundred years? A thousand? It hasn't been a thousand years yet. If an age is a thousand years, I guess I'm wrong…"

The female fairy continued to ramble as her partner and godchild laughed. Soon after, the fairies took their leave, disappearing and reappearing in Tootie's room, where they set up a cage for themselves. Tootie headed towards the dining room in high spirits.

Things were looking up. Big time.

Now that we've got the boring introduction episode over, we'll get some real episodes in swing! yeah! If you enjoyed, stay tuned for more! Many appreciations- Twiddlesticks