Oh hey. Sup. I bet you thought I'd ABANDONED this. Didn't you. You did. You don't have to lie. It's okay. It's only been near three months since the last one after all.
This is the fourth part of the per aspera ad astra seris! Tada! The previous were, in order, June 21st, Call Me, and Turn.
The fifth one will show up at some point and bring us to a close, and I promise it's a lovely happy ending.
Without further ado, have at!
Thor knows.
Steve has no real idea how, especially as the rest of the team is still oblivious, but Thor definitely knows. It's in his eyes, way more thoughtful than Steve has ever seen them.
Not. Good.
He manages to avoid being alone with Thor for nearly a week.
"How is he?"
It's simultaneously less and more painful than Steve was expecting.
"Who?" Steve doesn't like to lie, but he's not lying. Not really. Asking for clarification isn't lying, and Loki is not rubbing off for him to think that is a totally justifiable excuse. He focuses on the dishes that he's washing.
"My brother."
Steve glances around, because even Thor's quietest voice is a low rumble that usually attracts attention.
"I don't know why you'd think I'd know."
Thor studies him for a moment, making the hair on the back of his neck stand on end, then laughs. Steve has about two seconds to brace before the thunder god claps him on the shoulder and lumbers out of the room.
He's never liked the plastic plates, but suddenly he's grateful for them; it's the only reason the one in his hand isn't broken.
XXXXXX
Ever since the super serum, Steve's almost always been hungry. Most days he's around food enough that he just kind of... grazes, okay, yeah, Tony's right, he grazes throughout the day and it's not like hunger is a new thing for him or anything (he remembers the Great Depression, remembers making little go as far as it could). Thor still eats more than him, so he doesn't feel that bad, and he does what he can to make sure those without food get it.
He is almost certain, willing to swear on a bible certain, that he never told Loki that he's usually hungry, yet at some point Loki had to have figured it out, because for the past few months now he's been assaulted by the smell of food whenever he walks into Loki's place.
Tonight really isn't any different, and even though he just ate dinner an hour ago he realizes that he could probably go for another proper meal when Loki answers the door and leaves Steve to take his shoes off, vanishing back into his kitchen again.
It smells amazing, whatever it is.
He sets the boardgame and movies on the coffee table and goes to investigate. Sometimes, Loki lets him stay in the kitchen while he works; other times he's immediately barred entrance. Today, Loki is standing over a pot full of sauce, tasting it with a thoughtful expression.
"Try this," he orders, offering the spoon to Steve.
It's rich, thick sauce, some sort of meat that he doesn't immediately recognize but thinks tastes a little like beef, flavours he is nearly certain aren't Earth spices or just really good ones, and Steve wonders if it'd be impolite to just eat the sauce and forget the pile of noodles carefully covered and draining.
"It's really good."
Loki snorts, scowling at it, and reaches for one of the many many jars of unlabeled spices that line the spice rack.
"Your opinion is as useful as it ever is."
"It's true. What is it?"
Loki seems puzzled as ever that Steve is willing to eat things when he has no idea what they are-subtle furrow of his brows downward, slight twitch of an almost-frown that never quite comes. (Sometimes, he's a bit surprised at how well he knows Loki's facial expressions, and in how his most honest ones are the least expressive, the most subtle, the hardest to catch.)
"It is a... it is called a 'ragú.' Italian sauce made of meat that is cooked all day, until it breaks down and apart." Then, in exactly the same tone, as if afterthought, "Doom is planning to steal a telescope from your museum."
"Good thing I don't own a museum. And no wonder this whole place smells so good. Is it nearly done?"
Loki scowls at the pot; a cabinet opens and two plates dutifully set themselves on the counter.
"I suppose it will do."
XXXXXX
About a week later, on their way back from stopping Doom from stealing what is apparently a magically significant telescope, Thor gets Steve off by himself again. He has no idea how Thor manages it; it's not like Thor is really a poster boy for subtle, but he does, so Steve just smiles and tries desperately to convince himself Thor is not going to ask about Loki again.
"Hey, Thor. Great work out there."
"Thank you, Captain."
Steve is beginning to suspect awkward silence is maybe just something all Norse deities are used to, because Thor seems entirely oblivious to just how awkward this one is. Or it's possible it's only awkward for him and for Thor it's companionable silence. He doesn't really have a good way to ask, so he doesn't.
"Is he at least well?"
"Is who well, Thor?"
Thor raises an eyebrow, a small smile quirking his lips and eyes sparkling a bit in amusement. It's a look he's not used to seeing Thor wear; it looks like one of Loki's expressions and he suddenly realizes that they are brothers, no matter what has come between them or how very different they are. They grew up together.
It makes a bit more sense that Thor knows a little bit about being subtle, remembering that.
Steve tries not to flush while he waits on Thor to answer the question.
"Your new friend," Thor says lightly, still amused. Steve blinks and very nearly stops walking; he's never everheard Thor say anything that wasn't straight-forward, not in the past five and some years they've known each other. Loki's brother, he reminds himself, even if he apparently hides what that means that just as well as Loki does.
"Yes? Well, okay, yes, he's doing alright." No real point lying about it and it's not like anyone can figure it out with just some pronouns.
He hopes.
"Cap's got a new friend?"
Steve nearly jumps out of his skin as Peter just appears, bright grin on his face.
"He does," Thor says amicably. "I believe they play board games together."
"You guys don't ever pay attention long enough. I had to find someone else," Steve protests. Because that certainly makes it okay to keep hanging out with Loki.
Right. Steve reminds himself that he's making a difference; Loki hasn't attacked the city in nearly six months, hasn't killed any civilians in nearly a year, and of late he's been mentioning, always idly, when the people they end up going up against time and again are up to something. That's why Steve hangs out with Loki: because he's making a difference. That's it. It's not like they are actually friends.
Are they?
"Hey guys!" Peter is waving to the rest of the team. "Cap h—oof!" Peter goes crashing to the ground and Thor looks apologetic, bending over to lift him back up.
"My apologies, Man of Spiders! I must have tripped. Are you well?"
"I think I have a concussion." Peter shakes his head as Thor sets him back on his feet.
Thor laughs, 'patting' Peter on the back and nearly sending the poor kid sprawling again.
"Most excellent! Now let us go and have celebratory pizza, shall we?" Thor throws another of those quick, fleet, and very very Loki smiles Steve's way, then it slips back into his usual bright puppy dog grin as he guides Peter away.
Steve watches them go, chewing on his bottom lip.
"Everything okay?" Natasha asks, falling into step with him.
"I think so," he tells her. "Nothing to worry about, at any rate."
Right? Nothing to worry about Thor's sudden subtlety or how Steve confirmed he's been spending time with Loki. Nothing to worry about at all.
XXXXXX
That night, when he's over at Loki's because he isn't sure how to deal with Thor knowing or Thor's subtlety and he needs someone to distract him that he realizes that he might, just maybe, be in more trouble than he thought.
Because if Loki isn't his friend, Steve's pretty sure he'd never even consider seeking out the potentially-former-villain's company as a distraction.
"You look as if you've swallowed a spider," Loki comments idly, "and it is still crawling on the way down."
Steve blanches.
"Why do you know that?" he asks instead of I told Thor we're hanging out and I think we're friends but I'm not sure when that happened or how I feel about being friends with someone who has killed as many people as you.
Loki only smiles, small and mysterious and entirely indulgent.
"Why did I even bother asking?" Steve mutters. "Mischief. Right."
"Very good." Loki's gaze returns to Gilda. Loki seems to have a certain soft spot for Rita Hayworth, not that Steve can blame him.
"Wait, have you fed spiders to people before? You could kill someone like that."
"Only if it bites on the way down." A fond smile touches Loki's lips. "Besides, it certainly taught Volstagg to chew his food." Loki doesn't even look away from the television as Steve grows more concerned. "Oh, don't look at me like that, it would hardly have killed him if it hadbitten."
"Just refrain from feeding me live things. Please."
That Loki actually has to think before agreeing is worrying.
"I suppose."
And that, Steve knows, is the best he'll get. That he's actually alright that Loki won't explicitly promise not to feed him something still alive, that he actually finds it amusing Loki knows he can't promise something like that, well.
Trouble.
"So?"
Steve blinks and looks at Loki; Loki is watching him once again, face neutral and eyes heavy-lidded. Rewinding the conversation in his mind, he realizes that Loki is asking what's bothering him in his own sideways way. Usually Loki will come out and simply ask, some smirk or mild tease to his voice. This is different. This gives Steve an out. There's no bait, no barb, no implication to try and get a rise. It's... almost concerned.
He hesitates a moment, but this is part of why he came by; Loki has a knack for picking up when he's distressed over something, weirdness and asking differently than usual aside.
"Your-Thor," Steve corrects at the slight narrow of Loki's eyes, "Thoris being strange." There. That's the truth. Steve still doesn't believe that these two are necessarily gods but he will admit that they've proven to have some tie to what myth suggests; Steve has no desire to test out Loki's ability to catch a lie.
Besides, he's never been very good at telling them anyway.
"Is that all?" There is the dismissive shrug that Steve was expecting.
"He was being subtle," Steve says. He figures Loki will roll his eyes or snort at the mere idea of Thor being sly.
He is not expecting the heavy-lidded gaze's shift to predatory, or the tension that creeps into his posture despite how he is relaxing on the couch. It's a glimpse of dark, poisoned edge that Steve has not seen in Loki for months now; it chills his spine while his pulse quickens, making Steve hyper aware of the fact there's no easy way for him to get away from Loki short of jumping over the arm rest.
"Subtle how?"
"Um. You know. Not being obvious?"
Loki continues staring at him.
"I haven't told him anything," Steve says defensively.
Loki studies him for a few moments longer.
Then that's it. The tension, one moment so taut that the air might snap and shatter, vanishes in a rush, Loki languid on the couch and attention directed at the movie once more.
"Of course not," Loki says. "My apologies."
It's only later, once he leaves and he's most of the way back home, Steve realizes he lied. Kind of. It's not like he told Thor that his new friend is Loki. Thor is only assuming it's Loki. Steve hasn't really lied to anyone about anything.
Somehow, he suspects that isn't going to quite cut it.
XXXXXX
For a few weeks nothing else happens. Thor doesn't keep asking question, not even the careful ones, and Loki doesn't question again whether Steve has said anything.
Then one day, Steve sends Loki a text and Loki never responds.
Steve tells himself there's nothing unusual in that. He actually isn't quite sure what else Loki does with his time, but it's not unusual for him to text Loki and not get a response for a few days. He suspects some of the places that Loki goes don't even have cell reception, and sometimes he thinks that Loki's phone is probably just some jerry-rigged together magic and illusion that works purely on the strength of Loki's belief it should work.
It's a little later that week that he sees Thor again; Thor is in high spirits, though he doesn't tell anyone why. Really, that's not too unusual-Thor can be put in high spirits by anything from someone recognizing him while he's in street clothes to winning a particularly difficult fight. The Asgardian has never been one to discriminate with his joy.
Around week two of no response, Steve feels a twinge of worry. He pushes it down; it's early June, and Loki is usually pretty scarce at the beginning of June. Usually pretty scarce through all of June, if he's honest.
Except, as two weeks becomes three and June keeps moving forward, it's unnaturally quiet. Quiet the same way that it used to get before Steve figured out Loki's birthday. Loki doesn't make any appearances and try to get in touch with Steve, but then neither do any of the other people who usually cause them trouble and that worries him.
He's never actually tried calling Loki. First, there isn't much point since usually they arrange meetings by text (or Loki just showing up, and hadn't that been a surprise the first time it happened). Second, Steve's always figured that Loki wouldn't appreciate something that relies so strictly on verbal cues when he clearly works off body language-not to mention the idea of trying to have an honest conversation with Loki without the slight facial expressions Loki has is hard to imagine these days.
Steve leaves the tower before he makes the call, because even if it's true that Tony doesn't have anything in their rooms, Steve would much rather be somewhere he feels safe. Where no one he knows can happen to walk in and ask who he's talking to. He knows he's not a good on the spot liar.
He's disappointed when it doesn't ring-must be turned off-but it does have a voicemail box, which is something at least. He leaves a message, just letting Loki know he wanted to make sure he's doing alright, and hangs up. It's not much, and it doesn't ease his worry at all.
It doesn't help that over the past three and a half weeks, he's found all the ways he misses Loki, all the little reminders that despite anything Loki's done, Steve's managed to grow fond of him. No one in the tower really appreciates old black and whites the same way, or is willing to discuss the new exhibits at the museums and art galleries. He misses the food, rich and hearty and usually filled with flavours he doesn't recognize. He plays a few rounds of Ghost Stories with Bruce and Peter, and while it's fun enough, neither of them have the head for off the wall schemes and ideas and rapid fast adjustments of plans. Both focus short term, and Steve misses having a mind that looks to the long term, the long shadow to his own quick flash decisions.
And really, if Loki's doing better now, if he's not hurting people and he's not ruining lives, not destroying huge chunks of the city anymore, what does it matter? So few of the team are really clean; look at Tony or even Natasha. Maybe Loki's reasoning isn't the most solid, but there's always hope that it will work out, and that maybe Steve will manage to find a way to explain morality in a way that doesn't make Loki scoff.
There's so much else Steve's managed to do, after all.
XXXXXX
"My brother's birthday is soon," Thor tells Steve one night.
Steve looks up at Thor, confused.
"You asked me about it once," Thor explains, frowning as he looks at Steve.
"Oh. That was years ago Thor."
"Was it?"
"Yes." Steve feels suddenly uncomfortable. What had reminded Thor of that conversation? That had been years ago, or getting close to-this year would be what? The second or third year since Steve figured it out himself?
"Time here moves so very quickly," Thor says, oblivious-or seeming oblivious-to Steve's discomfort. After the near stumble and telling Thor about how Loki has been, Steve isn't sure he trusts it anymore.
"It does," Steve says, and tries to go back to drawing.
"Do you sometimes wonder why he no longer attacks so frequently?" Thor says with all the wistfulness he usually reserves for speaking of Loki.
"Not really, Thor. Sorry."
Thor ends up turning the television on to find something to watch. Slowly, Steve's apprehension fades and focuses on his drawing again. It's nothing particularly complicated, just a few birds in a tree, but he's doing it from a half-faded memory from the week before and he's pretty sure he's got the mother bird wrong.
"Is everything well?"
"Yeah, I'm just working on this," Steve says, only half-paying attention.
"Then you've seen him lately?"
"No," he says, then stops. He looks up at Thor.
"Who are we talking about?" Steve asks carefully.
"Your friend," Thor says, easy smile on his face. Steve doesn't look away. "Is it not his birthday soon?"
Steve has no desire to lie. He's never been one for it. He's always thought that honesty is actually the best policy. He doesn't like the ambiguous truths he's told lately, to both Thor and Loki, that aren't true lies but feel like it. After all, Thor is a great teammate, fun and sincere, and working as a team with the sort of threats they do means they need to be honest with each other. They need that trust.
But Steve also doesn't like people prying.
Thor is prying, no matter what the thunder god might think, and it's annoying. Usually, Steve just pushes his annoyance away, but this is different. It's not that Loki is only Steve's, but it's that he knows Loki does not like Thor, does not take kindly to the suggestion of their relation, and Steve has no desire to make anyone uncomfortable. He may have messed up by even implying that he's friends with Loki-and he has no idea how Thor guessed, but he did-but there's no reason to keep it up.
"No," Steve says, and he lets his irritation show because it makes his lie more believable. "His is in December. I have no idea who you think it is, but it isn't your brother."
He gets up and leaves. He feels a bit sick-lying has never been his forte-but he hopes, more than anything, that Thor will finally stop asking, stop implying.
XXXXXX
"You called?"
Steve is pretty sure he can't have a heart attack now, but it doesn't stop it from feeling like he can. Loki didn't materialize, that would involve more startled screams from those around them, but it sure as heck feels that way. He looks up from his book and coffee to Loki; Loki's dressed as casually as he ever does in public, meaning nothing but the finest clothes and a scarf.
There's something dark at the edges, not unlike when Steve mentioned Thor being sly, and it makes him nervous. Tomorrow, he knows, is Loki's birthday. Usually they do something together, small, which at least eases Steve's worry about trying to give gifts to a being who some humans still think is a god.
"I did," Steve says agreeably.
"Is this seat taken?" Loki asks, glancing around the cafe. A formality, Steve knows; Loki always knows when Steve's with other people.
"No."
Loki sits down, coffee materializing on the table as he does so. Steve sets his book down, looking at Loki.
"How've you been?" he asks.
Loki shrugs, taking a sip of coffee; he makes a face at it, and Steve knows it's probably suddenly found itself a lot more heavy on both milk and sugar.
"It's been quiet," Steve adds.
"June is usually a quiet month, is it not?" Loki asks, an eyebrow raised.
Steve frowns.
"It can be." He reaches and takes a drink of his own coffee-black, no sugar or milk, or shouldn't have. He ends up coughing and trying not to spit it out, finding it suddenly sickly sweet.
Loki smiles, all teeth, and Steve straightens. He doesn't grimace, frown, or glare, only meets Loki's gaze levelly. The honest smiles, Steve knows, are with the eyes; the typical ones, the ones that most other people do with their entire face, with lips and teeth and crinkle of crow's feet-those mean something else.
"How have you been?" Steve asks again. "I haven't heard from you in a while."
"I was traveling," Loki looks away and studies his coffee, then his eyes flick to the rest of the room.
"A good trip?"
"It rained," Loki says flatly.
"I'm sorry." Loki looks at him, as if examining his sincerity. Steve doesn't look away, not sure what has Loki so on edge. "Really."
Loki finishes his coffee and stands abruptly.
"I'm sure," he says, "you are."
Then he vanishes.
Steve frowns at the space where Loki was, stomach churning. Suddenly, he doesn't much want to stay and read his afternoon away.
XXXXXX
The next morning, he wakes bright and early.
He keeps expecting something to happen. Tony manages to start a fire in his lab, but that's so commonplace that it doesn't really count. Peter and Logan breaking the microwave is a little odder, but hardly enough to justify his worry. As far as emergencies go, though, nothing proceeds right on happening.
"Are you okay?" Bruce asks Steve near mid afternoon, peering at him over his glasses.
Steve forces a smile.
"Great. Never better."
Bruce frowns, but takes him at his word, and Steve tries to push aside his worry. It's Loki's birthday, there's nothing odd about the date, and, in fact, Steve has already got the cake for this year in his room, something different, because Loki likes trying new flavours. Red velvet cake made with rum-heavy but good, or so he's been told.
When he calls, Loki doesn't answer. Telling himself that perhaps Loki has other plans this year is about as soothing as saying Doom has other Doom bots, because Steve still vividly remembers what Loki's other plans consist of.
"Has anyone seen Thor?" Bruce asks around four, when everyone has been momentarily rounded up by Natasha to interrogate them and find out who's been eating her green tea ice cream again.
There is a chorus of nos, Steve included.
Bruce frowns, Steve realizes that he hasn't seen Thor today, and then suddenly a few things click into place and he wonders if the super serum actually made him smarter or if that was just what Bruce calls a placebo effect.
Thor's good mood, Loki not talking to him, the specific mention of rain, and then Thor being gone today on Loki's birthday.
"I bet Thor did it," Tony offers helpfully. "Hey, Steve, where are you going?"
"We need to find him," Steve says. All eyes turn to him and he realizes he needs to find a way to tell them that Thor is very likely going to set Loki off because if there's one thing Loki seems to hate most of all, it's Thor and his attempts to push his way back into Loki's life.
"Earlier this week," Steve says, casting about, "earlier this week he said something about Loki's birthday."
"Shit," Logan swears. The rest of the team is already scrambling to their feet; it might not happen often, but they all know how things go when Thor goes looking for and finds Loki, which is to say not well. Steve heaves a sigh of relief and only hopes that Thor hasn't found Loki yet. Or at all. That would be nice.
Roughly thirty minutes later, suited up and standing at the edges of a street that has a Thor-shaped crater gouged into it, Steve admits the relief was a bit premature and he was being overly optimistic.
"You do not need to do this, brother," Thor says, pulling himself back to his feet.
The team winces, and Steve hears a chorus of swears in the headpiece.
Loki stands entirely at ease in a suit with his cane tucked under his arm, and examines Thor with an expression Steve is far more used to seeing on his face when he's debating if the food needs any other spices.
"Thor, I wouldn't-"
Loki's eyes flick away from Thor to Steve and he smiles-one with his eyes, spark of satisfaction of a plan moved to completion, like a six or seven turn gambit in a board game that actually worked.
Thor, Steve realizes. Loki thinks that Steve told Thor.
"Move!" Steve roars, fae-fire glimmer in Loki's eyes cluing him in moments before the air writhes and everything goes black. His earpiece squeals feedback then goes silent; he can hear the others as if they're a long way away, startled shouts and even more distant sound of fighting. It is, more than anything, cold. His eyes haven't quite managed to adjust and as he takes a cautious step towards the noises, heart rate speeding up, he feels ice crunch beneath his feet. The air presses tight against him, thick and heavy but not quite water; he can still breathe.
Small mercy.
Something, no, someone-Hulk-passes through him and Steve feels like he's going to vomit. The ice beneath his feet lets off a pale blue glow, in the dark he begins to make out shapes, and he realizes that it's not what Loki did to everyone else but what Loki did to him. The things he can't quite make out begin to circle, sharks smelling blood, and Steve tries to keep from panicking.
No sharks there, when he thought he would drown. He wasn't conscious long enough to see the worst of the dark and cold, and the ice very much didn't glow. He finds the little things that are different-like being able to breathe-and he hangs tight to them, focuses on them. He readies his shield, watching the dark. Waits on it to make the first move.
"Why Captain," Loki says, voice delighted and venomous in one, "you seem surprised."
"You could have just asked me, you know," Steve says, keeping his voice as even as he can.
"And what, pray tell, is there to ask?"
Loki appears, scepter in one hand and other hand in his pocket. He's solid, voice close, not like the ghost of a battle around Steve. As whatever creatures in the dark vanishes with his appearance, Steve straights, looking at Loki.
"About Thor," Steve says.
Maybe Loki can't talk to him directly like this if he's not wherever it is he's put Steve; all the same, Steve's grateful for it. It makes Loki's features clear.
"As if that's important," Loki says, grinning wide, but Steve catches the tightening by his eyes that suggests otherwise.
"I didn't tell him," Steve tells Loki. "I don't know how he-"
"Liar!"
The heat of Loki's magic is blazing against the chill of the air, and never has Steve been so grateful he has his shield. He's already spinning around before the fire is entirely gone, grabbing hold of Loki's wrist. He grimaces as the last trails of fire singes his arm, but at least Loki doesn't vanish. Loki's illusions are never solid.
Loki laughs, undercurrent of something broken edged in it. It reminds Steve of other birthdays, the ones he didn't know were birthdays.
"Maybe," Steve agrees, because one of them needs a level head, and he gets it, gets how Loki came to the conclusion he did. It makes him a little sick, realizing how badly this... whatever it is is going. "But not to you." He bites his tongue before he adds anything else, because anything else will set Loki off. Well, more off.
Steve entirely blames himself for not seeing the next punch coming, staggering back a few steps. He shakes his head, tasting blood in his mouth, and looks back up at Loki.
"You can ask. He kept trying to get me to say it. I lied to him."
Steve can't decide if it's a good thing or not that Loki hasn't changed from his suit to something else. Loki dresses for the occasion, and a suit at least means this is still personal, just between them, and hopefully-maybe-means Loki isn't trying to kill him.
Not that he's entirely sure that Loki won't, as Loki follows him the few steps back, cat leaping on its prey. Steve goes for not hurting Loki, focusing on blocking and dodging. He still takes a few and rolls with them, each of them rattling him to his core and reminding him very firmly that Loki definitely grew up fighting.
"Come on, ask him," Steve says, panting. "I have no idea how he figured it out."
He slips on some ice and Loki grabs him, throwing him. He rolls some, but shards of ice still press against him as he gets back to his feet, ducking beneath a swing of the scepter, only to take a knee to the nose. He blinks past the sting and watering eyes, falling back down as Loki presses his advantage.
"One reason," Loki says, voice ice, face blank, whisper sharp blade pressed to Steve's throat.
"You're my friend," Steve tells him seriously. "You don't like Thor. I wouldn't throw that to the wind to make Thor happy."
Loki doesn't say anything to that. He's utterly still, and Steve barely dares breathe.
Loki lets him go and vanishes. Steve sits up, wiping a hand on his throat and coming away with a few droplets of blood. He lets out a shakey breath, then pushes himself back to his feet, picking up his shield in the process.
"Steve! Are you well?"
He turns to find Thor stepping towards him, Mjolnir half-lowered in confusion.
"Been better," Steve admits, wiping blood away from his nose with the back of his arm. If his voice is a bit terse, well Loki did just try to kill him because of poor communication and Thor not leaving well enough alone.
"What has my brother done? Have you been gravely wounded?"
"Hardly," Loki says, voice dry. "We seem to have had a bit of a... misunderstanding." He smiles, wide and generous and embarrassed. Steve sees immediately its just another of Loki's masks, over acted and mimicked emotion.
"A misunderstanding?" Thor asks and Steve realizes that Thor trusts Loki's expression. That Loki knows Thor will, is playing with the expectation.
"Indeed. Have they turned you into a parrot, Thor?" Thor scowls, but before he can say anything, Loki continues. "You see, Steve tells me you mistakenly believe he and I have been associating outside of these," a slight pause and flick of a sneer, "games we occasionally play in Midgard's cities."
"So you have been using his good will for your own aims!" Thor looks furious.
Steve gaps at Thor. He didn't think he was that bad of a liar, but besides that, that Thor has assumed Loki is just using him, when Steve was the one to make the first move, when Loki has been the one making concessions. It make him spitting angry-the presumption and Thor not asking-and he is about to speak when his throat closes off.
For a second, he thinks, impossibly, he's having an asthma attack, then he sees faint fae flicker in Loki's eyes. Steve's teeth click as he shuts his mouth, and he can breathe again.
Loki's eyes widen slightly, a quick downturn at the corner of his lips.
"I don't know about that," Loki says, voice dismissive.
"Enough of this lie, Loki," Thor growls, stepping towards the trickster.
Loki studies Thor and Steve can all but see the gears turning in his head before he sighs melodramatically.
"Really, Thor? My lie, when you're the one believing this runt of a mortal over my own word? And you claim to love me." Loki smiles, small and edged.
Thor sputters, caught between word and actions, and mentally Steve cheers, because this is a bit better than thumping Thor one in the head and the incoherent defense he had wanted to rise to.
"It is a lie! From both of you!" Thor says, insistent. "I can smell Asgard on him!"
Silence.
Loki stares at Thor, mask dropping.
"What?" Steve asks in the silence.
Thor spares Steve a glance, then looks back at Loki.
"He smells of your favourite foods and spices of Asgard, after he visits with you. Of snow elk and dragon's root, moonspur and helmas drake." Thor scowls at Loki. "I do not know what you have done to convince him that you mean no ill, but you-"
The sound of his shield against the side of Thor's head is probably one of the most satisfying ones that Steve has heard all day. It doesn't hit hard, but it's enough to make Thor shut up and look at him. Steve stands wide, squaring his shoulders against the Thunderer's rising anger.
"He didn't do anything," Steve says. "I gave him a chance, an actual chance, which is more than what it sounds like you do. I looked for him. I can't believe you." Steve doesn't bother hiding his anger or his disgust. "You say all day long he's your brother and this and that, and then you don't even listen to what he has to say and go accusing him when anyone besides you seems to want anything to do with him. What, are you the only one who loves him enough to want to be around him? You think he has to trick everyone else?"
"You speak of things you do not understand," Thor growls. "You do not know him as I do."
"Yeah? I know his favourite movies and how he likes his coffee. I can tell when he's not being entirely honest, and when something pleases him. I know when his birthday is and I haven't forgotten it." Steve tilts his chin up. "Maybe I don't always know wh yhe's upset, but at least I notice it."
If Thor is going to say anything else-and he was, his mouth had certainly opened-he doesn't; he vanishes. Not in a ripple, like an illusion, so that's something at least. Steve settles back on his heels, still running on adrenaline, and looks at Loki.
Loki is studying him. Steve doesn't actually know this particular expression; he hasn't seen it before.
Loki waves his hand, eyes gleaming for a moment; Steve's nose tingles and his eyes water, then he's standing on the city street. The not damaged street and his nose isn't broken and there's no blood and he's pretty sure there won't be any bruises. He looks around, but there's no Thor and no Loki.
"Are you alright?" Natasha asks, closest to him.
Steve glances at her.
"Considering everything? Yeah. You guys?"
"Alright. Loki was just distracting us, but everything looks fine now."
"Makes sense."
"Where's Thor?"
Steve pauses.
"I don't know. Loki sent him somewhere." Steve glances around as the others get closer. "I don't really see finding them and getting to them right now though."
Natasha nods, taking him at his word.
"He'll show up," she says.
"Yeah," Steve says; he knows she means Thor, but he pretends, for a minute, she means Loki.
XXXXXX
Thor does show up. Eventually.
In the form of a golden retriever, Mjolnir between his teeth, tail wagging. If not for Mjolnir, Steve is pretty sure that none of them would believe his collar.
Loki, on the other hand, doesn't.
Tony and Bruce take on the unenviable task of contacting Strange and working with him to try and figure out how to change Thor back.
Steve tries not to think about Loki's absence. It's not unusual, he tells himself, to not see Loki for days at a time. Or weeks. Weeks are more rare, of course, but all the same. It's not unusual at all. And after all that mess, Steve understands wanting to take some time to sort things out. When he checks his phone, frustratingly Loki's number is gone.
Not a huge frustration-he has it memorized-but it's worrying. He calls, it goes straight to voicemail, and his throat catches a little.
"It's okay," he says, then hangs up the phone.
